RRR* The Sea Roc (a.k.a. Capt. Pye & Co.) — Part 5
Continued from Part 4.
*Round Robin ‘Riting
Date: July 9, 2008
Categories: Fiction, poetry, and fanfiction
Comments RSS TrackBack 364 comments
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Cat's Meow
in July 9th, 2008 @ 15:24I’d help, but…I’m utterly pathetic at editing.
Anybody noticed that I tend to disappear from an RRR whenever it needs editing? -sigh-
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 9th, 2008 @ 16:23OMG!
I was just in the midst of reading an old RRR (has taken me a LONG TIME) and suddenly looked up at “Most Recent Posts” and saw “RRR Searoc”. My first thought was, “How strange. There hasn’t been a New Searoc since……. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!” Which brings me to the present.Thank thankyou thankyou for giving us a knew thread!
Also, thankyou GAPA’s for correcting my bad grammarness. It has never been my strong point.
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Purple Panda
in July 9th, 2008 @ 17:43I love editing, but it’s just so hard and disorganized on MuseBlog.
*sigh*
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Alice
in July 9th, 2008 @ 19:11Kiwi- Firstly, they would use parchment. Secondly, I think a lot of those commas are there for effect and should stay like that, at least for the time being. Which brings us to our third point. At this point, small grammar changes such as those are time-consuming, especially since a great deal of them will be no longer be around by the time the editing is done.
As another matter entirely, it’s super hard to edit on MuseBlog. Argh.
Thanks for the new thread, GAPAs!
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 10th, 2008 @ 06:03OK!
Oh, I was thinking, don’t we need to seperate the Searoc into chapters?
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Alice
in July 10th, 2008 @ 12:085- That’s another thing I think we ought to do after the editing, so we know where to put chapters to make the readers suffer.
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Cat's Meow
in July 10th, 2008 @ 12:234 – Yeah, I think I might like editing better if it wasn’t on MuseBlog. It’s just so hard to keep track of everything.
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The Bookworm & Lurline (410 piepoints and two B-Day Points and 42 KAG Points!)
in July 10th, 2008 @ 17:59May I join in here?
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Alice
in July 10th, 2008 @ 20:538- Well, it’s a little late. We’re done writing now.
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Purple Panda
in July 10th, 2008 @ 21:40We could still use some help editing, though, if you’re up to reading the entire story.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 11th, 2008 @ 08:168) Most definately! You can join! We’d love your help!
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The Bookworm & Lurline (410 piepoints and two B-Day Points and 42 KAG Points!)
in July 11th, 2008 @ 16:22Could you post the unedited story? I’d help you edit, then!
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Alice
in July 11th, 2008 @ 16:4112- Ergh. OK. Fine. -deep breath-
Look, I’m going to go over this for plot holes and fix them, then I’ll post the whole story as I’ve edited it, and we can do writing and a little bit of plot as well, probably. Maybe Bookworm’ll be able to spot holes that we’ve never noticed.
I would tell you to read our notes so you knew what the plans were, but that would be cruel on many levels and probably less helpful than harmful, so you can just read the story.
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The Bookworm & Lurline (410 piepoints and two B-Day Points and 42 KAG Points!)
in July 11th, 2008 @ 17:28Thank you!
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Alice
in July 11th, 2008 @ 17:4314- No problem.
Eh, I’m only at the bit where Tam’s finger gets cut off. Oh, and that scene needs HELP.
-gets back to work-
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Mogget's Little Sister (AKA Kyra)
in July 12th, 2008 @ 03:43It’s so not too late to join… I joined when they started editing…
Ummmm I will edit. Really. Just as soon as I get the HPBs off my back… then go to camp… then come back… then start on my English project… then… then…
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 12th, 2008 @ 09:5015) *shudder* I remember that part. *shudder*
Hmmmmmmmm. I think I agree that it’s hard to edit on MB. I think I’ll just print out a copy and investigate it that way. It’s just easier that way……..
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Alice
in July 12th, 2008 @ 10:2016- English project. -shudders-
17- It is a bit gratuitous.I’m beginning to seriously wonder how much of the whole Uknowables thing we can take out.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 12th, 2008 @ 11:2518) Hmmmmmmmmmm. I was thinking about that too, but, really, if you think about it, we really don’t have all that much writing about it in the actual story. They’re just mostly a background presence felt throughout the book, but not really spoken about. Whatever we take out, we’d have to be careful about it. Tis a delicate structure…….
Grrrrrrrrrrrrr. I started reading a random section, the part where Pye and Swinely are talking in prison. And Swinely’s account of how he got where he was totally confuddled!
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Alice
in July 12th, 2008 @ 11:5719- The whole thing is totally confuddled!
Oh well. I’ll finish writing and then we can confer. Bother, though. I hate editing on MB.
We need to have a Sea Roc editing kokonvention.
-imagines- -makes list of editors-Kiwi
MLS
Pan
Meow
Bookworm
POSOC (?)
MeSpeaking of POSOC, he needs to be here for the discussion of the removal of the Unknowables.
-thinks- -opens Mail-
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Robert Coontz (Administrator)
in July 12th, 2008 @ 12:00((Editing will get a lot easier when I find time to install MuseWiki. But that might not be for another month or two.
There’s also an experimental WordPress plug-in that’s supposed to make it possible to display Google Documents in a blog, but I’m not sure whether they can be edited here.
Anyway, we feel your pain and are looking for ways to ease it.))
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Alice
in July 12th, 2008 @ 12:36Oh, what’s the point? -dies-
I’m not going to suggest that we start over completely like we did with Terraformed. That would be ridiculous. But we might end up rewriting most of it anyway.
Look, here’s the thing. If Ren’s going to be offered a position as a powder monkey, someone’/s going to have to write a battle or two to insert into the story where he actually does powder monkey stuff, because otherwise it’s just another awkward piece.
Oh, I have so many issues to address, and I’m just putting off editing further.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 12th, 2008 @ 12:3820) Oh dear! But we couldn’t remove the Unknowables all together could we? I mean, aren’t they part of the reason why Mordrid wants Tam to use the Orb? Or something like that? *rubs temples* Grrrrrr. Complications.
I have now determined that complicated stories are fun to write, but the devil to edit.
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Alice
in July 12th, 2008 @ 12:5123- We couldn’t remove them entirely, but we could leave them completely in the background.
And no. Mordran wants to get a fire powerful into his hands so that he can use the Orb and take over Sphaere, but he’s pretending to be doing this for the Emperor, so that [Sanguinis IX] can wipe out all the rebels. Vashkar is extremely devoted to the Emperor and while he is working for Mordran, he has no inkling of what Mordran plans to do.You know what?
I’ve decided that having edited the first and most confusing half, I will simply post the whole thing now, even the bits I haven’t edited yet.
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Alice
in July 12th, 2008 @ 13:06THE SEA ROC
By PseudonymThe Inner Sea had formed hundreds of years before, when the lowland flats in the
center of Sphaere had been deluged constantly as the Age of Ice ended and the great glaciers melted. Now, the only land surface of Sphaere is the mountains around its shores.
The Sanguiz Empire soon took advantage of the confusion caused by the Deluge to expand its territory from the handful of states it once commanded. As our story opens, all of Sphaere is under its iron grip.
That is, almost all.
Hardy bands of seafarers, disgusted with the decadence and corruption that infects Sphaere, have taken to the Inner Sea and the scattering of lawless isles in its center. They raid the prosperous, Empire-sanctioned merchant ships that cross the Sea and bamboozle the incompetent navy.
One ship in particular is notable among these: The Sea Roc.Ren Splayr dashed down the narrow alley, the loose soles of his sandals flapping on its damp bricks. The whistles of the soldiers weren’t far behind. Ren hoped he could get to the seafront before they caught him and he went the same way as his uncle. Perlan Ethor, Ren’s only remaining family, had taken him in when his mother died and his father disappeared. Now Perlan was gone too, shot by the captain of the guard for writing an article about corruption in the Sanguiz Empire. Funny how a few strokes of ink in the Hermetopolis Gazette could translate into a puff of alchemical smoke, a flying musket ball, and death. Ren was wanted too, simply for knowing Perlan and “possible aiding and abetting propaganda against our glorious Emperor Sanguinus IX.”
Ren’s only hope was to stow away aboard a merchant ship bound for the opposite side of Sphaere, all the way across the Inner Sea.
“Where are you running to, boy?” said a gruff voice, and Ren looked up into the eyes of a man. Probably a sailor of high rank, to judge by his clothes. Maybe even a captain. He wore a very large and ridiculous three-cornered hat. In spite of his present state, Ren wanted to laugh, but there was no time. He dodged the man, and sped off down the alley again.
Octavio Pye watched the boy go. That was him, sure enough. Ren Splayr. Why was he in such a hurry?
A bunch of officious-looking people in the uniforms of Imperial soldiers rushed down the alley after the boy. Octavio was experienced at looking as though he had no idea what was going on. The guards didn’t question him.
So the boy is in trouble with the Sanguiz Empire, Octavio mused. I think he won’t refuse a job aboard the Sea Roc.
He turned and took one of the many shortcuts he knew to the harbor.Ren ran on, his heart pounding in his chest, his breath coming ragged. He reached the harbor, and looked wildly from side to side for a place to hide. The soldiers were gaining, and there was nowhere to go.
Nowhere except the stinking black water of the harbor.
One of the soldiers, a lean, athletic one, pulled ahead, raising his musket to his shoulder. Ren leaped into the sea, hearing the bullet whiz over his head.
With a loud sploosh, the water closed over him. He fought to get to the surface, flailing wildly. When he reached it, though, he almost wished he hadn’t. Three soldiers were pointing guns at him, and looked like they intended to use them.
There were three loud cracks, and Ren cringed, expecting to feel the bullets smashing into his chest. But they didn’t. He looked up to see the soldiers clutching their injured hands, their unfired muskets on the ground beside them.
What happened? thought Ren. The soldiers were pushed out of the way as a man with a long beard and a green robe pulled him out of the water with a grip as strong as a lion’s. The man, judging by his appearance was an alchemist, maybe a doctor. “Come on! We must hurry! These soldiers will recover and call for reinforcements very soon.” Ren had no choice but to follow the alchemist through the crowds of people, hoping that wherever he was going, it was somewhere safe.
The alchemist stopped in front of a small three-masted ship moored at an out-of-the-way corner of the dock.
“Vushtek!” came a cry from on board. “You found him!”
“Yes, and I’m being pursued. Let me up, quick!”
A head poked over the rail. It was the man from the alley. “If they catch up to you, they’ll be sorry they messed with the crew of Octavio Pye. Tzil? Niria? I need a wind.”
Ren dimly noticed a man in blue and white clothing raising a hand, and a strong breeze blowing across the waterfront. A weatherweaver, he thought, but he wasn’t surprised. His head was reeling from hearing the name of Octavio Pye. Octavio Pye! The dreaded Captain Krakeneater of the pirate ship Sea Roc!!!
When Ren came fully to his senses, he was lying on a berth in a ship that rolled alarmingly beneath him. It took him a few minutes to remember where he was and what had happened, and he would have gladly slipped back into unconsciousness and forgotten all about it again. He groaned, and almost wished that the soldiers had caught him. What they would do to him couldn’t be much worse than what was going to happen to him now, he thought. But then again, he was still alive, and he wouldn’t be if the pirates hadn’t saved him.
The door opened and a boy came in. He was perhaps two years older than Ren and carrying a pile of clothes. “You’re awake,” he said with obvious surprise.
“Yes.” And I wish I wasn’t, he added silently.
“I brought you some dry clothes,” said the older boy. “And when you’re dressed, Captain Pye would like a word with you.” And he left.
Ren slowly dressed in the brown cotton shirt and maroon breeches the boy had brought him. Slipping his feet into his damp sandals, he stumbled out of the cabin and onto the main deck of the ship. All around him, men were working, in the rigging and on the deck. Over in a corner, the boy who had brought him the clothes silently scrubbed the wooden deck, every once in a while being kicked by a man in a long cerulean robe and striped pantaloon. Ren walked over to the side of the ship and looked out into the cool, clear waters. The splash of the waves that hit the ship and the caw of the seagulls all seemed to mock him. I wish I were back home in Hermetopolis, thought Ren.
“Ah, there you are,” said a voice.
Ren spun around and found himself face to face with Octavio Pye. “I want to get off,” he said flatly.
“I think we had better talk about this in my cabin,” said the captain, and steered Ren down below.
“I want to get off,” Ren repeated when they were in the captain’s cabin. “I want to go home.”
“You have no home, if I am correct in my guessing. In Hermetopolis, you were on the run from the law. You were about to be killed.”
Ren could not deny this, though he wanted to.
“I need…” an odd pause “…a powder monkey,” said Captain Pye. “You need safety. Is it a deal?”
Ren closed his eyes, and nearly shook his head, when the full truth came home to him. He paused, reliving the moment of his uncle’s death. He opened his eyes.
“It’s a deal.”
“Good, then. Report to me tomorrow morning at three bells. I will give you your duties then. For today, explore the ship! Learn everything you can today, because we really cannot afford failure.”
Ren gulped. Will they punish me? What kind of punishments? he thought. He’d heard of pirates and how they hurt and killed their prisoners. They’d walk the planks, get flogged, or even be shot! Ren was not sure if he was considered a prisoner, but after seeing the way that cabin boy was treated on the deck, he had decided that the pirates were harsher even than the stories implied.
“Aye aye, sir…er, captain,” Ren quickly said. He spun around, and ran back out to the main deck, trying to get as far away from Captain Pye as possible.
“Ren!” said Captain Pye.
Ren stopped, terrified, and turned around. “Yes, sir?”
“Are you frightened of me?”
“Yes, sir,” said Ren woodenly.
“You needn’t be.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Stop!” said Octavio Pye. “You’ve nothing to fear. I’m not going to hurt you.”
“Yes, sir.”
The captain put his head in his hands and sighed. Then he took off his hat, and Ren saw that he was completely bald, though he couldn’t have been more than a few years over fifty. “Why are you frightened of me? Sure, we’re pirates. But we don’t hurt people if there’s no reason.”
“You’re a pirate, sir. You just said you couldn’t afford failure, and I saw the cabin boy being beaten just now-”
“What!”
“He was being beaten, sir, while he scrubbed the deck.”
“Not Arn?”
“I don’t know who he was.”
“Fair hair?”
Ren nodded.
“They won’t stop picking on him, will they?” muttered Pye. He replaced his hat and rushed onto the deck. Ren sat with wobbly knees and a stomach turned to jelly, and recovered from his fear.
Captain Pye walked over to where Tam Eizid was sitting, curled miserably into a fetal position. The other man was no longer there.
“Tam,†he said sternly.
“Yes?†asked Tam, raising his head.
“You’ve got to stop.â€
“I wasn’t doing anything, sir.â€
“You’re letting them walk all over you. You put on airs, and they hate you for it. You’re a cabin boy now, and you have been for years. You can’t act better than them, or they’ll do this to you. And if you must continue with your pretentious habits, at least learn to defend yourself.â€
Tam nodded miserably.
“You go and attend to your own duties. And find Arn while you’re at it. He’s probably asleep in the sun somewhere.â€Ren wandered about waiting for something to happen so he could stop waiting for nothing. As he walked, a small figure (if you could call it that) rushed across the deck. It resembled a small, winged dragon with ivory scales and golden pinions. It made a noise similar to a caterwaul, then transformed into a skinny, cream-furred kitten that dashed around the corner of a cabin and out of sight.
A Pukis! thought Ren. One of the fiercely protective dragon-cats from the Free Island of Lithuslov!
But what was a Pukis doing here aboard the Sea Roc? He’d thought they only lived on the Free Isles. He’d never heard of one on a ship before. He followed the Pukis around the corner, and then down a hatch, but it was gone. Ren looked around and then saw a flash of ivory scales and followed the Pukis through a small trapdoor halfway covered by a barrel of apples. Without thinking, Ren hopped down through the hole in the floor and found Captain Pye leaning over a desk. The Pukis flew up onto the pirate’s shoulder and perched itself there, before transforming back into a kitten.“Well, hi there, Marmalade! How’s it going? Is everyone behaving?†the captain asked the Pukis.
Marmalade purred and pointed towards Ren.
The captain turned around in his chair to see what Marmalade was gesturing towards. When he saw Ren, his face grew red with anger, and then it turned back to its normal pigment, as he calmed down and grew an almost embarrassed, expression.
“Well, you’ve found my treasure hut. I guess you’ll be questioning me from now on unless I tell you. So sit down, and I will tell you all,†said Captain Pye, gesturing towards a small stool in the corner.
Ren did not understand a single thing that was going on, so, seeing as he had no other choice, he sat uncomfortably on the wooden stool. The wood was poorly cut, and had severe water damage. When he shifted his position on the stool, a faint creaking sound emerged from the legs. There were four of them, and they were quite thin and taking on a green tinge. Ren sat on his hands, as he usually did when he was uncomfortable, but vetoed that idea soon after he tried it, as the wood was so rough. Little splinters of wood stuck to his hands, and he tried to inconspicuously pick the slivers out of his skin. Captain Pye looked at him strangely, so he put his hands in his lap and focused all of his attention on the Captain.
“I will tell you all about our plan,†the captain went on. “We’ve been collecting treasure of all kinds from merchant ships, naval ships, and even those two-timing privateers. Eventually, we hope to get enough so that we can set ourselves up in society as respectable people. Then-†he grinned sardonically- “we can stop bringing society down from the outside, and start bringing society down from the inside. Sanguiz IX won’t last forever, and he has twelve children. The eldest ones are triplets. While they’re fighting over the throne, we can probably carve out a good-sized chunk of Sphaere for ourselves, where people can live without being bled dry by taxes or getting shot for speaking the truth. Money always helps- bribing public officials can get you anywhere if the price is high enough. And then, when we’ve got a proper country-colony-whatchacallit, with its own army and Alchemist Corps, we’ll take over Sphaere, and hand it over to the people.â€
“So you’re like good pirates, then, right?†Ren asked timidly.
“Well, sort of. We have a good cause, I suppose, but I have no illusions. We have killed people and we have robbed ships, and we will continue to do so until we have finished what we started out to do. Come into my cabin, I have something to show you.â€
In the cabin, Captain Pye started looking in his numerous dressers and drawers, and under papers around his desk. Finally, he found what he was looking for and exclaimed,†Here we are!â€
He pulled out a golden sphere, with all of the known lands in Sphaere on it. From inside, Ren noticed, came a faint red glow. The golden globe made Ren shiver. It seemed as if a whole power came from inside the sphere, and it beckoned faintly for Ren to use the power.
“Inside this globe, know as the Orb of Centaur, is a power stronger than every military member of the Sanguiz Empire Army, combined,†said the captain. “There are only two people who can control it. And now, I have both of them on my ship.â€
“Who?†asked Ren.
“Well, one of them is Tam Eizid. The cabin boy you saw being beaten. The other one…†he paused. “Well, the other one is you.â€
Ren was too stunned to answer. Captain Pye continued. “There are four essential elements in Sphaere, and talented people can work with any of them. Alchemists work with earth. They are very common; in fact people who do not have alchemical talent are rare. Stormmaster is a generic term for weatherweavers, who work air, and waveworkers, who work water. The fourth class is so rare that it doesn’t even have a name. They work with fire. You and Tam are of that kind.â€
He picked up the orb again. “This, of course, isn’t the real orb, just a replica made alchemically from our best knowledge of its appearance. The real orb is in a steel strongbox in a locked compartment aboard the 200-gun flagship of the Sanguiz Navy, the Blood Storm.â€
“Oh,†said Ren, wondering what that odd mix of disappointment and elation and shock was called, if it even had a name. “Does the other boy know? Tam?â€
“He hasn’t the faintest idea. And I don’t intend to tell him yet, either.†The Captain walked out of the cabin, and Ren followed, hearing the wood groan beneath his feet. Ren walked over to the edge of the boat and looked down at the water splashing against the side of the boat. Captain Pye was pacing near the door of his cabin. Ren looked closely at his hat – Octavio Pye was famous for his large tricorn hat. Ren looked back out on the water, and saw that it was turning a darker color. Little ripples began appearing on the surface of the navy water, and Ren knew a storm was coming. He walked over to the Captain to tell him about the weather, but it seemed that Pye already knew. His head was tilted slightly upward, and his nose was working over-time trying to figure out where the storm was coming from, and where it was headed. Captain Pye’s strongest sense was his nose, at least when it came to detecting storms.
Captain Pye stared at Ren. He tugged on the brim of his hat. He sniffed again. And then he said those terrible words, “It’s coming from the South.â€
“Tzil! Niria! I need you on deck!†bellowed the Captain. “We have to quell the storm!â€
A man in blue and white clothing rushed up to them, followed by a young woman of about twenty years. “We’ll do our best, Captain,†said the woman, “but there’s something wrong about these waves…â€
Tzil licked his finger and raised it up. Small strands of lightning seemed to crackle across the tip. “Niria’s right,†he said urgently. “This is a made storm.â€
“Can you quell it?†the captain asked.
“Well… together, Niria and I are a match for any lone stormmaster on the Inner Sea, but this one must have been sent by a confederation of twenty, possibly more. We need to find a safe harbor, and fast.â€
The captain considered for a moment, and then began barking orders. “All sails up, crew! Niria, make sure the waves don’t swamp us. Tzil, keep the wind to a moderate level so the canvas doesn’t burst. We’re going to ride this storm out until we can reach the isle of Lithuslov.â€
Ren stood still as confusion immediately fell upon the ship, and the crew ran every-which-way, not sure what they were supposed to be doing. He wondered where Lithuslov was.
Then he had an idea. He ran up to the captain. “Sir, could I help the weatherweavers? You said I had talent.â€
“Not that kind. Fire talent. But you can ask them.â€
Ren trotted up to Tzil and Niria, standing with closed eyes in the middle of the hustle and bustle. “Could I help?†he asked, reluctant to disturb them.
Niria opened her eyes. She closed them, and opened them again. “Tzil. Look!†she said softly. Tzil opened his eyes.
“Did you want to help?â€
Ren nodded. “Can I?â€
“Not with this, but you have power.†And he closed his eyes again. Niria shrugged at Ren and went back to muttering spells.
Ren stood on the swaying deck, wishing he could be happy about “having powerâ€, but knowing it was no good.
The storm blew out of the south with unbelievable fury and suddenness. Massive towers of cloud piled up in the sky, crowned by lightning. A colossal wave rode the sea before it, driven by the mad wind. The Sea Roc was lifted up by the wave and flung through the air like a toy. Tzil and Niria rose into the air, wreathed in glittering chains of electricity. Ren managed to grab hold of a bulwark and prevent himself from being swept away. Tam Eizid was not so lucky. The older boy was smashed off the deck by a freezing, gray plume of water. Several seabirds rode its crest, screaming triumphantly.
“Stormy petrels,†Captain Pye muttered. Then he shouted, “Throw Tam a line!†Another wave broke over the deck, making him cough and splutter. He knew the chances of saving Tam were virtually nil, but he had to try.
“It’s no good, Captain,†Tzil said. His voice rang like a bell through the clamor of the storm, even though he didn’t raise his voice. “I recognized those petrels. One of them had a scar above its eye.â€
“How does a petrel get a scar like that??â€
“I put it there. Those aren’t petrels, they’re wave spirits, and they’re in the service of Rake Vashkar, weatherweaver of the Blood Storm.â€
Soon the storm began to clear, leaving with the petrels. Captain Pye went down below, and the crew hurried around, trying to clean up the mess left by the storm. Ren stood on the deck, shocked and sad. He had never even got a chance to meet Tam properly, and now he was dead- or captured by the Sanguiz Empire.
Tzil and Niria were asleep down below, tired out by their efforts to quell the storm. Captain Pye was doing who knows what in his cabin. Ren was all alone.Tam kept his head above water for as long as he could, and eventually the storm quieted. He floated on his back, watching petrels that shouldn’t be there flying above him. Every now and then one would seem to lose shape for a moment, only to resume the form of a petrel a little later. Tam’s head swam, and he realized his limbs were all numb. He wouldn’t survive much longer in this cold.
Then a ship loomed above him. Tam gave a weak yell and attempted to swim out of the way. His frozen legs would hardly obey him. Someone on the ship shouted something, and then down came a rope, whistling through the air from the very high deck of the ship. Tam grabbed it, and was hauled up onto the ship.
“What is it?†asked a voice, accompanied by hurried footsteps.
“Found a boy in the water, sir. ‘E’s half dead.â€
“A boy? Really?†The voice seemed much too interested, and not in a good way. “Where do you imagine he came from?â€
“I don’t know, sir. But he looks like pirate-kind to me.â€
“A pirate! Ah! Bring him to my cabin!â€
“Yes, Mr. Vashkar, sir,†said the seaman, and then Tam lost his senses, and heard no more.Ren leaned over the edge of the boat, watching the waves from the storm get smaller and smaller; only creating small splashes now. He heard a shout, and turned around suddenly, almost tangling himself in a net crumpled up by his feet. Someone was standing at the stern of the boat, shouting.
“What in the name of -†Captain Pye stormed out of his cabin, but was stopped mid-step when he saw what was going on.
The ship’s Pukis, Marmalade, stood on the deck in dragon form, hissing furiously and spitting fire. Across from it lay a petrel, wounded and unable to walk or change shape.
Tzil walked over to the petrel-spirit that was lying on the deck. He kicked Marmalade to the side, cursing under his breath. Marmalade spat a small ball of fire at him, then turned back into a kitten and ran over to Captain Pye.
Tzil examined the petrel-spirit, noticing it had a red feather on its right wing, and a scar right above its left eye. “Letor,†whispered Tzil. “Letor! Wake up, I command you!â€
The petrel-spirit, Letor, woke up, coughed, and glared at the weatherweaver standing over him.
“Where are they?†Tzil demanded, seizing Letor by one wing. He shook the bird, which grunted in a decidedly un-birdlike way. Letor squinted, trying to turn into a coyote or something that could nip Tzil, but he couldn’t. He was too exhausted.
Tzil shook him again. “Where are they taking Tam?â€
Letor feigned a puzzled look.
“I know they have him,†spat Tzil. “That’s why Vashkar sent the storm. He’s tried it before. Now where are they taking him?â€
Letor laughed wearily. “I’ll never tell you.â€
“Niria!†Tzil called. “Grab the matches. We’re having wave-spirit for dinner tonight!â€
“Fine, fine! I’ll tell you!†exclaimed Letor, fearing for his life. “They are going to Helean City, where Mordran is preparing for the fight of all Sphaere!â€
“Who’s Mordran?†piped up Ren.
“The Emperor’s Commander-in-chief,†replied Captain Pye.
“Do they have any idea of his powers?†Tzil continued his interrogation.
“No,†gasped Letor. “What powers?â€
“Then why do they want him?â€
“Bait. He’s a favorite of yours, isn’t he, Captain? You won’t just let him die.â€
“But we still have the advantage,†said the captain under his breath.
How wrong he was.
Even Tzil had no idea what good liars wave spirits were.Tam woke in a dark room. It was a few minutes before he realized that his hands were tied to the sides of the hard, wooden chair he was sitting on. An alchemical lamp, a crystal globe filled with phlogiston, shone blindingly into his face. As a result, the features of the man sitting across from him were unclear. The voice, however, was anything but. It cut through his throbbing head like a knife.
“Hello, Tam Eizid.â€
“Who are you?†Tam rasped. “How do you know my name?â€
“My faithful spirits have been following the Sea Roc for several weeks. The only reason we haven’t attacked it is that we didn’t want to damage you.â€
“Why the heck am I so important?â€
“Tell me, Tam. Are you happy aboard the Sea Roc?â€
“Well, Captain’s pretty strict, and I don’t have the best position, but it’s better than the life I left behind…â€
“I could get you a job aboard the Blood Storm. Any position, even first mate. Wages of up to ten aurums a day, luxurious lodgings- oh, anything you desire.â€
Tam snorted. It sounded like a good deal, but these things always did at first, and he wasn’t sure he trusted this silver-tongued stranger. “What’s the catch?â€
“We want you to do us a favor.â€
“What is that?â€
The man reached into a deep pocket and pulled out a small, golden globe, engraved with images of all the lands of Sphaere. It gleamed in the light from the phlogiston lamp, but also seemed to produce a more subtle light from within.
“We want you to use this in the service of Emperor Sanguinus IX.â€
“Ah…†said Tam. He didn’t know if he should accept the offer. Something sounded fishy about this man and all he had to offer. “Can I think about it?†he asked.
“Sure, sure… take as much time as you want…just remember the Blood Storm is waiting for you.†And with that the man stood and left the cabin.
Tam rested his head against the surprisingly hard wooden wall. It looked brand new, unlike the wood of the Sea Roc, which still held up well, but was starting to show signs of weathering, and always seemed damp. He did not trust the strange man, however intriguing his offer was. Something about his spirit and the Sea Roc…and the emperor.
Two years ago, Tam had stowed away on an exploring ship, heading out of Sphaere. Halfway across the Inner Sea, the Sea Roc had attacked them. Tam, who had remained hidden for weeks, was discovered by the first mate. Given the choice between death and a job aboard the pirate ship, Tam chose the obvious. He was made cabin boy, but was strangely unused to work, and that along with his haughty manner had set the crew against him. But the pirates, even Octavio Pye, knew nothing of his past. Tam had managed to mostly forget it himself, too, and that was all that mattered.
Tam had been trained, in those two years, never to trust the emperor or any of his minions. Which was why he was reluctant to take the offer. But what would happen if he refused?
Ren leaned heavily against the rail, watching the sun set, and asked the captain a question that had been floating around in his mind.
“How did you know that Tam and I were the ones with the fire power stuff?â€
“That is an interesting question. We found out from a captured fortuneteller on our ship. The man had a vision in which he saw your face, and luckily he was good at sketching likenesses. It was pure luck that we found you the way we did, however. We knew you were in Hermetopolis, but we’d expected something a bit quieter than what actually happened.â€
“What happened to the fortuneteller?â€
“Oh, him? We made him walk the plank. Niria found him sneaking around the ship with a dagger one night. She cornered him and found out he was trying to kill me, although why is a mystery I will never find the answer to.
“Now Tam, he was harder to figure it out. By the time we’d got the fortuneteller, we knew he was one of the Powerful, but it took us a while to figure it out. Tam had served aboard our ship for a whole year before we learned his secret. Not even he knew he was a Powerful. It was in his actions. When we first captured him, er, hired him, we noticed that Marmalade took a sudden liking to him, which was very strange. Other times, when we he was swabbing the deck for example, swarms of fish would surround our ship and one time, during a fierce sea storm, a dolphin even appeared and did a flip in the air, before diving back underwater. But the thing that really gave him away was when he entered my cabin one day, looking very upset and all of the candles went out.â€
“Does Tam know he is a Powerful?†Ren asked.
“No, not yet. And now he might not ever,†said the captain, a faraway look in his eyes.
“Why did you tell me but not Tam?â€
“Because you stumbled on the treasure room and he didn’t. And…I’m not really sure about Tam.â€
“What do you mean?â€
Octavio hesitated. “I can’t really place my finger on it, you know. The whole situation just makes me uneasy. I suppose because he won’t tell us anything about his past, for one. Although it’s none of by business, none of my business at all. And yet it’s always nagging at him, you can tell. Something certainly is. And when he first came on board… he talked in his sleep. He was terrified of everything. He seemed to be afraid of us, or someone, ‘finding him out’, as he put it.â€
Ren pondered this. This certainly was an odd business, and somehow he couldn’t wrap his head around it all. It had all happened so fast, to think, only that same day, there had been a pounding on the door, and then he had watched, horrified, as the soldiers had killed Perlan Ethor. Only today. And now he had a new power, a new life, new acquaintances.
The storm had calmed long ago, and the Sea Roc was drifting slowly in a gentle breeze. The horizon was featureless except for a purple-gray blur to the north.
“What is that?†Ren inquired.
Pye followed his gaze. “The isle of Lithuslov. We’ll stop there for now. Who knows what sort of weather Rake Vashkar is sending towards us. We’ll be able to survive a storm better if we’re in a harbor.â€
“But Lithuslov is uninhabited.â€
“Huh. That’s what the Empire would like you to think. There used to be a small village of Pukis trappers-â€
Marmalade hissed, interrupting him. Pye glared at the Pukis, then continued.
“-which is now a thriving free port, the biggest in the six Free Isles.â€
“Will they have food?†Ren asked. He was suddenly ravenous.
“Food?†repeated the captain. “Food as you have never seen before, Ren. The wealthy have skreeth egg omelets and orange punch for breakfast. Of course,†he added at Ren’s awed expression, “we’ll probably be eating stale bread and drinking sour beer at some moldy old inn, but one can still dream.â€
“Oh.†Ren stared disappointed out at the dark waves. “How do you know what the wealthy eat, anyway?â€
“I wasn’t always a rebel, you know. Once I was the honored captain of His Imperial Majesty’s good ship Harmony. I had many a good meal in that time. But when Sanguinus killed my brother, I became a pirate. For vengeance. Or at least it was then. Now, I’m not so sure.â€â€œHello!†called an imperious -and female- voice. “Vashkar! Are you in there?â€
Tam said nothing, but tried to remember if he had ever heard the name Vashkar before.
“Vashkar!†repeated the voice. “I want to go swimming. You must warm up the water for me.†When there was still no reply, the owner of the voice marched into the cabin. “It’s awfully dark in here,†she complained, and a light flared up.
“Oh!†said the girl. She was about Tam’s age, with brown hair down to her lower back, and her features were ominously familiar. The emperor’s features, but softer and more girlish.
The light went out.
“Who are you?†Tam said as the light flared back into life a moment later.
“I could ask the same to you,†the girl hissed. “What are you doing in here? It’s PRIVATE. So leave.†She put her hands on her hips and looked much like Marmalade when she was disturbed from her rest.
“I’m in here because some weird guy told me to be. And you?â€
“I’m here to keep all these stupid men in check and to stop them from caring for stowaways,†she snapped. “In other words, you.â€
“I’m not a stowaway!†said Tam hotly. “I’m a cabin boy!â€
“We already have fifteen of them. We don’t need another.â€
“I’m not a cabin boy here. On my ship.â€
“Well then, what are you doing here?â€
“I was washed overboard and this ship picked me up. Now leave me alone.†Tam turned his back on her.
“What’s your ship’s name?†asked the girl.
“Why should I tell you?â€
“Because I am your superior. I am the fourth child of Emperor Sanguinus IX.â€
“Even less reason to tell you!†Tam shot back before he could stop himself. “Now leave me alone, for the last time.â€
“Even less…†mused the fourth child of Emperor Sanguinus IX. She looked at Tam suspiciously. “Who are you, exactly?â€
“Tam Eizid, cabin boy.â€
The imperial girl chewed one her long fingernails. As Tam was wondering how they stayed so long if she bit them, it grew a quarter of an inch. She saw him staring.
“I have alchemical talent.†It was most definitely a boast. It also seemed to get her off the track of wondering who he was. She held out her hand, and Tam took it gingerly. “I’m Tera,†she said.
“Hello, Tera,†said Tam, feeling slightly more confident. That was shattered as she added, “You, of course, will call me Princess.â€
The man who had been interrogating Tam walked in, his expression blank. “I’ve done it, Princess. The water around the ship is warmed up,†he said obsequiously. However, as he executed a slight bow, a sneer of utter contempt flickered across his face. It said: I know you are currently my superior, but when the tables are turned, you will have to watch out.
“Good,†said Tera and left without so much as a thank you.
The man – Vashkar – turned to Tam with a sigh. “And how do you like Her Imperial Highness?â€
Tam shook his head. “I don’t want the orb, and I don’t want this stupid power. This is worse than the Sea Roc. This is worse than what came before…†A lone tear traced its way down his cheek, and the candles guttered.
“You are tired,†said Vashkar suavely. “You will no doubt feel differently after a rest. Come, I will lead you to your cabin.†Tam let himself be led like a child to a soft berth, where he immediately fell into a deep and welcome slumber.
Ren watched the strange island growing closer and closer. It was abundant with trees and he saw a gigantic flame in the center of the island, glowing against the darkening sky.
“Captain,†Ren asked. “Why is there an enormous fire on the island?â€
“Aye, that is part of their survival,†the Captain answered. Ren gave him a surprised look.
“The Pukises are beings of flame,†Pye continued. “Just as wave spirits are beings of water. Then there are the orti and trosses, which are spirits of earth and air respectively. That flame is a Pukis nesting ground. The kittens are much more fiery when they hatch. Sort of the same as a baby rattlesnake is more poisonous than its parents, because it doesn’t have fine control over its poison glands.â€
“Oh,†said Ren, and went back to staring at that flickering beacon on the isle. “So they’re fire creatures, like me and Tam. That’s why Marmalade took a liking to him.â€
The Captain nodded.
Ren mused silently for a long while. Finally he said, “Two is an even number, you know.â€
“Yes,†agreed Octavio Pye. “What are you getting at?â€
“In all the old stories, odd numbers are magical, and even numbers are ordinary. Everyone knows that. So why are there only two with fire talent?â€
Captain Pye sighed. “There were more of them once, the fortune-teller said. But they all died in a dreadful fire hundreds of years ago. Only a few people escaped who carried the gift, and their grandchildren’s grandchildren passed it on. But often a child or even an adult would get to near a fire, that shouldn’t have hurt them, but they would burn to death.â€
“Why would they burn?†asked Ren, thinking of the myriad burns he had received standing to close to the fire, and the time he had almost died of a dreadful fever when he was six. A fever was a fire, of a sort.
“Don’t you know?†replied the Captain, surprised. “All those who have talent, of any kind, can only be killed by that element, and steel, such as knives and swords. That is why there were so few with water power after the Deluge. Only those with fire power seem to be more susceptible than others.â€
“Still, might it be possible that there’s another?†Ren said wistfully.
Captain Pye snorted. “Well, that would be a funny story. Here I was thinking that I’ve got the only two in existence and then there’s another? Pfft. One in a million. No, one in a billion. Sorry boy, but with how common fires are nowadays, there’s no chance that there’s another one like you out there.â€
“And Tam’s probably been burned at the stake right now.â€
“If he’s lucky.â€
“What do you mean, Captain?â€
“The Blood Storm’s crew may be vile and cruel, but they’re not stupid. If they figure out what power Tam’s got he’ll wish he’d been dead.â€
“You mean they’ll torture him?â€
“Probably, if he doesn’t do what they want. If he does do what they want, it may be like torture.â€
“What do you mean?â€
“According to all the sources of information on the Orb of Centaur, it’s a very exhausting thing to use. And the Empire won’t be letting him rest all that often. They’ll be after you, too, when Tam’s not able to work it anymore.â€
“You mean… dead?†Ren faltered. The Captain did not answer, but his silence seemed to confirm it.
“Well then, we have to rescue him!†cried Ren. This was not mere heroism; it was the longing for another one like him, to be less alone.
“Certainly we do,†said the Captain. “And we will. But for now, they don’t know of his powers. He’s just bait for me. He won’t have the best time of it, but he won’t be tortured yet, either. And in the meantime, we lack fresh fruit. We have to have some, before the crew dies of scurvy. When we’ve refreshed ourselves at Lithuslov, then we can rescue Tam.â€The next morning they sailed into Pukislyn, the biggest Free Port inside or outside of Sphaere. The Sea Roc dropped anchor in the harbor and most of the crew rowed to the quay. Ren, Niria, and Captain Pye were among the people in the longboats. Tzil stayed behind with the watch to make sure Letor didn’t escape.
The city was twice as busy as Hermetopolis, and nearly everyone was accompanied by a Pukis. Those that weren’t were wearing beautiful coats ranging in color from ivory touched with gold to a deep, fiery red, and it didn’t take a genius to deduce why these people didn’t have Pukises riding on their shoulders. Obviously the Pukis fur trade was not as diminished as Captain Pye would like to think.
Marmalade dove and leapt through the crowd, touching noses with every other Pukis she met. In her excitement she couldn’t quite decide which form to stay in, so she was switching from dragon to kitten and back again every instant.
Ren laughed, because in watching the small creature twirl and dance he could, for a moment, forget about his often-annoying power.
Unfortunately, the feeling didn’t last long.
While Ren laughed at Marmalade, he felt a weight settle on his shoulder. His mirth ceased abruptly. He looked up. A gold-orange Pukis sat there, in dragon form. A slight pressure against his legs made him look down, to see a trio of Pukises in cat form, two ivory and one flame-blue, rubbing against his ankles. “Oh, no,†he heard Captain Pye say, but the arrival of another of the creatures on his other shoulder, and one on his head, made it rather difficult to pay any attention to the world around him.
When every available place on Ren had been filled, the fire beings had to settle for trotting as close to him as possible, or flying around him. He couldn’t move a muscle. There was a brief scuffle on his head as Marmalade claimed her rightful throne. He knew the whole crowd was staring, though he couldn’t see past the sea of kittens and dragons.
He could hear Captain Pye muttering curses, and Niria trying to disturb the Pukises with her water magic, and hostile mutterings from the crowd, and then a child shrieking, “Nina, Nina!†and his left shoulder became a little lighter for a moment, as the child pried a Pukis off it. But not for long. The Pukis, Nina, dug her claws deep into his shoulder, and he yelped in pain. “Go on, Nina!†he cried, but not really aloud, only in his head. With a purr that sounded almost like speech, the Pukis released her claws and let herself be cuddled by the little girl, who was staring at Ren as though he was some sort of- Pukis-napper.
But now Ren knew how to get them to leave him alone. He thought hard at them to leave, and one by one, they flew off, until Ren was left with the flame-blue one on one shoulder and Marmalade on the other.
Marmalade fluttered over to Captain Pye after a few minutes, leaving only the flame-blue one on his left shoulder. It refused to leave.
Come on! he silently pleaded, but the Pukis would not leave. Ren caught sight of a portly man with a Pukis-pelt scarf making his way towards them. He was holding an empty cage of what looked like solid water, made by a waveworker. The Pukis seemed to notice the man too, because it dug its claws deeper into Ren’s flesh.
Ah, so that’s how it is, Ren thought at the Pukis. Don’t worry; I’ll get you out of here.
