She announced the idea on the Tenth Anniversary thread:
I’m working on an extra muse issue for the off – months that would consist entierly of matirial written by readers (that sounded really weird). I’ve asked people to contribute some articles and poems on the latest writing thread. Type “for By the Musers” at the top and end with the name you want the article/poem to be attributed to if it’s published. The magazine will be published three times a year, giving Muse a 12 issue schedule without much work for the editors, and giving musers a chance to have their articles published. Like???
WOW. COOLEST THING EVER!
*thinks of topics*
This is such a good idea! OK let me find some stuff to post…
*starts furiously tearing apart desk*
I wrote a stupid sotry/poem on the magic caveman machine. Hopefully it isn’t too random for Muse
that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!that’s a really good idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
like.
That is a good idea!
I just have to think of something.
Not that it would get published, but it’s fun to see if you do have something!
Yeah!
you made a thread for it???? Thanks
So….we post in the Writing thread?
writing thread or here. I’d rather you post here, though because it’s easyer not to have to scroll through all the stories.
What should we dooooooo??????
Here’s a short article.
Frogs can vomit thier stomachs. Yes, it’s true. Whenever a frog or a toad eats something poisonus, the toad spits it out. I know, wierd. But after the frog gets rid of their stomach, they roll it aroung with the hope that the poisonous thing falls off. Then, thay simply eat it again. So if you clear something really wierd and squishy out of your frog’s cage, chances are toady just had his last meal.
That is such a cool idea!!! Like. Absolutely.
So– all kinds of topics? All sorts of ideas? Or do you want to have a theme/topic for each issue? We could write things on those topics so each issue would be a grouping of pieces on that topic instead of randmoness. (Not that I have anything against randomness.)
(12)ewww…
(13) I haven’t thought of a topic, but we should have one. Something broad though.
I wish there were a way to post pictures and things like that. Then we could design the cover and everything.
The following is an article I’d like the editors to post in Muse.
14- good idea! and I think the topic should just be something like, “Random Pickings.”
Can I post some of my stories? I have one nearly finished. Also I have another that’s already finished. If not, I’ll think of some article to post…
Sorry. Make that: MESSAGE on first page.
Okay, here go’s:
SUPPORT MUSE MOVIE
– Message from person who runs first page setup.
-My message:
A few months ago, I discovered the Museblog at http://www.musefanpage.com, and I quickly suggested the idea of Muse Movie ideas thread. The blog administrators, Robert and Roseann (who also run the Q&A page) set it up almost instantly, and it enjoyed surging popularity for a while.
The Muse Movie is supposed to be based on ‘The Attack of the Smart Pies’, by Larry Gonick, the Muse cartoonist.
These days however, not many people are coming onto the ‘Muse Movie?’ thread. It’s a shame, especially since all the Musers had such good ideas.
Most of the comments revolve around who should play various characters, and weather the movie should be live action or animation. I vote for live action.
So come join the fight for justice.
The more the merrier.
Send letters to the mag, or to Larry Gonick at his official website.
I’m hoping to see the movie in theaters, by 2008.
If we all work together, maybe it’ll happen.
KEYWORD: http://www.musefanpage.com
CLICK ON: Museblog
TYPE: (Muse Movie)- in search box
GO TO: Muse movie
POST!
Please come join the fight for justice.
That’s an awesome idea!!! I’m a bit confused, though. Do we post our submissions here or somewhere else?
Morning
In the morning,
the rays of light race eachother
they trip and scatter on the tree tops
In the morning, the sand reflects
and mixes with the shadow
and pulses like an ocean
In the morning, the breeze is cool
but the air is hot in the sun
and warm in the shade
In the morning, the washed out sky
is painted again
by a golden brush.
In the morning, there’s still an eternity
till what comes
at the end of the day.
Something We Found in the Alley One Day
It was a normal day,
a what-do-you-want-to-do
day,
We had seen all the movies
and played all our games
we were looking for something new.
The backyard?
We had memorized. We knew
each nook, each flower, every tree-
No, the backyard had been done.
We looked farther- that empty dirt lot
behind the house, with only it’s empty pit
and lonely acacia tree?
That we knew too, we’d been there before-
Pirates, you see, seeking treasure in the sand.
We tried once more, and looked beyond
the boundaries of our past explorations.
And oh! What we found-what we found indeed
An adventure awaiting our arrival.
For there, tucked between the old, rusty fences
was an alley.
And, my, what an alley!
Forward we went!
