Muse Academy Game Room, v. 2011
Rumor has it that a new Paker game is forming.
To see how the last one turned out, check the previous Game Room thread.
Date: March 3, 2011
Categories: Muse Academy, Nonrandom Craziness
Friday, 29 March 2024
Life, the universe, pies, hot-pink bunnies, world domination, and everything
Rumor has it that a new Paker game is forming.
To see how the last one turned out, check the previous Game Room thread.
Date: March 3, 2011
Categories: Muse Academy, Nonrandom Craziness
Yay!!! New Paker game!!
Just to recap, here are the rules, as posted by POSOC, copied from the last thread
From POSOC:
Long Version: There are at least eight major suits: Herons, Hares, Hedgepigs, Roses, Eclairs, Peanut Butter, Chorley Cakes, and Muffins. These consist of the usual rankings: Ace, King, Queen, Jack (or Knave), 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2 (or Deuce). There are a multitude of combinations one can make from these, which create various effects on the game, and more are being invented all the time. In addition to the standard cards, there are several dozen rare cards, which either cannot be categorized into any suit (such as Anarchy, HPB, and Cheshire Cat) or are specialized variants of a suit (such as Wung of Jasmine or Mess of Eclairs), and have various specialized uses. These are also being invented throughout the game. A notable one is the Golden Wung, which can only be played by the High Bailiff and signifies the end of a round. When a round ends, all temporary rules in the previous round are made null unless otherwise specified.
There are a great variety of points, the major ones being Creativity Ceylon and Wung. Wung points can only be placed on the table by the High Bailiff. They can be brought into play when the Bailiff awards them to a player or when a player lays a claim to them. In the latter case, a claim can be challenged by another player or players. The claimants then battle it out for the wung points. Wung points, once in the hands of a player, can be exchanged willingly between players or captured from a previous owner in a duel.
Creativity Ceylon points can be arbitrarily created and awarded to other players once created, for acts of great honor or imagination.
All kinds of points can be placed at the four cardinal directions to create various offensive and defensive positions.
Short Version: Make it up as you go along.
As High Bailiff, I lay down one of the Golden Wungs. End of round. I also end the game. Wung point totals are reset, as are board, deck, and dimensional modifications.
We’ll use a different board this game, I think. Let’s see…. Ah, here’s a nice one. Bit dusty, but that’s all right. This board is large and square, with a square taken out of the middle–a bit like a square doughnut, if you will. Use it to your advantage.
A handful of rules that aren’t mentioned in comment 1:
-As High Bailiff, I have final say over any disputes, rule changes, or other such dilemmas that may arise.
-Keep impossible physics, Armageddon-esque constructions, overly sticky pastries, destructive moves, ridiculous nonstandard cards, and the like to as much of a minimum as is humanly possible.
-Any move that I deem to be unfair, bending the rules too far, or obstructing the game for the other players I will declare null and void.
-You cannot give yourself Wung points or take them away from other players. You may only win them in normal gameplay or be awarded them by the Bailiff.
-Be nice.
-Don’t forget your towel.
All right. All new players are automatically granted 10 Wung points. Deal yourself out a hand from the deck at your leisure.
I’ll get us started:
Using an alternation of Muffins, Hedgepigs, and Peanut Butter, I carefully build a small bridge across the nonexistent section of the board. I lay down a perpendicular bridge by the same pattern, forming a stout cross in the middle of the board. In the middle of this cross I place a miniature bastion containing fifteen Wung points, guarded on all four sides by Knaves of Herons and Hares supported in the rear by a seven of Eclairs. I also place five Wung points in each of the very corners of the board, shielded only by a three and seven of Hedgepigs.
Do we keep Wung points from previous games?
I play the Nine of Chorley Cakes, the Ten of Peanut Butter, the Knave of Muffins, and the Knave of Eclairs, and proceed to mash them all together, thus creating Ezekiel’s Greater Tasty Sticky Mess near the west edge of the board.
I take my fabulously lucky hand of a 4 card straight of chorley cakes, which I then use to build a humble tower of comestibles dangerously close to the north-eastern corner of the nonexistent patch.