The man with the Pukis-pelt scarf came towards Ren, who was watching him intently. Captain Pye seemed to be watching Ren, wondering what his next action was.
“Come here, Pooky, Pooky,†cooed the trapper. “Here girl.â€
The Pukis hissed and turned into its cat form.
The trapper looked at Ren. “Here, little boy. Bring her to me! She’s mine ya know!†the trapper said.
“No!†Ren yelled. His body was hot and tense. He was trembling with anger, and another, more overpowering sense of fear that he was almost positive was coming from the Pukis. Ren took off running. He heard the shouts of the trapper, Niria, and Captain Pye behind him, but he would not stop. He ran past people of every race and every size. Many of them passed him without noticing. He looked over his shoulder and saw the man running after him. The trapper was getting closer and closer. Ren could barely run anymore. He was about to collapse. The Pukis’ claws were digging hard into his shoulder. One thought came to his mind: flamulo podias. Ren had no idea where that thought came from, or what it meant, but he suddenly stopped running. He turned around and the man was looking at his feet. They were on fire, but Ren felt no pain.
Ren watched the fire fearfully as it licked his ankles. The Pukis hissed alternately at the flames and the trapper, who was staring frozen at Ren’s feet. Ren recalled the captain’s words: “Those with fire power seem to be more susceptible than others.†The little conflagration was gaining power, and now it was halfway up his calves. And now it hurt. Time seemed not to exist as he watched his lower body be consumed in fire.
Then the Pukis on his shoulder sprang into action. She scrambled down his shirt and puckered her lips, switching to dragon form as she did so. With a loud slurp, she inhaled the fire, ballooning out her cheeks. The trapper sprang away, but he wasn’t fast enough. With a loud sound like an alchemical explosion mixed with a massive belch, the Pukis spat a huge ball of bluish flame at her former master. The fat man’s fancy, white wig exploded into cinders, and he was left with a meager crop of thinning brown hair and several sooty marks on his face.
The Pukis shifted back into kitten form. Ren walked away with what he hoped was a jaunty, confident step, the soles of his feet screaming in pain as they touched his rough sandals.
As soon as he deemed the man far enough away, he sat down, pulled off his shoes, and examined his feet. They were badly blistered, but he might be able to make it back to the quay…if he could find it.
“Where is Captain Pye!?†Ren suddenly thought as he sat down with a thud. “I must have lost him in all the confusion. What on Sphaere am I going to do?â€
Suddenly a foreign thought touched his mind. He shrieked, leaping up and raising his fists in helpless self-defense, then wincing as his burned feet and ankles protested. The thought hit him again, and he drew a wary breath. Another small thought called out to him. “Who are you?†he snarled. Now that somebody had mastered mind touching, apparently, keeping his secret hidden from the empire would be more difficult than he thought.
However, the next thought felt not harsh and threatening, like he expected, but almost gentle. But really, who would want to be gentle if they could read minds?
A sound like a crackling flame seared through his head and the soles of his feet began to throb worse than before. “Aaaaaargh!†he yelled. In a second, the feeling passed, but when he opened his eyes there sat the Pukis from the marketplace, the blue one with the shiny orange eyes.
“Felt that, did you?†the voice purred, and finally Ren understood who the mysterious mind reader was.
“There is a water spirit in the vicinity,†the Pukis continued. “His essence chills me. I believe my old master is speaking with him. Over there!â€
The last thought switched from a gentle purr to a harsh yowl. Ren swiveled around just in time to overhear some of the conversation.
“…definitely had fire talent. Did you see how the Pukises were drawn to him?â€
“I did. Vashkar will be pleased. Mordran may even see fit to reward you.â€
The latter speaker was a mysterious figure in a blue cloak. Just as Ren tried to get closer, the figure exploded in a blast of freezing spray. A stormy petrel rose from the churning water and flew off to the East.
Ren felt as though his stomach was filled with sour milk. “They know,†he whispered.
“We have to get back to the Captain,-um- what should I call you?†said Ren.
“No need to be so loud,†thought the Pukis. “Call me…†Here it thought something unpronounceable.
“What!†Ren ejaculated, accidentally out loud. “Sorry,†he thought more quietly, “but I can’t possibly say that. Can I call you Alexis?â€
“I suppose,†the Pukis thought back. “Now, we must get you back to you Captain. I must lay my eggs soon, but first I have to get you to safety.â€
Ren knew he had to get back to Captain Pye, but how? Suddenly, a thought came to his mind from the Pukis. “Use your power. Back there, when you scared away my owner, you used some. Try it now.â€
“But how?†Ren asked.
“You mustn’t focus on using your powers yet. If you do that when you have no control, they will not work. Just let them come to you.†So Ren sat there at the bench, tending to his legs and watching the ships go by.
After about an hour, he stood up and glared at the Pukis. “This isn’t working!†he exclaimed.
“Be patient,†said the Pukis. “Later, you will learn how to use your powers in the here and now, but this is not the right time.â€
So Ren sulked for about another half hour, but finally a word came to his mind. Flamulo helioso, were the words. As if it were a reflex, Ren closed his eyes, and spread out his arms. He had no control over this, and when he tried to put his arms down, they sprung up again. He felt some heat on his arms, and when he finally opened his eyes, his arms were on fire. The Pukis was flying next to him. Ren looked down: they were a good 50 feet above the island. Ren saw the Sea Roc and then glanced over at the Pukis, which was flying with him. “Quick! Get over to the ship before you become susceptible to the fire and burn!â€
Ren flapped his arms and dove towards the ship like a falcon. When he got close to the ship, he slowed and landed with a thump on the deck. The fire on his arms sputtered and spat and then went out.
Captain Pye walked over to Ren and grabbed his shoulder. “What in Sphaere have you done, boy?â€
He then flew into a towering rage. Ren nodded at the appropriate times, but he couldn’t concentrate. His thoughts kept drifting off to join Alexis’s, and every time, she would prod him back into focusing on the Captain. Even so, he hardly heard a single word from Octavio Pye until the berating ceased abruptly.
“What?†asked Ren, startled out of his reverie.
“Your legs!†said Octavio Pye, aghast.
“What? Oh.†Ren looked down at his legs. His pants were burnt up to the knee, and what of his legs was visible was blistered. “It doesn’t hurt that much,†he lied.
“Go to your hammock right now!†the Captain commanded, fiercely staring Ren down. “Even fire WOUNDS can be dangerous to you. I believe they take you down from the inside.â€
Ren obediently walked to his hammock and lay down in it. Now that he thought about it, he hadn’t actually slept on it much. He lay his head down and began to doze off.
“Wake up, boy!†the voice of Octavio Pye said, searing through Ren’s groggy head. “Now, I want you to tell me exactly what happened to you. Don’t leave anything out. And I’m especially interested in learning how you came upon THIS.†With his last word he yanked the furry figure of Alexis from behind his back and waved her in front of Ren’s face. “Do you want Marmalade to be so jealous that she burns our entire ship into the sea?â€
“Marmalade would do that!†Ren was shocked.
“She most certainly would,†said Captain Pye grimly. “She’s had a hand in sinking most of the ships we ever pirated, and she could certainly sink this one.â€
Alexis sank her teeth into Captain Pye’s hand and jumped onto Ren’s bed.
“Alright,†said Ren slowly. “I’ll tell you the whole story.†And so he did, starting with the Pukis trapper, and ending with the fact that he could speak to Alexis.
“That’s very well and good, Ren,†said Octavio, “but if you’re going to use your powers, you need to use them with good judgment. A fire powerful carries more magic than an alchemist or a stormmaster could hold, and if it’s misused you could virtually destroy Sphaere, or the Inner Sea at the very least.â€
Ren stared, incredulous. Suddenly his head snapped back with a jerk. Alexis looked into his eyes innocently.
“Sheesh, get a grip on yourself,†she thought calmly, only half joking. “You need to stop acting so surprised every 3 seconds when you learn about yet another of your powers. Considering how many more there are to come…â€
“What!?†Ren said, shocked. “I have more?â€
“What’s wrong, Ren?†the Captain asked worriedly.
“Nothing.â€
“Are you sure?†For some reason the Captain was suddenly very concerned. “You’re talking to yourself.â€
“I’m talking to Alexis,†said Ren.
“Ah. About Alexis. We’re going to have to work something out with her and Marmalade. I understand that she’ll have to stay on the ship, but I’d rather not end up in the sea with a blackened hull for a ship.â€
Captain Pye stood up and walked out of the cabin, going to find Marmalade. Alexis followed, and Ren was alone. Or so he thought. He flopped back on the hammock, and once again his thoughts turned to Tam Eizid, that unknown personality. How he wanted to share his wonder with someone! So much new power, and only one other person could have any idea what it was like.
He heard a rush of wind, and a very small, bright fire appeared a few feet away, hovering less than half an inch above the floor. “Did I start it?†he asked himself. Perhaps this was the beginning of the end. Maybe he had misused his power already, and Sphaere was doomed.
The fire grew bigger and bigger, and Ren, with a nightmare passivity, watched it grow larger, closer, brighter. Soon it would reach his hammock, and then him and – Ren couldn’t think about that. He closed his eyes tightly. Nothing happened, but an odd sensation came over him. He tried to cry out and failed. He opened his eyes to see images moving around him and heard voices. The images cleared away, and he was standing on a gray ship. No one took notice of him except for a boy swabbing the decks next to him. “I know you,†the boy muttered to himself. “Who…Ren?â€
Ren suddenly knew who the boy was. “Tam,†he breathed.Captain Pye found Ren lying on the floor next to his hammock. He was asleep or in a trance, and appeared to be holding a conversation with a voice unheard.
Rake Vashkar looked at Tam. He was kneeling on the deck, a holystone in his hand and a bucket by his side. But he wasn’t scrubbing the deck. He was talking.
“Where is this?†asked Ren.
“The Blood Storm,†replied Tam. “Well, not really. I’m not sure where we are. I was on the Blood Storm, a minute ago.â€
“Did you set something on fire?â€
“Me? No. Why?â€
Ren took a breath. “Did you know you have fire power, Tam?â€
“How do you know about that?â€
“Because I do too. I set my legs on fire. See?†He gestured to his blistered calves.
“Ouch,†said Tam sympathetically.
Ren frowned. Something had occurred to him. “You do know about your talent. Captain said you didn’t.â€
“The Blood Storm’s weatherweaver told me about it. He wants me to use some orb. He’s paying me an awful lot.â€
“Oh, no,†moaned Ren. But then the grayness that surrounded him and Tam closed in, bringing with it all the previous images. He cried out, and woke.As the gray mist faded and Tam came to himself, he found he was still sitting on the deck. His first thought was, what in Sphaere just happened?
His next thought was, I’m scrubbing the deck. What about all those fancy positions I was promised? But of course, he would only get a good position if he promise to work that orb. It was tempting, that was for sure.
Very tempting, in fact. Tam looked down at the holystone in his hand, and the vast expanse of deck that he was supposed to scrub. If he just accepted the offer, he would never have to do this again.
At any rate, what had the Empire ever done to harm him? Just because the pirates hated Sanguinus IX didn’t mean he had to. And what the Emperor did couldn’t be any worse than what the pirates did. Could it?
Never scrub the deck again… Any position, even first mate… Wages of up to ten aurums a day…
His mind was made up. Tam stood up purposefully and walked across the deck towards Rake Vashkar, who was talking angrily to a sunburned sailor. Tam summoned up his courage.
“I will use the Orb,” he said.Captain Pye’s face blurred into focus slowly, like water clearing after mud has been stirred up. “What happened, boy?” cried the Captain.
“They know!” Ren said urgently. “They’ve told him!”
“Told who? Who told him? Told him what?”
Ren sat up. “Vashkar told Tam, that he has fire powers. That means they know about it, which means that Tam isn’t safe no matter what he does.”
The Captain swore. “At least they don’t know about you.”
“Well, actually… ”
“WHAT, boy? Speak up.”
“That Pukis trapper told a disguised wave spirit that I had fire talent. The spirit mentioned Vashkar and Mordran.”
Pye cursed. Fumbling through his pockets, he pulled out an object that looked like a dried kraken tentacle. Gnawing convulsively on it, Captain Pye paced the deck, muttering “Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.”Ren said nothing. He could see that it was a much larger dilemma than he could comprehend.
“Why is this such a problem, sir?” Ren asked. “I mean, they won’t need me until Tam can’t…” he realized what he was saying and broke off, guiltily. “And I’m sure we’ll have rescued Tam before he can really do any harm,” he amended hastily.
“Well…” the Captain hesitated. “There are two things they might do. They may try to capture you now so that when Tam dies, you can take over immediately, or they may combine your powers and gamble on not needing you after you have done your work.”
“Combine our powers?”
“Yes. Your powers merged, and with the globe, will make you two more powerful than anyone in Sphaere, except for the Unknowables.”
The Unknowables? Ren thought. What are those? Ren wanted to ask, but knew it was not the right time. Perhaps, later he would.
The captain and Ren were quiet for a long time, but Ren finally perked up. He said, in his most confident voice, “We must get Tam back, and we will.”
The Captain sighed. “I admire your confidence, Ren, but it may be too late.â€Back on the Blood Storm, Vashkar was ecstatic. “This is wonderful news, Tam. I’m glad you saw our- ” He broke off, staring upward at a stormy petrel hovering above the topsail. It uttered a series of harsh croaks, and the stormmaster’s expression changed.
“They have another person with fire talent aboard the Sea Roc. Well, we can turn that to our advantage. Contact this person and tell him that you are being held captive aboard the Blood Storm at the Free Isle of Kievl. We’ll trap them there.”
“Contact him, sir?” Tam said.
“Through fire scrying. Like you did a few hours ago, before you passed out. Surely you know how?”
Tam looked away to hide his fear. He had no idea how Ren and him had contacted each other before. Anything was better than angering Vashkar, though, so he lied, “Of course I do. Why wouldn’t I?”
“Very good,” said Rake, and with that he walked away, leaving Tam to try and contact Ren by himself. He went down to his cabin, feeling sick.
Tam sat down on his bunk. This was the worst thing that had ever happened to him. Well, maybe not the worst… He shook his head sharply to clear that thought away and turned his, mind to something else. It had been a mistake to agree to the terms of the stormmaster. He could see that now. And yet, the thought of power beckoned him. As first mate, no one would dare to mock him. He had better try the fire scrying. Tam rolled onto his stomach and tried to remember what he had been thinking about when he had gone into a trance.
As Tam concentrated, he began to feel strangely hot around his extremities. I wonder if I’m getting a fever, he thought. Then he realized that, whatever was happening, it was not normal.
There was a loud, muffled fump, as though an alchemical cannon had gone off behind heavy doors. A small ball of white-hot flame hit the floor in front of him. At first, it was nebulous, flinging out small shreds of fire. Tam concentrated, willing it to help him contact Ren. To his surprise, it did, shrinking to a pinprick before vanishing in a burst of light that momentarily blinded him.
As Tam blinked away dazzling sunbursts of color, he saw that he was in the mysterious gray space that he had been in once before. Ren was standing in front of him, wearing a startled expression.
Tam quickly gabbled out what he was supposed to say. “I’m on the Blood Storm, berthed at the Isle of Kievl. Tell Captain Pye to send help- or, better yet, come himself!”Ren passed on the message, along with the fact that Tam had looked rather surprised and scared, spoken quickly, and broke contact as soon as he had finished talking, or sooner.
Captain Pye gnawed another kraken tentacle- unless it was the same one, Ren couldn’t be sure and didn’t know how tough kraken tentacles were- and thought about this.
Finally he heaved a great sigh and stood up. “We must rescue Tam. But I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”
“Why?” asked Ren.
“I don’t know, boy, I don’t know. It just…” he trailed off. Ren waited patiently for five long minutes before Pye spoke again. “Tam’s an odd one, and I don’t understand him. Certainly not when I can’t look him in the face.” And having delivered that uninformative and puzzling message, he left the cabin.
Three days later they reached the Isle of Kievl. The Captain was unnaturally edgy, and Ren was nervous too. He had tried to contact Tam, but the older boy hadn’t spoken to him, and had cut off the scrying as quickly as he could. It was probably just Tam’s captors making life unpleasant, he reassured himself.
Ren stood on deck, watching the jolly boats being lowered into the water. The Isle of Kievl was another of those “uninhabited” isles, but, in contrast to Lithuslov, it was practically empty. There were a few tiny villages and a port about half the size of Pukislyn, but nothing really big.Tam felt a surge of guilt as he saw the Sea Roc come into harbor. He had tried to minimize the guilt and anxiety by not speaking to Ren, half-hoping that if he refused communication Ren would know it was a trap. But it hadn’t worked, as was clear from the trusting way Ren tried to contact. “We’ll rescue you, Tam,” he had said only an hour or so ago. “Don’t worry.”
“Oh, forget it,” Tam told himself now. “It’s not as though you owe them anything. Any rate, you have to take the chance you get.” He was beginning to wish he wasn’t the bait, and that he could go down into his cabin and curl up on the bunk and not come out until they were very far away. But that wasn’t going to happen, was it?
The crew of the Sea Roc brought it into the harbor and hung it into the shore. They let down the jolly boats and started making there way towards shore. Tam, shaking, put his hands behind the back, sending the first signal: Get ready.
The crew of the Sea Roc were on the shore now, getting out of their boats, and looking around at the island. Tam jumped up: Weapon set. Captain Pye told the crew to stay there, and he and Ren walked towards Tam nervously, as if they were expecting something to jump out at them. How right they are, Tam thought.
Captain Pye and Ren were only about three feet away from him now. He lifted up his hands, causing looks of confusion on the captain’s face, and dropped them: ATTACK! was the signal.
A loud cry from the woods, and then more yells, and then sailors came running at Ren. One advanced towards Ren, swinging his wooden stick, and Ren heard Tam yell, and Captain Pye shout, “Retreat to the east!” and then everything went black.
When Ren woke up, Captain Pye and Tam were standing over him, worry knit in their eyebrows. Captain Pye was the first to speak. “We were able to keep you and Tam safe,” he said, “but they took our boats and killed twelve of our thirty men.”
“I’m sorry, Ren,” Tam said sadly.
“Oh, right,” said Ren bitterly. “I sure believe that. You could have at least hinted it was a trap, if you were too scared-” he spat the word out as though it were a wind-beetle- “to actually say outright.”
“I did!” cried Tam. “Why do you think I wouldn’t talk?”
“Boys,” said Captain Pye, breaking up what might have become a verbal fight, if not a physical one. “You can quarrel later; right now we have to think about escaping.”
“Escaping? You mean we’re prisoners?”
“Yes. But at least we’re not dead,” said Captain Pye.
“Where are we?” asked Ren, sitting up.
“We’re on the Isle of Kievl, in a stockade guarded by twenty-five warriors. We have to think of an escape plan.”
“Not me,” said Tam quietly. “I already made my choice. I’m going to work the Orb of Centaur for them. You could too, Ren. We could work it together, and live in the utmost comfort. It would be a wonderful life.” He looked hopeful, until Ren shook his head.
“Have you any idea what the Orb does to you, Tam? It’ll kill you if you work it!”
Ren looked around the stockade. Most of the crew members he’d met were still there. Vushtek di Fundermuult was lying on the ground, barely conscious, with a bloody rag wrapped around his arm. Niria Tolmark was hunched over in the corner, face buried in her hands, body shaking with sobs. Tzil Azuro was just coming round, staggering to his feet.
Tzil’s eyes rolled wildly, then focused on Tam. “You!” he roared. “Traitor!”
Ignoring Captain Pye’s alarmed cry, he snatched up a blazing phlogiston lamp from its alcove in the wall and hurled it straight at Tam’s chest.
Tam ducked, but although it missed his chest, it caught his hair on fire. Captain Pye whipped off his cap and used it to smother the flames.
“Tzil! What do you think you’re doing?”
“Getting rid of a traitor,” the haggard stormmaster hissed.
“I will not permit this! The boy is under my protection.”
“He forfeited his right to that protection when he betrayed us all!” Something in Tzil seemed to snap. He pulled out his knife.
Then the door opened. The appearance of the man standing in the doorway did nothing to advertise the fact that he was one of the most feared men in all of Sphaere. He had an almost apologetic look on his pale face, and he wore gold-rimmed half-moon glasses. He was wearing a white robe that would have been dangerously fashionable about two centuries before, and he was short. The overall effect was that of a scholar who’d gotten lost and was politely asking directions.
Still, Ren couldn’t help but notice the long, razor-sharp rapier hanging from his belt.
“Mordran,” Vushtek spat.
“Yes, the very same,” said the man. He peered around as though he was nearsighted, but Ren had the distinct impression that the glasses were for show, as was most of his outfit.
Whatever had made Tzil throw that lamp at Tam only snapped more when Mordran came in. Tzil raised his dagger and ran at Mordran. Mordran simply stepped aside as if nothing had happened and spoke calmly and quietly, almost in a whisper.
“I need the boys now,” he said.
“No. I will not let them go,” Captain Pye replied. Ren could not tell how he felt, his expression strange.
“Oh, I am afraid that you do not have a choice. They work the Orb, or I make them work it.” Mordran tapped at his head, although neither Tam nor Ren could tell what this meant. He went on: “My power has increased-on
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in July 12th, 2008 @ 13:08“Oh, I am afraid that you do not have a choice. They work the Orb, or I make them work it.” Mordran tapped at his head, although neither Tam nor Ren could tell what this meant. He went on: “My power has increased-only slightly, but enough for me to take them.”
Niria looked up at this, but still avoided everyone’s eyes. “Jarbun magic,” she said under her breath. Then she yelled, “What have you done to the Unknowables?”
“What’s she talking about?” said Ren. Captain Pye only shook his head, and Tam looked stricken.
“You needn’t take me,” said Tam hastily, stepping forward with a frightened expression. “I’ll go of my own accord.”
Ren felt put out. Everyone seemed to know about this but him. Nonetheless, he wasn’t going to work for Mordran. He would avoid it at all costs.As a matter of fact, Tam knew a good deal less than Ren thought. At the mention of the Unknowables, however, he knew enough. He was not going to go through that again. It didn’t matter whether Mordran had killed them (they couldn’t die, he was almost certain), or taken their powers, but if Mordran was strong enough to do something to them where even Tam could not, Tam was not going to get on his bad side.
“I did nothing to them,” said Mordran, barely acknowledging Tam. “Nothing permanent, at any rate. They will recover their powers sometime in the next fifty years. Not so very long to them, but long enough to prevent them rescuing your lot.”
“What are the Unknowables?” asked Ren, and once more he was ignored.
Mordran grinned. “Come with me, both of you.”
Ren stood his ground, though he was shaking like a dry leaf. “No.”
“Come on,” Tam implored. “There’s no way to refuse him, and if you resist, he’ll just hurt you.”
“Your colleague is a lot smarter than you are,” Mordran said to Ren. “I’ll give you one last chance.”
“No,” Ren said, in a barely audible whisper.
A bolt of pain stabbed through his temples like a red hot bar of iron. He was irresistibly dragged toward the door.
“Blast!” Captain Pye exclaimed, and leaped at Mordran, pulling out an ornate flintlock. Mordran snarled in fury and gestured once. A spurt of green flame consumed the pistol, and Octavio Pye was hurled back ten feet. He hit the wall and lay still.
But Ren was temporarily free, and he was near the door. Shoving Tam aside, he leaped out the doorway. In midair, he yelled “Flamulo Helioso!”
Two crossbow bolts whizzed past him, but he was ascending rapidly, and soon the guards running about below him became only specks.
Ren landed on a high pinnacle of rock just as the fire blazing on his arms went out. Now, he thought, to find a way to rescue the rest of the crew.
Ren had never been particularly good at making plans. He was as good at executing them as anyone, but he lacked the talent for making them. Now he sat on the rock till the sun went down, blazing red over the ocean, but he still could think of nothing.
I can’t go to sleep, Ren thought. He was tired after staying up all night, but couldn’t go to sleep until he had a plan. But he was so tired. Maybe if he just closed his eyes for a few minutes. He was about to fall into deep sleep when suddenly, a voice appeared in his head. Was it his voice? No, Ren realized, it was a female. Ren was sure he had never heard this voice before, yet it sounded oddly familiar… Ren? Is that you? the voice said.
Yes. It is me, Ren replied.
Oh, splendid. I hoped I had contacted you and not that awful Mordran. He better not be overhearing us.
Ren was excited now, but scared at the same time. His eyes widened. He knew who this was.
Alexis? Is that you?
Yes, it is.
We need to rescue Captain Pye and the crew of the Sea Roc, thought Ren. And Tam.
Alexis made a disapproving thought. Ren, Tam may be too far gone to rescue. He is too frightened of the Unknowables to disobey Mordran.
What are the Unknowables? asked Ren. Finally, he would get some answers!
The Unknowables are gods, said Alexis after a long pause. She seemed reluctant to say more, but Ren was not going to let her get away without telling him everything.
They can’t be gods! he thought in disbelief. There are no temples to them, nothing! I didn’t even know about them till the other day!
The Empire banned them. No one was allowed to worship them, and slowly the people forgot. Only a few people still know of them. Tam is one.
But why? And how does he know? And how do you know that?
Alexis did not reply.
Alexis, please tell me! Ren begged.
Nothing.
At least tell me where you are, Ren pleaded.
Look up, she replied.
Ren did as he was told, and lo and behold, there was Alexis, softly flapping her dragon wings, and with her were… Ren gasped. Are those your children?
Yes, she replied, unhappily.
What is wrong?
Out of thirty eggs, only these three survived. The rest were caught by poachers and sent to incubation to be brought up and killed for their fur. Her voice was dripping with anger now.
I’m sorry, said Ren lamely.
Alexis sent a small thought of acknowledgement. That story can be told later. Right now, I have a plan.
We need a sail, Alexis said.
“Over there,” Ren said, though he was confused as to the plan. “On the Blood Storm.”
The Pukises, already in dragon form, flew down to the ship and sliced off the topsail in short order. Returning it to the rock, Alexis explained.
You’ll hold on to these corner ropes, and we’ll get up to our hottest while flying right under the sail. The hot air will buoy you up. Try to jump in the general direction of the guarded compound where your friends are. You’ll be high enough that the guards won’t see you. When we get right over it, we’ll cool down and burn a hole in the roof. The sail will act as a parachute, you’ll drop down into the room, your friends will grab hold of the lines, and- Do you have a stormmaster?
“Yes.”
Good. Then he’ll blow us back to the Sea Roc, and we’ll sail off.
Ren seized the lines, hoping he wasn’t making a huge mistake. The Pukises flared up, and the sail ballooned out. But Ren didn’t lift off.
Alexis closed her eyes, and a cloud of blue flame enveloped her. I’m pushing myself as far as I can. Go!
This time Ren was hauled a little into the air, with an effort that neither Alexis nor Ren seemed to enjoy. The lines cut into his hands, and the flame of the Pukises seemed frighteningly near. He took a deep breath, made a hurried prayer to no one in particular, and jumped.
For a minute Ren watched in terror as the ground grew larger and nearer at an unexpected rate, but then the heat on his hair grew stronger and he nearly cried out, but he was going up.
He didn’t know how long he could stand this. His arms felt like they were being pulled out of their sockets and he could feel the flame leaning towards him hungrily, despite the Pukis’ attempts to control it.
Then they were above the compound. A crossbow bolt shot upward and almost punctured the canvas, but missed by inches. The Pukises stopped blazing and flew down below Ren, blowing fireballs at the roof. At first, the thatch burned merrily, but then a large timber cracked, and the ceiling fell in just as Ren landed with a thump.
The pirates were much as before, with the exception of Tam and Tzil, both of which had disappeared. Captain Pye was pacing the floor in agitation, but stopped dead when Ren fell though the roof in a bundle of sail and Pukises.
The roof smoldered and blazed above. The pirates looked from it, to Ren, and back at the burning straw and wood again. Ren disentangled himself sail, stood up, and bowed shakily.
“Ren!” exclaimed Captain Pye. “How in Sphaere did you get away?”
“I flew,” said Ren. “Where’s Tzil?”
“Tzil?” said Pye. “I don’t – oh no.”
He raced outside, with Ren on his heels to find Tam backed up against the boards of the stockade, desperately trying to fight off a maddened Tzil, who was snarling and pressing his long knife to Tam’s throat. Tam spied Captain Pye and Ren and screamed to them. “Help!”
They raced to his aid, but before they could reach Tam, Tzil suddenly changed tact and plunged his blade into Tam’s chest.
Ren stopped dead.
“Finally, we are rid of that traitor!” roared Tzil in triumph. Then he realized what he had done, and froze. The look of shock on Tam’s face turned to one of rage, and eldritch fire began flowing up the knife in his chest, which Tzil was still grasping. The fire wrapped itself around Tzil’s arm as he struggled to break free, using his own power of try to ward it off, but to no avail. Suddenly a huge fireball engulfed his thrashing body and he flew up in the air, finally ripping his dagger from Tam’s chest as he ascended ablaze. Lighting overwhelmed the airborne inferno and drew the hardly recognizable form of Tzil into the clouds, where all stormmasters are taken by their element to die. The long dagger carried by Tzil in life quivered upright in the dirt. His eyes rolling back in his head, Tam collapsed on the ground.
Pye rushed to the boy’s side, but Ren stood frozen, staring at the unconscious Tam. It seemed all-wrong somehow. Sure, Tam had made a bargain with the Empire, sure, he was a traitor, sure, he no longer belonged to the pirates, but still! Ren couldn’t believe that Tzil had just…killed him. Just like that. And why hadn’t the guards come to Tam’s aid when they heard his call for help?
A thought came to Ren’s mind. He frowned, puzzled. It wasn’t a fire word, but it felt powerful even so. He spoke it softly, under his breath, and felt his mouth grow hot. He breathed deeply but quickly, and found that a light was shining out of his mouth, a flaming, purple, fiery light.
He felt eyes staring at him, and, as if in a trance, he moved his own fingers into the flame. It didn’t burn. On the contrary, as he watched, the myriad small cuts and scars on his hands closed up, vanished without a trace. He walked towards Tam, suddenly realizing what the fire did.
“REN!” Captain Pye yelled. “What in Sphaere are you doing?”
Ren did not reply. His mouth was full of fire, and his fingertips crackled with dancing, flickering, flames.
“Ren, you idiot!” screamed Pye. “It’ll kill you! It’ll kill him!” But his warning came too late, as the fire vanished in a shower of sparks. Tam looked no different than before, and slowly Ren sat down on the hard ground with his back against the stockade. He saw Alexis fluttering above him in dragon form, and Captain Pye looking aghast, and then he lay his head down on his knees, and fell into a deep, unnatural sleep.Mordran sat down in the wooden-and-gilt chair that was provided for him, breathing heavily. However Ren felt, Mordran felt ten times worse. It wasn’t easy, channeling the powers of a god through yourself and into another. Especially when the other was so far away. But it had worked, the man was sure of it. Even if the first boy never recovered, the second was helpless. Mordran must give the order now, before the shock of such power had worn off. He reached into his sleeve and pulled out an item resembling a silver bell. He shook it, and a single, high-pitched, note resounded through the room. When it had faded, all was quiet. Then, and only then, did Mordran allow himself to sleep.
Octavio Pye watched as Ren’s eyes closed, and he slipped into oblivion. It was a magic-induced sleep, the Captain knew. He had seen enough of them, having two weatherweavers on his ship. But he had never seen anything like the magic that Ren had just performed. The fire consuming the boy, only to vanish as suddenly as it had come, without even the slightest traces left. No ash, no burns on Ren or Tam-nothing. But then again, he reminded himself. What did he know? He had no elemental talent at all, so who was he to judge whether something was going wrong or not?
He turned his attention back on Tam, who looked exactly as before. Ah well. Unfathomable talent or not, the boys were more than mere tools, and it would do them no good to be soaked in the storm that he felt tingling over the horizon. Pye turned to the hut, in front of which the remainder of the crew of the Sea Roc was standing, awed at the spectacle.
“Let’s get the boys inside,” said Pye. “It looks like it might rain.”
Moments later the rain came down heavy on the roof. Captain Pye and Vushtek crouched over the boys, inspecting Tam’s wound. It was only a physical wound, not a magical wound, thank goodness, so it would heal in time. But in his current state he wasn’t in any shape to tell them exactly what he’d been doing for the past four or five days. Too, bad, really, Pye thought.“There is nothing we can do about Tzil,” said Vushtek to Niria. “He is dead.”
“Perhaps,” replied Niria calmly, and the others relaxed. Niria Tolmark was still young, not yet hardened by a life of piracy, and no one was sure how she would take the death of her fellow stormmaster. “It is not Tzil I worry about,” she continued. “It is them.” She jerked her chin toward first Ren, and then Tam, lying on the two hard bunks. “That wasn’t natural, what Ren did.”
“He isn’t natural,” Captain Pye informed her. “Not to us.”
“I suppose not,” she sighed. “I know nothing of fire.”
This conversation was interrupted by the arrival of a smug-looking Mordran, who bowed smoothly and said, “I have decided to let you go free.”
There was a stunned and mistrustful silence, and then Pye said, “And the boys?”
“The boys as well. Your ship is in the harbor still; she is unharmed. Now go.”
They did not have to be told twice.Hours later, after everybody but Tam and he had left the cabin where they now lay, Ren shifted restlessly in his sleep. His dreams were uneasy. He kept seeing a fire, burning, burning, burning his skin, burning away his strength. He tried as hard as he could, but he couldn’t scream.
Then, right before the flames consumed him, the vision changed. Ren suddenly found himself sitting on a cold floor in what looked a lot like a dungeon. On impulse, he tried to stand, but quickly realized that he was held down by shadow-like chains.
“No!” A scream filled the room.
Ren looked up abruptly and saw Tam rolling around in agony on the damp dungeon floor.
“What have I done to you?! Why do I deserve such agony?! Please! No!” Tam screamed again.
“Tam!” Ren yelled. “Stop it!”
The other boy shuddered and ceased his thrashing. Ren sat there for what felt like hours, watching Tam sleep. He kept trying to tell himself that this was all a dream, but the longer he remained in the dark room his doubts continued to grow.
Tam stirred. A yawn escaped his lips and he sat up.
“Where . . . where are we?” Tam asked.
“You,” answered a sinister voice,” are in my mind cells. Nice, aren’t they?”
Mordran strode confidently into the room.
“This entire facility, including myself, is an illusion, it only takes place in your mind, but it is very effective as a prison.”
The two boys gazed at Mordran, clearly uncomprehending.
Mordran smiled nastily in return. ” You will remain here until you give me what I want: your allegiance.”
With that, Mordran stalked away, fading as he walked. The faint stench of rot lingered in the room.
Tam’s eyes widened in panic. “What are we going to do?” he gasped.
“I don’t want to be his servant!” Ren added. He glanced around the small room, if you could even call it a room. Was it just his imagination, or was it growing more revolting? The rotting smell that he had noticed came from the rotting flesh of a body in the chamber that surely had no been there a minute ago, and the smell was growing stronger.
“I already agreed to work the Orb,” said Tam desperately. “I’ll do anything, if I could just get out of here!” Tam seemed to be immobile, staring into space at something invisible. “I don’t want to die! I don’t want anybody to die while he tries to get to me!”
“Tam, that’s very noble, but think of all the people that would die if he was able to use the Orb!”
“I don’t care!” Tam’s face had grown very white, and his hands were making the chains shake.
The noise only added to Ren’s growing sense of claustrophobia and despair. He wanted to stop the noise, stop the smell, stop everything but his own mind, and think. He reached out to slap the older boy, but his own chains would not allow it. The smell was becoming a thick, impenetrable fog, and Tam moaned on. Finally Ren snapped. “SHUT UP!” he yelled. “Let me think!”
“Oh no, dear boy. You cannot think here,” said Mordran’s voice from somewhere inside the depths of the room – his own mind, Ren realized. He felt betrayed. How could his own mind have come up with something so awful? But of course it hadn’t. This was Mordran’s invention, and Ren could do nothing but watch.
So watch he did. He watched Tam grow more and more frightened, more and more willing to serve Mordran in exchange for release from this prison, and he watched the chains crumble until finally they gave way all together and Tam fainted.
“There,” said Mordran, entering the room again. “Perfect. Now, my dear boy, you shall be all alone.” As Ren watched, Tam’s inert form faded until nothing was left.
“Is-is he dead?” Ren asked.
“Oh no, not dead,” said Mordran. “He is my servant, and will work the Orb until he does die, and an unpleasant death it will be, too. But he hasn’t any choice. Neither have you. No one can endure this for long, and in the end everyone gives up. Or,” he added, motioning to the rotting carcass, “you end up like him.”Captain Pye sat awkwardly on a small chair in his cabin, staring blindly at his paperwork. Across from him in the bunk lay his unconscious cabin boy and powder monkey. He sighed and put his head in his hands. The pair of boys had been in asleep for weeks.
Suddenly, there was a rustling in the sheets. One of the boys turned and sat up in bed. It was Tam. Captain Pye gasped in surprise and grabbed Tam’s shoulders.
“What’s going on boy? Why isn’t Ren awake?”
Tam’s eyes seemed to flash a slight red color, but immediately returned back to normal. Captain Pye blinked; perhaps he had imagined it.
“What? Ren?” Tam asked innocently. “What a sleepy head! He’s still in bed?”
“Yes.” Captain replied stonily “You and him have been sleeping for weeks now.”
“Ren’s problems are no concern of mine.” Tam said with only a fleeting look of guilt. “Now, please excuse me, I wish to get out of this room.”
Tam pushed the Captain roughly out of the way and strode purposefully out to the deck. By now, Pye had begun to suspect something. He watched Tam walk toward one of the rowboats on the far side of the ship.
Captain Pye’s eyes grew wide and he shouted, “Stop him!”
The crew instantly stopped what they were doing. The men closest to Tam tried to grab him, but Tam was quicker. Muttering a word under his breath, his arms caught flame and he rose into the air. Without a word, he landed on a small boat. With a wave of his hand the ropes securing the vehicle burned away. The rowboat wobbled and fell into the water. The crew watched as Tam rowed furiously away. Captain Pye stared after the boys receding figure with worry. Tam’s condition could only mean one thing: Ren was in trouble!Niria stared her captain in concern. “Are you sure, Captain?” she asked carefully.
Pye nodded sharply. “The Shriak Mind Bonding is the only way that I can communicate with Ren. We cannot let Mordran take Ren as he so obviously did Tam. Letting this happen would be disastrous to the whole world as we know it.”
“But sir!” Niria protested. “The Bonding is an extremely ancient process! We do not even know if it works! It could very well backfire and kill you!”
Pye shook his head and chuckled. “Then, you can have my hat.”
Niria sighed. She had tried to warn him.Ren lay on the cold dungeon floor, miserable. He wished that he could strangle Tam. At least before he had someone to talk to, even if he wouldn’t talk back.
“If I get out of here, I will personally make Tam wish he had never been born,” he vowed.
It was only then that he realized that he had been talking aloud. Great, he thought, now I’m talking to myself. I’m going crazy.
Suddenly, something touched his thoughts. Ren was instantly alert. Who was it? Had Mordran decided to resort to some less passive form of torture? No! He wouldn’t let Mordran win! With as much savagery as he could muster, he attacked the strand of thought.Niria watched Captain Pye as he concentrated. A look of satisfaction told her that he had succeeded with making contact with Ren. Niria let go of the breath that she had been holding since the beginning of the Bonding process. It had worked!
A sharp intake of breath told her something was wrong. Captain Pye was kneeling on the floor, holding his head in agony, his mouth open a silent scream. Niria rushed to his side, but there was nothing she could do. Captain Pye’s veins stuck out on his neck, which was red and covered with sweat. His eyes bugged out of his head. The strain was too much for him. He collapsed in a dead faint.
A moan came out of the far corner of the room. Niria looked up and saw Ren sitting up in bed, his eyes wide in alarm.
“Niria?” Ren questioned in disbelief.
“Ren!” Niria gasped. “Get Vushtek! Now! Quick-”
Ren nodded and jumped out of bed. He didn’t know what was going on, but he did know where to find Vushtek. He ran to the galley as fast as he could.
“Vushtek!” he called into the open doorway. “The Captain-” Vushtek appeared in the door in a twinkling, wearing a grubby white apron over his emerald green robes.
“What about him?” he asked, concern etched on his face.
“I don’t know! Something’s wrong!”
Vushtek needed no more explanation than that. He did not bother to take off his apron, but headed towards the cabin right away. Ren followed rather uncertainly.
Vushtek entered the cabin and stopped in his tracks when he saw the Captain. “What happened?” he demanded of Niria.
“He – he tried to do the Shriak Mind Bonding. And it went wrong,” Niria stammered, her pretty face distraught.
“He tried to do the Bonding? And you let him? Of course it went wrong! It’s the Bonding!” He knelt by the unconscious captain, and started to take his pulse. “I’m not one to criticize my captain,” he said, “but this is ridiculous.”
Niria nodded. “And he said – he said that if he died, I could have his hat!” This was too much for her, and she started to sob uncontrollably.
Ren looked on, hardly hearing a word, as Vushtek, in an unusually bad temper, questioned Niria, who continued to cry. But then something brought him back down to earth.
“It wasn’t during the Bonding that it all went wrong,” said Niria, gaining some measure of control. “It was after, once he’d actually reached Ren and it ought to have been easy.”
Ren turned cold. He cleared his throat. “What exactly does this Bonding do?” he asked, his voice perilously close to cracking.
Vushtek and Niria turned to look at him. “It gives two people contact through their minds,” Niria explained. “Didn’t you feel it?”
But Ren could not reply.
“Oh no,” he murmured. “Oh no, oh no, oh please no.”
“Ren?” asked Niria, comprehension dawning in her eyes. “What did you do?”
“I didn’t . . . mean . . .” began Ren through a fog of horror. “I thought it was Mordran . . . trying to get into my mind . . .”
Niria eyes grew as big as saucers. Vushtek stared at Ren as if he wanted to pierce his brain.
“You attacked his mind,” Vushtek stated calmly.
The large man turned to the Captain and felt his pulse once more.
“He’s not dead, but near it. I may be able to soothe the pain slightly, but he needs to get expert help. We will need to stop at the nearest port as quickly as possible if he is to survive.”