Two brave explorers,
in search of a new story
Many terrors we encountered,
and beast we fought- a carniverous plant,
covered in foot-long spines, and a vicous
barking tiger
(most conveniantly restrained by a wire fence)
were not the least of our foes.
But forward we pushed,
our hearts always strong, and our minds fixed-
fixed on that one goal.
At last we found it,
our ultimate treasure,
our holy grail-
A fortress for our imaginations:
A tin palace on wheels, creepers creeping
through it’s cracked, grimy windows.
Some called a old rusty trailer- we called it
Fortress of the Queensnakes
a rather more exciting name
don’t you think?
And so it became just that –
our fortress, and there we went
and there no one found us
we were safe in endless possibilites
of our imaginations.
Attribute it to Sally M., I guess.
I didn’t mean for that to be in bold and italicized. Sorry!
If it is published, could you just make sure the word “barking” (as in vicious barking tiger) is italicized? Thanks.
brilliant idea!
hmm…but what would be in the mag?…
oh pleeeeez do an article on the Mythbusters!! They rock!!!
I saw “the new world”, and I could write a review.
For By The Musers: Revolution in Evolution
You’ve probably heard of Darwin. And maybe you’re familiar with the name of Imanishi. No? Really? Well, there happens to be a remarkably good reason why ‘Imanishi’ and ‘Wallace’ draw a blank in the minds of most people.
For starters, Darwin had advantages from the start. He was rich, he was idle, and he had three heads. All right, all right, I was kidding about the heads. Jeez. His competitor Wallace sent in a paper to the Royal College. Darwin’s buddies there saw that the paper used Darwin’s ideas about evolutionary theory. In other words, he was about to get scooped. They managed to delay the process long enough, frustrating and annoying Wallace, so that the two papers were published simultaneously.
How did Darwin get on top? you ask. Keep your pants on, I’m getting there. Darwin succeeded in having the more famous paper because his was more complete. He had the invaluable advantage of not having to work for a living.
Spin to the other side of the world, please. In Japan, Kinji Imanishi, a Kyoto professor, decided to reform-in a slightly more Japanese fashion, if you will-the basic ideas and tenets of Darwinism.
The Japanese had no problems or cultural hang-ups over the evolution process. To the Buddhist or Confucian mindset, there is not the slightest insult, deprecation or degradation in the suggestion that apes are our evolutionary “cousins,” so to speak. Later, Japanese primatology research facilities were the first to name animals while the West, Europe especially, still relied on numbers. Also, Imanishi came from a working class background and had a decent public image, so he was more readily believed than scientists with similar ideas, such as Darwin (whom we just met) or Konrad Lorenz.
Imanishi’s theory quickly became known as Imanishiism. It was popular in Japan, but European scientists considered Imanishi too radical. Over time, his school of thought began to “choke up” Japanese universities and thinking. The younger generation eventually clouded over Imanishi’s memory, and the West simply trampled over him. Wallace, the chap who came four decimeters away from being Darwin, died of illness as an old man and was buried in a pauper’s grave.
So gurus, especially scientific ones, never last. But evolution, and the science and lives of people today, have been radically changed by these people and continue to be that way.
QJ,
Are you sure you aren’t related to Paul Baker?
That’s interesting, Queenie. I had heard of Wallace, but not Imanshi. And the thing I read about Wallace made it seem as if he we stealing Darwin’s ideas, not publishing his own.
I think I’ll try a short aritcle on Impressionism.
Thanks for fixing my poem GAPAs! You guys are 10 times better than best, even better than frozen choklit coveres cheesecake on a stick. (Which is pretty good, you have to admit).
Yes, that’s high praise indeed. We are honored.
I didn’t know that queen j! Nice. Definitely publish.
I like the pome too (21).
Everything’s great…this is an absoluetly brill idea kali!
I’d write an article, but i have to think of something to write about….
Mebbe i’ll dig up some rant from my xanga, if that’s not too random for you. Hang on.
This is a rant about teachers written during exam time, so no offense teachers.