Does the hole in the board go to any parallel universes/pocket dimensions/etc.?
I play the Three of Hedgepigs, Nine of Eclairs, Ten of Muffins, Seven of Chorley Cakes, and Ace of Peanut Butter. The pastries combine into a Minor Delicious Confection of Deliciousness, and the hedgepig spreads the peanut butter on it, making it a Major Delicious Confection of Deliciousness. The hedgepig moves the whole lump to the Greater Tasty Sticky Mess, and writes words in the peanut butter asking AM for an alliance.
I place the Three of Herons and Seven of Roses on the south side of the board, forming a Flying Thorny Wall.
3- No. As I stated, Wung point totals are reset.
5- No, it’s just a section of board that isn’t there. You can see through it to a coffee stain on the table. (I think the stain was originally Polish, but she moved to southern Minnesota at a young age.)
I lay the 2, 4, 6, and 8 of Roses on each corner of the board, playing the Rhodion Gambit and invoking the famed Pea-And-Three-Cups Routine. The cards switch places constantly, creating an ever-changing defense of Roses. This backs up the Ace of Hares that I place near the center of the board as an opening move. I then use the Linus Ploy, and clutch my towel tightly and stick my thumb in my mouth.
I play the 2,4, and 8 of Hedgehogs on a slightly elevated section of the board, along with a 9 of Chorley Cakes. I merely intended the Chorley Cake as a refreshment for my Hedgehogs, but the little known Paradox of Mess comes into play and converts my Hedgehogs into the dreaded Orderly Prickles. Used improperly, these can ruin any good Paker game with their obsession with neatness. To avert this, I instantly throw most of the rest of my hand at Ambystoma’s freshly created Greater Mess. The addition of so many hastily played cards to an already somewhat unstable Mess causes a small explosion and spatters of Chorley Cake batter all across the board, adds the potential for the Mess to spontaneously convert into Ezekiel’s Greater Tree, and leaves me with few cards to defend my Wung Points with, but the Orderly Prickles are instantly distracted and start making their way toward the Mess with the intent of sorting it out.
With any luck, it’ll keep them busy for the rest of the game.
I play the Six of Hedgepigs, Nine of Herons, Two of Hares, and Four of Roses between the Orderly Prickles and the Mess, forming a square. The combined effects of the cards create a Improbable Answer Defense, and it’s neatness prevents the Orderly Prickles from sensing the Mess, diverting them towards the Pea-And-Three-Cups Routine.
Greetings to one and all.
Good grief, we’re playing Ezekiels already! We need a bit of stablity, I think.
Concretion of Roses. That’s the usual method. 2 to 9 of roses, arranged strategically around the missing section. That locks the ends of the cross-bridge (yes, I spotted that one, Piggy) and forms a Hot-Cross Burn. I attach the 4 and 9 of hares to create Oriel’s Cradle. The missing section should now be considered a Region of Short Limbo. Any cards anchored on it, or referring to it in more than a purely incidental sense, will remain immobile for two moves.
I play my Queen and King of Herons, who rally the dust mites on the dusty old board. When I have them gathered, I play my 2 of Hares to make my 2 GIGANTIC dusts bunnies, through a combination of the Hare and the dust mites. I then set these to guarding my wung points. They snarl and shoot dust funnels at anyone who comes near.
I play the Three, Four, Five, and Six of Herons along with the Eight of Hares in a pentagon to form a Greater Summoning Symbol. The symbol summons rainclouds, which rain into the Region of Short Limbo and fill it with water. As the water begins to permeate the board, I play the Ace, Four, and Nine of Roses around the missing section. Because of the water, the roses begin to grow (sucking up the water), and form a Thorny Expanding Wall which a new rose appears in each turn.
I shall refrain from making another move until a few more players have made theirs. I will, however, remind everyone that there is a second Golden Wung, which is freely accessible, subject to the High Bailiff’s veto (and any Wung tax he wishes to impose on its use). It’s not in evidence, however. It’s probably hiding behind the aspidistra again. Anyone wishing to use it will need to do a house search.
You’ve forgotten your italics, good sir.