Vushtek grunted and lifted Captain Pye gently onto a bed. He motioned for Niria and Ren to leave them in peace. Niria brushed past Ren as they left, she didn’t meet his eyes.Ren stared hollowly at nothing. He did not feel the deck rolling beneath his feet, or the wind on his face, or hear the men working behind him. He did, however, notice when someone appeared at his elbow and asked, “What’s going on? No one’ll tell me.”
Ren turned and met the eyes of the cabin boy, Arn. “Oh, hello,” he said, deadpan. The other boy looked alarmed.
“What’s going on?” he asked again.
Ren looked back out across the stern of the ship, at the great blue-green watery expanse. “Go ask someone else,” he said. “Leave me alone.”
“No,” replied the cabin boy stubbornly. He was much larger than Ren, and smaller boys would not dare refuse such a large and ferocious-looking person. Ren did not spare him a glance, nor say another word.
Arn waited, leaning his arms on a bulwark. Ren would give in and say sooner or later. He could wait.
He did not have to wait long. In a few minutes, Ren spoke.
“I think I may have – I might have . . . killed . . . the Captain.”
Arn looked at him in mingled astonishment and anger. “Why in Sphaere?” he exploded. “What did he do to you?”
“Nothing at all,” Ren said. “I didn’t mean to. He tried to get inside my mind. Don’t ask. Please leave me alone.”
“The Captain is dead?” Arn asked, his fury giving way to incredulity.
“No,” said Ren. “Not yet. Hopefully never. But he might die. If he did it would be all my fault. Go away. Don’t tell anyone, please.”
Arn stared at Ren curiously, but did as he was asked.Tam had no idea where he going. In fact, if he had been in his right mind, he would not have left the Sea Roc at all. There seemed to be a buzzing in his head, telling him where to go.
Tam looked around himself. He saw no evidence that he going anywhere near land. Everything was ocean, as far as his eyes could see. He wondered silently if he was doing the right thing.
He thought about Ren. Ren seemed so certain about what he should do, when he, Tam, had no idea what was right. Guilt filled him as he remembered that Ren was still trapped in the dark mind cell. Tam couldn’t believe that Ren would ever surrender. He imagined Ren staying trapped in his mind, until he died, leaving his rotting corpse to lay there forever.
The buzzing filled Tam’s head again and he shook the thoughts of Ren out of his mind. Ren was a fool to not give his services to the empire. If he didn’t use his powers for the greater good then he deserved his fate.Ren stood silently on the deck of The Sea Roc, looking out over the small port town where they had docked. A numb feeling was quickly rushing up inside him. It was the worst sensation he had ever experienced.
Hushed voices drifted toward him from the captain’s cabin. Out of corner of his eye, he watched a small, frail man making frantic hand gestures to Vushtek. The large man nodded and left the older gentleman alone with Captain Pye’s still form.
Ren heard soft footfalls behind him and felt a rather large hand rest on his shoulder. It was Vushtek.
“The doctor is starting the procedure,” he said. “The Captain should survive.”
Ren gave a stiff nod and Vushtek turned away. No one seemed eager to stay in his company. After all, hadn’t it been he, Ren, who had attacked the Captain and practically killed him?Tam stared at the sky, brooding. His mind kept telling him to keep rowing onward, but his mouth was parched and his stomach had been empty for days. He lowered his eyes and looked desperately into the distance. His eyes grew wide and he jumped up in excitement. The boat wobbled dangerously, so he sat back down. With a sudden burst of energy, Tam began rowing again with vigor. Land was in sight!
The ship was silent and Ren felt horribly conspicuous. He continued to stare woodenly at the port in front of him. Jartuvi, his mind told him. The third Free Isle you’ve seen. But he didn’t care. It was simply another thing to stare at, unseeing. He was such an idiot. He ought to have known better than to attack someone’s mind, after Alexis. But he had done so anyway.
Somewhere that seemed a world away, Niria started to cry.
It was all too much for Ren, and without a second thought, he slipped over the side of the ship and plunged into the water.
It was greasy, and dark, and made his clothes stick to his skin, but he rose to the surface anyway, spit out a mouthful of the foul harbor-water, and started to swim doggedly toward shore.
He was almost there when he felt something touch his mind. His first instinct was to defend himself, but he stifled that and went under with surprise.
When he came back up to the surface again, he saw an amused-looking blue Pukis hovering above him.
“Alexis!” he gasped out loud, going under again.
Of course, she replied. I wasn’t going to abandon you. She regarded him for a moment and then said, On second thought, why don’t we just talk when we get to shore.
Ren nodded in agreement and swam the remaining strokes to the harbor wall. Once there, he pulled himself up onto it and looked back towards the Sea Roc. No one was looking for him. No one had noticed his splash. He wasn’t sure whether to be glad or desolate. He settled on simply pushing the thought out of his mind.
Come on, said Alexis. We should go somewhere where there aren’t quite as many people.
Ren nodded in agreement. Where?
I know a place. Come on. With that she turned into a kitten and trotted off towards what appeared to be a completely abandoned shack. Ren followed with a little trepidation.
Where are your children? he asked.
They went back to Lithuslov. It has been several weeks, you know. This last was said with a touch of amusement, but Ren remembered the mind cells and could find nothing even remotely funny.On the Sea Roc, things were much as Ren had imagined them. The Captain was still asleep, the doctor was getting into his rowing boat, and Niria was still sobbing from the emotional stress of the last few days. By now the last few days had morphed into the last few weeks, and she was crying for Tzil and the dead crewmembers as well as the Captain.
But someone had noted the splash. Perched high on the crosstrees was a monkey, carefully watching the scene below.
When the doctor had rowed off towards the shore, Vushtek turned to Niria. “Would you like to stand guard over the Captain?” he asked kindly. “I’ll make you some tea if you’d like.”
Niria nodded mutely, wiped her eyes, and went into the cabin. Vushtek disappeared into the galley. No one mentioned a splash, or noticed that Ren was missing. The monkey-that-was-not-a-monkey smiled an eerie grin, turned into a wind-beetle, and flew off to the other side of the Isle. Its master would be pleased with it.The deck of the Blood Storm was empty, except for one man. Rake Vashkar smiled thinly, projecting his thoughts through the rippling spray, calling back his servants.
A wind beetle landed on the deck in front of him. Fluttering its delicate, blue-patterned wings, it slowly dissolved into a puddle of salt water.
With frightening speed, a cloaked man grew out of the puddle like a rising pillar. “The Fiery One is no longer aboard the Sea Roc,” it hissed. “He will be easy to find and capture.”
“Go. Take your brethren and bring him to me. I will send word to Mordran.”
Vashkar’s smile grew into a grin. Ren’s will would be easy to break, and with two Fire Powerful on his side, Mordran would easily be able to wipe out every freebooter in the Inner Sea. His faithful stormmaster would certainly receive a sizable percentage of the enormous reward that Sanguinus IX would give him.
Of course, if Vashkar had known the full scope of Mordran’s plan, he would have jumped over the side and raced to warn the Emperor before it was too late.Ren followed Alexis along the beach. After walking for several minutes, they arrived at a small clump of trees away from the city. Alexis curled up under one of the trees, so Ren followed suit.
So, Alexis said with an amused glimmer in her eye. What has my human been getting up to while I’ve been gone?
Ren related his story to Alexis gratefully. He had needed to talk to someone for a long time.
Well, you’ve certainly had a time without me haven’t you? she commented with an amused purr. Don’t worry about Captain Pye. He has a strong mind; you have not broken it.
Ren nodded but worry was still etched across his face. Alexis looked like she wanted to say something more but she was interrupted by a crunch of wood grounding against rock and a boyish whoop. The friends peered though the foliage and glimpsed a young man with scraggly hair and a hungry look in his eyes. The boy left his vehicle behind and began hiking toward the city.
Ren crept cautiously toward the abandoned rowboat and peered inside. It was totally empty except for a small sign carved into the back. Ren stared at it and immediately recognized it as the signature of The Sea Roc. With alarm, Ren turned from the boat and watched the boy’s disappearing figure. Tam!
He almost yelled after him to come back, he had so much to talk about, but he remembered in time Tam’s treachery and was silent.
Well, what are you going to do about it? asked Alexis, reading his tumbled thoughts.
“I don’t know, he replied aloud, sounding suddenly both very young and very unhappy. “Should I follow him?”
She replied with another question. Does the crew of the Sea Roc know where you have gone?
“No. But they don’t care anyhow. I nearly killed the Captain, they can’t ever forgive me.”
I wouldn’t be so sure about that. I strongly suggest that you return before they start to worry.
“Fine.” Ren turned and trudged back towards the harbor, with Alexis sitting contentedly on his shoulder. A small brown wren detached itself from a twig and flapped off in the direction of the Blood Storm.
Ren was halfway back to the Sea Roc when it struck him that he had no way to get across the harbor save by swimming or going back to get the boat. The next thing that struck him was a large stick against the back of his head.
The impact knocked him face first onto the path, and when he rolled over onto his back, still clutching his head with his ears ringing, he saw a tall cloaked man with watery eyes looking down on him. The man raised his stick for another blow-
And Alexis flew into his face, a small, hissing ball of fire, fur, and scales. The man looked taken aback, but he said a word and a moment later Alexis fell to the sand, dripping with water and steaming slightly. Ren dove forward to grab her before the man could do any more harm, but the Pukis spit a tiny ball of flame that scorched Ren’s hand and lit the man’s robes on fire. A single word appeared in Ren’s mind, etched on the back of his eyelids in blazing letters, and that word was,
RUN!
He did. He ran back along the beach towards the town, away from the rowboat, (away from Alexis!), knowing that he had to get back to the Sea Roc. He had to warn them, and he had to get to safety. There was not the slightest doubt in the boy’s mind about what the man was – who the man was. He had seen the scar above his right eyebrow.
Who had let Letor out, Sphaere knew. But he certainly was no longer a prisoner.Tam wandered aimlessly through the streets of Jartuvi. He was looking for something or someone, but he had no idea who. Tam found himself walking inside a small side tavern. He headed straight for the barman.
The barman took one look at him and said, “Oh, his grace told me I would be expecting someone like you.” He reached under the table and produced a grubby little key. “Your room’s up the stairs on the right.” he said gruffly and turned to a waiting customer.
Tam stumbled up the stairs and managed to open the door to his room before collapsing on the bed.Ren couldn’t remember a time where he’d run faster in his life, not counting the time when he had run from the emperors guards. That day seemed ages ago.
Ren picked up even more speed as the docks came into sight. He dived into the water and swam toward The Sea Roc. With the last strength he could muster, he clambered up a rope ladder that some careless man had left hanging over the side and hoisted himself onto the ship’s deck. One of the crew noticed his sudden appearance and helped him to his feet. Ren stumbled over to Vushtek and related what happened, breathlessly.
Vushtek stared at him with growing alarm on his face.
“We can’t possibly leave the city with the Captain in the condition he’s in. We can only hope that Letor does not send us into the hands of the enemy, but trust me, if he does, we certainly won’t be taken without a fight!”
That was very comforting, Ren decided sarcastically, lying on a bunk an hour later. He didn’t want to be taken at all, with or without a fight!
Niria looked in. “Oh, you’re here,” she said, her voice heavy with anger and sorrow.
“Yes,” he said dully. Life had gone from bad to worse in the space of an instant.
“This is the stormmaster’s cabin,” said Niria, with a touch of accusation.
“The first mate put me here,” said Ren. “There was nowhere else.”
Niria’s expression made it clear that she disapproved, but there was nothing she could say or do about it.
“Well,” she said. “I am the stormmaster, since Tzil is dead. I will have to collect the necessary equipment. Don’t mind me.” And she busied herself with gathering up the instruments that littered the tiny cabin. Tzil certainly hadn’t been very tidy.
Ren turned his face to the wall.Tam lay in a half-awake stupor on the bed, until the smell of soup brought him to his senses. He sat up eagerly. The little child who had brought the soup bowed solemnly to him and left.
When he had finished he lay back down, ready to sleep for days if necessary. The time spent in the mind cells had been anything but refreshing, and now he was ready for some proper sleep.
But he was not to have it. The door opened and in walked Mordran, looking as benign as when Tam had first seen him. Behind the little man stood another, much taller, his hair a lurid and conspicuous violet. Rake Vashkar.
Mordran sat fluidly into one of the small, hard chairs that stood by the door. Vashkar did not sit in the chair beside Mordran’s, but Tam did not expect him to anyway. He didn’t think that Vashkar was the kind of person who was often seen in a chair.
Mordran had a calm, dangerous expression on his face.
“Do you have any idea how much you have damaged my plans?” he asked angrily. “You were seen on your way here. We would have captured a dangerous batch of pirates, along with that treacherous boy, Ren, if you had been more careful. Now we have lost our element of surprise. We have to risk open combat.”
Tam’s eyes grew wide in amazement. “Ren’s alive?” he asked in awe.
Mordran’s eyes flashed mercilessly. “Ren is no concern of yours.”
With that, he got up from his chair and headed toward the door. “You will be punished for your mistake.” He motioned to Vashkar and left.
Rake Vashkar grinned and cracked his knuckles. Tam’s face bore a look of pure horror.
“So, you thought you would make things better by running, did you?” Vashkar said in a tone that made it sound like he was talking about the weather.
“No, I-” Tam stammered.
Vashkar hit him on the side of the head, in a sudden burst of violence. “Don’t lie!” he hissed, spitting in Tam’s face. “We know everything that you’ve been doing since you left our presence last. Did you think we would let you wander around unchecked?”
“But I- I’ve come to help you,” Tam said feebly, recoiling.
“And this is the sort of help you’re going to offer? Revealing our general location to the one of the few people that would use that information to hurt us? A lot of help you are!”
He circled Tam, who cowered in the center of the tiny room, trying not to show his fear and failing miserably.
“If it wasn’t for Mordran’s orders,” he whispered hungrily. “I’d have more than half a mind to kill you, right now.”
Vashkar nodded silently to himself. Then he turned back to Tam again and said, “But I won’t. Instead, I will have to satisfy myself with giving you your first lesson in what happens to the servants of Mordran that fail him.”
Vashkar reached into his belt and pulled out a rather nasty knife. With a wicked grin, he grabbed Tam’s arm roughly and held it down. Tam struggled but he couldn’t get free. Vashkar grunted and swung the weapon with expertise. When he let go of Tam’s arm, Tam stared at his hand in disbelief. It was only when Vashkar had calmly left the room that Tam started to scream. A pitiful stump was all that was left of his right pinkie finger.
Who knows how long he sat there, staring at it, tears streaming down his face and blood pooling on the carpet? After what seemed ten years the door opened. The little girl who had brought him the soup looked in.
She made a small noise of disapproval when she saw what had happened, and the small pool of blood on the floor, but she did not seem surprised. She looked sympathetically at Tam, and then disappeared.
Half an hour later, the girl returned, and she brought a man with her. She pointed to Tam and ran from the room, pulling the door shut behind her.
The doctor did not look very qualified to be a doctor. His hair was disheveled and he was older than Tam’s great-grandfather. His clothes were not very clean, and there was no reason to suspect that his bandages were any cleaner. He looked at the blood, looked at Tam, and muttered something that sounded like, “Sailors.”
He crossed the room, picked up a pitcher of water, and dumped it over Tam’s hand in what Tam could only interpret as an attempt to clean the wound, or, more likely, to make the boy stop crying, because what actually happened was that Tam got absolutely soaking wet, and the room was suddenly awash with water.
The man disregarded this, and pulled from his coat pocket a roll of bandages, which he wrapped around Tam’s poor hand until it was almost as big as the boy’s head.
“There,” he muttered, while Tam sat on the wet floor, still in shock. “That’ll be four gold pieces.”
Tam stared at his hand stupidly. He looked up at the man with a look of confusion on his face.
“Four gold pieces,” the old man repeated slowly.
“I don’t have any gold.” Tam said dully.
The man stared at the boy with growing anger on his face. “You filthy brat! That was the last of my best medical bandages!”
Tam swallowed the observation that they had not looked like medical bandages. “Sorry,” he muttered.
The doctor’s face grew very red and suddenly he lunged at Tam, who tried to get away from the man but was instead tackled and held to the ground. The doctor savagely tried to rip the bloody bandages off Tam’s hand. Anger surged through Tam and a word phrase came to his mind. “Flamula Infenso Pilus”
Instantly, the doctor’s hair was ablaze. The man screamed in terror and ran from the room.
Tam looked cautiously at his hand. It was not damaged; the bandage was only slightly ripped. A few angry shouts were heard down the hall and Tam had a feeling that he wouldn’t be wanted anymore in the tavern. Without a backward glance, Tam went out the back door of the building and into the streets.
He ran, his hand throbbing faintly and words of power tumbling through his mind. It was all he could do, in the face of the pain and fear and hatred – such definite feelings, and welcome as respite from the constant uncertainty – not to yell them out, to burn the town to the ground, and himself with it. Something was wrong, something had happened, and Tam, in this strange confident state, could not see it. His feet carried him closer to the harbor, where he knew he would find the Sea Roc, and Captain Pye, and Ren, and the rest of the crew. And he would be safe there, safe from – there was a surge of pain through his hand, and a surge of realization through his mind. Them, he thought, and then the remains of rebellion and confidence drained away, leaving nothing but guilt and a deep, nagging, fear that something had gone wrong and it was all his fault. They were manipulating him still. Would he ever be free?Ren was awakened from his much-needed nap by a noise that at first, in his sleep-befuddled state, he could not identify. “Mmmm,” he mumbled. “Mustadozedoffsorry.” When the noise persisted, he said, louder and with more clarity, “I’m getting up. You don’t have to set off cannon in my ears.” With this half-asleep realization, Ren sat bolt upright and wide awake. “Cannon!” he gasped, horrified. “Oh no!” With a blatant disregard for the various stormmaster’s implements still scattered throughout the cabin, he rushed onto the deck.
It was not cannon, only muskets, and that was bad enough. A badly aimed musket ball whizzed past his cheek as he stepped onto the deck. He coughed at the harsh acrid smell of alchemical powder, and stood there blinking in the bright afternoon sun.
“Idiot!” hissed the first mate from Ren’s right, where he sat crouched beneath a bulwark. “Get down!”
Ren did as he was told, and scooted across the deck on his stomach. “What’s going on?” he asked the first mate.
“The harbor patrol had the brilliant idea to attack the pirates with muskets! I don’t know what put it into their heads, but there must be some reason. They usually leave us alone, since pirates make up the majority of the people who actually come to the Free Isles.”
“Oh,” said Ren, sighing with relief. He had been sure that it was the Empire, for a moment or two. Not that the harbor patrol was that much better.
The first mate continued. “I want you to go to the Captain’s cabin. Niria and the cabin boy are already there.”
Ren opened his mouth to protest at being shoved out of the way, but remembered that the first mate was in charge, and almost surrendered. He remembered his own status in time. “But sir-” he said. “I’m the powder monkey. Oughtn’t I to be doing something?”
The first mate shook his head angrily. “Powder monkey, indeed. You don’t still believe that, do you? You’re just in the way. Now GO!”
Ren obeyed without another word.
“Oh, it’s you,” said Niria coldly when Ren entered the room. She was sitting in a chair by Captain Pye’s bed, her face hard but her eyes frightened. When she saw Ren she turned away, a gesture that cut Ren to the quick. The sounds of the battle grew louder. They must have begun using cannon as well.
“Yes,” he mumbled. “Me.”
Arn leaped up from where he was sitting on the floor, and ran over to the other boy. “What’s going on?” he asked. “Who’s shooting at us? Why aren’t we allowed to help?”
“The harbor patrol,” explained Ren. “Supposedly we’re too young and would just get in the way.”
Arn’s expression grew dark, like a thunderstorm over the sea, and he, too, turned away from Ren. “The Captain would have let us help,” he muttered.
Ren had never felt worse.
But he didn’t have much time to feel bad, because there was suddenly a crunching sound from above, and someone yelled, and then the cabin door burst inward.
For a moment or two nothing more happened. No threatening figure strode through the gap, and the sound of fighting disappeared altogether. Ren, Niria, and Arn exchanged glances. Then Arn crossed the floor in one bound and leaped through the open door. With a guilty look at Niria, Ren followed.
The deck was a horrible mess. The mast had come down and nearly crushed a sailor. The deck was awash with blood and water, and not one of the crew of the Sea Roc was to be seen.
“Oh my,” said a faint voice from behind them. Niria had followed them onto the deck, and was staring with wide eyes at the carnage.
“No one’s left,” said Ren hollowly.
“That’s not true,” said a firm voice from the galley. “There are a lot of people left, but most of them are injured.”
“Vushtek!” cried Arn. “You’re still alive!”
“Yes,” said Vushtek gravely. “But you should leave now.”
“Why leave?” Niria asked. “It’s over, and you’ll need help.”
“It’s not over,” said Vushtek. “That wasn’t the harbor patrol, and they aren’t gone. I can’t leave the injured like this, but we can’t take chances.” At this he looked straight at Ren, and Ren wondered exactly how much the alchooktor knew. “Niria, you will take the boys to the city, and stay there.” Niria nodded mutely.
“Then go,” Vushtek said.
The three escapees crept carefully across the carnage on the vast deck of the Sea Roc. They made it to the bow of the ship with little difficulty and peered over the side. A line of soldiers stood on the dock in front of them. Each soldier was dressed smartly in a black uniform with a shiny badge on his chest. Ren watched them with growing unease. The faces of the men were so cold and emotionless that they seemed unreal.
Niria motioned impatiently for him to follow her lead and he turned to watch what she was doing. With unimaginable stealth, Niria slid under the ship’s railing and onto the side. Using handholds that were invisible to Ren, she climbed down into the water with not even a slight splash. Arn was already in the water, waiting for her. The two stared at Ren expectantly and he wondered what in the world he was going to do.
With a sigh, Ren braced himself and lowered himself clumsily over the side of the Sea Roc. His muscles strained as he searched frantically for a foothold. Finding none, he looked desperately over his shoulder. Niria and Arn were looking up at him in alarm. Ren scanned the side of the ship for a place that would assist him in his climb and saw a slight protrusion in one of the panels covering the ship to his right. Just as Ren rested his weight on the plank, the whole ship shuddered. Ren’s hands were violently thrown away from their hold and he fell with a loud splash into the harbor.
The trio watched in horror as the soldiers who had been standing silently moments before went into action. The attack on the Sea Roc had resumed! Niria determinedly tore her gaze away from the scene and motioned for everyone to swim away from the battle.Among all of the harbor patrol, no one noticed the three escapees except one lone monkey. It wore a grave expression on its face, even for a primate, as it bounded away to report to its master.
Vushtek stood guard determinedly over Captain Pye. The battle was not doing well for the crew. They were quickly losing the few men they had left. It would be only a matter of time before the ship was breached. Vushtek breathed slightly easier knowing that Niria and the others had escaped. At least Niria was safe.
There was a groan from the Captain’s bed and Vushtek ran to his side, alarmed. Captain Pye smiled weakly and patted Vushtek’s large scarred hand.
“Are they gone?” Pye asked.
Vushtek nodded slowly. He knew that Captain Pye was attached to the boy Ren, even though it had been the boy that had left him in this sickly state.
The Captain smiled painfully and relaxed. Vushtek returned to his post at the Captain’s cabin door.
Outside, things were not going well. The dwindling amount of men was turning disastrous. Vushtek braced himself as the several patrol men climbed aboard the Sea Roc. The men were immediately taken down by some of the remaining crew, but even more of the harbor patrol took the place of the dead. It wasn’t long before the entire deck was covered with fighting men.
Over the entire melee, Vushtek’s eyes only saw one man. The man wasn’t hard to miss because of his bright violet hair. He held his muscular body in a commanding way as he strode toward Vushtek. This man would NOT hurt Captain Pye. Vushtek’s eyes gleamed with the light of battle as he shouldered his axe. He had been around weaponry all his life. He didn’t even need to glance at his belt to know that his collection of butcher knives where hanging at his side.
The violet haired man noticed Vushtek’s reaction and drew his sword. With a yell, Vushtek lunged forward and butted the man in the face with the head of his axe. Blood streamed from the man’s broken nose and he slashed Vushtek’s shoulder in his anger. The attack continued furiously. The man kept trying to trick Vushtek into turning his back to the door of to the Captain’s cabin, but Vushtek kept defying him, much to the man’s anger.
Vushtek had been so preoccupied with the battle that he hadn’t noticed that the ship had become strangely quiet. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the remaining harbor patrol standing to attention on the deck. All of the other pirates were either dead or captured and tied to the mast. Vushtek’s attacks were now filled with the strength of desperation.
Suddenly, a powerful force hit him from behind and he fell to the ground. His hands were instantly bound by a clear, water-like rope. Vushtek chanced a look behind him and saw a man in a long dark cloak. He seemed to flow as he walked toward the violet haired man.
Vushtek’s eyes grew wide with recognition. The cloaked man stopped and kneeled at the feet of the man Vushtek had been fighting moments before.
“Master,” he said in a gurgly whisper. “The Fiery One has escaped with two others. They are headed toward the town.”
The violet haired man glanced at his servant, alarmed. He strode past Vushtek into the cabin but came back shortly with a scowl on his face.
“It’s just the captain! You are right my faithful servant, this battle has been for nothing. The boy is gone.”
“You are a fool Vashkar!” Vushtek yelled up at his captor. “Do you seriously think that Mordran will give you all the you desire? You are but a puppet in his hands, that he can dispose of whenever he wants!”
Vashkar looked down at Vushtek with disgust on his face. He turned to one of his commanders and said, “Take a force down to the village. Three crewmen have escaped the ship. One of them is a boy who goes by the name of Ren Splayr. Capture this boy alive and bring him to me. Kill the others.”
Vushtek’s eyes grew wide with anger. With a yell, he lunged at Vashkar, but the wave spirit was quicker. Vushtek had no chance. He fell face down on the deck of the Sea Roc, his eyes empty in death.Ren followed Niria and Arn through the streets of Jartuvi. He had no idea where they were going. He only knew that they were looking for a safe place where the Empire couldn’t find them. Arn pointed to a small tavern on the street and they walked inside. A gruff looking bartender stood at the counter and Niria went up to talk to him. Ren and Arn sat at a table and waited for her. The barman listened patiently for a while and then left for the back room.
Niria turned to them and shrugged. “He said that he needed to get something for our room in the kitchen.”
After several minutes, the man returned with a little girl. He sent her up a flight of stairs with some fresh sheets, supposedly for their room.
The bartender turned to the trio and said, “I suppose that you would like some drinks to calm yourselves after your journey.”
He rolled up his sleeves and looked at them expectantly. The three escapees however, were more interested in the tattoo on his arm instead of what he had to drink. Niria declined stiffly and steered the boys out of the bar. They strode briskly away from the bar with nervous expressions on their faces.
“When we reach the corner, run as if your life depends on it, because it does.” Niria muttered under her breathe.
Ren would have done just that, had it not been for the hordes of harbor patrolmen waiting for them around the bend. At their head stood a tall man in a black cloak. Letor.
“Oh no,” said Niria, her eyes not on Letor, but a smaller and more hunched figure standing behind the wave-spirit. “This is bad, very bad. Getting worse every moment.”
Ren and Arn glanced at her questioningly, but she said nothing. Her eyes, however, seemed to hold the light of hope, of a plan, and Ren relaxed ever so faintly.
“When I say so,” Niria murmured, “we are going to head back in the direction of the bar and go right in. Don’t worry about the bartender, because he’s whole lot less dangerous than the people who are looking at us right now. I can deal with him.”
Niria smiled confidently. Her plan was flawless. It could not fail.
“Good work, Scrimage!” she said triumphantly, “We have them exactly where we want them!”
Letor stiffened and glanced over his shoulder. Scrimage, the man who Niria had noticed before, seemed to shrink before Letor’s gaze.
Niria’s satisfaction grew. Everything had played into her hands, even the alignment of each captain’s troops. Letor, being the self-absorbed being that he was, couldn’t stand any troops but his own to march at the front of a formation. Consequently, all of the soldiers following Scrimage were forced to march at the back. This meant that all of Letor’s troops were trapped between Scrimage’s followers and Niria, along with Arn and Ren. Letor knew that he could possibly be in BIG trouble.
Scrimage probably noticed this too and his eyes grew as big as saucers. “No!” he squeaked. “There must be a mistake! I wouldn’t… I’d never…”
Letor’s eyes gleamed underneath his hood. “I knew the empire should have never trusted you! I knew that you were always really working for…” he paused hesitantly and hissed, “THEM”.
Scrimage trembled and a bead of sweat dribbled down his cheek.
Letor advanced toward Scrimage threateningly, saying, “Why else would you have given the enemy a copy of the Orb? Well, you won’t get away with it this time!” An evil grin twisted across Letor’s face. “I’ve been waiting for the moment to get rid of you for a long time!”
Scrimage shook his head and tried to stop Letor, but with to avail. Letor merely muttered a word under his breath and Scrimage exploded like a popped balloon.
This action created a surge through out the men. With a roar of anger, the troops turned on each other. The street was instantly transformed into a confusing mass of enraged soldiers. Clearly forgotten, Niria, Ren, and Arn quietly slipped away from the battle.
Ren followed Niria and Arn out of Jartuvi’s busy streets and into the tavern that had been originally their first stop. The barman looked up at them uncertainly from the counter as they sat down at a table close by.
What had just happened finally seemed to dawn on Ren and he sank heavily into a chair. “Wow.” he commented.
Niria nodded her head understandingly. “I agree,” she said, a little louder then usual. “It was a pity that Scrimage perished, but at least the plan ran smoothly. They did, after all, fall directly into our hands.”
Niria glared at Ren and Arn, demanding them to pick up on what she was doing.
The two boys had to stare at her for several moments before they got a vague idea of what was going on. Arn was the first to react.
“Yeah!” he exclaimed with a loud laugh, “Did you see the look on Letor’s face? He was furious! Who wouldn’t be after having half their troops destroyed in a surprise attack that was thought up by a few teenagers? I feel sorry for the spy that was “smart” enough to give him the information about our whereabouts!”
Ren hid a grin at the look on the bartender’s face.
Niria smiled and motioned for the rest of them to leave for their room.Ren heard a knock at their door an hour later. He paused and opened the door a small crack. The barman and the little girl they had seen earlier were standing in front of him. Reluctantly, Ren opened the door wider and gestured for the man and his daughter to come into the room.
The man strode gravely into the room and studied the faces of the three fugitives in front of him. Ren did not know how he should react to this man. He knew that the barman was a spy working for the empire, but he also knew that the man was only trying to make a living like everyone else.
The spy took a deep breath and began, “I know your situation with the empire. I also know that it will not be a good idea for you to remain in this area for much longer. Therefore, I have arranged for you to join up with a group of pirates who are by chance leaving shortly. They are similar to the last crew you were traveling with, seeing as they have an enormous price on their heads. I have no doubt that these fiends will assist you in your quest.”
A long shocked silence stretched over several minutes. Ren frowned suspiciously. “What’s the catch?” he asked.
The barman shuffled his feet shyly and continued, “I can not stay here. The empire is angry with me. It is best that I go into hiding.” At this, he took his eyes off his grubby feet and stared, pleading with them. “I am a failed parent, the places that I will be forced to go are not places for a little girl. I could not possibly put her in danger. I have given you a chance of escape from the empire, in return, you will care for my daughter.”
Ren’s eyes widened in alarm, though it was nothing compared to the expression on Niria’s face. She looked like was going to refuse, even though this was their only chance to avoid the empire. Ren quickly intervened and nodded gratefully.
“Of course, your daughter will be safe with us.” he said forcefully.
The barman smiled thankfully and left with his daughter. Ren nervously avoided making eye contact with Niria. He knew that she was furious with him.The pirate ship lay silent and majestic in the harbor sails furled. The flag was not flying from the masthead, and had it not been for the bartender’s assurance that this was the one, Ren would never have suspected that it was a pirate ship.
The bartender’s daughter let out a tiny sob at the sight of the man who came down the gangplank. Neither Ren nor Arn could comfort her, given their own feelings, and Niria uncomfortably leaned down to squeeze the little girl’s hand. “It’s alright,” she whispered, “and then stood up again.
The man was indeed frightening; his black hair was cropped short on his head but allowed to grow long on his chin, and where there had been streaks of silver, now there were streaks of crimson. He was dressed in a navy uniform, dyed the same black and red as his beard, and around his waist and across his chest and probably in his boots too were weapons. Knives, swords, pistols, and every other imaginable death-dealing object hung in plain view. Unlike the ship, this man made no attempt to conceal the fact that he was a pirate. His eyes were harder than granite, and a similar color, and when he came close enough, Ren realized with a shock that the smell of alchemical powder that had permeated the quay came from the pirate. He felt ill, and wished to be anywhere but there. Arn, on the other hand, was gazing up at the man with something akin to worship in his eyes. Ren turned away.
Niria drew herself up to her full height, and spoke to the pirate. “We wish to speak to the captain of this vessel,” she said clearly.
The man looked coldly at her. “I am he.”
Though Ren had no doubt that it was not normal procedure for a pirate captain to come and talk to people on the quayside himself, he was relieved that this was the captain, and that no one worse would be coming out of the ship. To judge by Niria’s expression, she was feeling much the same way as him.
She recovered her composure and said, “Since our own ship was destroyed by the harbor patrol, we are looking for a place on another.”
“I see,” said the captain. “And you hope it will be this one.”
Niria was about to speak, but Arn got there first. “Yes, sir!” he said, his face shining as though lit by a candle from within. The captain ignored him. Niria resumed her speech.
“I am a waveworker,” she said, “and the boys can both work.” When the captain made no move to accept, she began to clutch at straws. The straw she grabbed hold of first was perhaps the most effective. She lowered her voice considerably and put her hands over the little girl’s ears. Then she said, “We were on the Sea Roc, under Octavio Pye. The Krakeneater has been captured or killed, we cannot say which. But there was something he was looking for, a great treasure, and it is kept on the Blood Storm, which you surely know of. We must get that thing, and I assure you, when we do, you shall have a share.” To indicate that her speech was finished, she removed her hands from the girl’s ears.
The captain looked at her a long while, and then he said, “Come along then. But remember, I must get my share.”Somewhere far away, there were shouts and sounds of battle. Tam half-turned, but thought better of it and walked onward. He would go to the harbor and find the Sea Roc. Whether the Captain and crew would forgive him or not, he didn’t know, but he couldn’t go back to Mordran . . . His bandaged hand throbbed slightly, and he shook his head vigorously. If he had not borne a grudge towards the Empire before, he did now.
Then, as suddenly and as welcome as the sun breaking out of the clouds, the damp and smelly little alley opened up, and Tam found himself standing on the quay. The Sea Roc was not there. But then, that was understandable, seeing as she hadn’t been tied up in the first place, but anchored in the harbor.
But she wasn’t there either. Tam began to panic. They had sailed away without him! They had never known he was there.
Tam stared despairingly out at the idyllic harbor scene. Idyllic to anyone else looking on, but to the boy, it was something out of a nightmare.
He turned away. It was no good. He would have to go back to Mordran and the Empire after all, assuming they would take him back after what had happened.
Tam could not give up. He wandered aimlessly through the docks, looking desperately for any sign of The Sea Roc. He found none. The crowd at the docks slowly dwindled away and soon Tam found himself alone among the ships. It was only then that Tam noticed that the sun had disappeared over the horizon. What could he do? His only choice now would be to
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in July 12th, 2008 @ 13:10He turned away. It was no good. He would have to go back to Mordran and the Empire after all, assuming they would take him back after what had happened.
Tam could not give up. He wandered aimlessly through the docks, looking desperately for any sign of The Sea Roc. He found none. The crowd at the docks slowly dwindled away and soon Tam found himself alone among the ships. It was only then that Tam noticed that the sun had disappeared over the horizon. What could he do? His only choice now would be to return to the empire. Suddenly, Tam saw a man up ahead. Perhaps he would know where the ship was docked! He caught the man’s eye and hurried toward him. All hope was not lost!Jaroff leaned casually against a pole by the dock. It was his turn to take watch over the front of his ship, The Wavebreaker, in case there were any unwanted visitors. He doubted there would be. It was starting to get late and no one in their right mind would be wandering around the docks at this time of night. Well, maybe there were a few nutcases around. A boy had just walked into Jaroff’s line of vision.
Jaroff immediately disliked the boy. He was pale, as if he had never seen the light of day. It didn’t help that the boy looked as though he had no idea where he was going, a suspicious character.
It seemed that the boy had noticed Jaroff as well because he strode determinedly toward him. Jaroff scowled. The boy’s attitude was exactly like that of a noble’s. Jaroff despised nobles.
“Do you know where the ship called the Sea Roc is docked?” the “noble” asked commandingly.
Jaroff tried his best not to show his alarm. The boy was looking for the Sea Roc?! But that ship was now taken over by the empire! So, this little brat really WAS working for them! Anger boiled up in Jaroff’s stomach when he thought of the empire unexpectedly attacking the Sea Roc when the ship’s captain was injured. This was only yet another grudge he held against his country’s cursed government. Jaroff did not stop to think. He was determined that this little empire rat would not live to hurt anyone else.
“No,” he replied coolly, as his hand slid towards his belt, where a sharp dagger lay in its sheath, looking harmless. “I have no idea where she’s docked right now. I do know, though, that most of her crew is probably dead, and it’s in the hands of Empire scum – like you.” He had always wanted to say that to someone from the Empire, and as this brat was going to die within minutes, it didn’t matter what he heard.
Tam staggered back as though struck, and gasped, “I’m not!” But then the dagger sliced through the air, and Tam found that his eye was a mere inch away from a very sharp point.
“Don’t lie, empire scum,” hissed Jaroff, “or I’ll kill you slowly, not quick like I mean to.” The point withdrew, but now it was pointed at Tam’s throat, and a strong brown hand was firmly locked around a pale thin wrist. Tam let out a tiny sob of despair.
“Don’t kill me,” he said pleadingly. “I’m not from the Empire. I’m from the Sea Roc.”
Jaroff’s hard expression did not alter. “Then you’re a deserter,” he said. “And deserve to die as much as the Emperor himself. You might even be the one to have betrayed the Sea Roc yourself. If I was going to believe that, at least, and I don’t think I am.” The point was pressed against Tam’s neck a little harder. Not hard enough to draw blood, but hard enough for only a little more pressure to break into the vein.
Tam closed his eyes and waited for the inevitable death. At last I’ll be free from the Unknowables and the Empire then, he thought, and his mouth twisted slightly. It came to this, then. He was willing to accept Death for a little piece of quiet. What a mess.
But the fatal cut never came, and Death did not relieve Tam of his troubles.
“Jaroff!” said a hard voice. “What are you doing, man?”
The dagger dropped away from Tam’s throat, but the grip on his wrist did not lessen. “Killing this boy, sir,” came Jaroff’s steady reply. “He’s from the Empire, looking for the Sea Roc.”
Tam wanted to insist that he wasn’t, but suddenly he was too scared to speak. The figure now looming over him was enough to make a braver man than Tam feel weak at the knees.
“How do you know?” asked the captain of the Wavebreaker, stroking his black-and-red beard.
Jaroff stiffened. “Don’t you think, sir,” he said reproachfully, “that I can tell a ‘servant of the empire’ as well as the next man? He looks like it, sir. Acts like it, too.”
Tam was astonished. This Jaroff dared to talk back to his captain! Tam would have thrown himself overboard rather than attract the anger of this man with so many weapons.
“Yes,” said the captain of the Wavebreaker. “I agree. But what did you intend to do with the body?”
Tam shuddered to hear his imminent death spoken of so lightly.
Jaroff was still. “I don’t know, sir.”
“It will be noticed, if you aren’t careful. We will take this boy as a prisoner, and what we do with him later will be decided later. Come. And bring him with you.” And he turned and strode back onto the ship.
The thought of escape had not even occurred to Tam until he had reached the deck of the pirate’s ship. Unfortunately, Jaroff seemed to notice his reaction. Before Tam could turn and run, Jaroff slammed his fist into the boys head. Tam saw stars and collapsed on the deck.It felt good to be on a ship again, although a month ago he would have never admitted it. Ren grinned at Arn, who was swabbing the deck beside him. Arn returned his grin and continued working with renewed vigor.
The two had almost finished when a shadow stretched across the deck. The shadow belonged to the captain, whose name was known as Sharpnose, due to his rather large nose. Niria stood nervously behind him. Apparently this was important, because Niria was hardly ever allowed to leave her post as waveworker.
The captain motioned for them to follow him and he strode off across the ship. “New circumstances have developed on this ship,” he explained. “We have recently gotten a prisoner on board. He claims that he used to be a crewman on the “Sea Roc”.
Niria, Ren and Arn all seemed to stop walking at the same time. They stared at Sharpnose as if he had just muttered a death sentence, then they ran full speed to the brig. They threw open the prison door and stared in disappointment at the figure hunched miserably inside. There was no large tricorn-hatted, it wasn’t a strong, plump, cook, instead, it was a pale boy with a heavily bandaged hand. The boy lifted his head up and looked as if he wanted to speak, but he would have only been talking to a closed door. Niria had slammed the door in his face.
“Well?” asked Sharpnose. “Is he from the Sea Roc?”
“Yes,” said Niria shortly. Sharpnose waited. Niria still said nothing.
“And what do you wish us to do with him? Let him go free? Execute him?”
Niria’s eyes widened; Ren gasped. Even Arn looked slightly taken aback.
“He is a traitor?” questioned Sharpnose.
“Yes,” said Niria, looking away. “He is that.”
“So shall we execute him?”
Niria did not seem able to talk. Ren thought of Tam’s terrified expression, thought of him rushing through the trees to join the Empire’s men, and then he thought of being totally alone, the only one in all of Sphaere who had the power to work the Orb of Centaur.
“NO!” he yelled.
Sharpnose turned his hard eyes on the boy.
“Don’t kill him,” said Ren, feebly. “He’s got . . . he’s got to be kept alive. Captain Pye had a plan for him.”Tam shivered uncontrollably. The joy he once had when he had seen Ren was gone. In it’s place was an overwhelming dread. Ren had not been at all happy to see him. Everything had gone wrong. What would become of him now? Tam shuddered and surrendered his body to sleep.