*sigh* People. Come on. It’s so simple! You KNOW the teachers are in a terrible conspiracy against us poor, innocent students right? You’ve known that all along. Well this is just one of their devious plots to totally ruin our future working career. Teachers are bitter. Look at the job they got stuck with! So now they wish the same horrors upon us. Eventually our brains will rot so much that all we’re good for is teaching, and we’ll all become teachers and have our minds twisted by the long hours of torturously stupid students. Then we start to wish revenge upon those sadistic teachers that brought us to this. Finally, we figure if we can’t get back at our old teachers (Said teachers being dead, otherwise indisposed, or thousands of miles away) we’ll ruin the lives of a couple hundred poor, innocent students. It’s a vicious cycle, and one that smart students will stay out of. Methods of doing this are as follows:
A-Never ever listen to a teacher
B-Never take candy from a teacher
C-Do your homework with as much complaining as possible (complaints being a good mental block against the deterioration of your brain)
D-Eat lots of choklit (Choklit also acting as a sort of antidote-if you splel it right)
E-Pay the least possible attention to your homework by multi-tasking (watching tv, listening to music, etc)
F-Always, always, always cram for tests (this makes you forget everything you learned, protecting your brain from the sheer dullness of it all, while still giving you a good grade. Unless it’s vocab or something else accumulative. Then you’re screwed, and must take either the brain damage or the bad grade.)
There you go. You have before your amazed little bug eyes (plus a discount on the lashes-twice as long for half the price!) an extremely effective way to defend yourself against the horror of perpetual skool and the evil minions of this dark power, namely the teachers. Use it well. We regret that all methods must be used at the student’s own risk. No refunds. Copyright Elizabeth Allen the Force of Good and Protecter of the Victims of Exams
Ooh, here’s my rant about skies.
Ever notice how the sky isn’t always blue? People say, “The sky is blue,” in such tones of absolute conviction that you start to believe it must be true. The sky is blue! Of course! Such an obvious fact need not even be mentioned! And yet the sky is by no means blue all the time. Always blue? How boring! Right, sometimes it’s gray! Or different shades of blue is also possible-sky blue, greyish blue, deep blue, bright blue…
But still, even with these different colors (namely, grey and blue) and various shades of the aforementioned, the sky must be an extremely boring object! Fortunately, there is another factor we have not yet commented on, which would be the clouds. The clouds can be large and puffy, wispy, or nonexistant. They can also be various shades, ranging from white to dark, dark, dark, dark, dark grey. The clouds are never blue. An interesting fact to note is that the clouds often correllate to the color of the sky-if it is a dark, grey sky, you see dark, grey clouds. If it is a bright blue sky, you tend to see large, puffy, white clouds. People often see pictures in clouds, and some enjoy lying on the ground and staring at the sky. We can only conclude that they are delusional, and imagine the sky is a big-screen tv.
Even with all these interesting factors, we must admit that on the whole, the sky is an extraordinarily boring place. We could add in birds and airplanes, but even they are not significant enough to relieve the monotony and bleakness of the sky. Yes, we admit that the sky changes colors, clouds, and other things, but altogether it would be a much better place if it changed a bit more dramatically. For example, if occaisionally it was bright pink with clouds shaped like hairbrushes and malls. Then the next day it might be pitch black and have white clouds with black marks on them that look like writing (suicide notes, no doubt). Yes, the sky would indeed be a more interesting place if it was modelled after society. But there you have the human race being egotistical idiots. As usual.
Thus ends my lecture on The Sky. I hope you enjoyed it, and will, in the future, take a greater interest in your surrounding. Maybe to the extent of looking at the sky occaisionally, yawning, saying, “How boring,” and getting back to writing about your life on xanga, which of course is infinitely more interesting than mine. (PLEASE! LET SOMETHING HAPPEN! RELIEVE MY BOREDOM! OH I JUST GOT AN IM! YOU SEE? THERE IS A GOD!)
April fool’s day!
To fool, or not to fool.
That is the question. Whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against the sea of-ack! *is pied*
Random shakespearean moment of insanity over. Now, to business.
It is April Fool’s Day. Or is it? Not much is certain about this rather elusive holiday, given the fact that it is the one day where it is perfectly acceptable, socially, morally, and conscientiously, to lie. Yes, i fear that lies are rampant today, not only in the immediate area, but all across the nation. So what are we to believe? When people say, “April fools!!!” does that mean that what they just said is a lie? But how can you not be sure that the very words they use to excuse their lie, are in fact, a lie? Perhaps these words are simply a lie to cancel out the other lie, making it a truth. Therefore, it is quite possible that you might actually have spiders in your hair. There is no real way of knowing. Oh, what uncertain times we live in! Is there a hippo in your backyard? Are your shoes infested with cockroaches? Maybe there is a piano falling from the sky! Maybe it really is about to land on your head! Maybe the Great Koko himself is behind you, pie in hand! Maybe somebody did accidentally step on your most prized, expensive, and fragile electronic possesion (whatever it may be)! Maybe…but i digress. Suffice to say, it is indeed a day for maybes, and many of them.