My thanks, worthy thegn. It is the niceties of life that are most subject to the corruption of age.
I watch the Orderly Prickles nervously. Sending them to the Routine was not a bad idea, but once they’ve finished converting that into the Pea-And-Three-Cups Habit, who knows what they’ll turn their attention to next. I had hoped to utterly fix their attention on the Ezekiel’s Mess, as sorting out an Ezekiel is a nearly impossible task and would probably take them the rest of the game, but as long as there’s a Mess of that size and instability, they’ll probably be distracted and won’t ever get as far as trying to make sense of the rules. If they do get that far, we’re all in trouble.
Perhaps it would be wisest to cage them. I draw a few more cards in search of a good way to do so.
I play I knave of hares to split my dust bunnies into 4 smaller bunnies, who with the combination of the knave become the dreaded Chivalrous Sneeze Warriors. Two of them stay to defend my wung points, but two others go to try to take the wung points in one of the corners.
However, this is only a distraction, and I lay an Ace of hedgepigs with a Knave of Roses, which combine to form a Thorny Rogue. The flowers are taken off the roses and he is covered in stems with spikes on them. He’ll blend in with the environment and and sneakily steal the wung points, and cut down to pieces anyone who spots him. Lets see how that works out.
((So, do we just start posting/playing? If not, please notify me and disregard this post. I am still new to Paker.))
I look suspiciously and calculatingly at the dreadful Orderly Pickles, and decide to create an orderly setup, at least for now.
I play a Three of Muffins, which combine into a Single Giant Muffin wich lands somewhere in the southeast quadrant of the board. I then throw on top of it a Four of Eclairs, which stand upright and adjacent in a vertical rectangular prism formation. I top all of this with an Ace of Chorely Cakes, which forms a roof, creating a Comestible Tower. I then play a Five of Peanut Butter on the tower, sticking it even more firmly together and creating a Stable Comestible Tower. As of right now, this tower is empty and has no particular function. I separate exceptionally promising cards from the others in my hand, and sit back to watch what happens next.
I play the Three of Hedgepigs, Ace of Hares, Jack of Hedgepigs, and the Nine, Eight, Seven, and Six of Herons, creating a Norwegian Straight, which stomps off across the board to the north corner, in the hopes of capturing the Wung Points that reside there.
I play the Three of Herons and Knave of Hares, which combine into a Flying Lookout. When the Thorny Rogue gets close to any of the Wung Points, the Flying Lookout will fly at it and trim its thorns with the sword in the Knave’s picture on the card. I then play the Three, Five, and Nine of Hedgehogs and the Ten of Chorley cakes, all of them upside down, creating the Disorderly Prickles. The Disorderly Prickles are of course intent on having messiness, so they first head towards the Stable Comestible Tower. Once they’ve made that unstable and less ordered, they should notice the Orderly Prickles.
I watch the flying lookout eerily. This could easily counter my Thorny Rogue’s plan of sneaking in. So, before I send my Rogue in, I borrow some water from Optimatum’s previous Greater Summoning Spell and combine it with a 9 of Hedgepigs to make nine Juicey Fish. I give them to my Thorny Rogue. When the Heron tries to trim his thorns, he throws the fish over to one side and the Heron dives for it, distracted. The Thorny Rogue is now one step closer to the Wung Points.
With the rest of my turn, I decide that even with the Dust Bunnies, my Wung Points are far to open. I combine a Jack of Hedgepigs with a 3, 7, and 9 of Roses to use the Magic of the Past ploy, then play a Queen of Roses in this ploy to form a Magical Druid. I then give the Magical Druid an Ace of Roses, and she uses her powers to make it grow into a Thorny Stronghold, which is basically a giant hollow rose. I store my Wung Points in said structure, and then set my Magical Druid and Dust Bunnies to guarding it.
19: You can’t take the water without any cards involved becoming immobile for two turns. Therefore both the Rogue and Fish cannot be moved for two turns.