Tam ran blindly in terror. Menacing shadows danced around him and he let out a bloodcurdling shriek. The fear was strong, so strong. Something grabbed his leg. Tam flailed and lost his balance, but did not hit the ground. Instead, he fell and fell through a dark, never-ending chasm. He heard distant voices calling to him at the bottom of the deep pit.
“The dark has taken us!” they cried. “Help us, lest you are taken as well!”
Tam cried out and covered his ears, frantically trying to shut them out, but they persisted.
“Release us!” they commanded. “Free us from the dark! This task has been yours since the beginning of time. It is now the moment to act!”
Tam panicked. The bottom was near; he could sense it! He twisted desperately around in midair and groped for some kind of handhold, but he found none.
“Do not be a fool, Tam,” another voice hissed. “Do not be a fool to choose death.”
Tam’s eyes widened in horror; a shadow moved below him as Tam neared the ground. He screamed. He was about to die.Ren jolted awake. His skin still prickled eerily after the glimpse of a stray dream he had just witnessed. He had seen Tam falling and . . . what was that thing? Whatever it was, it intrigued him. He guessed that Tam had been having these dreams for a long time. Well, if Tam was not going to act on them, then Ren would. He was going to get down to the bottom of this!
Ren slipped quietly out of his hammock and strode purposefully toward the brig. He opened the prison door with a slight creek and looked in. Tam was huddled up against the walls helplessly. After several hushed moments, Ren decided that Tam had not noticed that he was there, so he leaned over Tam’s still form and whispered, “Tam.”
Tam jerked up abruptly and stared at Ren hopefully. “Ren.” Tam exclaimed breathlessly. “I was so afraid that you had abandoned me. I . . .”
Tam’s voice died away as he looked at Ren. “No.” he said bitterly. “I do not know how, but you have seen my dream. I can see it your eyes. You have seen the endless torment that follows me wherever I go.”
Ren watched in astonishment as he saw Tam withdraw into himself before Ren’s own eyes. He had never seen anyone so despairing in his life.
“Tam.” he insisted. “What does it mean?”
Tam moaned and shook his head. “I do not know.” he groaned. “I do not know. They torment me, always torment me. Never can I escape, never. I’m trapped. I’m TRAPPED!” His last word was a fierce shriek and Tam jumped to his feet. Ren stared at him with growing concern on his face.
Tam now proceeded to shout into the thin air. It was as if Ren was no longer there.
“Who are these beings in your dreams?” Ren asked quietly.
“THEM!!” Tam screamed. “Who knows their name? They are those who are unknown. The unknown ones are forced away from this earth, so they must settle to destroy my spirit instead of my body. They are trying to DESTROY me!!” With a sob, Tam covered his face in despair.
“But, what do they want with you? What can you do for them?” Ren asked curiously.
Tam stared at Ren wildly for the first time during his rant. Ren shivered, for the look on Tam’s face was filled with pure hatred for those who tormented him. “They offer me peace and life but I know that the only thing that awaits me is death. DEATH! I will NOT do it! The Unknowables wish for me to bring them back to this world in which they were born but I am not a fool. They were banished by the clever one to a dark place and it is there that they will remain. They threaten me! HA! They are no one! They are the lost! What power do they have to send me to dwell in their dark domain! They have none! NONE!”
Tam proceeded to laugh maniacally and Ren turned and left Tam alone once more in the dark.
“Arn,” hissed Ren. “Arn! Where’s Niria?”
Arn rolled over, the hammock swinging wildly underneath him. “What? Niria?” he mumbled. “What’s th’ matter?”
“Tam’s gone mad!” said Ren. “I went to see him, because there was a dream-” he stopped short. Arn was looking at him as though he was mad.
“A dream? What are you talking about, Ren?”
“Never mind,” said Ren hastily. “But do you know where Niria is?”
“She got her own cabin ’cause she’s a girl, only she has to share with the kid.” Arn swung himself out of the hammock, fully clothed, and pulled on his cheap sandals. “C’mon, I’ll show you.”Niria’s cabin was a tiny room the size of a closet, that was tacked onto the Stormmaster’s cabin. Ren and Arn held their breaths as thy passed the Stormmaster’s sleeping form, but they located Niria’s door with no difficulty, and slipped into blackness worse than the starlit night outside.
Ren was almost into Niria’s room when Arn stopped so abruptly that it was all Ren could do to stifle a cry. Peering over Arn shoulder, Ren saw the strangest sight he had ever seen.
Niria lay upon the bed of the barman’s daughter. The little girl had obviously been upset because there were tear stains on her cheeks. Niria was humming softly and rocking the young girl’s head back and forth.
Ren was amazed. This was the girl who had despised him for weeks? He had never seen this side of her! Ren and Arn lurked in the door of Niria’s cabin until the barmen’s daughter was asleep and Niria had stood up form the bed.
Arn knocked comically on the door and strode into the room as if he had just arrived. Niria stiffened self-consciously and nodded a greeting.
Arn took a deep breath. “Ren told me that he needs to tell you something.” he motioned to Ren nervously. Obviously, Arn knew that Niria had little pathience for Ren.
Ren fidgeted awkwardly and began.
“Tam’s gone mad,” he said.
Niria’s expression did not change. She twitched her right index finger, however, in a manner that Ren interpreted as “go on.”
Ren sat on the bed with his hands beneath him. Niria eyed him icily as he took this liberty, but Ren didn’t notice. He was to busy trying to marshal his tumbled thoughts into a coherent sentence.
“I was getting scraps of his dreams,” he said cautiously.
Niria raised her eyebrows, and Arn let out a whistle. The bartender’s daughter stirred in her sleep.
Niria looked daggers at Arn, who bit his lip and mimed, “sorry.”
Ren, feeling some explanation was needed, said, “Tam and I are . . . different. Some people have alchemical talent and some people have water power and some people have wind power.”
Here Niria closed her eyes and a pained expression crossed her features. Ren plowed on. “Tam and me have FIRE power. We’re the only two people that do have fire power, and that’s why Captain Pye-” he faltered.
“Never mind about Octavio Pye,” said Niria harshly. “I know your unique powers. Get to the point.”
Ren blushed furiously. “Well,” he hastily, “I got Tam’s dream, and it was really scary. So I went to see Tam, and he was MAD! Really crazy! He said the Unknowables-” Ren stopped. “I think he said the Unknowables kept telling him to restore them to their old power, but he won’t do it, because they’ve been torturing him. So he’s just making it worse for himself, and he’s going mad.”
“Ah,” said Niria.
Silence.
“I think we need the Orb of Centaur,” said Ren uncertainly, when the quiet became torturous.
“Yes,” said Niria. “Yes.”
It wasn’t until after the second silence, longer than the first, that Ren noticed an emptiness in the air next to him. Arn was gone.
Neither Niria nor Arn said anything for a moment, but then fear both for and of the cabin boy surged through Ren, and he turned panic-stricken features on Niria, who looked equally terrified.
“I think we can trust Arn,” she said, but her voice was dry and she got to feet. “But we might want to find him anyway.”
Ren could not have agreed more. He sneaked a glance at Niria as they crept softly out of the tiny cabin, and she returned it with none of the hatred she usually directed toward him. It was driven out of her mind by concern.Arn stood outside the captain’s cabin, his heart thumping a thousand times a minute. There was no noise from within, but that didn’t mean Sharpnose was not inside, waiting to leap on young thieves. I’m a thief, Arn realized, and without further ado he pushed open the heavy oak door.
The cabin was as silent inside as out. Sharpnose was slumped across a table, fast asleep. A tidy stack of charts lay at his elbow, and a compass.
Arn’s breath left his body with a slow whoosh, and his muscles relaxed. No worries here. He would get a knife, do the deed, and go back to bed. No one would know until the morning, and Niria, if not Ren, was sure to agree with him. No one would care much if a traitor died, and they would be safer without an Empire spy on the ship.
He crossed the room with exaggerated care, never making a sound, and stood by the pirate captain, looking for the perfect weapon-preferably one that Sharpnose wouldn’t feel being removed from his person.Ren shivered uncomfortably. They had searched to no avail. Arn was nowhere to be seen. Niria shook her head wearily for the tenth time in the last hour.
“He’s not here either.” she lamented. “That can only leave one more possibility.”
Ren looked up at her abruptly. “What do you mean?”
Niria scowled at Ren and said, “He’s with Tam.”
With that, she whirled around and headed toward the brig. Ren followed her hastily.Tam didn’t know what to think. Ren had come to see him hadn’t he? That meant that Ren cared about him, right? Tam shivered uncontrollably. He reminded himself that it wasn’t he, himself that Ren cared about, it was about the dream that they had shared. Ren’s reaction had frightened Tam. Ren hadn’t seemed frightened of the Unknowables, in fact, he had seemed enthusiastic about them!
Tam jolted out of his thoughts at the sound of a silent creaking of a door hinge. A shadow moved in the dark and Tam craned his neck to see.
“Ren?” he called.Arn cursed himself inwardly. The door to the brig was old and not used to being opened regularly. He should have guessed that it would make a slight noise. Perhaps…no, he had been heard. A figure stirred in the darkness and called out. Arn closed his eyes momentarily. He couldn’t stop to think. If he did, then he might back out. Arn squared his shoulders and stepped into the shadows.
Niria jogged desperately across the ship’s deck. She feared the worst for Arn. Niria had almost reached the brig when she heard a voice, “Ren?”
Niria looked over her shoulder and saw Ren clumsily trying to keep up with her. This would have been a laughing matter, had the situation not been so serious. She turned back toward the noise and barely glimpsed Arn’s receding figure walking into the prison.
“Arn!” she cried, alarmed.
She ran toward the dark jail cell. A surprised gasp was heard from inside and Niria closed her eyes, expecting the worst. A strange sight awaited her.
When Niria stepped inside the brig, she did not see Tam lying dead on the ground and Arn standing guiltily over him. Instead, she saw the captain, Sharpnose, grunting and holding Arn in a forceful headlock. Ren came in, puffing, behind her and stared in surprise at the scene before them.
Sharpnose pried a knife out of Arn’s hand and cleaned it expertly on his nightshirt. The captain motioned toward Arn and said, “Your friend here stole my knife. That was a mistake.” he twirled his knife expertly in his hand. “Your friend also tried to kill an innocent and unarmed victim. That was another mistake.” he flipped his knife into the air and caught it with ease. “Your friend will not make another mistake, yes?”
Niria sucked in her breath, alarmed. Sharpnose took his knife in his hand and grabbed Arn’s head roughly. Ren moaned and Niria covered her face. With one swift stroke, Sharpnose chopped off the multitude of hair that Arn had been cultivating for months. Arn’s eyes rolled to the back of his head and he slumped onto the floor in a faint.
Niria let out her breathe and knelt beside Arn worriedly. The captain merely shrugged and said, “Well, it was my best knife after all.” Sharpnose bent over Arn’s still form, picked him up, and carried him back to the forecastle.Niria Tolmark lay in her bunk, trembling all over. The tense and frightening events of the night were making it impossible to sleep. The water slapped against the side of the Wavebreaker, and Niria’s power responded with a surge of longing. It had been ages since she’d worked the waves–three weeks? Four?
The bartender’s daughter shifted in her sleep, and Niria sighed. There would be no getting up to play with the sea while the girl slept. What a shame . . .
Niria’s eayes closed, and she sank into slumber.The sun shone brightly on the top of Ren’s head as he scrubbed the deck, but there was nothing bright about his mood. For the past fortnight, he had been tomented nightly by Tam’s nightmares. It wasn’t FAIR! They weren’t his, and he shouldn’t have to bear them. But while the nightmares made Tam hate the Uknowables, they made Ren, looking at it from a different perspective, want even more to save them.
“What’s the matter, Ren?” asked Arn on his way across the heaving deck. He was growing out his hair again, and it reached below his ears. He had trimmed it with Niria’s knife (and without her knowledge) the day before, and was fond of swishing it around his ears.
“Nothing,” said Ren, trying to put on a cheerful face. After the last incident, he had not told Arn of the nightmares.
“Alright,” said Arn. He started across the deck again. Ren watched him and sighed. Arn was so carefree, as if he had never tried to murder an innocent man, never been near to death himself.
“Oh well,” he said, the words the opposite of his temper, and gave the deck an extra vicious scrub.Niria bit her lip and leaned across the table. “That won’t work,” she objected. “We want to go south, towards Hermetopolis. I’m sure that’s where the Blood Storm is. I’m sure.”
“You can’t be sure,” said the Stormmaster. “There is no way to be sure.”
“Oh . . .” said Niria faintly. The man was right. She really didn’t know. But they had to go somewhere! As much as she hated to say it, she had to. “Sir . . . with all due respect . . .” She swallowed her words. Pirates never kept spies, that was for the dishonorable Empire, and it would be an insult indeed to imply that a pirate Stormmaster could send out his creatures of air or water to find an enemy ship.
Oh, Tzil, thought Niria miserably, under the stony gaze of the Wavebreaker’s Stormmaster. Why did you have to go, Tzil? You would understand.
Maybe. He hadn’t been entirely sound in those last moments. Sure, Niria hated Tam with a fiery passion herself, but to try to kill him was merely foolish! Anyone could tell the boy was brim-full of dangerously suppressed power.
Poor Tzil, thought Niria. Was he mad?A small, scruffy girl scrubbed pointlessly at an old, cracked plate. It was no use. The grime had remained on the plate for too long. Whatever the gunk had once been, it was now perfectly molded into the dish. The girl shoved the plate onto the top of a steeply growing pile with disgust.
“Hey, Mute!” a nasally voice called from a back room, “I need a hand here!”‘
“Mute” gratefully left the tower of dishes and shuffled into the cupboard to help the ship’s cook. The cook was a rather thin man with a large nose and several wispy strands of hair that hadn’t managed to fall out of his head yet. The young girl had to hide a laugh when she walked into the cupboard. The cook was trying to hold a box full of dried herbs that was twice his size. The man’s neck craned wildly over the box in an attempt to see her. This slight movement made the man sway precariously and his legs trembled as if they were about to collaspe.
“Mute” smiled and gently releived the ship’s cook of his burden. She carried the box into the main kitchen with only a small strain of exertion. The ship’s cook followed her, shaking his head.
“You young people!” he exclaimed. “You think that you’re immortal don’t you?! Well, you know what? Someday, you’re going to loose your strengh! Everything ages! Everything eventually dies! You just wait! You’ll see!”
The girl smiled, amused. The cook could never rest unless he had something to rant about. “Mute” nodded at the cook agreeably. She knew that the cook could talk for hours if he thought that you disagreed with him.
The cook stared at her suspiciously but made no comment. Instead, he turned to the sink. “Oh my!” he said, “You haven’t finished the dishes!” “Mute” shook her head shyly. “Well, I suppose that I could finish them. Young people should be enjoying the outside anyway!” The girl grinned happily and thanked the old man. He waved her away and went to work. “Mute” skipped out the kitchen door and onto the deck. A whole evening of freedom! What fun!
A inviting ray of sun glinted merrily against the deck of the Wavebreaker. The eyes of the bartender’s daughter lit up and she ran past the hordes of busy sailors to the front of the ship. Her mouth open in a silent cry of joy, she leaned excitedly over the ship’s railing, letting the wind blow her hair behind her. There was no other feeling, none in the world, that was more wonderful then the feeling of the fresh, salty air of the ocean running through her body! She could stand there forever, and still be content if she had the chance. With this thought, the girl frowned and turned her back to the wind. No, she could never stay here forever, not when Papa was somewhere else, far away.
A movement in the distance caught her eye, and the girl turned back to look out over the sea. A large, black shape was flying toward the Wavebreaker at an intense speed. The imposing figure aproached, and ,to the girl’s amazement, it landed with a soft “thump” on the figurehead at the bow of the ship. The creature was a strange, somewhat unreal, form of raven. Without a moments hesitation, the bird sqawked and transformed into a shorthaired cat.
Her eyes expanded in both surprise and alarm and the girl opened her mouth to scream, yet, of course, she could not suceed in getting anything to excape her lips. The cat looked up and saw her. With an unexpected purr, it jumped up onto the railing the sidled up to the girl. It let out an amused “meow” and walked straight past her, flicking her lightly on the nose with it’s tail. With an annoying air of cockiness, it turned around, spat, and tranformed once more into a lizard. The creature skurried hurriedly out of sight.
The girl stood there, speechless, for several seconds before what had happened sank in. She jolted upright and ran toward the main part of the ship. She had to tell someone about what had just transpired!Niria was lost for words. How could she possibly convince the Stormmaster to listen to her? However, Niria’s train of thought was stopped by a slight tugging on her sleeve. A young girl stood before her with an alarmed expression on her face. Niria bent down beside the girl with concern.
“Are you all right? Is something wrong?” Niria asked.
The girl nodded her head furiously and motioned toward the bow of the ship. Niria jogged worriedly in the general direction of where the girl had directed.
The sight that met Niria’s eyes was nothing like she’d had in mind. There was nothing there, nothing. Niria frowned and turned expectantly toward the girl, who had followed her. The little girl gave Niria a pleading look and attempted to make several complicated hand motions as an explanation.
Niria sighed and shook her head. She knew that the bartender’s daughter did not belong in a world of pirates and that she often got lonely. Niria bent down and took hold of the little girl’s shoulders.
“I’m sorry, but you know that I’m busy right now. We can spend some time with each other tonight, alright?” Niria promised.
The girl opened her mouth, as if to say something, but nothing came out. Niria smiled sadly and left the girl, standing alone at the bow.A middle-aged man sat professionally at his desk, steadily writing on a thick peice of parchment. He did not even stop to look up from his work when a small, bony man entered his office. An intense silence came upon the room, so that the only sound was the continuous scraching of the pen. The intruder wringed his hands nervously as a bead of sweat ran down his nose and said “Umm…mmm…mmm Ahem sir”. His last words came out in a high pitched sqeak, making his addressor’s whiskers twitch, his only sign of acknowledgement.
Apparently, this acknowledgement was sufficient because the boney man continued. “C-c-c-captain, I…… I ……..I .. I ……I ..I ..I …….I ……….”
The man lasped into a brief silence when the Captain raised his hand for quiet.
“You wish to know the whereabouts of a certain prisoner of war.” the Captain said expectantly.
“Y-y-yes sir!” the bony man replied.
“We found difficulties during questioning and he has been dealt with accordingly.” the Captain explained.
The intruders pale face turned slighty pink. “But…but….that….that’s not…… he was my………”
The Captain raised his head abruptly and examined the man with a slow, confident smile. “Are you questioning my authority Jeremier?”
Jeremier became flustered.”I….I was only suggesing sir th..th..that any influencial information extracted would…. would be most helpful to…..to my……re..repu..pu..tation.”
The Captain’s eyes glittered maliciously. “Any information that was found is in good hands, mine.”
Any other move of protest escaped the Jeremeir’s mind as the Captain stood up.
“I would appreciate it if you would show yourself out of my office, Jeremeir. Good day to you.”
With a pitiful whimper, Jeremeir hurried out of the Captain’s presence, closing the door carefully behind him.The prisoner leaned back against the chilly wall of the cell. He flicked what may have been a dead rodent away from him, and sighed. Three days since the last glimpse of light in this cell. Oh, he hated this.
Even as he thought that, a door burst open somewhere above him, letting a glimmer of light through a chink in the stone. The prisoner basked in the pathetic ray, and hope flooded through his bones.
But the light was not all that penetrated the cell’s wall. There was also a sound, a voice protesting. “Let go of me! I am –”
“You can shut yer mouth, whoever you are.”
The prisoner crept closer to the chink and put his eye to it. But the sudden light blinded him and he pulled back, unable to see.
After several excruciating minutes, the prisoner’s eyes adjusted again to the blackness that had returned over the cell once more. He leaned forward and listened to the silence coming from the opposite cell. Slowly, yet surely, a pitiful moan could be heard coming from the newcomer. It was a sound that came only at a time of deepest despair, a time when one’s vision was clouded with misery and the mind gave way to dark wanderings. It was a sound that had reached the prisoner’s ears all too often.
Once the silence had returned, the prisoner put his mouth up to the hole in the wall.
“Hey, stranger!” he said “Have you got anything on ya?”
A muffled gasp came from the other side of the wall and then a raspy voice answered him. “I was searched after I was captured.”
Swearing, the prisoner pounded his fists against the wall in frustration. He turned desperately toward the hole in the wall again and pleaded, “Come on, have a heart! Could ya by any chance have some tobaccy up ya sleeve that them theiven dogs didn’t sniff out?”
The prisoner’s plea was only answered with a tired laugh, a sound rarely heard in the dungeons. It lifted the prisoner’s head and brought a smile to his lips.
“Friend,†he said truthfully, “laughter in this place is more priceless then all the gold of the world.”
He reached his hand through the hole. Another hand, one that had seen many days and had known a great deal of hard labor, met his own and they shook heartily.
“Ma name’s Jack Swinely.”the prisoner introduced.
“Well met.” the newcomer acknowledged. “I am known as Pye, Octavio Pye.”
“Nice to meet ya,” said Swinely, “though there could be nicer places ta meet.”
Octavio Pye sighed. “I quite agree.”
“So,” said Swinely, making conversation, “how did ya come ta be here?”
“I don’t rightly know,” said Pye. “I wasn’t conscious when it happened.” He sounded sad. “And you?”
“Eh,” grunted Swinely. “Ya don’t wanna know.”
“Are you sure about that?” Octavio moved a little closer to the wall to counter Swinely’s quiet voice. “I’ve had my share of unlawful deeds, you know.”
“Ah don’t wanna think about it, then. Ah never should’ve gone to the city. Too close ta the blasted ocean. Ah should’ve known.”
“Know what?”
“The Emperor was stronger than I though he would be,” he said, staring at the ceiling. “Ah lost everythin’.”
“Ah,” Octavio said, nodding. “It appears to be the same for everyone. It’s a pity that those in the city can’t see all of us prisoners and hear our stories, or we’d be able to get a rebellion against the Empire faster than the swish of a sword.”
“That’s what we’d all like ta think, isn’t it?”
“Don’t you think so?”
“I dunno what I think. Sometimes I think I might get out of here before I die, and sometimes I think there’s no chance.”
“Oh, you might very well get out before you die.” This was said so sarcastically that Jack couldn’t help but feel that Mr. Pye wasn’t being nearly as optimistic as the words implied.
“And?” Jack said, wondering if there was more behind the words.
“Look, how long have you been in here for?” Octavio said, chuckling grimly.
“A while…” he said suspiciously.
“That explains it, don’t it?” Octavio said, nodding. “The world’s changed a lot for the worse in the past decade. The Empire is stronger than ever, and eerily enough, more people trust the Emperor as well. Sometimes I wonder if life might be better off if I just gave in.”
“If you gave in, the only thing that would change is whether or not ya kept on planning an escape. When ya get to this point, there’s no difference between resisting and giving in, but ya sleep better if ya pick the latter.”
“Oh, but I can’t give in. There are too many people I need to see fulfill their destinies. I’ve got to get OUT!”
“We’ve all got to get out, Mr. Pye, and yelling about it ain’t gonna make a difference. If ya yell the guards come, and we don’t want that.”
Octavio sank back, muttering. “If I hadn’t tried the Bonding, none of this would have happened. I should have listened to Niria.”
Jack heard this, but he did not ask questions. All prisoners had their secrets, and from the despair he could hear in the other man’s voice, he could tell he had no right to intrude on this one.
There was a long pause, and then finally Octavio spoke again.
“So,” he said, his voice heavy with weary. “What do we do now?”
The avid conversation abruptly ended. Jack thought about Octavio’s question with a furrowed brow. What would they do? What had he been doing for the past years? He had been sitting in this same room, brooding in the dark. He could not count how many times he had thought of escape, but those thoughts had simply been dreams, false hopes to make up for his inactivity. Now that this new stranger had put this question to him, he couldn’t think what to say. Maybe, just maybe . . .
“I think that we can do it.” Jack said with baited breath.
“Do what?†asked Octavio.
“Escape.†Jack’s voice was full of excitement.
“But how? Do you have a plan?â€
“Not as such,†admitted Jack. “But if we put our heads together, we could probably think of somethin’. Are you an alchemist?”
“No,” said Octavio. “No. Why?”
“I am,” said Jack, as though he were a child with a secret.
“Really?” Captain Pye had encountered hundreds, if not thousands, of alchemists. He had learned that everyone had some alchemical power, if not a lot. He was not impressed, but he saw no harm in listening to his fellow prisoner.
“Yep. That’s why I’m here, in fact.”
“Really?” Now he was slightly intrigued. The Emperor didn’t usually put people in prison simply for having alchemical power. Old Sanguinus IV, in fact, had been a notoriously powerful alchemist.
“Yep. I was . . . well, let’s say I wasn’t the most law-abidin’ of citizens. I worked for a man, an’ he wasn’t too law-abidin’ either. Now I had no idea I was an alchemist up until one day when I accidentally turned some little trinket into pure gold. This was a mighty shock to me, and I never woulda told anyone, but this man I was working for, he saw. He told me to do it again, and when I couldn’t, he got pretty mad. An’ I thought it was over, and I’d best get outa his sight, so I boarded the nearest ship and left the city. And then a few days later, this nasty big boat came and they talked to the captain and said I was wanted for smugglin’, and the captain he turned me over – Lord knows what they payed him for it – and here I am, and I’ve been here for goodness knows how long. And there ya have it.”
“I see.” Captain Pye frowned in concentration. A plan was beginning to hatch at the back of his mind.
“What’r you thinkin’ of?” Jack said suddenly, looking suspicious.
“Out of curiosity,” Captain Pye said, ignoring the question. “Do the guards know what each man was put in jail for?”
“Of course,” Jack said solemnly. “That way dey know how well ter guard us.”
“Perfect,” Captain Pye said, rubbing his chin. “What if you were to tell that guard right there that if he let us out you would turn the bars of this cell into gold for him? Do you think he’d believe you?”
“Maybe,” said Jack doubtfully. “But he’s probably trained to look out for stuff like that.”
“But it can’t hurt to try,” said Octavio.
“All right,” Jack said slowly as though agreeing to a death sentence. “But you have to do all the talking.”
“Hey, guard!” Pye said, motioning with one chained arm. “C’mere.”
The guard warily took a few steps towards them, and then a few more when Pye continued to beckon furiously.
“What?” he said roughly. “Did someone die?”
Pye smiled. “No, no. But we have a proposal to make.”Ren woke from another of Tam’s nightmares. He lay with his eyes closed, feeling the fear drop away to be replaced with anger. Always anger. Why couldn’t Tam’s dreams stay in Tam’s head? Why couldn’t he just help the Unknowables like they wanted? It wasn’t fair.
He sat up and swung his feet out of the hammock, sticking them into his worn sandals. The forecastle was stuffy and filled with the snoring of the crew. Maybe he would go talk to the watchman.
The air on deck was comfortably warm, and the moon and stars were obscured by the heavy, humid clouds. Ren started towards the watchman, but then changed his mind and headed in the other direction instead. He wasn’t in the mood for conversation.
He leaned on the railing and stared out into the blackness. He whispered a word and small flame sprang up in hand. This was a trick he had mastered over the past week, and he felt slightly guilty whenever he tried it. He could just imagine Captain Pye’s disapproval, telling him of the wounds the fire could inflict, or Niria’s cold glare at the boy whose uncanny powers had nearly killed her captain and who had driven her friend to insanity.
He sighed miserably and extinguished the flame, but then it flickered back to life, and he found himself staring into the eyes of a large black-and-white bird. A stormy petrel.
He jerked back, and suddenly the railing was aflame. He realized what he had done and the fire went out. He prayed to the Unknowables that the watchman had not seen the light.
And the bird was no longer a bird, now it was a tall figure clad in dark blue and smelling of seawater.
The figure moved in front of Ren, blocking the rest of the ship from Ren’s sight. The cloak swirled across the deck, reminding Ren of wisps of smoke. The visitor leaned in and let out a gurgling whisper. “Greetings fire bringer.†it said. “I have brought hope to your totally hopeless existence.â€
Ren’s eyebrows raised and he crossed his arms. “Somehow, I seriously doubt it.†he said.
The figure ignored this comment and continued. “The great Mordran has a proposition for you. All charges, including any on your family or any other close relation, will be lifted from your name if you agree to all terms laid down by the empire’s most trusted official, the great Mordran.â€
Ren’s eyes grew wide with astonishment. They were certainly offering a lot! All he would have to do was agree, and afterward, he and all of his friends and family could have a relatively normal life. But at what cost?
Ren’s thoughts were interrupted by a shout from the opposite side of the ship. The guard must have seen his fire after all!
The cloaked figure turned toward Ren once more. “I will be waiting.†it hissed, and turned once more into a raven. It disappeared just as the watchman arrived. The man ran up to Ren, panting. “I, I saw fire on the deck!†he gasped. “What, what happened?â€
Ren smiled reasurringly. “It’s OK sir. I have it under control.â€
The guard stared at Ren curiously. “Well, †he relented, “if you’re sure…..â€
Ren nodded enthusiastically and the man shrugged. “OK then. I’ll guess I’ll get back to my post.†With that, the guard left the area.
Ren let out a sigh of releif and turned back toward the ocean. He craned his neck but could see no sign of his visiter. Ren shook his head. He could not possibly agree to Mordran’s wishes. If he did, the consequences would haunt him for the rest of his life.
Ren paced along the deck, his eyes closed, trying to block out the signs that another of Tam’s nightmares would soon be sent his way.As Ren tried to avoid the darkening presence in his mind that was Tam and Tam’s nightmares, nobody else was having a good time either. On the deck of a dark ship, two gleaming eyes broke the darkness. Suddenly something broke the silence – well, not really. The sleek white figure burst into the moonlight, and looked at the stars. She knew something was about to happen.
After a moment or so, she was proved right. A thought tickled her mind, and she enveloped it, letting it in. “What is it?†she breathed with her mind. “Who is this?
“Alexis,†the voice said, with a hint of desperation. “Marmalade, we need to help Ren and Tam.â€
“Why?†Marmalade said, bowing her head slightly. “My master is Captain Pye. He needs help more than the human children.â€
“Marmalade, everyone knows that two Pukises are better than one,â€
“True, but what about your children?â€
There was a long pause, before Alexis continued, her voice cracked with sorrow.
“They’ve been taken,†she whispered. “By the Empire. I’ve got to find them too, but my gut tells me I will find them where I find Ren. Please help me, Marmalade.â€
Marmalade’s thin body slipped back into the many shadows on the deck. “I will think about it,†she said, her voice travelling over miles and miles to echo hollowy in Alexis’s head. “I will think.â€Dark shadows lingered on the floor of the ship. No movement stirred the night; only the calm motion of the ocean waves could be heard in the stillness. Ren sat motionless, his eyes fixed on a distant point, his breathing slow and deliberate, the back of his neck coated with sweat.
A breeze brushed past the boy and the shadows flickered. Ren flinched uncomfortably and twitched his fingers one at a time, as if stretching out any stiff joints. Out of the shadows stepped a menacing figure, dressed in a flowing, black cloak.
“I see you have been waiting for me.†the figure hissed. “Have you made you decision?â€
Ren shifted in his seat, “I have made a descision, yes.â€
The cloaked figure moved forward eagerly. “I trust it is the correct one.†it gurgled.
Ren nodded slowly. “I believe it is.†he assured.
With a shout, the room was flooded with light. Crew members flooded into the room from all directions, surrounding the boy and the wavespirit.
“How dare you defy the might of the empire!†the wavespirit screeched. “You will pay dearly with your lives!â€
With a roar, the figure shriveled the disappeared through the floor.
A great cry arose among the men. “Search the ship!†a gruff voice yelled. “It can’t have gone far!â€Darkness. Darkness. Can’t escape. Must escape!
Pleading voices echoed in Tam’s head. “Help us Tam!†“Set us free Tam!â€
“Nooooo!†Tam screamed. With a shriek, he fell. And fell. And……….
Tam awoke with a start in the darkened dungeon. He warily wiped the tears and sweat off his face. Yet another night with the same horrifying dream. Or, at least, he thought it had been a night. It was hard to tell anymore the difference between night and day in the darkness of the ship’s (hold?).
The shadows twisted in the room and Tam briefly saw movement in the corer of his eye. Before he could turn around, a hand grabbed him from behind.
“Tam,†a voice murmured behind him. “I found you just in time. The empire has come back for you. I’ll take you out of this situation in a minimum amount of time.â€
Tam stared curiously as the darkened figure hastily unbound him. This was all happening so fast! Tam weighed his options. He could stay with the ship and most likely sit in a dungeon until pirates killed him, or he could go back to the empire, where he might have a chance at escaping before anything too terrible occurred. The wavespirit stood up, headed toward the entrance, and impatiently waited for Tam.
†Now boy!†it ordered gruffly.
Tam hesitantly stood as well and joined the wavespirit. He would set his chances with the empire.
The wave spirit took Tam by the hand, as the boy began to hear voices and pounding footsteps above his head. “What’s happening?†he asked, sounding small and frightened even to himself. “How are we going to get off of here?â€
The wave spirit said something in a gurgly whisper, and Tam felt the clasps around his ankles melt away, and then he found there was light from a phlogiston lamp shining in his eyes, and he blinked once, twice. He was staring into someone’s familiar eyes. And it wasn’t someone he wanted to ever see again.
“Well,†said Tera. “Look who it is.â€Alexis opened her blue eyelids one by one, and stretched out her long, furry body in common cat-like fashion. She looked around her place of rest – an island, far from any known human civilizations, that she had settled on to rest from her fruitless search for her young, and Ren as well.
Suddenly she heard a faint noise in her head. At first she stiffened, but then she relaxed as she recognized Marmalade.
“I have decided,†Marmalade said, her voice hard with resolve.
“What?†Alexis whispered, suddenly feeling faint with worry.
Marmalade paused for a long while, causing Alexis to bat at her tail to keep herself from jumping into the sea in anxious despair.
“I will help you.â€
“Really?†Alexis said, breathing a sigh of relief. “When? How?â€
“Meet me on Lithuslov in two days time. Even Pukis thought communications are no longer safe from the Empire. We must talk face to face.â€
“Two days? I am much further than two days journey from Lithuslov, even if I don’t stop to eat or rest at all.â€
“You’ll find a way, Alexis, or else Ren and your young will not be receiving assistance from me.â€
Alexis was quiet for a moment as she weighed the pros and cons.
“Marmalade,†she finally said. “We have not always been the best of friends, but I know noone else to turn to. I will come, and even if I am too late, I hope I will find someone who can help me. Thank you.â€
“It’s the least I can do.â€
The sun shone brightly, glittering on the brilliant blue sea. It was hard to believe that anything could be wrong on such a day. The sky overhead was cloudless, and a stiff breeze played buffeted the blue Pukis. Her wing were sore, her scales salty from the spray, but she was close to Lithuslov. Oh! So close! Although her two days had ended the night before, she flew on now simply because she must reach land.
And reach land she did, three hours later, and collapsed on the warm rocks and sand of a sheltered cove, too tired to shape-change, too tired to move, too tired to think. And she slept.
Her sleep was broken by a voice in her head, a clear one. It said, Wake up, Alexis.
Her eyes snapped open, she leaped up, bristling.
It was Marmalade. She sat on her haunches on a large rock, gold and cream fur illuminated by the red and glowing sunset.
“You’re still here.†Remembering what the other Pukis had said of Pukis communications being no longer private, Alexis did that one thing Pukises never did. She spoke aloud.
To any human, it would have been only a hissing and crackling mew, but to a Pukis, it was as distinct as a thought.
“What next?†she whispered, her voice unused to the action.
Marmalade snapped her head back from where she was grooming her paw and stared at Alexis. “You spoke?†she said, narrowing her eyes suspiciously.
“If it’s the only safe way to communicate, why not? This will keep humans who would harm us from finding out our plans.â€
“But Alexis,†Marmalade said, her voice thick with worry. “Humans aren’t the least of our problems. I am more worried about those other Pukis who would do thing to avoid being captured and made into a coat.â€
“Wonderful. Absolutely wonderful.â€
Alexis peered nervously around the clearing. Things really had to be bad if Pukis were beginning to turn each other in to save their own skins, literally.
“So, what is our plan?†Alexis gurgled.
Marmalade jumped down from her perch and leaned close into Alexis, whispering…
“The fire conjurer and his friends are headed toward the empire ship called the Blood Storm, where the great orb is being held, on a pirate ship. The Blood Storm is the 200-gun flagship of the Sanguiz Empire. Because of the ship’s high security, it is the perfect place for the Orb or Centaur. I do not know what Ren and others plan to do with the Orb, but what I do know is that they have promised the pirates treasure and when those brutes find that there is none, there will be trouble.â€
Alexis stiffened. “What does Ren plan to do with the Orb?â€
Marmalade hesitated. †I don’t think he’s sure what to do himself. Either way, with each passing moment, he gets closer and closer to Mordran and deeper into trouble.â€
Alexis leaped up from her spot. “Ren’s plan can not fail! It’s importance is too great! Come, we must leave immediately!â€
Leave immediately? said an unfamiliar voice in the heads of Marmalade and Alexis. I think not.
They whirled around, fur bristling. A red-gold Pukis hovered above them, dragon-formed, his beautiful, delicate face inscrutable. We don’t have much of a choice, he said. The trade is growing. We betray our kin, or we die.
I would rather die! mind-shrieked Marmalade.
Would you?
Yes!
You are a pet, he said scornfully.
Marmalade leaped, switching forms mid-flight, beating her glittering wings angrily, golden claws extended. The red Pukis dodged.
Marmalade! called Alexis. Stop! Think it through! Ren!
Marmalade did not heed her. Alexis flew at her, knocking her out of the air as she lunged again at the stranger. Leave him be! the blue Pukis scolded. Then, to the male, Please, don’t betray us. We’ve got to go. We’ve got to.
Don’t we all! But we can’t, can we?
Please! No one has to know!
They would know. His eyes were no longer on Alexis or the simmering Marmalade beside her, but on someone behind them. The two Pukises turned as one, to see a grizzled man in a leather tunic tensed, net in hand, ready to seize them. Marmalade gave a furious hiss, and flew at his head, a miniature stream of flame directed at his helmeted scalp. A split second later, Alexis joined her. The red Pukis hovered, looking on as the two females attacked his master. The from nowhere, he joined them, diving at the man’s unprotected eyes.
The Pukis furrier was outnumbered. His helmet was growing uncomfortably warm, and no longer seemed as safe as it had been a moment ago. He fled into the woods, and Alexis coasted down onto a rock, followed by Marmalade and the red Pukis.
There are options, you see, she remarked to him, switching to cat-form and beginning to clean herself.
I suppose.
They said nothing for another hour or so, resting, washing. Marmalade caught a small rodent and roasted it, then gobbled it up in two bites. Alexis did the same. The red Pukis watched them.
We should go, said Alexis. I hope it is not already too late.
Too late for what?
We have a task.
A task.
Yes.
What does it entail?
If only we knew!
Well… A moment of hesitation. If ever you need me, send word.
Alexis cocked her head. It was possible to communicate over great distances, but it was an unreliable method of speaking, and rarely used. Who shall we send for?
It was a Pukis name, long and impossible for human letters and words to replicate. Alexis nodded. Marmalade stood and stretched.
Well? said the cream-colored Pukis. Shall we go?
They launched themselves into the air and began to fly.“You can do that?†the guard asked.
“Of course I can.†Jack assured. “Damned power’s why I’m hear ain’t it?â€
The guard nodded slowly, his eyes gleaming with a hint of greed. He turned his back to Jack and scouted out the area. Yes, the timing could not have been more perfect. The guards shift was not scheduled to end for several more hours and no other guard was in the premises.
“It’s a deal if you can prove it.†the guard said. Without any hesitation, the man bent over and unlocked Jacks cell. As Jack scrambled out the door, the guard handed him his iron staff.
“Here.†the guard said. “Turn my staff to gold. If you can do it, then you’ve got yourself a deal.â€
“Sounds good to me.†Jack said. With an experienced twirl, Jack took the staff and clunked it onto the guards head. The man fell like a stone.
“That was easier then I thought it’d be.†Jack commented. He bent down and took the guards keys out of his pocket. With a flourish, he unlocked Octivio’s door.
“Hmmmmm.†Jack contemplated. “It seems a shame to keep everyone else cooped up.†A mischievous twinkle came into his eyes. He glanced at Octivio with a crooked grin. “What do you say? Jailbreak?â€
A few short minutes later, a little group gathered around Octavio and Jack. There were only about ten of them, as the Blood Storm tended to transfer its prisoners off to other ships promptly, for fear of just such an attack as this (â€It’d serve ‘em better to hire some smarter guards,†said Jack with a wink.), but there were enough.
“What’s the plan?†asked one, a bony fellow with a crooked nose.
“It’s very simple,†said Octavio. “We go out, and we fight our wy to the lifeboats. Chances are we won’t make it, but it’s better than sitting here in the dark.â€
“Yessir!†said a prisoner.
Octavio turned to Jack. “What do we have by way of weapons?â€
“This staff, his pistol, his knife, and his sword. That’s all.†It was a dismal display. Octavio wished he had his own pistol here, but of course he did not. “Four weapons among…†a swift count of heads “…eleven people. That won’t do.â€
“We could bash ‘em with the lantern,†suggested Jack.
“Five weapons. That leaves six without.†Octavio was beginning to doubt the soundness of his plan. Not that it had ever been very sound in the first place.
“Who needs weapons!†someone cried, and it was echoed among the newly freed prisoners.
“We’ll get ‘em off the soldiers!†said another.
Octavio hesitated. He hated to leave any army he was in charge of without proper weapons, but what choice did he have? “Here,†he said, handing out the staff, pistol, knife and sword and giving the lantern to Jack.
Jack smiled. “So. Shall we go?â€
“Why not?†The ascended the ladder one by one, first Jack, holding the lantern, then Octavio, then the stream of ex-prisoners, out into the light.