Is this very entry perhaps lying to you as well? At first glance, it seems to be a good-natured warning of what the day might hold, but it is, after all, occurring on April Fools Day (or is it?) I might simply be lying to you as well. There is no way of knowing. You are now on a quest for the Truth, but what exactly is that? Or are you even on such a quest? Perhaps you are content to weather the storm, to try and wait out these great storms of untruths. But i fear you are being misled. By whom? Well, that is another thing you must decide for yourself. For example, is today even April Fool’s Day? And if so, is it in fact a day of lying? I could be lying to you myself, maybe today is the Day of Ultimate Truth! It is up to you to decide. Alas, for the uncertainty of the day.
Oh yes, and in case you didn’t notice, a UFO just landed on your lawn.
A random story about Joe.
One day there was a boy named Joe. Joe was bored. Joe decided to go into a children’s book.
Joe is running. See Joe run? Go, Joe, go! Joe is running very fast. Joe stops running. Joe is tired. Joe ran fast. Can you run as fast as Joe?
But this was extremely boring, and Joe didn’t like it much.
So he went onto one of Ebeth’s xanga posts.
Unfortunately, he was used to the children’s book style, so it didn’t work to well.
Ebeth’s xanga read:
Joe is updating xanga. See Joe update? Go, Joe, go! Joe is updating very well. Joe has stopped updating. Joe is tired. Can you update as well as Joe?
So Ebeth kicked him off, and Joe wandered the streets, poor, broke, homeless, exhausted, starving, desperate. He began to steal from more successful characters, but they’re bodyguards always beat him up. Joe died a lonely, hungry, useless, empty man.
Morals!
A-Pick a better name than Joe.
B-Avoid stupid patronizing little kids’ books like the plague
C-Learn how to write like you know what your talking about (not that anybody ever does…humans are so stupid…)
D-Ebeth is bored
E-Why do you read these moral things? Do you really think they will make you a better person?
F-Joe never ate any weetabix in his life. I rest my case.
G-Find something to do
H-You are getting veeerrrryyy sleeeeeeeepy…
I-Don’t drool on the keyboard please…
J-Joe starts with a J
K-Don’t be cruel and heartless like Ebeth and kick people. Especially not people named Joe.
L-Never speak in l337 unless you’re bored, you’re an idiot, or you really, really want to. (wait…that’s redundant)
M-Since when do characters need money? Why don’t they just write some up for themselves? Joe is really very stupid…
N-No way i’m going through the whole alphabet here. This is enough. Just two more
O-Orp.
P-Please don’t burn my cow.
Here’s a recent one about haircuts.
Hello kiddies. Today’s rant will be about haircuts.
Haircuts are yet another proof in action of the absolute stupidity of the human race. We snip our hair off, fully aware of the fact that it will grow out again in next to no time. Not only this, but we also have the horror that is “shaping”. Yes, we “shape” our hair-that is, make it look nice and purty, so that it can grow once again into a shaggy mess. What, I ask you, is the problem with a shaggy mess? But that’s not the focus of today’s rant. Now i ask you-what is the psychology behind the average barber?
Well, this is an interesting question, and one not easily answered. You see, barbers as a species are embedded in the whole general pointlessness of life like solid rock. Cutting hair, as mentioned above is so obviously completely and utterly pointless, therefore your barber must be somebody willing to accept the complete and utter pointlessness of their career. Now this is all well and good, for the most part, but a human mind can only take so much. Yes, working day after day in an occupation that is a complete sham by definition, your average barber goes insane. This is not a problem either. Insanity is a widely accepted and incredibly useful means of dealing with the things you’d rather not. It is, in short, the ultimate device of elusion. (Yes lizzy, elusion, not allusion. ) But the profession of hair-cutting has its own particular brand of insanity, that can drive your average customer just as insane. It’s a vicious, never-ending cycle. We have to come back to get our hair cut. That’s what you do. And yet if we do, that means we must come back again. I predict complete pandemonium in the near future. That is, if we do something about it! Rise up! Rebel! Make a shaggy mess the new style! Boycott all barbershops!
But i digress.
The point is, the barbers’ particular brand of insanity is such that it correlates directly to the excuse they had in the first place for going insane. Ie-pointlessness. Yes, a barber, driven mad by the sheer pointlessness of her/his occupation, will turn that pointlessness around and exact revenge on the innocent customer. Take, for example, irons. You have 1 (one) flat iron and 1 (one) curling iron. As their names suggest, the former puts hair down flat, and the latter curls it up. The mentality (ie insanity) of the barber is such that both will be used in the process of the haircut-not only both, but on the same bit of hair. Yes, the barber will first curl it up, then flatten it down. Or vice versa.