While the Rogue cannot move, I play the Three of Hares and Five of Herons on my Flying Lookout, turning it into a Flying Haron. The Haron swoops down over the south-east corner of the board, bypassing the Hedgepigs and Roses because it acts as a trump, and takes the five wung points. It then flies back and hides them in the Flying Thorny Wall, upon which I play the Four and Two of Roses. The combined power of the roses creates a Two and Forty Enchantment, so the Flying Thorny Wall now permanently entangles anything I have not played that tries to penetrate it.
Paul says “The missing section should now be considered a Region of Short Limbo. Any cards anchored on it, or referring to it in more than a purely incidental sense, will remain immobile for two moves.” I am not referring to the missing section, I am referring to the water in the missing section. Is that too direct? besides, your roses are soaking up the water, and they aren’t frozen (You said a new one grew every turn). Piggy, what do you think?
SFTDP. If I am correct and my cards are not anchored, here is what I do
My thorny Rogue steps up to the Wung Points and grabs them, storing them in his stems. One of the dust bunnies breaks away from the distraction, and he steps into it, forming an Armored Vehicle. It moves to my stronghold, where it deposits the Wung points and stands guard.
My roses are sucking up the water that permeates the board so it doesn’t become soggy. However, to get any water, your cards would have to go to the hole, which is referring to the missing section. Also, which wung points are you going towards?
I’m going after some of the Wung points in some other corner, since you already took the ones in that corner.
The board, I believe, is made of polished wood, which wood not absorb any water your roses could absorb. And if your roses can get the water, why can’t mine? The Thorny Rogue is basically a plant/person himself, so he could just lay down roots. He’s smart enough to know not to go to close the the missing section, so that is what he would have done.
SFTTP-Sorry, but I should probably specify that I took the Wung points from the Southwestern corner, just to avoid confusion
I play a 3 of hares and a 4 of hares.
They get up and dance around, in a waltz. I play a 6 of Roses on top of it, creating Aberford’s Delightfully Destructive Dance. They sprinkle Roses on top of everything on the board, while playing a fairly happy and sprightly tune. The Roses, as well as being a wonderful decorative arrangement also have the added benefit of destroying anything comprised mostly of plant life, including the Flying Thorny Wall, and unfortunately the Floris Floridia perched upon a mantleshelf of the game room. I wince was the Bailiff takes enough money to replace it.
I play the Three of Roses, Five of Hares, Seven of Hedgepigs, Nine of Peanut Butter, and Queen of Chorley Cakes. The hare and hedgepig stack the Chorley Cakes, glueing them together with Peanut Butter, and the roses grow over them. This forms a Chorley Castle, which my hedgepig seals my wung points inside with the Four of Muffins.
Then, noticing the board is starting to become soggy, I replant my Thorny Expanding Wall, which sucks up the water. I add a few hares, herons, and eclairs to it so it cannot be destroyed by the Delightfully Destructive Dance.
Realizing that Optimatum is a worthy adversary, I play a Queen and King of Hedgepigs. The two work together to create an Elven Embassary out of my Magical Druid. Then, I send the Elven Embassary over to Optimatum’s area, where she uses her magic to make a small hole in his wall that she jumps through just as it closes again behind her. Once in, she tries to negotiate the terms for an alliance with Optimatum.
(Want an alliance?)
My Norwegian Straight reaches the North corner and challenges the hedgepigs there to a duel for the Wung Points.
With the remainder of my turn, I play the Queen of Eclairs, giving the hedgepigs a weapon, the Seven of Hares, the Wise of Herons, and the Eight of Peanut Butter, creating a minor Library. I then play the Seven, Two, and Jack of Roses, along with the Four of Muffins and the Five of Chorley Cakes. I lay the Four of Muffins to the North and the Five of Chorley Cakes to the South, causing them to morph into the Pastry of Change. The combination of the Pastry of Change and all of the tomes in the library creates an Ever-Shifting Bookshelf. I seal my Wung Points inside the minor Library with the leftover globs of Peanut Butter. A bit crude, but it’ll have to do. Anyone attempting to get to them will have to battle with wit and literary knowledge. They are also protected by an Ever-Shifting Bookshelf. I then plant the Roses in a circle around my Library. In two turns I will have a Rose Garden, which causes those who attempt to cross it to be delayed for one turn while they stop and smell the roses.