No one was nearby, and consequently they had a head start of a few few seconds. But they were unaccustomed to the light, and that head start was lost blinking in the sun. And then the crew of the Blood Storm descended upon them.When that morning had dawned, red and fiery, there had still been no sign of Tam. And now, in the late afternoon, Ren lay asleep in his hammock, worn out from trying to make contact with the other boy. He didn’t know why he bothered. He should be glad that he no longer had to deal with Tam. But he no longer trusted the older boy. He was weak-minded and traitorous, afraid of both sides of this battle. Who knew what damage he would wreak? Ren closed his eyes. Never had he wanted the Sea Roc like this, with her steady, trustworthy captain, the cheerful and colorful alcooktor, and the sailors whose company he had grown to enjoy. To think, only a few months ago, he had lived a comfortable, safe life with his uncle. From there, he had been plunged into the strange world of pirates and disturbing powers, and as soon as he had begun to get used to that, everything had changed again. And again. And again. “Sphaere, what I wouldn’t give for a normal life again,†he groaned.
A shout from the deck. Ren leaped to his feet, and bolted out into the light. “What’s going on?†he asked Arn, as the latter headed toward where Niria and the Wavebreaker’s other stormmaster had gathered.
“They’ve sighted the Blood Storm!†said Arn.
In less than an hour, they were near enough to the Blood Storm that Ren could make out individual figures on the deck. He squinted. “They’re fighting,†he said.
“What?†Captain Sharpnose had come up behind him, carrying a telescope. Inwardly Ren cringed. He could never get used to the man, with his warlike appearance and smell of alchemical powder.
“There’s a fight, sir. On the deck.â€
“A fight?†Captain Sharpnose said, drawing in a quick breath. “Who?â€
“I dunno, why don’t you look yourself?†Ren said sharply. “You’re the one with the telescope.â€
With a grunt of surprise, Sharpnose drew out his telescope and peered over at the Bloodstorm. “Indeed.†he said slowly. He leaned over the deck rail intently, as if he were surveying the scene. With a sharp intake of breathe, Sharpnose suddenly stood back and roared the most blood-curdling battle cry Ren had ever heard in his life. Ren fell back, startled, as the deck immediately filled up with a mixed array of pirate crew members, all armed to the teeth.
“Broadside her mates!†Sharpnose declared.
The crew cheered and scrambled about the ship in a furious swarm. Sharpnose turned and helped Ren back to his feet. Chuckling, he said,â€Yah’d best get yer sea legs lad. Today we’ll be receivin gold and glory! Gold and glory lad!†still chuckling, the pirate captain lumbered away.
Ren chewed his lip nervously and looked over at the Bloodstorm, which was coming closer and closer every minute. Was it really going to be this easy? Wasn’t this supposed to the greatest battle ship ever since………..
*BOOM* The foundations of the deck under Ren’s feet shuddered, forcing Ren to his knees. Of course, nothing was ever easy.
Roars throughout the ship were evidense enough that the empire’s cannons had done their job. Responding shots resounded from the interior of the Wavebreaker.
“Ren!†came a cry from behind him. “What’s happening?!†Niria ran toward him and ducked down beside him.
“I’m not exactly sure.†Ren replied. “All I know is that we’re going to board he Bloodstorm but someone’s already on the deck, fighting.â€
Niria nodded, understandingly as Arn joined them. “So, are we going to destroy the Orb?†Arn asked. “That’s the plan, right?â€
Ren hesitated for a moment. “I’m not sure about that.†Ren said. “I think we need to use it; we need to release the Unknowables.â€
Arn raised is eyebrows. “Is this about Tam’s dream again? You can’t be serious! How could we possibly beleive anything from that traitor?!â€
Ren opened his mouth too protest but was shocked into silence when Niria said, “Ren’s right. Captain Pye thought the Orb was important enough to get a valuable copy of it at his own risk. There must have been something he wanted us to do with it.â€
Niria turned forcefully toward Ren. “Ren, †she said. “I know I haven’t always agreed with you on everything you’ve done, but I’m with you on this. To the very end.â€
Ren smiled gratefully at her and glanced at Arn, who was nodding uncertainly. “OK.†Arn said. “I’ll stick with you guys.â€
Another attack rocked the ship, sending waves onto the deck.
Arn leaped to his feet, “but we’re not going to get anywhere unless we reach the Bloodstorm!â€
Another cannon, this time closer, shook the Wavebreaker with tremendous force. Ren, Niria, and Arn leaped up to see the Bloodstorm dangerously close. A battle was certainly waging on the deck, if not a strange one. A small group of thin, desperate men were fighting against a whole army of empirial soldiers with an odd assortment of swords, muskets, and …….. was that a lanturn?
The 3 jumped back, startled, as several pirates ran up to the deck rail, screaming manically. Without any hesitation, the men started to board the Bloodstorm.
“Come on!†Arn yelled. “This is our chance!â€
Ren began to follow but was stopped by Niria. “Ren.†she said forcefully. “You must promise me. We will return for the bartender’s daughter when this is over.â€
Ren hesitated.
“Promise me!†Niria screeched, digging her nails into Ren’s arm.
“We will return, Niria.†Ren agreed reluctantly. “I promise.â€
Niria nodded. “Good. I’ll hold you to it.†With that, she followed Arn across the water to the deck of the Bloodstorm.
With a deep breathe, Ren followed suit.
The deck of the Blood Storm was chaotic even before a horde of well-armed pirates had swarmed over the side, and Ren found that he was losing his sense of direction. Niria stayed with him only long enough to wish him luck – rather loudly over the fray – and then she was gone, long hair flying, and Ren thought he heard her shout something that sounded like, “That’s for murdering the Captain!â€. Arn gave him a nod, a grin, and a wink, and then with a whoop, he plunged into the melèe.
Ren wanted to get out of this mess – and quick, before someone stabbed him. Gripping his knife, he stumbled towards the stern of the ship. The Blood Storm’s name was very fitting, he reflected, and then a sharp piece of metal snapped by his face. He felt blood trickle onto his cheek, but there was no pain. Yet. He ran.
And then he was through a door and the noise of the battle dimmed slightly. In front of him was a narrow, short corridor, ending in a door. On either side of the corridor was another door. He opened the one on his left, trying to think where the Orb would be kept. It revealed a spacious room with a four-poster bed and a definite feminine touch. He wrinkled his nose. What was this, the Captain’s wife’s room? He closed the door again and tried the one on his left. This looked more promising. He stepped forward into the Captain’s room.
Ren gasped in horror at the scene that greeted him.
Tam was kneeling on the floor, head bowed over a glowing sphere. His hands hovered a mere centimeter over the surface, and he was moaning slightly. Rake Vashkar stood over him, a long knife poised. A girl whom Ren had never seen stood by, hands folded, face impassive.
“Please,†whispered Tam, his voice hoarse. “Please, stop. I don’t know how it works.â€
“Kill them!†hissed Vashkar. “Kill the pirates.â€
“I don’t know how!†cried Tam.
“You will not remove your hands from the Orb until every last pirate has died,†said Vashkar coldly.
Tam whimpered. His hands shook. Ren could see the life ebbing from him. He stood there, just inside the door, silent, unnoticed, unsure. He felt half-inclined to leave Tam there, but other feelings got in the way. So many people had died because of him already…Tam need not join their number. And what if he succeeded in killing the pirates? That did it.
“Stop it,†he said loudly.
Vashkar turned. “Why look who it is! The other one! How perfect. Now when this one dies -†he prodded Tam with his toe “- you can replace him.â€
“No way,†said Ren, wishing desperately that he had any weapon but the tiny knife.
“I think you’ll find you’ll change your mind.â€
Ren’s mind whirled. He had to buy time. There was an alchemical pistol on the Captain’s desk, but how did he get there? “When we both die, there won’t be anyone left,†he said, beginning to edge towards the desk.
“One of you will succeed.†Vashkar lunged for the pistol himself. Ren jumped back as the room filled with the acrid scent of alchemical powder. The shot had hit the floor where Ren’s foot had been only a moment before. Of course. Vashkar wouldn’t kill him. Not this way.
If anything, that scared him more.
He looked across the room. The girl was pulling Tam away from the Orb. “Keep going,†she mouthed silently. “Distract him.â€Run! Run! They were around him! All around him! They reached for him, howled in his ears, lashed out at him.
“He’s here!â€
“He’s come!â€
“Free us!â€
“Free us!â€
The cries, persistent, scr
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Alice
in July 12th, 2008 @ 13:10The cries, persistent, screeched relentlessly in Tam’s ears. He had to escape! He had to run!
But wait…….his eyes clouded over and he saw a blade dangerously close to his neck. “Please, I…..†Tam protested, his vision blurred again and………
“Free us boy!â€
“Free us!â€
Sweat rolled off Tam’s cheeks as he screamed in anguish. At least, he thought he had screamed. It sounded different here, almost as if the air was made of a thicker substance and would not allow sound waves to travel correctly.
Suddenly, a new voice penetrated the terror. “You fools!†it said. “The boy is missing key. He can do nothing. Nothing!â€
A roar of anguish defined is ears and Tam collapsed, rolling into a pathetic heap.
“Why is he here?!†the voices bellowed. “Who has sent him?! Surely not…….â€
“No.â€screeched one. “There is no other presense with him.†Tam shuddered. He felt strange. Unattached to anything he had ever known. He raised his head weakly and a whimper escaped his lips. Strange. The world seemed quiet now. He strained his ears and heard hushed tones in the distance.
“He’s almost gone.†“Why is he here?†“Perhaps he displeased the master?†“No, the master could not finalize his plan without this boy, though he may be a fool.†“We will never be free without him either.†“What can we do?†“Nothing.â€
A growl interrupted the speech. “I have always known. I have felt it, though faint. There is another……â€
Tam shuddered. The voices were gone. What……..
He felt hands grabbing him forcefully and had a sensation of being dragged across the floor.He opened his eyes and saw an intense pair of brown eyes glaring down at him. With a moan, Tam blacked out.Niria caught sight a familiar figure through the battle, and her eyes misted up, as she remembered her Captain. She yelled something at the soldier she was battling, although she didn’t know what it was. And then that familiar figure was by her side. “Niria!†he said. “What on earth are you doing here?â€
Niria’s sword almost fell from her grasp. “Captain?†she asked faintly.
“The very same. Tell me, how is Ren?â€
“I don’t know, sir. He’s getting the Orb now. I can only hope…â€
The Captain nodded.
“What are you doing here, sir? We thought you had died.â€
“I might have, if it hadn’t been for the exceptionally good people I found in my prison. I wonder how they are now.â€
More and more people fell. Arn appeared, speckled in blood but seemingly intact. He did not appear to notice Niria or Octavio.
“So…†said Pye. “How many survived?â€
“I don’t know, sir. The ship was gone when we returned to the harbor.â€
“The ship! The Sea Roc!â€
“She is gone, sir.â€
Captain Pye’s face twisted into an undefinable expression. “Only to be expected,†he muttered.
“I’m sorry,†said Niria. The battle raged about them, but very few noticed the two standing there. “Too much has been lost for those boys.â€
“The boys are not the root of it,†said Captain Pye, and then he disappeared into the fray.Ren barely had time to react before Vashkar was on him. The huge man landed like a boulder on Ren’s side. Ren only had a split second to roll out of the way, lest he was crushed by the huge man’s body. Without missing a beat, Vashkar leaped back up to his feet. Ren had hardly gotten back on his feet when Vashkar was onto him again. The man was relentless!
Ren had to think fast! Quickly, Ren screamed the first words that came into his head. “Flamula Infenso Pilus!â€
The words had an instant effect. Vashkar reared back, screaming, his purple haiir ablaze. Ren took this opportunity to glance around. Good, Tam and the girl were gone. Ren turned back to Vashkar and forcefully rammed his body into Vashkar’s flaming figure, forcing the man to the ground.
“That’s for Captain Pye!†Ren screamed.
Ren turned away from Vashkar, who was sprawled, helpless, upon the ground. Suddenly, Ren let out a yell. The Orb! Where was it?! That girl must have taken it!
Ren turned to run out after her when he landed face to face with Vashkar.
“Going somewhere?†the man asked with an evil grin and held up the alchemical pistal. Ren barely had any time to react before he hit with the greatest force he had ever known. Vashkar laughed manically as Ren fell to the ground.
“I don’t care how useful you are. No one messes with my hair.†he chuckled.
Out of the corner of his fading vision, Ren was calmed by the appearance of a tiny pair of familiar, fluttering wings.
Just before he went black, Ren heard a tiny voice in his head.
I’m here, Ren, it said. Don’t worry. I’m here.When the battle was over, Niria began to worry about Ren. “Arn,†she asked, “have you seen Ren?†The boy was tying a long gash on his leg with a strip of his shirt. He shook his head.
Niria bit her lip and wandered off. Where was he? She turned in slow, worried circles among the havoc. And then something caught her eye. A gold-and-cream-colored Pukis, flying sedately over the chaotic deck.
“Marmalade!†she gasped.
Marmalade, satisfied in having caught the young woman’s attentions, turned and flew in the direction of the quarterdeck. Niria followed hastily. “Where did you come from?†she asked the Pukis, but of course got no reply.
She was led into a fine room, ostentatiously decorated , but a terrible mess. There was blood on the rug, the curtains were askew… No-doubt-highly-important papers from the captain’s desk lay scattered on the floor, and more than one item or piece of decoration was severely singed or smoldering. The whole room smelled of alchemical powder and burnt hair. But that was not the worst.
On the floor lay two unconscious figures: Rake Vashkar, covered in burns and scratch marks, his violet hair in disarray, and Ren, still and bloody.
“Ren!†gasped Niria. “Sphaere, no! REN!â€Ren struggled in his sleep. He knew that he needed to wake up, There was something he needed to do. Something important. But, somehow, he couldn’t seem to open his eyes; he couldn’t seem to lift his head out of the fog. Slowly, yet surely, he felt himself being lifted up, and up, and up out of his slumber. In the distance, a whisper echoed in his head. “He’s here. I’ve found him.â€
Ren began to stir restlessly, his hands brushing against his numerous bandages. Beside him, Alexis let out a purr of contentment. About time. Wake up sleepy head, she coaxed.
With a slight groan, Ren opened his eyes and sat up slightly. Immediately, his eyes filled with a mixture of shock and joy and he gasped. Before him, sat a much weathered, yet familiar face with a hat perched upon his crown.
“Captain Pye!†Ren exclaimed joyously.
“The very same,†said Pye.
“But I thought you were dead!â€
“Not quite, although I would have been had Sharpnose and the Wavebreaker not come along in when they did.â€
“I lost the Orb, sir. Tam was there, and Vashkar was trying to make him use it, and there was a girl… And I distracted Vashkar, and the girl ran off with the Orb. And Tam.â€
Octavio sighed heavily and put his head in his hands. “Princess Tera,†he said.
“Isn’t that the Emperor’s daughter? One of ‘em, I mean. The fifth one?â€
“Fourth. But yes. And now she has the Orb. And Tam to work it.â€
Ren gasped and tried to sit up. “Ow!â€
“You were shot, remember. It’s your luck you have no alchemical power, or you’d be dead. Those pistols are quite flawed. They really weren’t figuring in stormmasters at all.â€
“Who won the battle?â€
“Us. The Blood Storm’s ours now.â€
“But not the Orb.â€
“No, not the Orb.â€
“How long was I knocked out?â€
“About four hours after we found you. Goodness knows how long you’d been unconscious before then.â€
“Alexis and Marmalade – how are they?â€
“They’re fine. Not getting along terribly well, but that’s only to be expected. They never have. They nearly did Rake Vashkar in. Unfortunately he’s a stormmaster so they couldn’t finish the job.â€
Niria appeared again, looking distraught. “She’s not anywhere!†she cried. “I’ve looked and looked – she might have fallen overboard – or been killed in battle – or Sphaere knows what else! I promised I’d keep her safe!â€
“Who?†asked Ren.
“The bartender’s daughter, the little girl – she’s GONE!â€Tera sat in the bows of the lifeboat, holding a cloth-wrapped object tightly to her chest. Next to her sat Tam, coatless and shivering, head bowed over his knees. His hand throbbed painfully, matching his headache. He looked away from the imperious girl and her burden with a shudder, out at the tossing waves, at the tired sailors who pulled almost desperately at the oars.
“Where are we going?†he asked hoarsely. His throat stung, but there was no clear water to soothe it.
“Hermetopolis,†said Tera shortly. “To my father. Where else?â€
“Why?†Tam said.
“Because I said so,†Tera said, turning to him, but her heart didn’t seem quite in it. “Because I, the Fourth Daughter of the Emperor, said so. So there.â€
Tam looked away from her, but Tera got a slight glimpse of his eyes, dark with pain, and worry. Vashkar had taken not only Tam’s strength, and nearly his life, but much of his fighting spirit as well.
She sighed, and lifted the heavy oars, not designed for someone her size, out of the water, dipping them back in with barely a sound. The waves crashed in perfect time; the beat of the ocean. One, two. One, two. One, two.
The waves made steady rhythm, one that always stayed the same, or at least changed so slightly that you could barely notice it at all. But now, like a hurricane stirring from the warm waters of the west, the pattern of the waves were changing in big ways. And at the center it were Tam, the injured boy who sat in her lifeboat, giving up, and Ren, the boy who Tera had hardly seen but for a glimpse or two when he helped her and Tam escape.
“To Hermetopolis we go,†Tera repeated under her breath, just a bit louder than a puff of wind. “The seas are changing, and who knows what will happen next? One thing’s for sure, though. I plan to be right in the thick of it.â€
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 12th, 2008 @ 13:2824) But what if taking over all of Sphere included destroying the Unknowables? I don’t know. I guess that was what I was thinking.
22) Wow. I hadn’t even thought of that! but who will they battle? And where in the world will we insert this stuff?
250 Oh! Wow! Thanks for posting this!
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Alice
in July 12th, 2008 @ 13:3629-
1. Eh, that’s not that important. I think the hardest part of removing the Unknowables would be thinking a new Mysterious Past for Tam Eizid.
2. Oh, they could battle anyone really. Just merchant ships, maybe a little navy ship, I don’t know. Where to insert it is a better question, but we can find somewhere.
3. De nada.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 12th, 2008 @ 20:59Wow. This is the most activity this thread has seen in a long time……..
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 16th, 2008 @ 16:44OK!
1a. It took him a few minutes to remember where he was and what had happened, and he would have gladly slipped back into unconsciousness and forgotten all about it again.
1b. Hmmmmmm. This sentence caught my eye right away! It just doesn’t flow! Suggestions?2a. “I need…†an odd pause “…a powder monkey,†said Captain Pye. “You need safety. Is it a deal?â€
2b. What is the odd pause for?
Is Captain Pye hiding something? He does need a powder monkey doesn’t he?3. OK. I was wondering…… why would Captain Pye tell Ren “everything”? I mean, from the way he is talking, this isn’t common knowledge. And why would he tell Ren about his powers? Plus, why would he invite Ren into his cabin?! I don’t know all that much about ships, but random crew members aren’t just invited into the captain’s cabin! It just isn’t done!
4. Another thing, this scheme of the pirates, it sounds fishy to me. I mean, I know they mean well and all, but, really, how do we know that they just won’t decide to keep the empire under their own rule? Plus, if they just “hand it over to the people” there will be enormous complications! Havoc would follow! They have to have some idea of a government or the plan won’t work!
Oh! Oops! Will do more later! Dinner time!
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Alice
in July 16th, 2008 @ 20:1132- Like I said, let’s worry about trivial stuff like sentence flow later, so let’s ignore point number 1.
2: Well, no, he doesn’t. There isn’t a single scene in which Ren is treated like a powder monkey. He doesn’t interact with the crew besides Tam and Arn, only the officers/various other important people. He never has any sort of training, and he never acts as a powder monkey. I would like to change all this, myself, but it’ll take work.
OH. And besides, we would have to change the whole “oh-Ren-guess-what-you’re-magic-we’ve-been-looking-for-you” thing.
3: Um. I don’t have the answers to most of these, but I have to admit you have been guilty of the cabin thing a lot too (as have I). See, I’m going to assume that almost no one has their own cabin. The captain does, of course, and a few officers, but they’re small and cramped. The rest of the crew sleeps elsewhere, but besides the foc’s’le, I’m not sure where. And then there’s a larger cabin for the officers’ meals and stuff. But Ren and Tam would never, EVER be in a cabin or whatever.
4: Eh, whatever. It’s idealistic, but not completely ridiculous.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 17th, 2008 @ 07:2033) Hmmmmm. I see what you mean. None of them would have their own cabins, except for Niria. Niria would have one because she is the only female on board and they were not permitted to sleep where the men did. Not that they would want to……..
But that shouldn’t be too hard to change. Right?
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 10:5034- I think… the captain and three officers would have their own cabin, and the stormmasters and alchemist would sleep with the crew. Niria would need her own cabin, though.
Ren, Tam, and Arn would sleep with the rest of the crew, in hammocks. Naturally this would be horrible for Tam, since everyone hates him (including me, despite the fact that I invented him).
And there’s another thing. We should put more interaction between Tam-Ren-Arn and the crew, and less between Tam-Ren-Arn and the officers.Oh, and another thing, to make it smoother. No ship has only one powder monkey; that’s ridiculous. But if we made Tam and Arn powder monkeys as well, we can do away with the whole “cabin boy” cliche, and also give all three boys a thing in common. Maybe we can have some scenes where they talk over dinner or something.
Oh, wait, I forgot something. The boys (particularly Ren) do absolutely NO work at all, and that will never do.I’m going to go get POSOC now. I think he’ll enjoy what we’re doing.
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 11:00Well I emailed him…AGAIN. We’ll see if it has any result.
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 11:11Here’s a bulleted list of things that I think we should do. Tell me which ones you agree with:
•Change the whole “We’ve-been-looking-for-you-Ren” thing
•Change the entire cabin situation
•Make Tam and Arn powder monkeys
•Add a few sea-battles
•Add more interaction with the crew
•Take out some of the interaction with the officers
•Make the boys work a little more/Add a scene or two of normal on-board life
•Replace that HORRIBLE, AWKWARD SCENE -dies-
*Fix the confusion about how a ship is laid out etc. You can’t just climb up the side of a ship. But you can climb up the ladder affixed to the side of the ship.And that’s just to start with.
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POSOC with 5 BP and 60 IWP: 23 wung points, embedded (bara brith, chorley cake)
in July 17th, 2008 @ 13:57Hi. I’m here. What do you want me to do?
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 14:1038- We need to rewrite. You got the email, but other people didn’t. So I’ll go and copy it.
How it is: Magic is everywhere. New characters get introduced every few pages. Blood and guts and evil cackling around every corner. Mordran and Vashkar are nearly indistinguishable from each other. Confusion reigns. All attempts to tie everything up nicely in a little bow with lots of interconnected characters only resulted in tangles and knots. The Unknowables hide in the darkness making it hard to concentrate. The characters have changed so drastically since the beginning that they are hardly recognizable. None of know anything about how ships are laid out and therefore we do everything wrong. Lowly powder monkeys rub shoulders with the officers while actual sailors don’t seem to exist. In short, it’s a mess.
How I want it to be (I can’t speak for Kiwi or Meow, though): Interesting characters. Correct ship terminology etc. More distinction between sailors and officers. Subtler, more magical magic. Something must be done about those Unknowables. If a character such as Letor (wave spirit) shows up more than once, there must be a story. If he seems to be important, it must be made clear that he’s more than just a wave spirit. I want it to be more like the original vision of it. I want Ren to actually be a powder monkey, for a while at least. He could have interesting reactions around cannon fire. I want there to be more conflict between the Navy and the pirates before we go off into trying to capture The Blood Storm. I want the story to be a little slower, not like bang-bang-bang three chapters’ worth of stuff just happened in five pages! Maybe we can linger on characters for a little longer before jumping to the next one.Not everyone will agree with this, and I don’t want to, like, take over or anything. But if other people post their visions we can sort of combine them.
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Cat's Meow
in July 17th, 2008 @ 14:1439 – Sounds good to me. I’ll at least try to stick around and do some writing.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 17th, 2008 @ 14:5737) I agree with everything you have said except……
1. What types of interaction with the officers? I mean, some of them are important to the story….. But I do understand that no powdermonkey would be talking so much to the officers. Perhaps we could twist the story a little so some of the conversations were the same, but were done with different people.
2. Which scene? There are several I could think of……39) Yes! Definately! I also don’t think that people shouldn’t all know about Ren right away. I mean, they didn’t know about Tam at first, why should they know about Ren? Perhaps we could use instances with cannon fire for Ren to realize that he can manipulate fire.
Maybe we can do a lot of this stuff in between when Ren was taken on board and when Tam was thrown overboard. We could allow text for clarification, bonding, and battles!
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 15:1241-
1. Yeah.
2. You mean the HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE AWKWARD scene? That one’s pretty long, but it really starts when Pye and Ren have that first conversation and it ends when Pye is done talking to Tam. I HATE THAT SCENE. -dies-re 39: Yup yup yup.
I’m going to post the story in a minute. Some of it, rather.
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 15:16OK, bits in italics are things I think rewriting and the notes in bold are why I think so. Other people should do this too (their own opinion, the same writing) so we know what to rewrite and how.
THE SEA ROC
By PseudonymThe Inner Sea had formed hundreds of years before, when the lowland flats in the
center of Sphaere had been deluged constantly as the Age of Ice ended and the great glaciers melted. Now, the only land surface of Sphaere is the mountains around its shores.
The Sanguiz Empire soon took advantage of the confusion caused by the Deluge to expand its territory from the handful of states it once commanded. As our story opens, all of Sphaere is under its iron grip.
That is, almost all.
Hardy bands of seafarers, disgusted with the decadence and corruption that infects Sphaere, have taken to the Inner Sea and the scattering of lawless isles in its center. They raid the prosperous, Empire-sanctioned merchant ships that cross the Sea and bamboozle the incompetent navy.
One ship in particular is notable among these: The Sea Roc.
[No changes necessary. In fact, this prologue being what sets the scene, this is how I envisioned it originally. Let’s have them bamboozle the Navy at some point, ‘K?]Ren Splayr dashed down the narrow alley, the loose soles of his sandals flapping on its damp bricks. The whistles of the soldiers weren’t far behind. Ren hoped he could get to the seafront before they caught him and he went the same way as his uncle. Perlan Ethor, Ren’s only remaining family, had taken him in when his mother died and his father disappeared. Now Perlan was gone too, shot by the captain of the guard for writing an article about corruption in the Sanguiz Empire. Funny how a few strokes of ink in the Hermetopolis Gazette could translate into a puff of alchemical smoke, a flying musket ball, and death. Ren was wanted too, simply for knowing Perlan and “possible aiding and abetting propaganda against our glorious Emperor Sanguinus IX.”
Ren’s only hope was to stow away aboard a merchant ship bound for the opposite side of Sphaere, all the way across the Inner Sea.
“Where are you running to, boy?” said a gruff voice, and Ren looked up into the eyes of a man. Probably a sailor of high rank, to judge by his clothes. Maybe even a captain. He wore a very large and ridiculous three-cornered hat. In spite of his present state, Ren wanted to laugh, but there was no time. He dodged the man, and sped off down the alley again.
[This piece continues what the prologue began. I really like it.]
Octavio Pye watched the boy go. That was him, sure enough. Ren Splayr. Why was he in such a hurry?
[Originally this was different, and I would very much like to change it back, but we’d have to do a lot of editing further on. However, once we revert it to its original form (“Octavio Pye watched the boy go. He automatically sized him up. Limber, agile, small for his age of maybe fourteen… he would be a good powder monkey. Why was he in such a hurry?”) then we’ll be continuing the tone set by what has already been written.]
A bunch of officious-looking people in the uniforms of Imperial soldiers rushed down the alley after the boy. Octavio was experienced at looking as though he had no idea what was going on. The guards didn’t question him.
So the boy is in trouble with the Sanguiz Empire, Octavio mused. I think he won’t refuse a job aboard the Sea Roc.
He turned and took one of the many shortcuts he knew to the harbor.Ren ran on, his heart pounding in his chest, his breath coming ragged. He reached the harbor, and looked wildly from side to side for a place to hide. The soldiers were gaining, and there was nowhere to go.
Nowhere except the stinking black water of the harbor.
One of the soldiers, a lean, athletic one, pulled ahead, raising his musket to his shoulder. Ren leaped into the sea, hearing the bullet whiz over his head.
With a loud sploosh, the water closed over him. He fought to get to the surface, flailing wildly. When he reached it, though, he almost wished he hadn’t. Three soldiers were pointing guns at him, and looked like they intended to use them.
There were three loud cracks, and Ren cringed, expecting to feel the bullets smashing into his chest. But they didn’t. He looked up to see the soldiers clutching their injured hands, their unfired muskets on the ground beside them.
What happened? thought Ren. The soldiers were pushed out of the way as a man with a long beard and a green robe pulled him out of the water with a grip as strong as a lion’s. The man, judging by his appearance was an alchemist, maybe a doctor. “Come on! We must hurry! These soldiers will recover and call for reinforcements very soon.” Ren had no choice but to follow the alchemist through the crowds of people, hoping that wherever he was going, it was somewhere safe.
The alchemist stopped in front of a small three-masted ship moored at an out-of-the-way corner of the dock.
“Vushtek!” came a cry from on board. “You found him!”
“Yes, and I’m being pursued. Let me up, quick!”
A head poked over the rail. It was the man from the alley. “If they catch up to you, they’ll be sorry they messed with the crew of Octavio Pye. Tzil? Niria? I need a wind.”
Ren dimly noticed a man in blue and white clothing raising a hand, and a strong breeze blowing across the waterfront. A weatherweaver, he thought, but he wasn’t surprised. His head was reeling from hearing the name of Octavio Pye. Octavio Pye! The dreaded Captain Krakeneater of the pirate ship Sea Roc!!!
[Very good, &c., &c. This did not please me when it was first written, but now I like it.]
When Ren came fully to his senses, he was lying on a berth in a ship that rolled alarmingly beneath him. It took him a few minutes to remember where he was and what had happened, and he would have gladly slipped back into unconsciousness and forgotten all about it again. He groaned, and almost wished that the soldiers had caught him. What they would do to him couldn’t be much worse than what was going to happen to him now, he thought. But then again, he was still alive, and he wouldn’t be if the pirates hadn’t saved him.
The door opened and a boy came in. He was perhaps two years older than Ren and carrying a pile of clothes. “You’re awake,” he said with obvious surprise.
“Yes.” And I wish I wasn’t, he added silently.
“I brought you some dry clothes,” said the older boy. “And when you’re dressed, Captain Pye would like a word with you.” And he left.
[I wrote this myself, so I am free to criticize it as much as I liked. First, after reading the entire thing many times, I realized that Ren was still fully conscious at the end of the last scene, if very surprised. Second, it was a lame attempt to introduce Tam and I think I could do better. Third, berths? Doors? There we go with the nautical inaccuracies again.]Ren slowly dressed in the brown cotton shirt and maroon breeches the boy had brought him. Slipping his feet into his damp sandals, he stumbled out of the cabin and onto the main deck of the ship. All around him, men were working, in the rigging and on the deck. Over in a corner, the boy who had brought him the clothes silently scrubbed the wooden deck, every once in a while being kicked by a man in a long cerulean robe and striped pantaloon. Ren walked over to the side of the ship and looked out into the cool, clear waters. The splash of the waves that hit the ship and the caw of the seagulls all seemed to mock him. I wish I were back home in Hermetopolis, thought Ren.
“Ah, there you are,” said a voice.
Ren spun around and found himself face to face with Octavio Pye. “I want to get off,” he said flatly.
“I think we had better talk about this in my cabin,” said the captain, and steered Ren down below.
“I want to get off,” Ren repeated when they were in the captain’s cabin. “I want to go home.”
“You have no home, if I am correct in my guessing. In Hermetopolis, you were on the run from the law. You were about to be killed.”
Ren could not deny this, though he wanted to.
“I need…” an odd pause “…a powder monkey,” said Captain Pye. “You need safety. Is it a deal?”
Ren closed his eyes, and nearly shook his head, when the full truth came home to him. He paused, reliving the moment of his uncle’s death. He opened his eyes.
“It’s a deal.”
“Good, then. Report to me tomorrow morning at three bells. I will give you your duties then. For today, explore the ship! Learn everything you can today, because we really cannot afford failure.”
Ren gulped. Will they punish me? What kind of punishments? he thought. He’d heard of pirates and how they hurt and killed their prisoners. They’d walk the planks, get flogged, or even be shot! Ren was not sure if he was considered a prisoner, but after seeing the way that cabin boy was treated on the deck, he had decided that the pirates were harsher even than the stories implied.
“Aye aye, sir…er, captain,” Ren quickly said. He spun around, and ran back out to the main deck, trying to get as far away from Captain Pye as possible.
“Ren!” said Captain Pye.
Ren stopped, terrified, and turned around. “Yes, sir?”
“Are you frightened of me?”
“Yes, sir,” said Ren woodenly.
“You needn’t be.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Stop!” said Octavio Pye. “You’ve nothing to fear. I’m not going to hurt you.”
“Yes, sir.”
The captain put his head in his hands and sighed. Then he took off his hat, and Ren saw that he was completely bald, though he couldn’t have been more than a few years over fifty. “Why are you frightened of me? Sure, we’re pirates. But we don’t hurt people if there’s no reason.”
“You’re a pirate, sir. You just said you couldn’t afford failure, and I saw the cabin boy being beaten just now-”
“What!”
“He was being beaten, sir, while he scrubbed the deck.”
“Not Arn?”
“I don’t know who he was.”
“Fair hair?”
Ren nodded.
“They won’t stop picking on him, will they?” muttered Pye. He replaced his hat and rushed onto the deck. Ren sat with wobbly knees and a stomach turned to jelly, and recovered from his fear.
Captain Pye walked over to where Tam Eizid was sitting, curled miserably into a fetal position. The other man was no longer there.
“Tam,†he said sternly.
“Yes?†asked Tam, raising his head.
“You’ve got to stop.â€
“I wasn’t doing anything, sir.â€
“You’re letting them walk all over you. You put on airs, and they hate you for it. You’re a cabin boy now, and you have been for years. You can’t act better than them, or they’ll do this to you. And if you must continue with your pretentious habits, at least learn to defend yourself.â€
Tam nodded miserably.
“You go and attend to your own duties. And find Arn while you’re at it. He’s probably asleep in the sun somewhere.â€
[HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE AWKWARD scene. I hate it hate it hate it. I could tell the entire long, confusing story behind it, but I don’t want to. Please, let’s delete it and write a completely different and better one.]
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 15:40More!
Ren wandered about waiting for something to happen so he could stop waiting for nothing. As he walked, a small figure (if you could call it that) rushed across the deck. It resembled a small, winged dragon with ivory scales and golden pinions. It made a noise similar to a caterwaul, then transformed into a skinny, cream-furred kitten that dashed around the corner of a cabin and out of sight.
A Pukis! thought Ren. One of the fiercely protective dragon-cats from the Free Island of Lithuslov!
But what was a Pukis doing here aboard the Sea Roc? He’d thought they only lived on the Free Isles. He’d never heard of one on a ship before. He followed the Pukis around the corner, and then down a hatch, but it was gone. Ren looked around and then saw a flash of ivory scales and followed the Pukis through a small trapdoor halfway covered by a barrel of apples. Without thinking, Ren hopped down through the hole in the floor and found Captain Pye leaning over a desk. The Pukis flew up onto the pirate’s shoulder and perched itself there, before transforming back into a kitten.
[Little conflicts here. I can deal with a secret passage on a ship, but the Pukises are often on ships, and Ren should probably be doing something at this point. I doubt there’s much room for wandering around on board a ship. Nothing we can’t fix, though.]
“Well, hi there, Marmalade! How’s it going? Is everyone behaving?†the captain asked the Pukis.
Marmalade purred and pointed towards Ren.
The captain turned around in his chair to see what Marmalade was gesturing towards. When he saw Ren, his face grew red with anger, and then it turned back to its normal pigment, as he calmed down and grew an almost embarrassed, expression.
“Well, you’ve found my treasure hut. I guess you’ll be questioning me from now on unless I tell you. So sit down, and I will tell you all,†said Captain Pye, gesturing towards a small stool in the corner.
Ren did not understand a single thing that was going on, so, seeing as he had no other choice, he sat uncomfortably on the wooden stool. The wood was poorly cut, and had severe water damage. When he shifted his position on the stool, a faint creaking sound emerged from the legs. There were four of them, and they were quite thin and taking on a green tinge. Ren sat on his hands, as he usually did when he was uncomfortable, but vetoed that idea soon after he tried it, as the wood was so rough. Little splinters of wood stuck to his hands, and he tried to inconspicuously pick the slivers out of his skin. Captain Pye looked at him strangely, so he put his hands in his lap and focused all of his attention on the Captain.
“I will tell you all about our plan,†the captain went on. “We’ve been collecting treasure of all kinds from merchant ships, naval ships, and even those two-timing privateers. Eventually, we hope to get enough so that we can set ourselves up in society as respectable people. Then-†he grinned sardonically- “we can stop bringing society down from the outside, and start bringing society down from the inside. Sanguiz IX won’t last forever, and he has twelve children. The eldest ones are triplets. While they’re fighting over the throne, we can probably carve out a good-sized chunk of Sphaere for ourselves, where people can live without being bled dry by taxes or getting shot for speaking the truth. Money always helps- bribing public officials can get you anywhere if the price is high enough. And then, when we’ve got a proper country-colony-whatchacallit, with its own army and Alchemist Corps, we’ll take over Sphaere, and hand it over to the people.â€
“So you’re like good pirates, then, right?†Ren asked timidly.
“Well, sort of. We have a good cause, I suppose, but I have no illusions. We have killed people and we have robbed ships, and we will continue to do so until we have finished what we started out to do. Come into my cabin, I have something to show you.â€
[I feel that this is a very important scene, and also a very awkward one. Firstly, it’s good to establish that goal, but on the other hand, this also establishes a sort of a friendship between Ren and Octavio that shouldn’t be there. And then there’s the problem Kiwi mentioned, of Ren being invited into the cabin.]
In the cabin, Captain Pye started looking in his numerous dressers and drawers, and under papers around his desk. Finally, he found what he was looking for and exclaimed, â€Here we are!â€
He pulled out a golden sphere, with all of the known lands in Sphaere on it. From inside, Ren noticed, came a faint red glow. The golden globe made Ren shiver. It seemed as if a whole power came from inside the sphere, and it beckoned faintly for Ren to use the power.
“Inside this globe, know as the Orb of Centaur, is a power stronger than every military member of the Sanguiz Empire Army, combined,†said the captain. “There are only two people who can control it. And now, I have both of them on my ship.â€
“Who?†asked Ren.
“Well, one of them is Tam Eizid. The cabin boy you saw being beaten. The other one…†he paused. “Well, the other one is you.â€
Ren was too stunned to answer. Captain Pye continued. “There are four essential elements in Sphaere, and talented people can work with any of them. Alchemists work with earth. They are very common; in fact people who do not have alchemical talent are rare. Stormmaster is a generic term for weatherweavers, who work air, and waveworkers, who work water. The fourth class is so rare that it doesn’t even have a name. They work with fire. You and Tam are of that kind.â€
He picked up the orb again. “This, of course, isn’t the real orb, just a replica made alchemically from our best knowledge of its appearance. The real orb is in a steel strongbox in a locked compartment aboard the 200-gun flagship of the Sanguiz Navy, the Blood Storm.â€
“Oh,†said Ren, wondering what that odd mix of disappointment and elation and shock was called, if it even had a name. “Does the other boy know? Tam?â€
“He hasn’t the faintest idea. And I don’t intend to tell him yet, either.†The Captain walked out of the cabin, and Ren followed, hearing the wood groan beneath his feet. Ren walked over to the edge of the boat and looked down at the water splashing against the side of the boat.
[See, this is a good scene, and it explains the four elemental talents, but if they don’t know Ren’s talent yet, then it doesn’t make any sense. But even so, I don’t think that the scene itself needs much changing. The insertion of some on-board life and quite a bit of time sometime before the treasure-room scene will easily fix this particular problem.]
Captain Pye was pacing near the door of his cabin. Ren looked closely at his hat – Octavio Pye was famous for his large tricorn hat. Ren looked back out on the water, and saw that it was turning a darker color. Little ripples began appearing on the surface of the navy water, and Ren knew a storm was coming. He walked over to the Captain to tell him about the weather, but it seemed that Pye already knew. His head was tilted slightly upward, and his nose was working over-time trying to figure out where the storm was coming from, and where it was headed. Captain Pye’s strongest sense was his nose, at least when it came to detecting storms.
Captain Pye stared at Ren. He tugged on the brim of his hat. He sniffed again. And then he said those terrible words, “It’s coming from the South.â€
“Tzil! Niria! I need you on deck!†bellowed the Captain. “We have to quell the storm!â€
A man in blue and white clothing rushed up to them, followed by a young woman of about twenty years. “We’ll do our best, Captain,†said the woman, “but there’s something wrong about these waves…â€
Tzil licked his finger and raised it up. Small strands of lightning seemed to crackle across the tip. “Niria’s right,†he said urgently. “This is a made storm.â€
“Can you quell it?†the captain asked.
“Well… together, Niria and I are a match for any lone stormmaster on the Inner Sea, but this one must have been sent by a confederation of twenty, possibly more. We need to find a safe harbor, and fast.â€
The captain considered for a moment, and then began barking orders. “All sails up, crew! Niria, make sure the waves don’t swamp us. Tzil, keep the wind to a moderate level so the canvas doesn’t burst. We’re going to ride this storm out until we can reach the isle of Lithuslov.â€
Ren stood still as confusion immediately fell upon the ship, and the crew ran every-which-way, not sure what they were supposed to be doing. He wondered where Lithuslov was.
Then he had an idea. He ran up to the captain. “Sir, could I help the weatherweavers? You said I had talent.â€
“Not that kind. Fire talent. But you can ask them.â€
Ren trotted up to Tzil and Niria, standing with closed eyes in the middle of the hustle and bustle. “Could I help?†he asked, reluctant to disturb them.
Niria opened her eyes. She closed them, and opened them again. “Tzil. Look!†she said softly. Tzil opened his eyes.