As i mentioned earlier, this vicious cycle must be broken. I predict that in the near future, haircuts will become obsolete as the sheeplike consumers (baaa) wake up to the fact that they are spending a load of money for absolutely no reason. So rise up! Wake up! Get up! Up, up up! Boycott haircuts! Let’s all be hippies!
Or not.
That’s everything worth posting. Doubt you’ll use it all. Sorry it was such a long stream of Ebeth. I got excited.
I didn’t re-read any of that either, just skimmed, so if you see any inside jokes either ignore or ask for info and i’ll make them outside jokes. If you use any of these, those should probably be cut out.
Kiki – I’ve never seen Myth Busters, so you’ll have to write the article.
(37) I sooo agree! I see the point in cutting hair, but all the “shaping” buisness is annoying. But if no one ever cut their hair, it would get akward. No one wants their hait falling int the toilet.
(27) It’s a great srticle, but is there a shorter name I should attribute it to? If you got that from a book, I might need a bibliography. They’re so annoying to write, but if you used a book the people who wrote it might want credit. There’s an onling bibliography maker called “noodlebib express.” [Links deleted. — Rosanne]
28-Not entirely.
34-R____ scattering! Fill in the blank for a grillion extra HPB points. Is anyone keeping a running tally?
39-Frans de Waal, The Ape and the Sushi Master. Harvard University Press, 1992. That’s a major source, but really, I know most of that that useless info from years listening in to my father’s scientist buddies bicker and argue in French. And anyway, it’s only three measly words. Oh, all right. How about “Darwin Takes Credit”? Or “Darwin? Pah!” Says it all, you gotta admit. Since I, a stutterer, have actually spoken to Mr. de Waal, if only briefly and on the telephone, I feel I deserve to be able to use his admirable book in a piece for such an estimable magazine as MUSE.
This is a totally flamablamabulous idea, BUT we need to have some organization. Here’s my plan:
-Pick a topic that we can centralize the issue around. For example, llamas.
-Assign certain people to do certain things. For example, put a person(s) in charge of the graphics, someone in charge of edting, a resource supervisor, creative writing guru(s) for the month, etc.
Fairly simple. You think it’ll work.
Could we add some fiction? Possibly stories that continue from issue to issue, a la Cricket? I’d definitely contribute then, but my poetry and essays just aren’t that good.
How’s this getting published anyway? Would the company put it together and mail it and all, or would we have to find some way to do that ourselves?
Well, there’s always the Web.
I have no idea if this will even go in the gallery. I just hope the editors and GPAS are taking this seriously and not just waiting for us to get tierd of it.
(42) I didn’t think of adding fiction, but it would be great if some people would write short stories.
This IS a cool idea! Darn… I am not a very good writer when I don’t have a good topic…
I’ve finished the “regular Stuff” section of the table of contents (I’ll put the actual titles in later):
Regular Stuff
1 First Page
by someone
2 Crraw’s Page
6 Muse Mail
7 Kokopelli & Company
by Larry Gonick (reprint)
15 Q&A
by this dude
And that guy
27 Math Page: Stuff
by someone with too much
time on their hands
44 Muse Contest
48 Last Page: lasty stuff
by a keyboard zombie
And here’s New Stuff:
New Stuff
8-36 Article thingies
By the way, there’s a list of previously requested articles at https://musefanpage.com/NewFiles/list_request.html for ideas.
Post 21: I love that poem, Skipper Nancy! ‘Twas great.
Ebeth, you must be Shell Silverstien reincarnated. Seriously.
ooo cool! I love to write, and everyone says it’s good, so assign me something and it shall be done.
Hey, GAPAs, I got an article idea, but itwould require some cooperation on your part.
I was going to write something about the people who do all that stuff to make Muse happen. The people would include you, Ivars Peterson, Paul Baker, Nancy Kangas, and whoever else I think of later. It kinda be an interview thing. It would chronicle your jobs at Cricket Publishing Co., your hobbies, interesting experiences, weird and completely random quotes, etc. And then we’d run images of each person. Except for PB&J. We’d run the portrait of some out-there Elizabethan dude for that.
You like? If anyone has any objections or suggestions, speak now, or forever hold your peace.
I AM NO LONGER WORKING ON THE MUSER – WRITTEN MUSE PROJECT DUE TO LACK OF ARTICLES. NO ONE HAS POATED SINCE MAY. ANYONE WHO WISHES TO TAKE OVER CAN.
Darn. I was going to offer to contribue my muffin article to it too. When I finish it, that is.