Paker ♥
(A rule I forgot to mention: make all moves in first-level comments, i.e., not in reply to another comment. It’s impossible to follow the game if moves are made in subcomments.)
(And a hint: try to play off of other people–that is, work off what they do, don’t just start your own bastion and try to make your own little isolated game. Interaction is the key to Paker.)
I toss a Six of Sponges on the board to soak up the remaining water and give Optimatum a look that says, “You’ll be revarnishing this board once the game’s over.” I mentally note that the Wung Points seem to be taking on characteristics of their namesakes; what they seem to be doing cannot possibly be obedient to the laws of our four dimensions.
I play the 3 of Roses, and then the 5 of Peanut Butter on top of it. It creates the Chorley Tower, with a Peanut Butter Cupola. The Roses are then destroyed by the Delightfully Destructive Dance, leaving me with a hovering Peanut Butter Cupola. I play a 6 of Hedgehogs on the Peanut Butter Cupola, creating a dangerously spiky barrier. I then place a 5 of Muffins within the Cupola, and they sit there not doing much except for smiling at random passerbys.
I review the board… The Region of Short Limbo could be a problem later, especially if I want to get those 15 Wung points that lay inside. I play an Ace of Herons and Hares, which combine to form a Speedy Ace.
I then play an 8, 9, and 10 of Peanut Butter and a 1, 2, and 3 Roses, which are so different that they form a reversal effect, which I use on a Minor Sticky Mess of Chorley Cakes and Eclairs, forming a Slick and Speedy Surface, which I attach to the feet of my Speedy Ace to make a Blur of Aces.
The Blur of Aces is so fast that when he is immobilized by the Region of Short Limbo he will simply revert to a normal human speed. I draw a few more cards and start planning what to do with him.
28: Wouldn’t it be immobilized no matter what speed it is?
Since AM has not yet decided to form an alliance with me, I cancel the request and accept Koko’s Apprentice’s offer. I then play the Three of Chorley Cakes, Five of Eclairs, and Seven of Hares around KA’s Thorny Stronghold, and add choklit, forming a Major Choklit Leporidae Defense. This means that any cards from other players approaching get turned into chocolate rabbits.
Now for the offensive. I play the Three of Hedgepigs, Wise of Roses, Seven of Hares, and Wise of Eclairs to form a Major Library. Because knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass, and mass warps reality, the library goes on forever and eventually intersects with Mikazuki’s library. I send the Three of Hedgepigs through the library to steal two of Mikazuki’s wung points, which it places with my other ones. Finally, I seal the library shut with the Seven of Peanut Butter by sticking all of the shelves together so that the exit is covered, and the shelves cannot be moved because that would damage the books and is therefore not possible. (Because damaging books, except Twilight, is sacrilege.)
Actually, no. Power =/= energy. Power equals energy over time.
And E=mc^2.
So knowledge = power = energy divided by time = The square root of mass times the speed of light divided by time
(Energy doesn’t equal mass. It equals mass times the square of the velocity of light in a vacuum.)
I was quoting Terry Pratchett.
SFTDP
Also, perhaps that should be knowledge is power is energy is matter is mass, but not necessarily the same amount.
Creative licence!
And the Awesome Power of Twenty Million Copies Sold Worldwide.
29: No, I was meaning to say that he was so fast he was faster than the power of the immobilization could handle, so he just reduces to regular human speed.
I don’t think that really makes sense because the power of the immobilization was not specified to happen over time or only to a certain amount. Any chance of clarifying, Master Baker?
But this guy’s speed doesn’t go to a certain amount either. If the immobilization thingy sends him to zero, he’ll just zoom right back up to normal again. It’s his ability.
While you have been debating the finer points, I have set up a Full Concurrence of Hedgepigs, using Piggy’s cross-bridge as a nominal focus. I set it rotating, and anchored the centre with the Ace of Hares. I threw in the Five of Roses, generating a Nelson Shuffle. Now you’ll really have to watch the Region of Short Limbo. Any cards detained therein are likely to emerge after two turns as Hedgepigs. That might make life very interesting.