“Did you want to help?â€
Ren nodded. “Can I?â€
“Not with this, but you have power.†And he closed his eyes again. Niria shrugged at Ren and went back to muttering spells.
Ren stood on the swaying deck, wishing he could be happy about “having powerâ€, but knowing it was no good.
[That scene is pretty good. It’ll need alteration, but what kind is unclear as of yet. It depends how much time has passed and whatnot.]
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 16:05The storm blew out of the south with unbelievable fury and suddenness. Massive towers of cloud piled up in the sky, crowned by lightning. A colossal wave rode the sea before it, driven by the mad wind. The Sea Roc was lifted up by the wave and flung through the air like a toy. Tzil and Niria rose into the air, wreathed in glittering chains of electricity. Ren managed to grab hold of a bulwark and prevent himself from being swept away. Tam Eizid was not so lucky. The older boy was smashed off the deck by a freezing, gray plume of water. Several seabirds rode its crest, screaming triumphantly.
“Stormy petrels,†Captain Pye muttered. Then he shouted, “Throw Tam a line!†Another wave broke over the deck, making him cough and splutter. He knew the chances of saving Tam were virtually nil, but he had to try.
“It’s no good, Captain,†Tzil said. His voice rang like a bell through the clamor of the storm, even though he didn’t raise his voice. “I recognized those petrels. One of them had a scar above its eye.â€
“How does a petrel get a scar like that??â€
“I put it there. Those aren’t petrels, they’re wave spirits, and they’re in the service of Rake Vashkar, weatherweaver of the Blood Storm.â€
Soon the storm began to clear, leaving with the petrels. Captain Pye went down below, and the crew hurried around, trying to clean up the mess left by the storm. Ren stood on the deck, shocked and sad. He had never even got a chance to meet Tam properly, and now he was dead- or captured by the Sanguiz Empire.
Tzil and Niria were asleep down below, tired out by their efforts to quell the storm. Captain Pye was doing who knows what in his cabin. Ren was all alone.Tam kept his head above water for as long as he could, and eventually the storm quieted. He floated on his back, watching petrels that shouldn’t be there flying above him. Every now and then one would seem to lose shape for a moment, only to resume the form of a petrel a little later. Tam’s head swam, and he realized his limbs were all numb. He wouldn’t survive much longer in this cold.
Then a ship loomed above him. Tam gave a weak yell and attempted to swim out of the way. His frozen legs would hardly obey him. Someone on the ship shouted something, and then down came a rope, whistling through the air from the very high deck of the ship. Tam grabbed it, and was hauled up onto the ship.
“What is it?†asked a voice, accompanied by hurried footsteps.
“Found a boy in the water, sir. ‘E’s half dead.â€
“A boy? Really?†The voice seemed much too interested, and not in a good way. “Where do you imagine he came from?â€
“I don’t know, sir. But he looks like pirate-kind to me.â€
“A pirate! Ah! Bring him to my cabin!â€
“Yes, Mr. Vashkar, sir,†said the seaman, and then Tam lost his senses, and heard no more.Ren leaned over the edge of the boat, watching the waves from the storm get smaller and smaller; only creating small splashes now. He heard a shout, and turned around suddenly, almost tangling himself in a net crumpled up by his feet. Someone was standing at the stern of the boat, shouting.
“What in the name of -†Captain Pye stormed out of his cabin, but was stopped mid-step when he saw what was going on.
The ship’s Pukis, Marmalade, stood on the deck in dragon form, hissing furiously and spitting fire. Across from it lay a petrel, wounded and unable to walk or change shape.
Tzil walked over to the petrel-spirit that was lying on the deck. He kicked Marmalade to the side, cursing under his breath. Marmalade spat a small ball of fire at him, then turned back into a kitten and ran over to Captain Pye.
Tzil examined the petrel-spirit, noticing it had a red feather on its right wing, and a scar right above its left eye. “Letor,†whispered Tzil. “Letor! Wake up, I command you!â€
The petrel-spirit, Letor, woke up, coughed, and glared at the weatherweaver standing over him.
“Where are they?†Tzil demanded, seizing Letor by one wing. He shook the bird, which grunted in a decidedly un-birdlike way. Letor squinted, trying to turn into a coyote or something that could nip Tzil, but he couldn’t. He was too exhausted.
Tzil shook him again. “Where are they taking Tam?â€
Letor feigned a puzzled look.
“I know they have him,†spat Tzil. “That’s why Vashkar sent the storm. He’s tried it before. Now where are they taking him?â€
Letor laughed wearily. “I’ll never tell you.â€
“Niria!†Tzil called. “Grab the matches. We’re having wave-spirit for dinner tonight!â€
“Fine, fine! I’ll tell you!†exclaimed Letor, fearing for his life. “They are going to Helean City, where Mordran is preparing for the fight of all Sphaere!â€
“Who’s Mordran?†piped up Ren.
“The Emperor’s Commander-in-chief,†replied Captain Pye.
“Do they have any idea of his powers?†Tzil continued his interrogation.
“No,†gasped Letor. “What powers?â€
“Then why do they want him?â€
“Bait. He’s a favorite of yours, isn’t he, Captain? You won’t just let him die.â€
“But we still have the advantage,†said the captain under his breath.
How wrong he was.
Even Tzil had no idea what good liars wave spirits were.
[I just don’t like this scene. It could be done better, and besides, I don’t like Tam and don’t think he should be a “favorite.” Actually all of my dislike for this scene comes from personal opinion.]Tam woke in a dark room. It was a few minutes before he realized that his hands were tied to the sides of the hard, wooden chair he was sitting on. An alchemical lamp, a crystal globe filled with phlogiston, shone blindingly into his face. As a result, the features of the man sitting across from him were unclear. The voice, however, was anything but. It cut through his throbbing head like a knife.
“Hello, Tam Eizid.â€
“Who are you?†Tam rasped. “How do you know my name?â€
“My faithful spirits have been following the Sea Roc for several weeks. The only reason we haven’t attacked it is that we didn’t want to damage you.â€
“Why the heck am I so important?â€
“Tell me, Tam. Are you happy aboard the Sea Roc?â€
“Well, Captain’s pretty strict, and I don’t have the best position, but it’s better than the life I left behind…â€
“I could get you a job aboard the Blood Storm. Any position, even first mate. Wages of up to ten aurums a day, luxurious lodgings- oh, anything you desire.â€
Tam snorted. It sounded like a good deal, but these things always did at first, and he wasn’t sure he trusted this silver-tongued stranger. “What’s the catch?â€
“We want you to do us a favor.â€
“What is that?â€
The man reached into a deep pocket and pulled out a small, golden globe, engraved with images of all the lands of Sphaere. It gleamed in the light from the phlogiston lamp, but also seemed to produce a more subtle light from within.
“We want you to use this in the service of Emperor Sanguinus IX.â€
[Ah…love this scene.]
“Ah…†said Tam. He didn’t know if he should accept the offer. Something sounded fishy about this man and all he had to offer. “Can I think about it?†he asked.
“Sure, sure… take as much time as you want…just remember the Blood Storm is waiting for you.†And with that the man stood and left the cabin.
[This is only a little bit wrong. While I doubt that Tam would seize the position right away, he’d probably react differently. I think he’d be less vague. But I’m getting trivial now. I’ll try to focus on big things.]
Tam rested his head against the surprisingly hard wooden wall. It looked brand new, unlike the wood of the Sea Roc, which still held up well, but was starting to show signs of weathering, and always seemed damp. He did not trust the strange man, however intriguing his offer was. Something about his spirit and the Sea Roc…and the emperor.
Two years ago, Tam had stowed away on an exploring ship, heading out of Sphaere. Halfway across the Inner Sea, the Sea Roc had attacked them. Tam, who had remained hidden for weeks, was discovered by the first mate. Given the choice between death and a job aboard the pirate ship, Tam chose the obvious. He was made cabin boy, but was strangely unused to work, and that along with his haughty manner had set the crew against him. But the pirates, even Octavio Pye, knew nothing of his past. Tam had managed to mostly forget it himself, too, and that was all that mattered.
Tam had been trained, in those two years, never to trust the emperor or any of his minions. Which was why he was reluctant to take the offer. But what would happen if he refused?Ren leaned heavily against the rail, watching the sun set, and asked the captain a question that had been floating around in his mind.
“How did you know that Tam and I were the ones with the fire power stuff?â€
“That is an interesting question. We found out from a captured fortuneteller on our ship. The man had a vision in which he saw your face, and luckily he was good at sketching likenesses. It was pure luck that we found you the way we did, however. We knew you were in Hermetopolis, but we’d expected something a bit quieter than what actually happened.â€
“What happened to the fortuneteller?â€
“Oh, him? We made him walk the plank. Niria found him sneaking around the ship with a dagger one night. She cornered him and found out he was trying to kill me, although why is a mystery I will never find the answer to.
“Now Tam, he was harder to figure it out. By the time we’d got the fortuneteller, we knew he was one of the Powerful, but it took us a while to figure it out. Tam had served aboard our ship for a whole year before we learned his secret. Not even he knew he was a Powerful. It was in his actions. When we first captured him, er, hired him, we noticed that Marmalade took a sudden liking to him, which was very strange. Other times, when we he was swabbing the deck for example, swarms of fish would surround our ship and one time, during a fierce sea storm, a dolphin even appeared and did a flip in the air, before diving back underwater. But the thing that really gave him away was when he entered my cabin one day, looking very upset and all of the candles went out.â€
“Does Tam know he is a Powerful?†Ren asked.
“No, not yet. And now he might not ever,†said the captain, a faraway look in his eyes.
“Why did you tell me but not Tam?â€
“Because you stumbled on the treasure room and he didn’t. And…I’m not really sure about Tam.â€
“What do you mean?â€
Octavio hesitated. “I can’t really place my finger on it, you know. The whole situation just makes me uneasy. I suppose because he won’t tell us anything about his past, for one. Although it’s none of by business, none of my business at all. And yet it’s always nagging at him, you can tell. Something certainly is. And when he first came on board… he talked in his sleep. He was terrified of everything. He seemed to be afraid of us, or someone, ‘finding him out’, as he put it.â€
Ren pondered this. This certainly was an odd business, and somehow he couldn’t wrap his head around it all. It had all happened so fast, to think, only that same day, there had been a pounding on the door, and then he had watched, horrified, as the soldiers had killed Perlan Ethor. Only today. And now he had a new power, a new life, new acquaintances.
The storm had calmed long ago, and the Sea Roc was drifting slowly in a gentle breeze. The horizon was featureless except for a purple-gray blur to the north.
“What is that?†Ren inquired.
Pye followed his gaze. “The isle of Lithuslov. We’ll stop there for now. Who knows what sort of weather Rake Vashkar is sending towards us. We’ll be able to survive a storm better if we’re in a harbor.â€
“But Lithuslov is uninhabited.â€
“Huh. That’s what the Empire would like you to think. There used to be a small village of Pukis trappers-â€
Marmalade hissed, interrupting him. Pye glared at the Pukis, then continued.
“-which is now a thriving free port, the biggest in the six Free Isles.â€
“Will they have food?†Ren asked. He was suddenly ravenous.
“Food?†repeated the captain. “Food as you have never seen before, Ren. The wealthy have skreeth egg omelets and orange punch for breakfast. Of course,†he added at Ren’s awed expression, “we’ll probably be eating stale bread and drinking sour beer at some moldy old inn, but one can still dream.â€
“Oh.†Ren stared disappointed out at the dark waves. “How do you know what the wealthy eat, anyway?â€
“I wasn’t always a rebel, you know. Once I was the honored captain of His Imperial Majesty’s good ship Harmony. I had many a good meal in that time. But when Sanguinus killed my brother, I became a pirate. For vengeance. Or at least it was then. Now, I’m not so sure.â€
[Not a bad scene, but we’ve made too many changes. They didn’t know Ren had fire power, it’s (probably) been much longer than a day, and there he is rubbing shoulders with Octavio Pye again. Not to mention that Lithuslov is one of the Free Isles, which Ren abviously knows about. I don’t think he’d think they’re uninhabited. And the food thing is totally random. But there are important bits too, like Tam’s Mysterious Past and such like (although the bit “…he entered my cabin…” is a problem).]“Hello!†called an imperious -and female- voice. “Vashkar! Are you in there?â€
Tam said nothing, but tried to remember if he had ever heard the name Vashkar before.
“Vashkar!†repeated the voice. “I want to go swimming. You must warm up the water for me.†When there was still no reply, the owner of the voice marched into the cabin. “It’s awfully dark in here,†she complained, and a light flared up.
“Oh!†said the girl. She was about Tam’s age, with brown hair down to her lower back, and her features were ominously familiar. The emperor’s features, but softer and more girlish.
The light went out.
“Who are you?†Tam said as the light flared back into life a moment later.
“I could ask the same to you,†the girl hissed. “What are you doing in here? It’s PRIVATE. So leave.†She put her hands on her hips and looked much like Marmalade when she was disturbed from her rest.
“I’m in here because some weird guy told me to be. And you?â€
“I’m here to keep all these stupid men in check and to stop them from caring for stowaways,†she snapped. “In other words, you.â€
“I’m not a stowaway!†said Tam hotly. “I’m a cabin boy!â€
“We already have fifteen of them. We don’t need another.â€
“I’m not a cabin boy here. On my ship.â€
“Well then, what are you doing here?â€
“I was washed overboard and this ship picked me up. Now leave me alone.†Tam turned his back on her.
“What’s your ship’s name?†asked the girl.
“Why should I tell you?â€
“Because I am your superior. I am the fourth child of Emperor Sanguinus IX.â€
“Even less reason to tell you!†Tam shot back before he could stop himself. “Now leave me alone, for the last time.â€
“Even less…†mused the fourth child of Emperor Sanguinus IX. She looked at Tam suspiciously. “Who are you, exactly?â€
“Tam Eizid, cabin boy.â€
The imperial girl chewed one her long fingernails. As Tam was wondering how they stayed so long if she bit them, it grew a quarter of an inch. She saw him staring.
“I have alchemical talent.†It was most definitely a boast. It also seemed to get her off the track of wondering who he was. She held out her hand, and Tam took it gingerly. “I’m Tera,†she said.
“Hello, Tera,†said Tam, feeling slightly more confident. That was shattered as she added, “You, of course, will call me Princess.â€
The man who had been interrogating Tam walked in, his expression blank. “I’ve done it, Princess. The water around the ship is warmed up,†he said obsequiously. However, as he executed a slight bow, a sneer of utter contempt flickered across his face. It said: I know you are currently my superior, but when the tables are turned, you will have to watch out.
[But later in the book he’s revealed to be completely loyal to the Emperor…Maybe he just hates Tera.]
“Good,†said Tera and left without so much as a thank you.
The man – Vashkar – turned to Tam with a sigh. “And how do you like Her Imperial Highness?â€
Tam shook his head. “I don’t want the orb, and I don’t want this stupid power. This is worse than the Sea Roc. This is worse than what came before…†A lone tear traced its way down his cheek, and the candles guttered.
“You are tired,†said Vashkar suavely. “You will no doubt feel differently after a rest. Come, I will lead you to your cabin.†Tam let himself be led like a child to a soft berth, where he immediately fell into a deep and welcome slumber.Ren watched the strange island growing closer and closer. It was abundant with trees and he saw a gigantic flame in the center of the island, glowing against the darkening sky.
“Captain,†Ren asked. “Why is there an enormous fire on the island?â€
“Aye, that is part of their survival,†the Captain answered. Ren gave him a surprised look.
“The Pukises are beings of flame,†Pye continued. “Just as wave spirits are beings of water. Then there are the orti and trosses, which are spirits of earth and air respectively. That flame is a Pukis nesting ground. The kittens are much more fiery when they hatch. Sort of the same as a baby rattlesnake is more poisonous than its parents, because it doesn’t have fine control over its poison glands.â€
“Oh,†said Ren, and went back to staring at that flickering beacon on the isle. “So they’re fire creatures, like me and Tam. That’s why Marmalade took a liking to him.â€
The Captain nodded.
Ren mused silently for a long while. Finally he said, “Two is an even number, you know.â€
“Yes,†agreed Octavio Pye. “What are you getting at?â€
“In all the old stories, odd numbers are magical, and even numbers are ordinary. Everyone knows that. So why are there only two with fire talent?â€
Captain Pye sighed. “There were more of them once, the fortune-teller said. But they all died in a dreadful fire hundreds of years ago. Only a few people escaped who carried the gift, and their grandchildren’s grandchildren passed it on. But often a child or even an adult would get to near a fire, that shouldn’t have hurt them, but they would burn to death.â€
“Why would they burn?†asked Ren, thinking of the myriad burns he had received standing to close to the fire, and the time he had almost died of a dreadful fever when he was six. A fever was a fire, of a sort.
“Don’t you know?†replied the Captain, surprised. “All those who have talent, of any kind, can only be killed by that element, and steel, such as knives and swords. That is why there were so few with water power after the Deluge. Only those with fire power seem to be more susceptible than others.â€
“Still, might it be possible that there’s another?†Ren said wistfully.
Captain Pye snorted. “Well, that would be a funny story. Here I was thinking that I’ve got the only two in existence and then there’s another? Pfft. One in a million. No, one in a billion. Sorry boy, but with how common fires are nowadays, there’s no chance that there’s another one like you out there.â€
“And Tam’s probably been burned at the stake right now.â€
“If he’s lucky.â€
“What do you mean, Captain?â€
“The Blood Storm’s crew may be vile and cruel, but they’re not stupid. If they figure out what power Tam’s got he’ll wish he’d been dead.â€
“You mean they’ll torture him?â€
“Probably, if he doesn’t do what they want. If he does do what they want, it may be like torture.â€
“What do you mean?â€
“According to all the sources of information on the Orb of Centaur, it’s a very exhausting thing to use. And the Empire won’t be letting him rest all that often. They’ll be after you, too, when Tam’s not able to work it anymore.â€
“You mean… dead?†Ren faltered. The Captain did not answer, but his silence seemed to confirm it.
“Well then, we have to rescue him!†cried Ren. This was not mere heroism; it was the longing for another one like him, to be less alone.
“Certainly we do,†said the Captain. “And we will. But for now, they don’t know of his powers. He’s just bait for me. He won’t have the best time of it, but he won’t be tortured yet, either. And in the meantime, we lack fresh fruit. We have to have some, before the crew dies of scurvy. When we’ve refreshed ourselves at Lithuslov, then we can rescue Tam.â€
[I’m not even going to bother italicizing that one…more Pye-Ren conversation.]
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 17:25Oh, wait. Those italics are supposed to end at “Now I’m not so sure.” And then start again at the “sneer of utter contempt” sentence.
[The HTML Gnome hopes the corrections are correct. –Admin.]
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Alice
in July 17th, 2008 @ 17:4146- Yes! Thank you, HTML Gnome!
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 17th, 2008 @ 21:0542) Oh that scene. I thought so. I despise that scene as well. In fact, it has always been my least favorite.
43) Wow. I’d never noticed that part about Ren “coming to” when he had been totally conscious a moment before! Maybe we could make it a little easier and knock him out. I’ve always enjoyed knocking out characters. It gives me a kind of thrill.
I am all for deleting the awkward scene. As I said, I never liked it. It annoyed me every time I read it. I especially don’t like that part when Captain Pye tries to tell Ren to not be scared of him. I mean, that is very unrealistic.
45) I can understand why Vashkar would react that way to Tera. I mean, she’s not hard to dislike. Also, isn’t Vashkar more leaning toward being loyal to Morzan than to the empire?
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Alice
in July 18th, 2008 @ 00:3248-
1) Yeah, I know.
2) I think I’ve tired of knocking out our characters, but I was very into it during Terraformed.
3) See, the thing is, Donaldo was making Pye all weird and scary, and I tried to fix it and made it so much worse. I HATE HATE HATE that scene.
4) Oh, no. He’s very loyal to Mordran, but “if he knew what Mordran had been planning, he would have leaped overboard and raced to warn the Emperor at once.” (Or something like that…)
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 18th, 2008 @ 06:58Oh. Oops.
His name is Mordran. I always mix up his name with Morzan, though I don’t know why.
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Alice
in July 18th, 2008 @ 12:45A few thoughts:
1) Is there any way we can make the whole steel/magic/death thing a little easier to understand? Maybe explain that since steel is anti-magic, it can kill people who would otherwise only be able to die from magic?
2) About those Pye/Ren conversations. I think we could change at least a few of them to Vushtek/Ren conversations, since he’s the alchooktor and probably considerably more easy to talk to than the captain. Plus, I think that Vushtek needs more development as a character. So does Tzil.
3) We need some ordinary sailors who also have personality. The don’t need to be big main characters, but just a few people, maybe friends of Ren’s. Maybe some of them die in the Blood Storm attack, I don’t know. Just to add more dimension. Plus they could inform the powder monkeys of rumors, like that Captain Pye is on a mission to take over Sphaere, or that he used to be a Navy man until his brother died. That kind of thing.
4) I was going to say something here. But I forgot.
The next morning they sailed into Pukislyn, the biggest Free Port inside or outside of Sphaere. The Sea Roc dropped anchor in the harbor and most of the crew rowed to the quay. Ren, Niria, and Captain Pye were among the people in the longboats. Tzil stayed behind with the watch to make sure Letor didn’t escape.
The city was twice as busy as Hermetopolis, and nearly everyone was accompanied by a Pukis. Those that weren’t were wearing beautiful coats ranging in color from ivory touched with gold to a deep, fiery red, and it didn’t take a genius to deduce why these people didn’t have Pukises riding on their shoulders. Obviously the Pukis fur trade was not as diminished as Captain Pye would like to think.
Marmalade dove and leapt through the crowd, touching noses with every other Pukis she met. In her excitement she couldn’t quite decide which form to stay in, so she was switching from dragon to kitten and back again every instant.
Ren laughed, because in watching the small creature twirl and dance he could, for a moment, forget about his often-annoying power.
Unfortunately, the feeling didn’t last long.
While Ren laughed at Marmalade, he felt a weight settle on his shoulder. His mirth ceased abruptly. He looked up. A gold-orange Pukis sat there, in dragon form. A slight pressure against his legs made him look down, to see a trio of Pukises in cat form, two ivory and one flame-blue, rubbing against his ankles. “Oh, no,†he heard Captain Pye say, but the arrival of another of the creatures on his other shoulder, and one on his head, made it rather difficult to pay any attention to the world around him.
When every available place on Ren had been filled, the fire beings had to settle for trotting as close to him as possible, or flying around him. He couldn’t move a muscle. There was a brief scuffle on his head as Marmalade claimed her rightful throne. He knew the whole crowd was staring, though he couldn’t see past the sea of kittens and dragons.
He could hear Captain Pye muttering curses, and Niria trying to disturb the Pukises with her water magic, and hostile mutterings from the crowd, and then a child shrieking, “Nina, Nina!†and his left shoulder became a little lighter for a moment, as the child pried a Pukis off it. But not for long. The Pukis, Nina, dug her claws deep into his shoulder, and he yelped in pain. “Go on, Nina!†he cried, but not really aloud, only in his head. With a purr that sounded almost like speech, the Pukis released her claws and let herself be cuddled by the little girl, who was staring at Ren as though he was some sort of- Pukis-napper.
But now Ren knew how to get them to leave him alone. He thought hard at them to leave, and one by one, they flew off, until Ren was left with the flame-blue one on one shoulder and Marmalade on the other.
Marmalade fluttered over to Captain Pye after a few minutes, leaving only the flame-blue one on his left shoulder. It refused to leave.
Come on! he silently pleaded, but the Pukis would not leave. Ren caught sight of a portly man with a Pukis-pelt scarf making his way towards them. He was holding an empty cage of what looked like solid water, made by a waveworker. The Pukis seemed to notice the man too, because it dug its claws deeper into Ren’s flesh.
Ah, so that’s how it is, Ren thought at the Pukis. Don’t worry; I’ll get you out of here.
The man with the Pukis-pelt scarf came towards Ren, who was watching him intently. Captain Pye seemed to be watching Ren, wondering what his next action was.
“Come here, Pooky, Pooky,†cooed the trapper. “Here girl.â€
The Pukis hissed and turned into its cat form.
The trapper looked at Ren. “Here, little boy. Bring her to me! She’s mine ya know!†the trapper said.
“No!†Ren yelled. His body was hot and tense. He was trembling with anger, and another, more overpowering sense of fear that he was almost positive was coming from the Pukis. Ren took off running. He heard the shouts of the trapper, Niria, and Captain Pye behind him, but he would not stop. He ran past people of every race and every size. Many of them passed him without noticing. He looked over his shoulder and saw the man running after him. The trapper was getting closer and closer. Ren could barely run anymore. He was about to collapse. The Pukis’ claws were digging hard into his shoulder. One thought came to his mind: flamulo podias. Ren had no idea where that thought came from, or what it meant, but he suddenly stopped running. He turned around and the man was looking at his feet. They were on fire, but Ren felt no pain.
Ren watched the fire fearfully as it licked his ankles. The Pukis hissed alternately at the flames and the trapper, who was staring frozen at Ren’s feet. Ren recalled the captain’s words: “Those with fire power seem to be more susceptible than others.†The little conflagration was gaining power, and now it was halfway up his calves. And now it hurt. Time seemed not to exist as he watched his lower body be consumed in fire.
Then the Pukis on his shoulder sprang into action. She scrambled down his shirt and puckered her lips, switching to dragon form as she did so. With a loud slurp, she inhaled the fire, ballooning out her cheeks. The trapper sprang away, but he wasn’t fast enough. With a loud sound like an alchemical explosion mixed with a massive belch, the Pukis spat a huge ball of bluish flame at her former master. The fat man’s fancy, white wig exploded into cinders, and he was left with a meager crop of thinning brown hair and several sooty marks on his face.
The Pukis shifted back into kitten form. Ren walked away with what he hoped was a jaunty, confident step, the soles of his feet screaming in pain as they touched his rough sandals.
As soon as he deemed the man far enough away, he sat down, pulled off his shoes, and examined his feet. They were badly blistered, but he might be able to make it back to the quay…if he could find it.
“Where is Captain Pye!?†Ren suddenly thought as he sat down with a thud. “I must have lost him in all the confusion. What on Sphaere am I going to do?â€
[I dunno, I don’t care for this scene. The beginning needs expansion (I can’t seem to write action without being infuriatingly vague) and it quickly becomes confusing, what with fire words and all. I wouldn’t mind if we got rid of fire words all together.]
Suddenly a foreign thought touched his mind. He shrieked, leaping up and raising his fists in helpless self-defense, then wincing as his burned feet and ankles protested. The thought hit him again, and he drew a wary breath. Another small thought called out to him. “Who are you?†he snarled. Now that somebody had mastered mind touching, apparently, keeping his secret hidden from the empire would be more difficult than he thought.
However, the next thought felt not harsh and threatening, like he expected, but almost gentle. But really, who would want to be gentle if they could read minds?
A sound like a crackling flame seared through his head and the soles of his feet began to throb worse than before. “Aaaaaargh!†he yelled. In a second, the feeling passed, but when he opened his eyes there sat the Pukis from the marketplace, the blue one with the shiny orange eyes.
“Felt that, did you?†the voice purred, and finally Ren understood who the mysterious mind reader was.
“There is a water spirit in the vicinity,†the Pukis continued. “His essence chills me. I believe my old master is speaking with him. Over there!â€
The last thought switched from a gentle purr to a harsh yowl. Ren swiveled around just in time to overhear some of the conversation.
“…definitely had fire talent. Did you see how the Pukises were drawn to him?â€
“I did. Vashkar will be pleased. Mordran may even see fit to reward you.â€
The latter speaker was a mysterious figure in a blue cloak. Just as Ren tried to get closer, the figure exploded in a blast of freezing spray. A stormy petrel rose from the churning water and flew off to the East.
Ren felt as though his stomach was filled with sour milk. “They know,†he whispered.
“We have to get back to the Captain,-um- what should I call you?†said Ren.
“No need to be so loud,†thought the Pukis. “Call me…†Here it thought something unpronounceable.
“What!†Ren ejaculated, accidentally out loud. “Sorry,†he thought more quietly, “but I can’t possibly say that. Can I call you Alexis?â€
“I suppose,†the Pukis thought back. “Now, we must get you back to you Captain. I must lay my eggs soon, but first I have to get you to safety.â€
Ren knew he had to get back to Captain Pye, but how? Suddenly, a thought came to his mind from the Pukis. “Use your power. Back there, when you scared away my owner, you used some. Try it now.â€
“But how?†Ren asked.
“You mustn’t focus on using your powers yet. If you do that when you have no control, they will not work. Just let them come to you.†So Ren sat there at the bench, tending to his legs and watching the ships go by.
After about an hour, he stood up and glared at the Pukis. “This isn’t working!†he exclaimed.
“Be patient,†said the Pukis. “Later, you will learn how to use your powers in the here and now, but this is not the right time.â€
So Ren sulked for about another half hour, but finally a word came to his mind. Flamulo helioso, were the words. As if it were a reflex, Ren closed his eyes, and spread out his arms. He had no control over this, and when he tried to put his arms down, they sprung up again. He felt some heat on his arms, and when he finally opened his eyes, his arms were on fire. The Pukis was flying next to him. Ren looked down: they were a good 50 feet above the island. Ren saw the Sea Roc and then glanced over at the Pukis, which was flying with him. “Quick! Get over to the ship before you become susceptible to the fire and burn!â€
Ren flapped his arms and dove towards the ship like a falcon. When he got close to the ship, he slowed and landed with a thump on the deck. The fire on his arms sputtered and spat and then went out.
Captain Pye walked over to Ren and grabbed his shoulder. “What in Sphaere have you done, boy?â€
He then flew into a towering rage. Ren nodded at the appropriate times, but he couldn’t concentrate. His thoughts kept drifting off to join Alexis’s, and every time, she would prod him back into focusing on the Captain. Even so, he hardly heard a single word from Octavio Pye until the berating ceased abruptly.
“What?†asked Ren, startled out of his reverie.
“Your legs!†said Octavio Pye, aghast.
“What? Oh.†Ren looked down at his legs. His pants were burnt up to the knee, and what of his legs was visible was blistered. “It doesn’t hurt that much,†he lied.
“Go to your hammock right now!†the Captain commanded, fiercely staring Ren down. “Even fire WOUNDS can be dangerous to you. I believe they take you down from the inside.â€
Ren obediently walked to his hammock and lay down in it. Now that he thought about it, he hadn’t actually slept on it much. He lay his head down and began to doze off.
“Wake up, boy!†the voice of Octavio Pye said, searing through Ren’s groggy head. “Now, I want you to tell me exactly what happened to you. Don’t leave anything out. And I’m especially interested in learning how you came upon THIS.†With his last word he yanked the furry figure of Alexis from behind his back and waved her in front of Ren’s face. “Do you want Marmalade to be so jealous that she burns our entire ship into the sea?â€
“Marmalade would do that!†Ren was shocked.
“She most certainly would,†said Captain Pye grimly. “She’s had a hand in sinking most of the ships we ever pirated, and she could certainly sink this one.â€
Alexis sank her teeth into Captain Pye’s hand and jumped onto Ren’s bed.
“Alright,†said Ren slowly. “I’ll tell you the whole story.†And so he did, starting with the Pukis trapper, and ending with the fact that he could speak to Alexis.
“That’s very well and good, Ren,†said Octavio, “but if you’re going to use your powers, you need to use them with good judgment. A fire powerful carries more magic than an alchemist or a stormmaster could hold, and if it’s misused you could virtually destroy Sphaere, or the Inner Sea at the very least.â€
Ren stared, incredulous. Suddenly his head snapped back with a jerk. Alexis looked into his eyes innocently.
“Sheesh, get a grip on yourself,†she thought calmly, only half joking. “You need to stop acting so surprised every 3 seconds when you learn about yet another of your powers. Considering how many more there are to come…â€
“What!?†Ren said, shocked. “I have more?â€
“What’s wrong, Ren?†the Captain asked worriedly.
“Nothing.â€
“Are you sure?†For some reason the Captain was suddenly very concerned. “You’re talking to yourself.â€
“I’m talking to Alexis,†said Ren.
“Ah. About Alexis. We’re going to have to work something out with her and Marmalade. I understand that she’ll have to stay on the ship, but I’d rather not end up in the sea with a blackened hull for a ship.â€
Captain Pye stood up and walked out of the cabin, going to find Marmalade. Alexis followed, and Ren was alone. Or so he thought. He flopped back on the hammock, and once again his thoughts turned to Tam Eizid, that unknown personality. How he wanted to share his wonder with someone! So much new power, and only one other person could have any idea what it was like.
He heard a rush of wind, and a very small, bright fire appeared a few feet away, hovering less than half an inch above the floor. “Did I start it?†he asked himself. Perhaps this was the beginning of the end. Maybe he had misused his power already, and Sphaere was doomed.
The fire grew bigger and bigger, and Ren, with a nightmare passivity, watched it grow larger, closer, brighter. Soon it would reach his hammock, and then him and – Ren couldn’t think about that. He closed his eyes tightly. Nothing happened, but an odd sensation came over him. He tried to cry out and failed. He opened his eyes to see images moving around him and heard voices. The images cleared away, and he was standing on a gray ship. No one took notice of him except for a boy swabbing the decks next to him. “I know you,†the boy muttered to himself. “Who…Ren?â€
Ren suddenly knew who the boy was. “Tam,†he breathed.
[Again, no italics. This piece as a whole is fine, but a) we need to cut down on the familiarity between the captain and the powder monkey, and b) the fire scrying is inconsistent with another description of it that comes later. And then there’s the fact that some of his magic has words and some of it doesn’t.]Captain Pye found Ren lying on the floor next to his hammock. He was asleep or in a trance, and appeared to be holding a conversation with a voice unheard.
Rake Vashkar looked at Tam. He was kneeling on the deck, a holystone in his hand and a bucket by his side. But he wasn’t scrubbing the deck. He was talking.
[Why is Tam scrubbing the deck? Again, it’s inconsistent. We at least need a connecting piece, because last we heard of him, he was sleeping in a nice soft berth.]“Where is this?†asked Ren.
“The Blood Storm,†replied Tam. “Well, not really. I’m not sure where we are. I was on the Blood Storm, a minute ago.â€
“Did you set something on fire?â€
“Me? No. Why?â€
Ren took a breath. “Did you know you have fire power, Tam?â€
“How do you know about that?â€
“Because I do too. I set my legs on fire. See?†He gestured to his blistered calves.
“Ouch,†said Tam sympathetically.
Ren frowned. Something had occurred to him. “You do know about your talent. Captain said you didn’t.â€
“The Blood Storm’s weatherweaver told me about it. He wants me to use some orb. He’s paying me an awful lot.â€
“Oh, no,†moaned Ren. But then the grayness that surrounded him and Tam closed in, bringing with it all the previous images. He cried out, and woke.As the gray mist faded and Tam came to himself, he found he was still sitting on the deck. His first thought was, what in Sphaere just happened?
His next thought was, I’m scrubbing the deck. What about all those fancy positions I was promised? But of course, he would only get a good position if he promise to work that orb. It was tempting, that was for sure.
Very tempting, in fact. Tam looked down at the holystone in his hand, and the vast expanse of deck that he was supposed to scrub. If he just accepted the offer, he would never have to do this again.
At any rate, what had the Empire ever done to harm him? Just because the pirates hated Sanguinus IX didn’t mean he had to. And what the Emperor did couldn’t be any worse than what the pirates did. Could it?
Never scrub the deck again… Any position, even first mate… Wages of up to ten aurums a day…
His mind was made up. Tam stood up purposefully and walked across the deck towards Rake Vashkar, who was talking angrily to a sunburned sailor. Tam summoned up his courage.
“I will use the Orb,” he said.
[All of this needs expansion. Particularly the last bit, about Tam.]Captain Pye’s face blurred into focus slowly, like water clearing after mud has been stirred up. “What happened, boy?” cried the Captain.
“They know!” Ren said urgently. “They’ve told him!”
“Told who? Who told him? Told him what?”
Ren sat up. “Vashkar told Tam, that he has fire powers. That means they know about it, which means that Tam isn’t safe no matter what he does.”
The Captain swore. “At least they don’t know about you.”
“Well, actually… ”
“WHAT, boy? Speak up.”
“That Pukis trapper told a disguised wave spirit that I had fire talent. The spirit mentioned Vashkar and Mordran.”
Pye cursed. Fumbling through his pockets, he pulled out an object that looked like a dried kraken tentacle. Gnawing convulsively on it, Captain Pye paced the deck, muttering “Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.”
Ren said nothing. He could see that it was a much larger dilemma than he could comprehend.
“Why is this such a problem, sir?” Ren asked. “I mean, they won’t need me until Tam can’t…” he realized what he was saying and broke off, guiltily. “And I’m sure we’ll have rescued Tam before he can really do any harm,” he amended hastily.
“Well…” the Captain hesitated. “There are two things they might do. They may try to capture you now so that when Tam dies, you can take over immediately, or they may combine your powers and gamble on not needing you after you have done your work.”
“Combine our powers?”
“Yes. Your powers merged, and with the globe, will make you two more powerful than anyone in Sphaere, except for the Unknowables.”
The Unknowables? Ren thought. What are those? Ren wanted to ask, but knew it was not the right time. Perhaps, later he would.
The captain and Ren were quiet for a long time, but Ren finally perked up. He said, in his most confident voice, “We must get Tam back, and we will.”
The Captain sighed. “I admire your confidence, Ren, but it may be too late.â€
[First mention of the Unknowables. It needs a little more drama to it.]Back on the Blood Storm, Vashkar was ecstatic. “This is wonderful news, Tam. I’m glad you saw our- ” He broke off, staring upward at a stormy petrel hovering above the topsail. It uttered a series of harsh croaks, and the stormmaster’s expression changed.
“They have another person with fire talent aboard the Sea Roc. Well, we can turn that to our advantage. Contact this person and tell him that you are being held captive aboard the Blood Storm at the Free Isle of Kievl. We’ll trap them there.”
“Contact him, sir?” Tam said.
“Through fire scrying. Like you did a few hours ago, before you passed out. Surely you know how?”
Tam looked away to hide his fear. He had no idea how Ren and him had contacted each other before. Anything was better than angering Vashkar, though, so he lied, “Of course I do. Why wouldn’t I?”
“Very good,” said Rake, and with that he walked away, leaving Tam to try and contact Ren by himself. He went down to his cabin, feeling sick.
Tam sat down on his bunk. This was the worst thing that had ever happened to him. Well, maybe not the worst… He shook his head sharply to clear that thought away and turned his, mind to something else. It had been a mistake to agree to the terms of the stormmaster. He could see that now. And yet, the thought of power beckoned him. As first mate, no one would dare to mock him. He had better try the fire scrying. Tam rolled onto his stomach and tried to remember what he had been thinking about when he had gone into a trance.
As Tam concentrated, he began to feel strangely hot around his extremities. I wonder if I’m getting a fever, he thought. Then he realized that, whatever was happening, it was not normal.
There was a loud, muffled fump, as though an alchemical cannon had gone off behind heavy doors. A small ball of white-hot flame hit the floor in front of him. At first, it was nebulous, flinging out small shreds of fire. Tam concentrated, willing it to help him contact Ren. To his surprise, it did, shrinking to a pinprick before vanishing in a burst of light that momentarily blinded him.
As Tam blinked away dazzling sunbursts of color, he saw that he was in the mysterious gray space that he had been in once before. Ren was standing in front of him, wearing a startled expression.
Tam quickly gabbled out what he was supposed to say. “I’m on the Blood Storm, berthed at the Isle of Kievl. Tell Captain Pye to send help- or, better yet, come himself!”Ren passed on the message, along with the fact that Tam had looked rather surprised and scared, spoken quickly, and broke contact as soon as he had finished talking, or sooner.
Captain Pye gnawed another kraken tentacle- unless it was the same one, Ren couldn’t be sure and didn’t know how tough kraken tentacles were- and thought about this.
Finally he heaved a great sigh and stood up. “We must rescue Tam. But I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”
“Why?” asked Ren.
“I don’t know, boy, I don’t know. It just…” he trailed off. Ren waited patiently for five long minutes before Pye spoke again. “Tam’s an odd one, and I don’t understand him. Certainly not when I can’t look him in the face.” And having delivered that uninformative and puzzling message, he left the cabin.
Three days later they reached the Isle of Kievl. The Captain was unnaturally edgy, and Ren was nervous too. He had tried to contact Tam, but the older boy hadn’t spoken to him, and had cut off the scrying as quickly as he could. It was probably just Tam’s captors making life unpleasant, he reassured himself.
Ren stood on deck, watching the jolly boats being lowered into the water. The Isle of Kievl was another of those “uninhabited” isles, but, in contrast to Lithuslov, it was practically empty. There were a few tiny villages and a port about half the size of Pukislyn, but nothing really big.
[Again, it needs expansion, and the fire scrying is inconsistent with the last description.]Tam felt a surge of guilt as he saw the Sea Roc come into harbor. He had tried to minimize the guilt and anxiety by not speaking to Ren, half-hoping that if he refused communication Ren would know it was a trap. But it hadn’t worked, as was clear from the trusting way Ren tried to contact. “We’ll rescue you, Tam,” he had said only an hour or so ago. “Don’t worry.”
“Oh, forget it,” Tam told himself now. “It’s not as though you owe them anything. Any rate, you have to take the chance you get.” He was beginning to wish he wasn’t the bait, and that he could go down into his cabin and curl up on the bunk and not come out until they were very far away. But that wasn’t going to happen, was it?
The crew of the Sea Roc brought it into the harbor and hung it into the shore. They let down the jolly boats and started making there way towards shore. Tam, shaking, put his hands behind the back, sending the first signal: Get ready.
The crew of the Sea Roc were on the shore now, getting out of their boats, and looking around at the island. Tam jumped up: Weapon set. Captain Pye told the crew to stay there, and he and Ren walked towards Tam nervously, as if they were expecting something to jump out at them. How right they are, Tam thought.
Captain Pye and Ren were only about three feet away from him now. He lifted up his hands, causing looks of confusion on the captain’s face, and dropped them: ATTACK! was the signal.
A loud cry from the woods, and then more yells, and then sailors came running at Ren. One advanced towards Ren, swinging his wooden stick, and Ren heard Tam yell, and Captain Pye shout, “Retreat to the east!” and then everything went black.
When Ren woke up, Captain Pye and Tam were standing over him, worry knit in their eyebrows. Captain Pye was the first to speak. “We were able to keep you and Tam safe,” he said, “but they took our boats and killed twelve of our thirty men.”
“I’m sorry, Ren,” Tam said sadly.
“Oh, right,” said Ren bitterly. “I sure believe that. You could have at least hinted it was a trap, if you were too scared-” he spat the word out as though it were a wind-beetle- “to actually say outright.”
“I did!” cried Tam. “Why do you think I wouldn’t talk?”
“Boys,” said Captain Pye, breaking up what might have become a verbal fight, if not a physical one. “You can quarrel later; right now we have to think about escaping.”
“Escaping? You mean we’re prisoners?”
“Yes. But at least we’re not dead,” said Captain Pye.
“Where are we?” asked Ren, sitting up.
“We’re on the Isle of Kievl, in a stockade guarded by twenty-five warriors. We have to think of an escape plan.”
“Not me,” said Tam quietly. “I already made my choice. I’m going to work the Orb of Centaur for them. You could too, Ren. We could work it together, and live in the utmost comfort. It would be a wonderful life.” He looked hopeful, until Ren shook his head.
“Have you any idea what the Orb does to you, Tam? It’ll kill you if you work it!”
Ren looked around the stockade. Most of the crew members he’d met were still there. Vushtek di Fundermuult was lying on the ground, barely conscious, with a bloody rag wrapped around his arm. Niria Tolmark was hunched over in the corner, face buried in her hands, body shaking with sobs. Tzil Azuro was just coming round, staggering to his feet.
Tzil’s eyes rolled wildly, then focused on Tam. “You!” he roared. “Traitor!”
Ignoring Captain Pye’s alarmed cry, he snatched up a blazing phlogiston lamp from its alcove in the wall and hurled it straight at Tam’s chest.
Tam ducked, but although it missed his chest, it caught his hair on fire. Captain Pye whipped off his cap and used it to smother the flames.
“Tzil! What do you think you’re doing?”
“Getting rid of a traitor,” the haggard stormmaster hissed.
“I will not permit this! The boy is under my protection.”
“He forfeited his right to that protection when he betrayed us all!” Something in Tzil seemed to snap. He pulled out his knife.
Then the door opened. The appearance of the man standing in the doorway did nothing to advertise the fact that he was one of the most feared men in all of Sphaere. He had an almost apologetic look on his pale face, and he wore gold-rimmed half-moon glasses. He was wearing a white robe that would have been dangerously fashionable about two centuries before, and he was short. The overall effect was that of a scholar who’d gotten lost and was politely asking directions.
Still, Ren couldn’t help but notice the long, razor-sharp rapier hanging from his belt.
“Mordran,” Vushtek spat.
“Yes, the very same,” said the man. He peered around as though he was nearsighted, but Ren had the distinct impression that the glasses were for show, as was most of his outfit.
Whatever had made Tzil throw that lamp at Tam only snapped more when Mordran came in. Tzil raised his dagger and ran at Mordran. Mordran simply stepped aside as if nothing had happened and spoke calmly and quietly, almost in a whisper.
“I need the boys now,” he said.
“No. I will not let them go,” Captain Pye replied. Ren could not tell how he felt, his expression strange.
“Oh, I am afraid that you do not have a choice. They work the Orb, or I make them work it.” Mordran tapped at his head, although neither Tam nor Ren could tell what this meant. He went on: “My power has increased-only slightly, but enough for me to take them.”
Niria looked up at this, but still avoided everyone’s eyes. “Jarbun magic,” she said under her breath. Then she yelled, “What have you done to the Unknowables?”
“What’s she talking about?” said Ren. Captain Pye only shook his head, and Tam looked stricken.
“You needn’t take me,” said Tam hastily, stepping forward with a frightened expression. “I’ll go of my own accord.”
Ren felt put out. Everyone seemed to know about this but him. Nonetheless, he wasn’t going to work for Mordran. He would avoid it at all costs.
As a matter of fact, Tam knew a good deal less than Ren thought. At the mention of the Unknowables, however, he knew enough. He was not going to go through that again. It didn’t matter whether Mordran had killed them (they couldn’t die, he was almost certain), or taken their powers, but if Mordran was strong enough to do something to them where even Tam could not, Tam was not going to get on his bad side.
“I did nothing to them,” said Mordran, barely acknowledging Tam. “Nothing permanent, at any rate. They will recover their powers sometime in the next fifty years. Not so very long to them, but long enough to prevent them rescuing your lot.”
“What are the Unknowables?” asked Ren, and once more he was ignored.
Mordran grinned. “Come with me, both of you.”
Ren stood his ground, though he was shaking like a dry leaf. “No.”
“Come on,” Tam implored. “There’s no way to refuse him, and if you resist, he’ll just hurt you.”
“Your colleague is a lot smarter than you are,” Mordran said to Ren. “I’ll give you one last chance.”
“No,” Ren said, in a barely audible whisper.
A bolt of pain stabbed through his temples like a red hot bar of iron. He was irresistibly dragged toward the door.
“Blast!” Captain Pye exclaimed, and leaped at Mordran, pulling out an ornate flintlock. Mordran snarled in fury and gestured once. A spurt of green flame consumed the pistol, and Octavio Pye was hurled back ten feet. He hit the wall and lay still.
But Ren was temporarily free, and he was near the door. Shoving Tam aside, he leaped out the doorway. In midair, he yelled “Flamulo Helioso!”
Two crossbow bolts whizzed past him, but he was ascending rapidly, and soon the guards running about below him became only specks.
Ren landed on a high pinnacle of rock just as the fire blazing on his arms went out. Now, he thought, to find a way to rescue the rest of the crew.
Ren had never been particularly good at making plans. He was as good at executing them as anyone, but he lacked the talent for making them. Now he sat on the rock till the sun went down, blazing red over the ocean, but he still could think of nothing.
I can’t go to sleep, Ren thought. He was tired after staying up all night, but couldn’t go to sleep until he had a plan. But he was so tired. Maybe if he just closed his eyes for a few minutes. He was about to fall into deep sleep when suddenly, a voice appeared in his head. Was it his voice? No, Ren realized, it was a female. Ren was sure he had never heard this voice before, yet it sounded oddly familiar… Ren? Is that you? the voice said.
Yes. It is me, Ren replied.
Oh, splendid. I hoped I had contacted you and not that awful Mordran. He better not be overhearing us.
Ren was excited now, but scared at the same time. His eyes widened. He knew who this was.
Alexis? Is that you?
Yes, it is.
We need to rescue Captain Pye and the crew of the Sea Roc, thought Ren. And Tam.
Alexis made a disapproving thought. Ren, Tam may be too far gone to rescue. He is too frightened of the Unknowables to disobey Mordran.
What are the Unknowables? asked Ren. Finally, he would get some answers!
The Unknowables are gods, said Alexis after a long pause. She seemed reluctant to say more, but Ren was not going to let her get away without telling him everything.
They can’t be gods! he thought in disbelief. There are no temples to them, nothing! I didn’t even know about them till the other day!
The Empire banned them. No one was allowed to worship them, and slowly the people forgot. Only a few people still know of them. Tam is one.
But why? And how does he know? And how do you know that?
Alexis did not reply.
Alexis, please tell me! Ren begged.
Nothing.
At least tell me where you are, Ren pleaded.
Look up, she replied.
Ren did as he was told, and lo and behold, there was Alexis, softly flapping her dragon wings, and with her were… Ren gasped. Are those your children?
Yes, she replied, unhappily.
What is wrong?
Out of thirty eggs, only these three survived. The rest were caught by poachers and sent to incubation to be brought up and killed for their fur. Her voice was dripping with anger now.
I’m sorry, said Ren lamely.
Alexis sent a small thought of acknowledgement. That story can be told later. Right now, I have a plan.
We need a sail, Alexis said.
“Over there,” Ren said, though he was confused as to the plan. “On the Blood Storm.”
The Pukises, already in dragon form, flew down to the ship and sliced off the topsail in short order. Returning it to the rock, Alexis explained.
You’ll hold on to these corner ropes, and we’ll get up to our hottest while flying right under the sail. The hot air will buoy you up. Try to jump in the general direction of the guarded compound where your friends are. You’ll be high enough that the guards won’t see you. When we get right over it, we’ll cool down and burn a hole in the roof. The sail will act as a parachute, you’ll drop down into the room, your friends will grab hold of the lines, and- Do you have a stormmaster?
“Yes.”
Good. Then he’ll blow us back to the Sea Roc, and we’ll sail off.
Ren seized the lines, hoping he wasn’t making a huge mistake. The Pukises flared up, and the sail ballooned out. But Ren didn’t lift off.
Alexis closed her eyes, and a cloud of blue flame enveloped her. I’m pushing myself as far as I can. Go!
This time Ren was hauled a little into the air, with an effort that neither Alexis nor Ren seemed to enjoy. The lines cut into his hands, and the flame of the Pukises seemed frighteningly near. He took a deep breath, made a hurried prayer to no one in particular, and jumped.
For a minute Ren watched in terror as the ground grew larger and nearer at an unexpected rate, but then the heat on his hair grew stronger and he nearly cried out, but he was going up.
He didn’t know how long he could stand this. His arms felt like they were being pulled out of their sockets and he could feel the flame leaning towards him hungrily, despite the Pukis’ attempts to control it.
Then they were above the compound. A crossbow bolt shot upward and almost punctured the canvas, but missed by inches. The Pukises stopped blazing and flew down below Ren, blowing fireballs at the roof. At first, the thatch burned merrily, but then a large timber cracked, and the ceiling fell in just as Ren landed with a thump.
The pirates were much as before, with the exception of Tam and Tzil, both of which had disappeared. Captain Pye was pacing the floor in agitation, but stopped dead when Ren fell though the roof in a bundle of sail and Pukises.
The roof smoldered and blazed above. The pirates looked from it, to Ren, and back at the burning straw and wood again. Ren disentangled himself sail, stood up, and bowed shakily.
“Ren!” exclaimed Captain Pye. “How in Sphaere did you get away?”
“I flew,” said Ren. “Where’s Tzil?”
“Tzil?” said Pye. “I don’t – oh no.”
He raced outside, with Ren on his heels to find Tam backed up against the boards of the stockade, desperately trying to fight off a maddened Tzil, who was snarling and pressing his long knife to Tam’s throat. Tam spied Captain Pye and Ren and screamed to them. “Help!”
They raced to his aid, but before they could reach Tam, Tzil suddenly changed tact and plunged his blade into Tam’s chest.
Ren stopped dead.
“Finally, we are rid of that traitor!” roared Tzil in triumph. Then he realized what he had done, and froze. The look of shock on Tam’s face turned to one of rage, and eldritch fire began flowing up the knife in his chest, which Tzil was still grasping. The fire wrapped itself around Tzil’s arm as he struggled to break free, using his own power of try to ward it off, but to no avail. Suddenly a huge fireball engulfed his thrashing body and he flew up in the air, finally ripping his dagger from Tam’s chest as he ascended ablaze. Lighting overwhelmed the airborne inferno and drew the hardly recognizable form of Tzil into the clouds, where all stormmasters are taken by their element to die. The long dagger carried by Tzil in life quivered upright in the dirt. His eyes rolling back in his head, Tam collapsed on the ground.
Pye rushed to the boy’s side, but Ren stood frozen, staring at the unconscious Tam. It seemed all-wrong somehow. Sure, Tam had made a bargain with the Empire, sure, he was a traitor, sure, he no longer belonged to the pirates, but still! Ren couldn’t believe that Tzil had just…killed him. Just like that. And why hadn’t the guards come to Tam’s aid when they heard his call for help?
A thought came to Ren’s mind. He frowned, puzzled. It wasn’t a fire word, but it felt powerful even so. He spoke it softly, under his breath, and felt his mouth grow hot. He breathed deeply but quickly, and found that a light was shining out of his mouth, a flaming, purple, fiery light.
He felt eyes staring at him, and, as if in a trance, he moved his own fingers into the flame. It didn’t burn. On the contrary, as he watched, the myriad small cuts and scars on his hands closed up, vanished without a trace. He walked towards Tam, suddenly realizing what the fire did.
“REN!” Captain Pye yelled. “What in Sphaere are you doing?”
Ren did not reply. His mouth was full of fire, and his fingertips crackled with dancing, flickering, flames.
“Ren, you idiot!” screamed Pye. “It’ll kill you! It’ll kill him!” But his warning came too late, as the fire vanished in a shower of sparks. Tam looked no different than before, and slowly Ren sat down on the hard ground with his back against the stockade. He saw Alexis fluttering above him in dragon form, and Captain Pye looking aghast, and then he lay his head down on his knees, and fell into a deep, unnatural sleep.Mordran sat down in the wooden-and-gilt chair that was provided for him, breathing heavily. However Ren felt, Mordran felt ten times worse. It wasn’t easy, channeling the powers of a god through yourself and into another. Especially when the other was so far away. But it had worked, the man was sure of it. Even if the first boy never recovered, the second was helpless. Mordran must give the order now, before the shock of such power had worn off. He reached into his sleeve and pulled out an item resembling a silver bell. He shook it, and a single, high-pitched, note resounded through the room. When it had faded, all was quiet. Then, and only then, did Mordran allow himself to sleep.
[Talk about confusing. A lot of that is fine writing, and not all of it needs rewritten, but I’m too lazy to italicize everything that does. First, the attack. It’s poorly done, and again, none of the crew members have names or personality. I feel we really need to change that. Second, when Ren leaves, they’re in the middle of an attack. When he comes back hours later, not even Tam in gone. What the heck? Third, Jarbun magic/Unknowables. This makes it all so much more confusing. We could easily expand the Mordran bit of the scene to explain that he’s channeling power through Ren, maybe even the power of the Unknowables. But if we leave it as it is, it’s too too too confusing. Fourth, Tzil. I like the way he “dies,” but we all know he doesn’t die, right?]
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Cat's Meow
in July 18th, 2008 @ 13:10What am I supposed to be doing?
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Alice
in July 18th, 2008 @ 13:5052- I dunno. I’m going through the entire story and looking at what needs to be rewritten and why. You could do the same. Or you could just think about the story and what’s wrong with it and what needs changing. Or something.
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The Man For Aeiou
in July 18th, 2008 @ 14:23We had way to many people. That’s, At least to me, the worst part of the story.
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Alice
in July 18th, 2008 @ 14:3754- What are you talking about? I agree that we switched too quickly from character to character, but we don’t have too many characters.
Well, maybe too many important characters. I would be quite happy to get rid of Letor, at least as anything more than a character with a couple of lines.
-makes list of characters-Ren
Pye
Tam
Arn
Niria
Tzil
Vushtek
The bartender’s daughter
Tera
Mordran
Alexis
Marmalade
Vashkar
Letor
Sharpnose
The Unknowables
Jack Whatsisname
Scrimage
BartenderAnd most of them don’t need bits of writing from their POV (not all of them even have bits of writing from their POV).
But anyway, what characters do you suggest we do away with? I think a lot of them can be faded into the background, and some of them (like Scrimage and Letor, probably) could be done away with altogether.
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The Man For Aeiou
in July 18th, 2008 @ 15:07I don’t know what to get rid of, I just think that was the problem in the writing.
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Alice
in July 18th, 2008 @ 15:4156- OK. Thanks.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 18th, 2008 @ 15:5451)
1. I don’t know, I like the firewords. I mean, the other magic users use words, why not Ren and Tam? *read section again* I think this scene is OK. It’s a good introduction to Alexa.2. Hmmmmmmmm. I was thinking about that fire scrying. Is Ren doing it then or Tam? Vashkar later seems to think that it’s all Tam. The differences could just be between the sending and receiving ends. Although, you’re right, it is kind of confusing.
3. Whew. certainly not MORE drama!
I think it is a good introduction, it kind of makes a reader curious. Also, that doesn’t necessarily have to be our first hint of the Unknowables. If we’re going to add interaction between the crew members we could slip a few tid bits in. 4. You’re right. that attack was done poorly. although…… :twisted:…….. I like it when people get knocked out……..
just joking………. it really was done poorly.
Ooch. That part where Ren leaves, I never really liked it. I mean, when he escapes, there isn’t even a hint of people searching for him is there? Strange, since, right now, Ren is a very valuable person. Plus, with Ren’s personality and all, I don’t just think he’d take off when everyone else is obviously in trouble. And you’re right that Tam wouldn’t be there when Ren got back. Unless, we could maybe add a part where Mordran sends some men out to try and find Ren, so he leaves, consequently abandoning Tam. However, we would probubly need to add some parts of Ren hiding and have be more cautious about getting back to his allies. Maybe he could even start some kind of diversion to distract Mordran’s guards. That might clear up a few things in the scene. Maybe.55) Yeah. I see what you mean about Scrimage and Letor. First, explaining Scrimage is going to be a pain. and Letor is definately seeming to be more than a common wavespirit. A little much for just one servant. Although, we is the head servant of Vashkar. Does that count for anything? Maybe? Probubly not. *sigh*
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Alice
in July 18th, 2008 @ 16:22Octavio Pye watched as Ren’s eyes closed, and he slipped into oblivion. It was a magic-induced sleep, the Captain knew. He had seen enough of them, having two weatherweavers on his ship. But he had never seen anything like the magic that Ren had just performed. The fire consuming the boy, only to vanish as suddenly as it had come, without even the slightest traces left. No ash, no burns on Ren or Tam-nothing. But then again, he reminded himself. What did he know? He had no elemental talent at all, so who was he to judge whether something was going wrong or not?
He turned his attention back on Tam, who looked exactly as before. Ah well. Unfathomable talent or not, the boys were more than mere tools, and it would do them no good to be soaked in the storm that he felt tingling over the horizon. Pye turned to the hut, in front of which the remainder of the crew of the Sea Roc was standing, awed at the spectacle.
“Let’s get the boys inside,” said Pye. “It looks like it might rain.”
Moments later the rain came down heavy on the roof. Captain Pye and Vushtek crouched over the boys, inspecting Tam’s wound. It was only a physical wound, not a magical wound, thank goodness, so it would heal in time. But in his current state he wasn’t in any shape to tell them exactly what he’d been doing for the past four or five days. Too, bad, really, Pye thought.
[So I guess Ren didn’t manage to heal Tam?]“There is nothing we can do about Tzil,” said Vushtek to Niria. “He is dead.”
“Perhaps,” replied Niria calmly, and the others relaxed. Niria Tolmark was still young, not yet hardened by a life of piracy, and no one was sure how she would take the death of her fellow stormmaster. “It is not Tzil I worry about,” she continued. “It is them.” She jerked her chin toward first Ren, and then Tam, lying on the two hard bunks. “That wasn’t natural, what Ren did.”
“He isn’t natural,” Captain Pye informed her. “Not to us.”
“I suppose not,” she sighed. “I know nothing of fire.”
This conversation was interrupted by the arrival of a smug-looking Mordran, who bowed smoothly and said, “I have decided to let you go free.”
There was a stunned and mistrustful silence, and then Pye said, “And the boys?”
“The boys as well. Your ship is in the harbor still; she is unharmed. Now go.”
They did not have to be told twice.Hours later, after everybody but Tam and he had left the cabin where they now lay, Ren shifted restlessly in his sleep. His dreams were uneasy. He kept seeing a fire, burning, burning, burning his skin, burning away his strength. He tried as hard as he could, but he couldn’t scream.
Then, right before the flames consumed him, the vision changed. Ren suddenly found himself sitting on a cold floor in what looked a lot like a dungeon. On impulse, he tried to stand, but quickly realized that he was held down by shadow-like chains.
“No!” A scream filled the room.
Ren looked up abruptly and saw Tam rolling around in agony on the damp dungeon floor.
“What have I done to you?! Why do I deserve such agony?! Please! No!” Tam screamed again.
“Tam!” Ren yelled. “Stop it!”
The other boy shuddered and ceased his thrashing. Ren sat there for what felt like hours, watching Tam sleep. He kept trying to tell himself that this was all a dream, but the longer he remained in the dark room his doubts continued to grow.
Tam stirred. A yawn escaped his lips and he sat up.
“Where . . . where are we?” Tam asked.
“You,” answered a sinister voice,” are in my mind cells. Nice, aren’t they?”
Mordran strode confidently into the room.
“This entire facility, including myself, is an illusion, it only takes place in your mind, but it is very effective as a prison.”
The two boys gazed at Mordran, clearly uncomprehending.
Mordran smiled nastily in return. ” You will remain here until you give me what I want: your allegiance.”
With that, Mordran stalked away, fading as he walked. The faint stench of rot lingered in the room.
Tam’s eyes widened in panic. “What are we going to do?” he gasped.
“I don’t want to be his servant!” Ren added. He glanced around the small room, if you could even call it a room. Was it just his imagination, or was it growing more revolting? The rotting smell that he had noticed came from the rotting flesh of a body in the chamber that surely had no been there a minute ago, and the smell was growing stronger.
“I already agreed to work the Orb,” said Tam desperately. “I’ll do anything, if I could just get out of here!” Tam seemed to be immobile, staring into space at something invisible. “I don’t want to die! I don’t want anybody to die while he tries to get to me!”
“Tam, that’s very noble, but think of all the people that would die if he was able to use the Orb!”
“I don’t care!” Tam’s face had grown very white, and his hands were making the chains shake.
The noise only added to Ren’s growing sense of claustrophobia and despair. He wanted to stop the noise, stop the smell, stop everything but his own mind, and think. He reached out to slap the older boy, but his own chains would not allow it. The smell was becoming a thick, impenetrable fog, and Tam moaned on. Finally Ren snapped. “SHUT UP!” he yelled. “Let me think!”
“Oh no, dear boy. You cannot think here,” said Mordran’s voice from somewhere inside the depths of the room – his own mind, Ren realized. He felt betrayed. How could his own mind have come up with something so awful? But of course it hadn’t. This was Mordran’s invention, and Ren could do nothing but watch.
So watch he did. He watched Tam grow more and more frightened, more and more willing to serve Mordran in exchange for release from this prison, and he watched the chains crumble until finally they gave way all together and Tam fainted.
“There,” said Mordran, entering the room again. “Perfect. Now, my dear boy, you shall be all alone.” As Ren watched, Tam’s inert form faded until nothing was left.
“Is-is he dead?” Ren asked.
“Oh no, not dead,” said Mordran. “He is my servant, and will work the Orb until he does die, and an unpleasant death it will be, too. But he hasn’t any choice. Neither have you. No one can endure this for long, and in the end everyone gives up. Or,” he added, motioning to the rotting carcass, “you end up like him.”
[I never liked the mind cells myself, but that is purely a matter2 3 (get off the keyboard, Apollo!) of opinion.]Captain Pye sat awkwardly on a small chair in his cabin, staring blindly at his paperwork. Across from him in the bunk lay his unconscious cabin boy and powder monkey. He sighed and put his head in his hands. The pair of boys had been in asleep for weeks.
Suddenly, there was a rustling in the sheets. One of the boys turned and sat up in bed. It was Tam. Captain Pye gasped in surprise and grabbed Tam’s shoulders.
“What’s going on boy? Why isn’t Ren awake?”
Tam’s eyes seemed to flash a slight red color, but immediately returned back to normal. Captain Pye blinked; perhaps he had imagined it.
“What? Ren?” Tam asked innocently. “What a sleepy head! He’s still in bed?”
“Yes.” Captain replied stonily “You and him have been sleeping for weeks now.”
“Ren’s problems are no concern of mine.” Tam said with only a fleeting look of guilt. “Now, please excuse me, I wish to get out of this room.”
Tam pushed the Captain roughly out of the way and strode purposefully out to the deck. By now, Pye had begun to suspect something. He watched Tam walk toward one of the rowboats on the far side of the ship.
Captain Pye’s eyes grew wide and he shouted, “Stop him!”
The crew instantly stopped what they were doing. The men closest to Tam tried to grab him, but Tam was quicker. Muttering a word under his breath, his arms caught flame and he rose into the air. Without a word, he landed on a small boat. With a wave of his hand the ropes securing the vehicle burned away. The rowboat wobbled and fell into the water. The crew watched as Tam rowed furiously away. Captain Pye stared after the boys receding figure with worry. Tam’s condition could only mean one thing: Ren was in trouble!Niria stared her captain in concern. “Are you sure, Captain?” she asked carefully.
Pye nodded sharply. “The Shriak Mind Bonding is the only way that I can communicate with Ren. We cannot let Mordran take Ren as he so obviously did Tam. Letting this happen would be disastrous to the whole world as we know it.”
“But sir!” Niria protested. “The Bonding is an extremely ancient process! We do not even know if it works! It could very well backfire and kill you!”
Pye shook his head and chuckled. “Then, you can have my hat.”
Niria sighed. She had tried to warn him.Ren lay on the cold dungeon floor, miserable. He wished that he could strangle Tam. At least before he had someone to talk to, even if he wouldn’t talk back.
“If I get out of here, I will personally make Tam wish he had never been born,” he vowed.
It was only then that he realized that he had been talking aloud. Great, he thought, now I’m talking to myself. I’m going crazy.
Suddenly, something touched his thoughts. Ren was instantly alert. Who was it? Had Mordran decided to resort to some less passive form of torture? No! He wouldn’t let Mordran win! With as much savagery as he could muster, he attacked the strand of thought.Niria watched Captain Pye as he concentrated. A look of satisfaction told her that he had succeeded with making contact with Ren. Niria let go of the breath that she had been holding since the beginning of the Bonding process. It had worked!
A sharp intake of breath told her something was wrong. Captain Pye was kneeling on the floor, holding his head in agony, his mouth open a silent scream. Niria rushed to his side, but there was nothing she could do. Captain Pye’s veins stuck out on his neck, which was red and covered with sweat. His eyes bugged out of his head. The strain was too much for him. He collapsed in a dead faint.
A moan came out of the far corner of the room. Niria looked up and saw Ren sitting up in bed, his eyes wide in alarm.
“Niria?” Ren questioned in disbelief.
“Ren!” Niria gasped. “Get Vushtek! Now! Quick-”
Ren nodded and jumped out of bed. He didn’t know what was going on, but he did know where to find Vushtek. He ran to the galley as fast as he could.
“Vushtek!” he called into the open doorway. “The Captain-” Vushtek appeared in the door in a twinkling, wearing a grubby white apron over his emerald green robes.
“What about him?” he asked, concern etched on his face.
“I don’t know! Something’s wrong!”
Vushtek needed no more explanation than that. He did not bother to take off his apron, but headed towards the cabin right away. Ren followed rather uncertainly.
Vushtek entered the cabin and stopped in his tracks when he saw the Captain. “What happened?” he demanded of Niria.
“He – he tried to do the Shriak Mind Bonding. And it went wrong,” Niria stammered, her pretty face distraught.
“He tried to do the Bonding? And you let him? Of course it went wrong! It’s the Bonding!” He knelt by the unconscious captain, and started to take his pulse. “I’m not one to criticize my captain,” he said, “but this is ridiculous.”
Niria nodded. “And he said – he said that if he died, I could have his hat!” This was too much for her, and she started to sob uncontrollably.
Ren looked on, hardly hearing a word, as Vushtek, in an unusually bad temper, questioned Niria, who continued to cry. But then something brought him back down to earth.
“It wasn’t during the Bonding that it all went wrong,” said Niria, gaining some measure of control. “It was after, once he’d actually reached Ren and it ought to have been easy.”
Ren turned cold. He cleared his throat. “What exactly does this Bonding do?” he asked, his voice perilously close to cracking.
Vushtek and Niria turned to look at him. “It gives two people contact through their minds,” Niria explained. “Didn’t you feel it?”
But Ren could not reply.
“Oh no,” he murmured. “Oh no, oh no, oh please no.”
“Ren?” asked Niria, comprehension dawning in her eyes. “What did you do?”
“I didn’t . . . mean . . .” began Ren through a fog of horror. “I thought it was Mordran . . . trying to get into my mind . . .”
Niria eyes grew as big as saucers. Vushtek stared at Ren as if he wanted to pierce his brain.
“You attacked his mind,” Vushtek stated calmly.
The large man turned to the Captain and felt his pulse once more.
“He’s not dead, but near it. I may be able to soothe the pain slightly, but he needs to get expert help. We will need to stop at the nearest port as quickly as possible if he is to survive.”
Vushtek grunted and lifted Captain Pye gently onto a bed. He motioned for Niria and Ren to leave them in peace. Niria brushed past Ren as they left, she didn’t meet his eyes.
[Meh. No me gusta. They’re in a cabin again.
I think this scene should be very different, but I’m not sure how. Maybe not in a cabin, and I don’t really like how Pye is portrayed in this one. or the next one. Actually, from about here until the Blood Storm battle, I really dislike the characters. (Although Pye gets better as soon as he’s a prisoner. He just gets weird here.]Ren stared hollowly at nothing. He did not feel the deck rolling beneath his feet, or the wind on his face, or hear the men working behind him. He did, however, notice when someone appeared at his elbow and asked, “What’s going on? No one’ll tell me.”
Ren turned and met the eyes of the cabin boy, Arn. “Oh, hello,” he said, deadpan. The other boy looked alarmed.
“What’s going on?” he asked again.
Ren looked back out across the stern of the ship, at the great blue-green watery expanse. “Go ask someone else,” he said. “Leave me alone.”
“No,” replied the cabin boy stubbornly. He was much larger than Ren, and smaller boys would not dare refuse such a large and ferocious-looking person. Ren did not spare him a glance, nor say another word.
Arn waited, leaning his arms on a bulwark. Ren would give in and say sooner or later. He could wait.
He did not have to wait long. In a few minutes, Ren spoke.
“I think I may have – I might have . . . killed . . . the Captain.”
Arn looked at him in mingled astonishment and anger. “Why in Sphaere?” he exploded. “What did he do to you?”
“Nothing at all,” Ren said. “I didn’t mean to. He tried to get inside my mind. Don’t ask. Please leave me alone.”
“The Captain is dead?” Arn asked, his fury giving way to incredulity.
“No,” said Ren. “Not yet. Hopefully never. But he might die. If he did it would be all my fault. Go away. Don’t tell anyone, please.”
Arn stared at Ren curiously, but did as he was asked.Tam had no idea where he going. In fact, if he had been in his right mind, he would not have left the Sea Roc at all. There seemed to be a buzzing in his head, telling him where to go.
Tam looked around himself. He saw no evidence that he going anywhere near land. Everything was ocean, as far as his eyes could see. He wondered silently if he was doing the right thing.
He thought about Ren. Ren seemed so certain about what he should do, when he, Tam, had no idea what was right. Guilt filled him as he remembered that Ren was still trapped in the dark mind cell. Tam couldn’t believe that Ren would ever surrender. He imagined Ren staying trapped in his mind, until he died, leaving his rotting corpse to lay there forever.
The buzzing filled Tam’s head again and he shook the thoughts of Ren out of his mind. Ren was a fool to not give his services to the empire. If he didn’t use his powers for the greater good then he deserved his fate.Ren stood silently on the deck of The Sea Roc, looking out over the small port town where they had docked. A numb feeling was quickly rushing up inside him. It was the worst sensation he had ever experienced.
Hushed voices drifted toward him from the captain’s cabin. Out of corner of his eye, he watched a small, frail man making frantic hand gestures to Vushtek. The large man nodded and left the older gentleman alone with Captain Pye’s still form.
Ren heard soft footfalls behind him and felt a rather large hand rest on his shoulder. It was Vushtek.
“The doctor is starting the procedure,” he said. “The Captain should survive.”
Ren gave a stiff nod and Vushtek turned away. No one seemed eager to stay in his company. After all, hadn’t it been he, Ren, who had attacked the Captain and practically killed him?Tam stared at the sky, brooding. His mind kept telling him to keep rowing onward, but his mouth was parched and his stomach had been empty for days. He lowered his eyes and looked desperately into the distance. His eyes grew wide and he jumped up in excitement. The boat wobbled dangerously, so he sat back down. With a sudden burst of energy, Tam began rowing again with vigor. Land was in sight!
The ship was silent and Ren felt horribly conspicuous. He continued to stare woodenly at the port in front of him. Jartuvi, his mind told him. The third Free Isle you’ve seen. But he didn’t care. It was simply another thing to stare at, unseeing. He was such an idiot. He ought to have known better than to attack someone’s mind, after Alexis. But he had done so anyway.
Somewhere that seemed a world away, Niria started to cry.
It was all too much for Ren, and without a second thought, he slipped over the side of the ship and plunged into the water.
It was greasy, and dark, and made his clothes stick to his skin, but he rose to the surface anyway, spit out a mouthful of the foul harbor-water, and started to swim doggedly toward shore.
He was almost there when he felt something touch his mind. His first instinct was to defend himself, but he stifled that and went under with surprise.
When he came back up to the surface again, he saw an amused-looking blue Pukis hovering above him.
“Alexis!” he gasped out loud, going under again.
Of course, she replied. I wasn’t going to abandon you. She regarded him for a moment and then said, On second thought, why don’t we just talk when we get to shore.
Ren nodded in agreement and swam the remaining strokes to the harbor wall. Once there, he pulled himself up onto it and looked back towards the Sea Roc. No one was looking for him. No one had noticed his splash. He wasn’t sure whether to be glad or desolate. He settled on simply pushing the thought out of his mind.
Come on, said Alexis. We should go somewhere where there aren’t quite as many people.
Ren nodded in agreement. Where?
I know a place. Come on. With that she turned into a kitten and trotted off towards what appeared to be a completely abandoned shack. Ren followed with a little trepidation.
Where are your children? he asked.
They went back to Lithuslov. It has been several weeks, you know. This last was said with a touch of amusement, but Ren remembered the mind cells and could find nothing even remotely funny.On the Sea Roc, things were much as Ren had imagined them. The Captain was still asleep, the doctor was getting into his rowing boat, and Niria was still sobbing from the emotional stress of the last few days. By now the last few days had morphed into the last few weeks, and she was crying for Tzil and the dead crewmembers as well as the Captain.
But someone had noted the splash. Perched high on the crosstrees was a monkey, carefully watching the scene below.
When the doctor had rowed off towards the shore, Vushtek turned to Niria. “Would you like to stand guard over the Captain?” he asked kindly. “I’ll make you some tea if you’d like.”
Niria nodded mutely, wiped her eyes, and went into the cabin. Vushtek disappeared into the galley. No one mentioned a splash, or noticed that Ren was missing. The monkey-that-was-not-a-monkey smiled an eerie grin, turned into a wind-beetle, and flew off to the other side of the Isle. Its master would be pleased with it.The deck of the Blood Storm was empty, except for one man. Rake Vashkar smiled thinly, projecting his thoughts through the rippling spray, calling back his servants.
A wind beetle landed on the deck in front of him. Fluttering its delicate, blue-patterned wings, it slowly dissolved into a puddle of salt water.
With frightening speed, a cloaked man grew out of the puddle like a rising pillar. “The Fiery One is no longer aboard the Sea Roc,” it hissed. “He will be easy to find and capture.”
“Go. Take your brethren and bring him to me. I will send word to Mordran.”
Vashkar’s smile grew into a grin. Ren’s will would be easy to break, and with two Fire Powerful on his side, Mordran would easily be able to wipe out every freebooter in the Inner Sea. His faithful stormmaster would certainly receive a sizable percentage of the enormous reward that Sanguinus IX would give him.
Of course, if Vashkar had known the full scope of Mordran’s plan, he would have jumped over the side and raced to warn the Emperor before it was too late.Ren followed Alexis along the beach. After walking for several minutes, they arrived at a small clump of trees away from the city. Alexis curled up under one of the trees, so Ren followed suit.
So, Alexis said with an amused glimmer in her eye. What has my human been getting up to while I’ve been gone?
Ren related his story to Alexis gratefully. He had needed to talk to someone for a long time.
Well, you’ve certainly had a time without me haven’t you? she commented with an amused purr. Don’t worry about Captain Pye. He has a strong mind; you have not broken it.
Ren nodded but worry was still etched across his face. Alexis looked like she wanted to say something more but she was interrupted by a crunch of wood grounding against rock and a boyish whoop. The friends peered though the foliage and glimpsed a young man with scraggly hair and a hungry look in his eyes. The boy left his vehicle behind and began hiking toward the city.
Ren crept cautiously toward the abandoned rowboat and peered inside. It was totally empty except for a small sign carved into the back. Ren stared at it and immediately recognized it as the signature of The Sea Roc. With alarm, Ren turned from the boat and watched the boy’s disappearing figure. Tam!
He almost yelled after him to come back, he had so much to talk about, but he remembered in time Tam’s treachery and was silent.
Well, what are you going to do about it? asked Alexis, reading his tumbled thoughts.
“I don’t know, he replied aloud, sounding suddenly both very young and very unhappy. “Should I follow him?”
She replied with another question. Does the crew of the Sea Roc know where you have gone?
“No. But they don’t care anyhow. I nearly killed the Captain, they can’t ever forgive me.”
I wouldn’t be so sure about that. I strongly suggest that you return before they start to worry.
“Fine.” Ren turned and trudged back towards the harbor, with Alexis sitting contentedly on his shoulder. A small brown wren detached itself from a twig and flapped off in the direction of the Blood Storm.
Ren was halfway back to the Sea Roc when it struck him that he had no way to get across the harbor save by swimming or going back to get the boat. The next thing that struck him was a large stick against the back of his head.
The impact knocked him face first onto the path, and when he rolled over onto his back, still clutching his head with his ears ringing, he saw a tall cloaked man with watery eyes looking down on him. The man raised his stick for another blow-
And Alexis flew into his face, a small, hissing ball of fire, fur, and scales. The man looked taken aback, but he said a word and a moment later Alexis fell to the sand, dripping with water and steaming slightly. Ren dove forward to grab her before the man could do any more harm, but the Pukis spit a tiny ball of flame that scorched Ren’s hand and lit the man’s robes on fire. A single word appeared in Ren’s mind, etched on the back of his eyelids in blazing letters, and that word was,
RUN!
He did. He ran back along the beach towards the town, away from the rowboat, (away from Alexis!), knowing that he had to get back to the Sea Roc. He had to warn them, and he had to get to safety. There was not the slightest doubt in the boy’s mind about what the man was – who the man was. He had seen the scar above his right eyebrow.
Who had let Letor out, Sphaere knew. But he certainly was no longer a prisoner.
[I don’t like that Letor keeps coming back. This can just be another wave spirit, I think.]Tam wandered aimlessly through the streets of Jartuvi. He was looking for something or someone, but he had no idea who. Tam found himself walking inside a small side tavern. He headed straight for the barman.
The barman took one look at him and said, “Oh, his grace told me I would be expecting someone like you.” He reached under the table and produced a grubby little key. “Your room’s up the stairs on the right.” he said gruffly and turned to a waiting customer.
Tam stumbled up the stairs and managed to open the door to his room before collapsing on the bed.Ren couldn’t remember a time where he’d run faster in his life, not counting the time when he had run from the emperors guards. That day seemed ages ago.
Ren picked up even more speed as the docks came into sight. He dived into the water and swam toward The Sea Roc. With the last strength he could muster, he clambered up a rope ladder that some careless man had left hanging over the side and hoisted himself onto the ship’s deck. One of the crew noticed his sudden appearance and helped him to his feet. Ren stumbled over to Vushtek and related what happened, breathlessly.
Vushtek stared at him with growing alarm on his face.
“We can’t possibly leave the city with the Captain in the condition he’s in. We can only hope that Letor does not send us into the hands of the enemy, but trust me, if he does, we certainly won’t be taken without a fight!”
That was very comforting, Ren decided sarcastically, lying on a bunk an hour later. He didn’t want to be taken at all, with or without a fight!
Niria looked in. “Oh, you’re here,” she said, her voice heavy with anger and sorrow.
“Yes,” he said dully. Life had gone from bad to worse in the space of an instant.
“This is the stormmaster’s cabin,” said Niria, with a touch of accusation.
“The first mate put me here,” said Ren. “There was nowhere else.”
Niria’s expression made it clear that she disapproved, but there was nothing she could say or do about it.
“Well,” she said. “I am the stormmaster, since Tzil is dead. I will have to collect the necessary equipment. Don’t mind me.” And she busied herself with gathering up the instruments that littered the tiny cabin. Tzil certainly hadn’t been very tidy.
Ren turned his face to the wall.
[A) cabin, B) he doesn’t need a rope ladder. Some ships have ladders built into the side.]Personally, I want to rewrite practically everything from the beginning of this post to the end of the book, but not everyone will agree with me.
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Alice
in July 18th, 2008 @ 16:36Tam lay in a half-awake stupor on the bed, until the smell of soup brought him to his senses. He sat up eagerly. The little child who had brought the soup bowed solemnly to him and left.
When he had finished he lay back down, ready to sleep for days if necessary. The time spent in the mind cells had been anything but refreshing, and now he was ready for some proper sleep.
But he was not to have it. The door opened and in walked Mordran, looking as benign as when Tam had first seen him. Behind the little man stood another, much taller, his hair a lurid and conspicuous violet. Rake Vashkar.
Mordran sat fluidly into one of the small, hard chairs that stood by the door. Vashkar did not sit in the chair beside Mordran’s, but Tam did not expect him to anyway. He didn’t think that Vashkar was the kind of person who was often seen in a chair.
Mordran had a calm, dangerous expression on his face.
“Do you have any idea how much you have damaged my plans?” he asked angrily. “You were seen on your way here. We would have captured a dangerous batch of pirates, along with that treacherous boy, Ren, if you had been more careful. Now we have lost our element of surprise. We have to risk open combat.”
Tam’s eyes grew wide in amazement. “Ren’s alive?” he asked in awe.
Mordran’s eyes flashed mercilessly. “Ren is no concern of yours.”
With that, he got up from his chair and headed toward the door. “You will be punished for your mistake.” He motioned to Vashkar and left.
Rake Vashkar grinned and cracked his knuckles. Tam’s face bore a look of pure horror.
“So, you thought you would make things better by running, did you?” Vashkar said in a tone that made it sound like he was talking about the weather.