I leave my Elven Embassary with Optimatum. He can use it to strengthen his defenses with its nature magic.
Meanwhile, I set to work on a whole new plan. My King and Queen of Herons are getting restless, and I must give them something to do. I play 4-9 of Peanut Butter in ascending order clockwise in a sphere around them, which invokes the Occupation Summoner. The King and Queen decide that they need a Hedgepig Tax Collector, so I give them a 5 of Hedgepigs, which immediately dons a suit and snazzy top hat. The Hedgepig Tax Collector decrees that anyone using the letter X in any of their posts except when naming a card will owe me a Wung Tax of 2 Wung Points.
I then use my Blur of Aces to set up a Peanut Butter Shield around my Thorny Stronghold, blocking entrance to anything that somehow did not get turned into a chocolate bunny.
To join, I play the Deuce of both Hares and Hedgepigs surrounding the Hurdy-Gurdy. This creates a Avon Gambit allowing me to enter play.
I play the King of Muffins on my Chorley Castle, turning the outside wall into a Major Bakery Bastion. This means that none of the castle can be destroyed, as the bakery will immediately produce more pastries to repair the damage.
Didn’t our Bailiff, Piggy, make a rule about things not being indestructible?
I play the 4, 7, and 9 of Peanut Butter to form a Sticky Solution Ploy. I lay it out where the Delightfully Destructive Dance is going on so they will tire out as the sticky peanut butter sucks at their legs. It will end in 2 turns. Mwhahahaha!
Suddenly, I realize that nobody has been paying attention to the Orderly and Disorderly Prickles! Luckily, they seem to be fighting in the region around Ezekiel’s Tree. I play the Eight, Nine, and Four of Hedgepigs as well as the Three of Roses. The subsequent death of the Roses by the Destructive Dance combined with the influence of the Hedgepigs acting with the Prickles causes that area to become slightly dimensionally disconnected with the rest of the board. Hopefully, this will delay the Prickles, and they won’t end up going after the rulebook. With both sets out, I can’t imagine the damage that would cause to the game.
I then play the Six of Hares, which burrows a small hole in the Southeast corner.
It’s still a Mess, not a Tree.
While the Prickles are distracted, I play the Two, Three, Five, Seven, and Knave of Eclairs around them to form a Prime Pastry Pentagon. I then play the King of Peanut Butter inside it, sticking the Prickles together, and they then fuse into the Prickles of Patterns. These are half Orderly and half Disorderly, so orderly things will become more ordered and disorderly things will be disordered even more.
I decide to launch a powerful offensive using my most powerful pieces. I combine my Blur of Aces, Thorny Rogue, and Dust Bunny to make a Spiky Speedy Shielded Sandy Swindler of Scariness. (SSSSSS for short) He has all of their abilities put together, which means he is immune to immobilization, has powerful spikes, and is made of reforming dust mites. I send him zooming toward the Region of Short Limbo, with the intent of stealing the Wung Points there and making a quick getaway. I also play a full dodecahedron of an Ace of each of the major suits, which creates the Mire Manuever, which will slow down the rotation of the center enough for me to get on.
To aid KA, I play the Three, Five, and Seven of Hedgepigs and the Four of Herons around the Region of Short Limbo, anchoring them with the King and Queen of Peanut Butter. This temporarily deactivates the Nelson’s Shuffle for just long enough for the SSSSSS to get in and out without hedgepig transmutation, and also freezes the Knaves of Herons and Hares in place until it has gotten away.
People! GET BACK HERE!
I draw myself a hand, and then miraculously play 9 aces. I then proceed to build an indestructible house out of cards to be a safe shelter for my wung points , sticking it together with various sticky pastries, and lots of peanut butter. I then wipe up the excess sticky gook with my towel, which I did not forget, and safely seal my wung points in the house with a barricade of chorly cakes. Then my wung points climb up the towers of the card house to man the hedgehog catapults and eclaire balistas, muffin slingshots, and buckets of boiling peanut butter to dump on foes. I’d like to see you try…
Indestructible houses of cards are not keeping in the spirit of Paker. Yours has been downgraded to a destructible hut of cards.
Ok. My hut of cards is thoroughly destructible, but still chucks hedgehogs, eclaires, muffins and peanut butter at you.
Throwing pastries at the Grand Bailiff is a good way to get yourself kicked out of the game. *wags finger*
I play the Four of Herons and Two of Hares, which combine to form the Forty-two of Harons. Because of the effects of the implied Infinite Improbability Drive (which is fortunately not present) the Haron becomes immaterial and drifts through the game board until it is underneath oobatooba’s card house, when it appears out of the board and grabs three of en’s wung points. The Haron then floats back into the game board and goes into my Chorley Castle, placing the wung points with my other ones.
But because of the improbability drive, there is a time warp, and it is now my turn again. I equip my stolen wung points with the 5 of eclaires, 8 of eclaires and queen of eclaires, secretly, and as soon as my wung point spy is in Optimatum’s stash of wung points, it begins bashing herons and hares on the back of the head with the eclaire, blinding them with chocolate and cream. it then frees five of en’s wung points, who all run away to live in my destructible card hut since it is cooler than their previous house, and there are lots of delicious things to eat, and my wung points have very good diplomatic skills. On the way out, they steal Optimatum’s improbability drive, which is then equipped to my card hut, which is promptly transformed into a spaceship.
No, because I specifically said the improbability drive was not present, so it only applied to the Haron.
Ooba- Our High Bailiff has asked that all moves be made in first-level comments. Please do not make moves while in reply to another person. Thank you!
Now that the board is in my grasp, my SSSSSS darts in fast as lightning, slices through the hidden blades that pop out of the bridge, grab the wung points, darts out, moving so fast no one can see it.
Optimatum finds 5 wung points in his stronghold, and within the Thorny Stronghold the remaining ten wung points are placed. I then play a 1 of eclairs, one of hairs, two of chorley cakes, 3 of roses, a five of peanut butter, and an 8 of hedgpigs, creating a Fibonacci’s Gambit.
This was intended to strengthen my defenses, however because of the mystical forces created by Pi day, disorder comes to my pattern and creates and creates a Probability Ploosh, blowing my Thorny Stronghold up and impaling many creatures with it’s thorns. After this startling turn of events, I surround my Wung Points with my SSSSSS, my chocolate bunny effect, and a thorn wall that I scavenge from the wreckage.
I play the Three of Muffins and the Ace and Four of Peanut Butter, creating an Irrational Peanut-Flavored Muffin Defense around KA’s wung points. This nullifies the remaining effects of the Probability Ploosh, preventing any (particularly) unusual occurrences in advance.
The game is progessing splendidly. There are many things I could do, but for now, I shall simply observe.
The Hedgpig Tax collector does his rounds, and finds that OOBATOOBA has used the letter x!!
“then wipe up the excess sticky gook with my towel” he says in post 40.
My Hedgpig pulls out his decree, and says a few words. Two wung points appear in his hand, stolen from the house of Oobatooba. He then walks away with his nose high in the air and places them inside my fortress.
You are hereby fined two Wung Points for possessing two stolen Wung Points. Oobatooba is awarded two Wung Points for having been robbed of two Wung Points. The collector is advised to collect the tax, not steal it. The collector is also advised to keep his nose from sticking up into the air too far. We wouldn’t want anything to happen to it.
Hello, people.
SFTDP
GET BACK HERE, PEOPLE!
Optimatum, where are all of your wung points located? I’m afraid that trying to figure this out is making my head hurt. Are they in the Major Library? (Of course, it will probably say this in a really obvious way in one post, but I can’t find it. *feels stupid*)
Because the Major Library first initiated contact with the Minor Library, the Minor Library becomes a Wing of the Major library. Your library is my library is your library. I play the 3 of Hares and the 6 of Hedgepigs, which promptly form a Tea Brigade. They being to nibble at the peanut butter politely, using proper manners as they do so. I also lay down the 7 of Herons; the Herons donate their wings to the Library as well. The Library takes off.
The wung points are inside my Chorley Castle.
Right, then. Let’s complicate things. In the centre of the table, at right angles to my full concourse of hedgepigs, I place a minor concourse of herons. That’s allowed by the Carlos Principle. With Piggy’s cards, the centre now contains a Double Cross, beneath which the Nelson Shuffle is still in effect. The Region of Short Limbo is now a Region of Strange Limbo. Cards played near the centre are likely to disappear for up to three turns, then reappear as hedgepigs. Or herons. Or disappear completely. Or turn into wung points. Or vice versa.
I know. It makes playing anything at all fiendishly difficult. But I think you can handle it.
Me being the strange person I am, as soon as I see the change in the Region of Short Limbo, I throw a Two-Man Gambit at it, used by playing a 4 of Hedgepigs and an 8 of Herons, respectively. They are sucked up, and I turn my attention to the rest of the board.
I play an Ace of Herons, set it in the library, and then send a 2 of hedgepigs with a small 2 of chorley cakes walking by the Heron. The Heron smacks the Chorley Cake away, thus becoming a Strict Librarian. The Heron takes roost in the library and scolds the library for not checking itself out of the library before the library takes off from the library’s spot. Under the death stare of the Strict Librarian, the Major Library can do nothing but return itselft to it’s original spot.
My SSSSSS then has the dust bunnies that form it split off from it, and they return to their original form as dust mites, which jump straight into the Region of Strange Limbo. With luck, some of them will come out a few turns later as Wung Points, so I think of it as an investment. Lets call it my 401k.
This thread is rather dead. *waves magical wand of thread reviving*
I throw a wung point and two Eclairs into the Region of Strange Limbo in an attempt to discover exactly how it works.
The Region of Strange Limbo turns into an avocado.
I use the 6 of herons to eat the avocado.
I disappear, and return a few turns later as a heronpig.
Shoot, my investment turned into an avocado. Stupid recession.
I decide I need to hide my wung points where no one will find them, so I lay down a 4 and six of Herons with a stout barricade of Chorley Cakes in the middle. This forms The Illusion of Herley, which creates of semblance of an empty space where my Wung points lie. Inside, my Herons still lie in wait with deadly pastries.
My tax collector does his rounds, and exempts Optimatum from the normal tax because of clause 6, section 2 of my Bill of Taxation which states as follows:
6.2 An exemption shall be given to any player who has within his abode or person a letter of Alliance with the mighty Koko’s Apprentice.
I play the Six of Herons atop the Eight of Chorley Cakes, forming a Flying Cake Dropper that drops cakes on cards below it.
I play an Ace of Herons on my tax collector, who then flies off TO FIND MORE PEOPLE TO POST ON THIS THREAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I then play a 1,2,3,4 quartet of Peanut Butter combined with a quintet of Chorley Cakes to create a portal to a ramdom point on the board. However, anything going into the portal will forever be portalized, and must go through the portal every turn.
REVIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
REVIVE REVIVE REVIVE REVIVE REVIVE
We need a new game.
SFTDP
I have been playing a written (plus a drawn board) version of Paker with several of my friends and we have managed to create and destroy the entire universe in it. Enceladus created a smaller Sympathetic Model of the board in the center of the board which is affected by anything that happens on the board and affects the board when something happens to it, and has its own model, which has another model, etc. Three wung points were placed in the inaccessible center of the infinitely small model. Then AM made a time delay affect the models. Anything done to the real board would affect its model after one turn, the next model on the next, and so on. Anything done to a model would affect the larger board on the turn before. Thus, the three wung points at the center of the smallest possible board became infinitely big and infinitely far in the past on the level of the real world. They are the universe of this Paker game, or at least until the Hedgepig I am placing in the very center model arrives and creates life. (And then I will somehow remove the infinite wung points making up the universe, destroying it infinitely far in the future.)
We need to make this an official school club.
I am inserting a post here to verify that the Games Room is still open. Paker, anyone?
Will this Game Room serve, or should we open a new one for 2013? Depends on the response, I suppose.
Paker sounds like a most excellent idea.
As I said on the Random Thread, I’m up for Paker.
The newly refurbished Game Room is ready to roll.
Huzzah!