“No, I-” Tam stammered.
Vashkar hit him on the side of the head, in a sudden burst of violence. “Don’t lie!” he hissed, spitting in Tam’s face. “We know everything that you’ve been doing since you left our presence last. Did you think we would let you wander around unchecked?”
“But I- I’ve come to help you,” Tam said feebly, recoiling.
“And this is the sort of help you’re going to offer? Revealing our general location to the one of the few people that would use that information to hurt us? A lot of help you are!”
He circled Tam, who cowered in the center of the tiny room, trying not to show his fear and failing miserably.
“If it wasn’t for Mordran’s orders,” he whispered hungrily. “I’d have more than half a mind to kill you, right now.”
Vashkar nodded silently to himself. Then he turned back to Tam again and said, “But I won’t. Instead, I will have to satisfy myself with giving you your first lesson in what happens to the servants of Mordran that fail him.”
Vashkar reached into his belt and pulled out a rather nasty knife. With a wicked grin, he grabbed Tam’s arm roughly and held it down. Tam struggled but he couldn’t get free. Vashkar grunted and swung the weapon with expertise. When he let go of Tam’s arm, Tam stared at his hand in disbelief. It was only when Vashkar had calmly left the room that Tam started to scream. A pitiful stump was all that was left of his right pinkie finger.
Who knows how long he sat there, staring at it, tears streaming down his face and blood pooling on the carpet? After what seemed ten years the door opened. The little girl who had brought him the soup looked in.
She made a small noise of disapproval when she saw what had happened, and the small pool of blood on the floor, but she did not seem surprised. She looked sympathetically at Tam, and then disappeared.
Half an hour later, the girl returned, and she brought a man with her. She pointed to Tam and ran from the room, pulling the door shut behind her.
The doctor did not look very qualified to be a doctor. His hair was disheveled and he was older than Tam’s great-grandfather. His clothes were not very clean, and there was no reason to suspect that his bandages were any cleaner. He looked at the blood, looked at Tam, and muttered something that sounded like, “Sailors.”
He crossed the room, picked up a pitcher of water, and dumped it over Tam’s hand in what Tam could only interpret as an attempt to clean the wound, or, more likely, to make the boy stop crying, because what actually happened was that Tam got absolutely soaking wet, and the room was suddenly awash with water.
The man disregarded this, and pulled from his coat pocket a roll of bandages, which he wrapped around Tam’s poor hand until it was almost as big as the boy’s head.
“There,” he muttered, while Tam sat on the wet floor, still in shock. “That’ll be four gold pieces.”
Tam stared at his hand stupidly. He looked up at the man with a look of confusion on his face.
“Four gold pieces,” the old man repeated slowly.
“I don’t have any gold.” Tam said dully.
The man stared at the boy with growing anger on his face. “You filthy brat! That was the last of my best medical bandages!”
Tam swallowed the observation that they had not looked like medical bandages. “Sorry,” he muttered.
The doctor’s face grew very red and suddenly he lunged at Tam, who tried to get away from the man but was instead tackled and held to the ground. The doctor savagely tried to rip the bloody bandages off Tam’s hand. Anger surged through Tam and a word phrase came to his mind. “Flamula Infenso Pilus”
Instantly, the doctor’s hair was ablaze. The man screamed in terror and ran from the room.
Tam looked cautiously at his hand. It was not damaged; the bandage was only slightly ripped. A few angry shouts were heard down the hall and Tam had a feeling that he wouldn’t be wanted anymore in the tavern. Without a backward glance, Tam went out the back door of the building and into the streets.
[This is poorly written, and then there’s the matter of the fire word. Tam has never used fire words. I think we should take them all out, but then again, maybe not.]
He ran, his hand throbbing faintly and words of power tumbling through his mind. It was all he could do, in the face of the pain and fear and hatred – such definite feelings, and welcome as respite from the constant uncertainty – not to yell them out, to burn the town to the ground, and himself with it. Something was wrong, something had happened, and Tam, in this strange confident state, could not see it. His feet carried him closer to the harbor, where he knew he would find the Sea Roc, and Captain Pye, and Ren, and the rest of the crew. And he would be safe there, safe from – there was a surge of pain through his hand, and a surge of realization through his mind. Them, he thought, and then the remains of rebellion and confidence drained away, leaving nothing but guilt and a deep, nagging, fear that something had gone wrong and it was all his fault. They were manipulating him still. Would he ever be free?
[More reference to the Unknowables.]Ren was awakened from his much-needed nap by a noise that at first, in his sleep-befuddled state, he could not identify. “Mmmm,” he mumbled. “Mustadozedoffsorry.” When the noise persisted, he said, louder and with more clarity, “I’m getting up. You don’t have to set off cannon in my ears.” With this half-asleep realization, Ren sat bolt upright and wide awake. “Cannon!” he gasped, horrified. “Oh no!” With a blatant disregard for the various stormmaster’s implements still scattered throughout the cabin, he rushed onto the deck.
It was not cannon, only muskets, and that was bad enough. A badly aimed musket ball whizzed past his cheek as he stepped onto the deck. He coughed at the harsh acrid smell of alchemical powder, and stood there blinking in the bright afternoon sun.
“Idiot!” hissed the first mate from Ren’s right, where he sat crouched beneath a bulwark. “Get down!”
Ren did as he was told, and scooted across the deck on his stomach. “What’s going on?” he asked the first mate.
“The harbor patrol had the brilliant idea to attack the pirates with muskets! I don’t know what put it into their heads, but there must be some reason. They usually leave us alone, since pirates make up the majority of the people who actually come to the Free Isles.”
“Oh,” said Ren, sighing with relief. He had been sure that it was the Empire, for a moment or two. Not that the harbor patrol was that much better.
The first mate continued. “I want you to go to the Captain’s cabin. Niria and the cabin boy are already there.”
Ren opened his mouth to protest at being shoved out of the way, but remembered that the first mate was in charge, and almost surrendered. He remembered his own status in time. “But sir-” he said. “I’m the powder monkey. Oughtn’t I to be doing something?”
The first mate shook his head angrily. “Powder monkey, indeed. You don’t still believe that, do you? You’re just in the way. Now GO!”
Ren obeyed without another word.
“Oh, it’s you,” said Niria coldly when Ren entered the room. She was sitting in a chair by Captain Pye’s bed, her face hard but her eyes frightened. When she saw Ren she turned away, a gesture that cut Ren to the quick. The sounds of the battle grew louder. They must have begun using cannon as well.
“Yes,” he mumbled. “Me.”
Arn leaped up from where he was sitting on the floor, and ran over to the other boy. “What’s going on?” he asked. “Who’s shooting at us? Why aren’t we allowed to help?”
“The harbor patrol,” explained Ren. “Supposedly we’re too young and would just get in the way.”
Arn’s expression grew dark, like a thunderstorm over the sea, and he, too, turned away from Ren. “The Captain would have let us help,” he muttered.
Ren had never felt worse.
But he didn’t have much time to feel bad, because there was suddenly a crunching sound from above, and someone yelled, and then the cabin door burst inward.
For a moment or two nothing more happened. No threatening figure strode through the gap, and the sound of fighting disappeared altogether. Ren, Niria, and Arn exchanged glances. Then Arn crossed the floor in one bound and leaped through the open door. With a guilty look at Niria, Ren followed.
The deck was a horrible mess. The mast had come down and nearly crushed a sailor. The deck was awash with blood and water, and not one of the crew of the Sea Roc was to be seen.
“Oh my,” said a faint voice from behind them. Niria had followed them onto the deck, and was staring with wide eyes at the carnage.
“No one’s left,” said Ren hollowly.
“That’s not true,” said a firm voice from the galley. “There are a lot of people left, but most of them are injured.”
“Vushtek!” cried Arn. “You’re still alive!”
“Yes,” said Vushtek gravely. “But you should leave now.”
“Why leave?” Niria asked. “It’s over, and you’ll need help.”
“It’s not over,” said Vushtek. “That wasn’t the harbor patrol, and they aren’t gone. I can’t leave the injured like this, but we can’t take chances.” At this he looked straight at Ren, and Ren wondered exactly how much the alchooktor knew. “Niria, you will take the boys to the city, and stay there.” Niria nodded mutely.
“Then go,” Vushtek said.
The three escapees crept carefully across the carnage on the vast deck of the Sea Roc. They made it to the bow of the ship with little difficulty and peered over the side. A line of soldiers stood on the dock in front of them. Each soldier was dressed smartly in a black uniform with a shiny badge on his chest. Ren watched them with growing unease. The faces of the men were so cold and emotionless that they seemed unreal.
Niria motioned impatiently for him to follow her lead and he turned to watch what she was doing. With unimaginable stealth, Niria slid under the ship’s railing and onto the side. Using handholds that were invisible to Ren, she climbed down into the water with not even a slight splash. Arn was already in the water, waiting for her. The two stared at Ren expectantly and he wondered what in the world he was going to do.
With a sigh, Ren braced himself and lowered himself clumsily over the side of the Sea Roc. His muscles strained as he searched frantically for a foothold. Finding none, he looked desperately over his shoulder. Niria and Arn were looking up at him in alarm. Ren scanned the side of the ship for a place that would assist him in his climb and saw a slight protrusion in one of the panels covering the ship to his right. Just as Ren rested his weight on the plank, the whole ship shuddered. Ren’s hands were violently thrown away from their hold and he fell with a loud splash into the harbor.
The trio watched in horror as the soldiers who had been standing silently moments before went into action. The attack on the Sea Roc had resumed! Niria determinedly tore her gaze away from the scene and motioned for everyone to swim away from the battle.Among all of the harbor patrol, no one noticed the three escapees except one lone monkey. It wore a grave expression on its face, even for a primate, as it bounded away to report to its master.
Vushtek stood guard determinedly over Captain Pye. The battle was not doing well for the crew. They were quickly losing the few men they had left. It would be only a matter of time before the ship was breached. Vushtek breathed slightly easier knowing that Niria and the others had escaped. At least Niria was safe.
There was a groan from the Captain’s bed and Vushtek ran to his side, alarmed. Captain Pye smiled weakly and patted Vushtek’s large scarred hand.
“Are they gone?” Pye asked.
Vushtek nodded slowly. He knew that Captain Pye was attached to the boy Ren, even though it had been the boy that had left him in this sickly state.
The Captain smiled painfully and relaxed. Vushtek returned to his post at the Captain’s cabin door.
Outside, things were not going well. The dwindling amount of men was turning disastrous. Vushtek braced himself as the several patrol men climbed aboard the Sea Roc. The men were immediately taken down by some of the remaining crew, but even more of the harbor patrol took the place of the dead. It wasn’t long before the entire deck was covered with fighting men.
Over the entire melee, Vushtek’s eyes only saw one man. The man wasn’t hard to miss because of his bright violet hair. He held his muscular body in a commanding way as he strode toward Vushtek. This man would NOT hurt Captain Pye. Vushtek’s eyes gleamed with the light of battle as he shouldered his axe. He had been around weaponry all his life. He didn’t even need to glance at his belt to know that his collection of butcher knives where hanging at his side.
The violet haired man noticed Vushtek’s reaction and drew his sword. With a yell, Vushtek lunged forward and butted the man in the face with the head of his axe. Blood streamed from the man’s broken nose and he slashed Vushtek’s shoulder in his anger. The attack continued furiously. The man kept trying to trick Vushtek into turning his back to the door of to the Captain’s cabin, but Vushtek kept defying him, much to the man’s anger.
Vushtek had been so preoccupied with the battle that he hadn’t noticed that the ship had become strangely quiet. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the remaining harbor patrol standing to attention on the deck. All of the other pirates were either dead or captured and tied to the mast. Vushtek’s attacks were now filled with the strength of desperation.
Suddenly, a powerful force hit him from behind and he fell to the ground. His hands were instantly bound by a clear, water-like rope. Vushtek chanced a look behind him and saw a man in a long dark cloak. He seemed to flow as he walked toward the violet haired man.
Vushtek’s eyes grew wide with recognition. The cloaked man stopped and kneeled at the feet of the man Vushtek had been fighting moments before.
“Master,” he said in a gurgly whisper. “The Fiery One has escaped with two others. They are headed toward the town.”
The violet haired man glanced at his servant, alarmed. He strode past Vushtek into the cabin but came back shortly with a scowl on his face.
“It’s just the captain! You are right my faithful servant, this battle has been for nothing. The boy is gone.”
“You are a fool Vashkar!” Vushtek yelled up at his captor. “Do you seriously think that Mordran will give you all the you desire? You are but a puppet in his hands, that he can dispose of whenever he wants!”
Vashkar looked down at Vushtek with disgust on his face. He turned to one of his commanders and said, “Take a force down to the village. Three crewmen have escaped the ship. One of them is a boy who goes by the name of Ren Splayr. Capture this boy alive and bring him to me. Kill the others.”
Vushtek’s eyes grew wide with anger. With a yell, he lunged at Vashkar, but the wave spirit was quicker. Vushtek had no chance. He fell face down on the deck of the Sea Roc, his eyes empty in death.
[This entire thing needs rewriting. Well, some of the battle is pretty good (a lot of it, actually), but the beginning is terrible.]
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 18th, 2008 @ 21:3759)
1. Arg. I didn’t notice that either! Tam definately should not be wounded after all of that! Ren should have at least given him something!2. I like the mind cells. (erm, of course, I’m biased) But I don’t like how Mordran is shown in much of it. I don’t know. I just don’t like all the “dear boys”. It’s all slightly, erm, I don’t even know how to describe it.
3. Gurgle. Well, I would say that they wouldn’t be in a cabin, they would be in the presense of the ship’s doctor. Is there a ship’s doctor? There should be if there isn’t already. Anyway, the doctor would most likely be the one to greet Tam as he awakens. Perhaps Captain Pye gets involved when the doctor tries to get Tam to go see him.
*reads again*
Well, Vushtek seems kind of doctory. Is that fit for his character? Is he a doctor? I don’t really know. It would probubly work though and would give Vushtek character.The only problem with our realization that Captain Pye shouldn’t be so open with the crew is that we may end up losing Captain Pye’s character, which wouldn’t be good. I hope we can pull all of this off. *is worried*
4. Erm. Rewriting all past that point would be kind of extreme don’t you think. It’s not THAT terrible. Parts of it are good!
Well, tis time for bed! Good night everyone! It’s way past my bed time!
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Alice
in July 18th, 2008 @ 21:4361-
1) Yes.
2) Yeah, my problem with the mind cells probably has more to do with Mordran than the cells themselves. And the weirdness that happens as soon as they get out of them.
3.1) Vushtek is the doctor. And the cook. And the alchemist. He’s the alchooktor. And yes, I like that idea.
3.2) I don’t think we need to have Pye’s character vanish simply because he isn’t the sole adviser. I’m sure we can pull it off.
4) Well, not rewriting all of it! But lots.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 19th, 2008 @ 08:05Ohhhhhh! So that’s what an alchooktor is! I’ve never been able to figure that out!
Hmmmmmm. we could probubly do it. Although, we might end up having to add a few new scenes with Captain Pye to replace some of the ones we take out. Perhaps with him doing captainy things, like, ordering people around, planning battles, and setting the course of the Searoc!
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Alice
in July 19th, 2008 @ 11:3463- Exactly.
Here, I’m going to finish my little commentary and then we can start.
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Alice
in July 19th, 2008 @ 12:16It felt good to be on a ship again, although a month ago he would have never admitted it. Ren grinned at Arn, who was swabbing the deck beside him. Arn returned his grin and continued working with renewed vigor.
The two had almost finished when a shadow stretched across the deck. The shadow belonged to the captain, whose name was known as Sharpnose, due to his rather large nose. Niria stood nervously behind him. Apparently this was important, because Niria was hardly ever allowed to leave her post as waveworker.
The captain motioned for them to follow him and he strode off across the ship. “New circumstances have developed on this ship,†he explained. “We have recently gotten a prisoner on board. He claims that he used to be a crewman on the “Sea Rocâ€.
Niria, Ren and Arn all seemed to stop walking at the same time. They stared at Sharpnose as if he had just muttered a death sentence, then they ran full speed to the brig. They threw open the prison door and stared in disappointment at the figure hunched miserably inside. There was no large tricorn-hatted, it wasn’t a strong, plump, cook, instead, it was a pale boy with a heavily bandaged hand. The boy lifted his head up and looked as if he wanted to speak, but he would have only been talking to a closed door. Niria had slammed the door in his face.
“Well?†asked Sharpnose. “Is he from the Sea Roc?â€
“Yes,†said Niria shortly. Sharpnose waited. Niria still said nothing.
“And what do you wish us to do with him? Let him go free? Execute him?â€
Niria’s eyes widened; Ren gasped. Even Arn looked slightly taken aback.
“He is a traitor?†questioned Sharpnose.
“Yes,†said Niria, looking away. “He is that.â€
“So shall we execute him?â€
Niria did not seem able to talk. Ren thought of Tam’s terrified expression, thought of him rushing through the trees to join the Empire’s men, and then he thought of being totally alone, the only one in all of Sphaere who had the power to work the Orb of Centaur.
“NO!†he yelled.
Sharpnose turned his hard eyes on the boy.
“Don’t kill him,†said Ren, feebly. “He’s got . . . he’s got to be kept alive. Captain Pye had a plan for him.â€Tam shivered uncontrollably. The joy he once had when he had seen Ren was gone. In it’s place was an overwhelming dread. Ren had not been at all happy to see him. Everything had gone wrong. What would become of him now? Tam shuddered and surrendered his body to sleep.
Tam ran blindly in terror. Menacing shadows danced around him and he let out a bloodcurdling shriek. The fear was strong, so strong. Something grabbed his leg. Tam flailed and lost his balance, but did not hit the ground. Instead, he fell and fell through a dark, never-ending chasm. He heard distant voices calling to him at the bottom of the deep pit.
“The dark has taken us!†they cried. “Help us, lest you are taken as well!â€
Tam cried out and covered his ears, frantically trying to shut them out, but they persisted.
“Release us!†they commanded. “Free us from the dark! This task has been yours since the beginning of time. It is now the moment to act!â€
Tam panicked. The bottom was near; he could sense it! He twisted desperately around in midair and groped for some kind of handhold, but he found none.
“Do not be a fool, Tam,†another voice hissed. “Do not be a fool to choose death.â€
Tam’s eyes widened in horror; a shadow moved below him as Tam neared the ground. He screamed. He was about to die.
[Hmm. What’s the general opinion of this? I kind of like it, but it’s kind of over-the-top. Definitely not in desperate need of editing, though.]Ren jolted awake. His skin still prickled eerily after the glimpse of a stray dream he had just witnessed. He had seen Tam falling and . . . what was that thing? Whatever it was, it intrigued him. He guessed that Tam had been having these dreams for a long time. Well, if Tam was not going to act on them, then Ren would. He was going to get down to the bottom of this!
Ren slipped quietly out of his hammock and strode purposefully toward the brig. He opened the prison door with a slight creek and looked in. Tam was huddled up against the walls helplessly. After several hushed moments, Ren decided that Tam had not noticed that he was there, so he leaned over Tam’s still form and whispered, “Tam.â€
Tam jerked up abruptly and stared at Ren hopefully. “Ren.†Tam exclaimed breathlessly. “I was so afraid that you had abandoned me. I . . .â€
Tam’s voice died away as he looked at Ren. “No.†he said bitterly. “I do not know how, but you have seen my dream. I can see it your eyes. You have seen the endless torment that follows me wherever I go.â€
Ren watched in astonishment as he saw Tam withdraw into himself before Ren’s own eyes. He had never seen anyone so despairing in his life.
“Tam.†he insisted. “What does it mean?â€
Tam moaned and shook his head. “I do not know.†he groaned. “I do not know. They torment me, always torment me. Never can I escape, never. I’m trapped. I’m TRAPPED!†His last word was a fierce shriek and Tam jumped to his feet. Ren stared at him with growing concern on his face.
Tam now proceeded to shout into the thin air. It was as if Ren was no longer there.
“Who are these beings in your dreams?†Ren asked quietly.
“THEM!!†Tam screamed. “Who knows their name? They are those who are unknown. The unknown ones are forced away from this earth, so they must settle to destroy my spirit instead of my body. They are trying to DESTROY me!!†With a sob, Tam covered his face in despair.
“But, what do they want with you? What can you do for them?†Ren asked curiously.
Tam stared at Ren wildly for the first time during his rant. Ren shivered, for the look on Tam’s face was filled with pure hatred for those who tormented him. “They offer me peace and life but I know that the only thing that awaits me is death. DEATH! I will NOT do it! The Unknowables wish for me to bring them back to this world in which they were born but I am not a fool. They were banished by the clever one to a dark place and it is there that they will remain. They threaten me! HA! They are no one! They are the lost! What power do they have to send me to dwell in their dark domain! They have none! NONE!â€
Tam proceeded to laugh maniacally and Ren turned and left Tam alone once more in the dark.
[Er, whoa. And then there’s the brig thing. Where is the brig? is it really where prisoners are kept?]“Arn,†hissed Ren. “Arn! Where’s Niria?â€
Arn rolled over, the hammock swinging wildly underneath him. “What? Niria?†he mumbled. “What’s th’ matter?â€
“Tam’s gone mad!†said Ren. “I went to see him, because there was a dream-†he stopped short. Arn was looking at him as though he was mad.
“A dream? What are you talking about, Ren?â€
“Never mind,†said Ren hastily. “But do you know where Niria is?â€
“She got her own cabin ’cause she’s a girl, only she has to share with the kid.†Arn swung himself out of the hammock, fully clothed, and pulled on his cheap sandals. “C’mon, I’ll show you.â€Niria’s cabin was a tiny room the size of a closet, that was tacked onto the Stormmaster’s cabin. Ren and Arn held their breaths as thy passed the Stormmaster’s sleeping form, but they located Niria’s door with no difficulty, and slipped into blackness worse than the starlit night outside.
Ren was almost into Niria’s room when Arn stopped so abruptly that it was all Ren could do to stifle a cry. Peering over Arn shoulder, Ren saw the strangest sight he had ever seen.
Niria lay upon the bed of the barman’s daughter. The little girl had obviously been upset because there were tear stains on her cheeks. Niria was humming softly and rocking the young girl’s head back and forth.
Ren was amazed. This was the girl who had despised him for weeks? He had never seen this side of her! Ren and Arn lurked in the door of Niria’s cabin until the barmen’s daughter was asleep and Niria had stood up form the bed.
Arn knocked comically on the door and strode into the room as if he had just arrived. Niria stiffened self-consciously and nodded a greeting.
Arn took a deep breath. “Ren told me that he needs to tell you something.†he motioned to Ren nervously. Obviously, Arn knew that Niria had little pathience for Ren.
Ren fidgeted awkwardly and began.
“Tam’s gone mad,†he said.
Niria’s expression did not change. She twitched her right index finger, however, in a manner that Ren interpreted as “go on.â€
Ren sat on the bed with his hands beneath him. Niria eyed him icily as he took this liberty, but Ren didn’t notice. He was to busy trying to marshal his tumbled thoughts into a coherent sentence.
“I was getting scraps of his dreams,†he said cautiously.
Niria raised her eyebrows, and Arn let out a whistle. The bartender’s daughter stirred in her sleep.
Niria looked daggers at Arn, who bit his lip and mimed, “sorry.â€
Ren, feeling some explanation was needed, said, “Tam and I are . . . different. Some people have alchemical talent and some people have water power and some people have wind power.â€
Here Niria closed her eyes and a pained expression crossed her features. Ren plowed on. “Tam and me have FIRE power. We’re the only two people that do have fire power, and that’s why Captain Pye-†he faltered.
“Never mind about Octavio Pye,†said Niria harshly. “I know your unique powers. Get to the point.â€
Ren blushed furiously. “Well,†he hastily, “I got Tam’s dream, and it was really scary. So I went to see Tam, and he was MAD! Really crazy! He said the Unknowables-†Ren stopped. “I think he said the Unknowables kept telling him to restore them to their old power, but he won’t do it, because they’ve been torturing him. So he’s just making it worse for himself, and he’s going mad.â€
“Ah,†said Niria.
Silence.
“I think we need the Orb of Centaur,†said Ren uncertainly, when the quiet became torturous.
“Yes,†said Niria. “Yes.â€
It wasn’t until after the second silence, longer than the first, that Ren noticed an emptiness in the air next to him. Arn was gone.
Neither Niria nor Arn said anything for a moment, but then fear both for and of the cabin boy surged through Ren, and he turned panic-stricken features on Niria, who looked equally terrified.
“I think we can trust Arn,†she said, but her voice was dry and she got to feet. “But we might want to find him anyway.â€
Ren could not have agreed more. He sneaked a glance at Niria as they crept softly out of the tiny cabin, and she returned it with none of the hatred she usually directed toward him. It was driven out of her mind by concern.Arn stood outside the captain’s cabin, his heart thumping a thousand times a minute. There was no noise from within, but that didn’t mean Sharpnose was not inside, waiting to leap on young thieves. I’m a thief, Arn realized, and without further ado he pushed open the heavy oak door.
The cabin was as silent inside as out. Sharpnose was slumped across a table, fast asleep. A tidy stack of charts lay at his elbow, and a compass.
Arn’s breath left his body with a slow whoosh, and his muscles relaxed. No worries here. He would get a knife, do the deed, and go back to bed. No one would know until the morning, and Niria, if not Ren, was sure to agree with him. No one would care much if a traitor died, and they would be safer without an Empire spy on the ship.
He crossed the room with exaggerated care, never making a sound, and stood by the pirate captain, looking for the perfect weapon-preferably one that Sharpnose wouldn’t feel being removed from his person.Ren shivered uncomfortably. They had searched to no avail. Arn was nowhere to be seen. Niria shook her head wearily for the tenth time in the last hour.
“He’s not here either.†she lamented. “That can only leave one more possibility.â€
Ren looked up at her abruptly. “What do you mean?â€
Niria scowled at Ren and said, “He’s with Tam.â€
With that, she whirled around and headed toward the brig. Ren followed her hastily.Tam didn’t know what to think. Ren had come to see him hadn’t he? That meant that Ren cared about him, right? Tam shivered uncontrollably. He reminded himself that it wasn’t he, himself that Ren cared about, it was about the dream that they had shared. Ren’s reaction had frightened Tam. Ren hadn’t seemed frightened of the Unknowables, in fact, he had seemed enthusiastic about them!
Tam jolted out of his thoughts at the sound of a silent creaking of a door hinge. A shadow moved in the dark and Tam craned his neck to see.
“Ren?†he called.Arn cursed himself inwardly. The door to the brig was old and not used to being opened regularly. He should have guessed that it would make a slight noise. Perhaps…no, he had been heard. A figure stirred in the darkness and called out. Arn closed his eyes momentarily. He couldn’t stop to think. If he did, then he might back out. Arn squared his shoulders and stepped into the shadows.
Niria jogged desperately across the ship’s deck. She feared the worst for Arn. Niria had almost reached the brig when she heard a voice, “Ren?â€
Niria looked over her shoulder and saw Ren clumsily trying to keep up with her. This would have been a laughing matter, had the situation not been so serious. She turned back toward the noise and barely glimpsed Arn’s receding figure walking into the prison.
“Arn!†she cried, alarmed.
She ran toward the dark jail cell. A surprised gasp was heard from inside and Niria closed her eyes, expecting the worst. A strange sight awaited her.
When Niria stepped inside the brig, she did not see Tam lying dead on the ground and Arn standing guiltily over him. Instead, she saw the captain, Sharpnose, grunting and holding Arn in a forceful headlock. Ren came in, puffing, behind her and stared in surprise at the scene before them.
Sharpnose pried a knife out of Arn’s hand and cleaned it expertly on his nightshirt. The captain motioned toward Arn and said, “Your friend here stole my knife. That was a mistake.†he twirled his knife expertly in his hand. “Your friend also tried to kill an innocent and unarmed victim. That was another mistake.†he flipped his knife into the air and caught it with ease. “Your friend will not make another mistake, yes?â€
Niria sucked in her breath, alarmed. Sharpnose took his knife in his hand and grabbed Arn’s head roughly. Ren moaned and Niria covered her face. With one swift stroke, Sharpnose chopped off the multitude of hair that Arn had been cultivating for months. Arn’s eyes rolled to the back of his head and he slumped onto the floor in a faint.
Niria let out her breathe and knelt beside Arn worriedly. The captain merely shrugged and said, “Well, it was my best knife after all.†Sharpnose bent over Arn’s still form, picked him up, and carried him back to the forecastle.
[More layout problems, really. And then I don’t think Sharpnose would carry Arn anywhere.]Niria Tolmark lay in her bunk, trembling all over. The tense and frightening events of the night were making it impossible to sleep. The water slapped against the side of the Wavebreaker, and Niria’s power responded with a surge of longing. It had been ages since she’d worked the waves–three weeks? Four?
The bartender’s daughter shifted in her sleep, and Niria sighed. There would be no getting up to play with the sea while the girl slept. What a shame . . .
Niria’s eayes closed, and she sank into slumber.The sun shone brightly on the top of Ren’s head as he scrubbed the deck, but there was nothing bright about his mood. For the past fortnight, he had been tomented nightly by Tam’s nightmares. It wasn’t FAIR! They weren’t his, and he shouldn’t have to bear them. But while the nightmares made Tam hate the Uknowables, they made Ren, looking at it from a different perspective, want even more to save them.
“What’s the matter, Ren?†asked Arn on his way across the heaving deck. He was growing out his hair again, and it reached below his ears. He had trimmed it with Niria’s knife (and without her knowledge) the day before, and was fond of swishing it around his ears.
“Nothing,†said Ren, trying to put on a cheerful face. After the last incident, he had not told Arn of the nightmares.
“Alright,†said Arn. He started across the deck again. Ren watched him and sighed. Arn was so carefree, as if he had never tried to murder an innocent man, never been near to death himself.
“Oh well,†he said, the words the opposite of his temper, and gave the deck an extra vicious scrub.Niria bit her lip and leaned across the table. “That won’t work,†she objected. “We want to go south, towards Hermetopolis. I’m sure that’s where the Blood Storm is. I’m sure.â€
“You can’t be sure,†said the Stormmaster. “There is no way to be sure.â€
“Oh . . .†said Niria faintly. The man was right. She really didn’t know. But they had to go somewhere! As much as she hated to say it, she had to. “Sir . . . with all due respect . . .†She swallowed her words. Pirates never kept spies, that was for the dishonorable Empire, and it would be an insult indeed to imply that a pirate Stormmaster could send out his creatures of air or water to find an enemy ship.
Oh, Tzil, thought Niria miserably, under the stony gaze of the Wavebreaker’s Stormmaster. Why did you have to go, Tzil? You would understand.
Maybe. He hadn’t been entirely sound in those last moments. Sure, Niria hated Tam with a fiery passion herself, but to try to kill him was merely foolish! Anyone could tell the boy was brim-full of dangerously suppressed power.
Poor Tzil, thought Niria. Was he mad?A small, scruffy girl scrubbed pointlessly at an old, cracked plate. It was no use. The grime had remained on the plate for too long. Whatever the gunk had once been, it was now perfectly molded into the dish. The girl shoved the plate onto the top of a steeply growing pile with disgust.
“Hey, Mute!†a nasally voice called from a back room, “I need a hand here!â€â€˜
“Mute†gratefully left the tower of dishes and shuffled into the cupboard to help the ship’s cook. The cook was a rather thin man with a large nose and several wispy strands of hair that hadn’t managed to fall out of his head yet. The young girl had to hide a laugh when she walked into the cupboard. The cook was trying to hold a box full of dried herbs that was twice his size. The man’s neck craned wildly over the box in an attempt to see her. This slight movement made the man sway precariously and his legs trembled as if they were about to collaspe.
“Mute†smiled and gently releived the ship’s cook of his burden. She carried the box into the main kitchen with only a small strain of exertion. The ship’s cook followed her, shaking his head.
“You young people!†he exclaimed. “You think that you’re immortal don’t you?! Well, you know what? Someday, you’re going to loose your strengh! Everything ages! Everything eventually dies! You just wait! You’ll see!â€
The girl smiled, amused. The cook could never rest unless he had something to rant about. “Mute†nodded at the cook agreeably. She knew that the cook could talk for hours if he thought that you disagreed with him.
The cook stared at her suspiciously but made no comment. Instead, he turned to the sink. “Oh my!†he said, “You haven’t finished the dishes!†“Mute†shook her head shyly. “Well, I suppose that I could finish them. Young people should be enjoying the outside anyway!†The girl grinned happily and thanked the old man. He waved her away and went to work. “Mute†skipped out the kitchen door and onto the deck. A whole evening of freedom! What fun!
A inviting ray of sun glinted merrily against the deck of the Wavebreaker. The eyes of the bartender’s daughter lit up and she ran past the hordes of busy sailors to the front of the ship. Her mouth open in a silent cry of joy, she leaned excitedly over the ship’s railing, letting the wind blow her hair behind her. There was no other feeling, none in the world, that was more wonderful then the feeling of the fresh, salty air of the ocean running through her body! She could stand there forever, and still be content if she had the chance. With this thought, the girl frowned and turned her back to the wind. No, she could never stay here forever, not when Papa was somewhere else, far away.
A movement in the distance caught her eye, and the girl turned back to look out over the sea. A large, black shape was flying toward the Wavebreaker at an intense speed. The imposing figure aproached, and ,to the girl’s amazement, it landed with a soft “thump†on the figurehead at the bow of the ship. The creature was a strange, somewhat unreal, form of raven. Without a moments hesitation, the bird sqawked and transformed into a shorthaired cat.
Her eyes expanded in both surprise and alarm and the girl opened her mouth to scream, yet, of course, she could not suceed in getting anything to excape her lips. The cat looked up and saw her. With an unexpected purr, it jumped up onto the railing the sidled up to the girl. It let out an amused “meow†and walked straight past her, flicking her lightly on the nose with it’s tail. With an annoying air of cockiness, it turned around, spat, and tranformed once more into a lizard. The creature skurried hurriedly out of sight.
The girl stood there, speechless, for several seconds before what had happened sank in. She jolted upright and ran toward the main part of the ship. She had to tell someone about what had just transpired!
[D’you think the cook’s unnecessary? -is trying to cut down on characters-]Niria was lost for words. How could she possibly convince the Stormmaster to listen to her? However, Niria’s train of thought was stopped by a slight tugging on her sleeve. A young girl stood before her with an alarmed expression on her face. Niria bent down beside the girl with concern.
“Are you all right? Is something wrong?†Niria asked.
The girl nodded her head furiously and motioned toward the bow of the ship. Niria jogged worriedly in the general direction of where the girl had directed.
The sight that met Niria’s eyes was nothing like she’d had in mind. There was nothing there, nothing. Niria frowned and turned expectantly toward the girl, who had followed her. The little girl gave Niria a pleading look and attempted to make several complicated hand motions as an explanation.
Niria sighed and shook her head. She knew that the bartender’s daughter did not belong in a world of pirates and that she often got lonely. Niria bent down and took hold of the little girl’s shoulders.
“I’m sorry, but you know that I’m busy right now. We can spend some time with each other tonight, alright?†Niria promised.
The girl opened her mouth, as if to say something, but nothing came out. Niria smiled sadly and left the girl, standing alone at the bow.A middle-aged man sat professionally at his desk, steadily writing on a thick peice of parchment. He did not even stop to look up from his work when a small, bony man entered his office. An intense silence came upon the room, so that the only sound was the continuous scraching of the pen. The intruder wringed his hands nervously as a bead of sweat ran down his nose and said “Umm…mmm…mmm Ahem sirâ€. His last words came out in a high pitched sqeak, making his addressor’s whiskers twitch, his only sign of acknowledgement.
Apparently, this acknowledgement was sufficient because the boney man continued. “C-c-c-captain, I…… I ……..I .. I ……I ..I ..I …….I ……….â€
The man lasped into a brief silence when the Captain raised his hand for quiet.
“You wish to know the whereabouts of a certain prisoner of war.†the Captain said expectantly.
“Y-y-yes sir!†the bony man replied.
“We found difficulties during questioning and he has been dealt with accordingly.†the Captain explained.
The intruders pale face turned slighty pink. “But…but….that….that’s not…… he was my………â€
The Captain raised his head abruptly and examined the man with a slow, confident smile. “Are you questioning my authority Jeremier?â€
Jeremier became flustered.â€I….I was only suggesing sir th..th..that any influencial information extracted would…. would be most helpful to…..to my……re..repu..pu..tation.â€
The Captain’s eyes glittered maliciously. “Any information that was found is in good hands, mine.â€
Any other move of protest escaped the Jeremeir’s mind as the Captain stood up.
“I would appreciate it if you would show yourself out of my office, Jeremeir. Good day to you.â€
With a pitiful whimper, Jeremeir hurried out of the Captain’s presence, closing the door carefully behind him.The prisoner leaned back against the chilly wall of the cell. He flicked what may have been a dead rodent away from him, and sighed. Three days since the last glimpse of light in this cell. Oh, he hated this.
Even as he thought that, a door burst open somewhere above him, letting a glimmer of light through a chink in the stone. The prisoner basked in the pathetic ray, and hope flooded through his bones.
But the light was not all that penetrated the cell’s wall. There was also a sound, a voice protesting. “Let go of me! I am –â€
“You can shut yer mouth, whoever you are.â€
The prisoner crept closer to the chink and put his eye to it. But the sudden light blinded him and he pulled back, unable to see.
After several excruciating minutes, the prisoner’s eyes adjusted again to the blackness that had returned over the cell once more. He leaned forward and listened to the silence coming from the opposite cell. Slowly, yet surely, a pitiful moan could be heard coming from the newcomer. It was a sound that came only at a time of deepest despair, a time when one’s vision was clouded with misery and the mind gave way to dark wanderings. It was a sound that had reached the prisoner’s ears all too often.
Once the silence had returned, the prisoner put his mouth up to the hole in the wall.
“Hey, stranger!†he said “Have you got anything on ya?â€
A muffled gasp came from the other side of the wall and then a raspy voice answered him. “I was searched after I was captured.â€
Swearing, the prisoner pounded his fists against the wall in frustration. He turned desperately toward the hole in the wall again and pleaded, “Come on, have a heart! Could ya by any chance have some tobaccy up ya sleeve that them theiven dogs didn’t sniff out?â€
The prisoner’s plea was only answered with a tired laugh, a sound rarely heard in the dungeons. It lifted the prisoner’s head and brought a smile to his lips.
“Friend,†he said truthfully, “laughter in this place is more priceless then all the gold of the world.â€
He reached his hand through the hole. Another hand, one that had seen many days and had known a great deal of hard labor, met his own and they shook heartily.
“Ma name’s Jack Swinely.â€the prisoner introduced.
“Well met.†the newcomer acknowledged. “I am known as Pye, Octavio Pye.â€
“Nice to meet ya,†said Swinely, “though there could be nicer places ta meet.â€
Octavio Pye sighed. “I quite agree.â€
“So,†said Swinely, making conversation, “how did ya come ta be here?â€
“I don’t rightly know,†said Pye. “I wasn’t conscious when it happened.†He sounded sad. “And you?â€
“Eh,†grunted Swinely. “Ya don’t wanna know.â€
“Are you sure about that?†Octavio moved a little closer to the wall to counter Swinely’s quiet voice. “I’ve had my share of unlawful deeds, you know.â€
“Ah don’t wanna think about it, then. Ah never should’ve gone to the city. Too close ta the blasted ocean. Ah should’ve known.â€
“Know what?â€
“The Emperor was stronger than I though he would be,†he said, staring at the ceiling. “Ah lost everythin’.â€
“Ah,†Octavio said, nodding. “It appears to be the same for everyone. It’s a pity that those in the city can’t see all of us prisoners and hear our stories, or we’d be able to get a rebellion against the Empire faster than the swish of a sword.â€
“That’s what we’d all like ta think, isn’t it?â€
“Don’t you think so?â€
“I dunno what I think. Sometimes I think I might get out of here before I die, and sometimes I think there’s no chance.â€
“Oh, you might very well get out before you die.†This was said so sarcastically that Jack couldn’t help but feel that Mr. Pye wasn’t being nearly as optimistic as the words implied.
“And?†Jack said, wondering if there was more behind the words.
“Look, how long have you been in here for?†Octavio said, chuckling grimly.
“A while…†he said suspiciously.
“That explains it, don’t it?†Octavio said, nodding. “The world’s changed a lot for the worse in the past decade. The Empire is stronger than ever, and eerily enough, more people trust the Emperor as well. Sometimes I wonder if life might be better off if I just gave in.â€
“If you gave in, the only thing that would change is whether or not ya kept on planning an escape. When ya get to this point, there’s no difference between resisting and giving in, but ya sleep better if ya pick the latter.â€
“Oh, but I can’t give in. There are too many people I need to see fulfill their destinies. I’ve got to get OUT!â€
“We’ve all got to get out, Mr. Pye, and yelling about it ain’t gonna make a difference. If ya yell the guards come, and we don’t want that.â€
Octavio sank back, muttering. “If I hadn’t tried the Bonding, none of this would have happened. I should have listened to Niria.â€
Jack heard this, but he did not ask questions. All prisoners had their secrets, and from the despair he could hear in the other man’s voice, he could tell he had no right to intrude on this one.
There was a long pause, and then finally Octavio spoke again.
“So,†he said, his voice heavy with weary. “What do we do now?â€
The avid conversation abruptly ended. Jack thought about Octavio’s question with a furrowed brow. What would they do? What had he been doing for the past years? He had been sitting in this same room, brooding in the dark. He could not count how many times he had thought of escape, but those thoughts had simply been dreams, false hopes to make up for his inactivity. Now that this new stranger had put this question to him, he couldn’t think what to say. Maybe, just maybe . . .
“I think that we can do it.†Jack said with baited breath.
“Do what?†asked Octavio.
“Escape.†Jack’s voice was full of excitement.
“But how? Do you have a plan?â€
“Not as such,†admitted Jack. “But if we put our heads together, we could probably think of somethin’. Are you an alchemist?â€
“No,†said Octavio. “No. Why?â€
“I am,†said Jack, as though he were a child with a secret.
“Really?†Captain Pye had encountered hundreds, if not thousands, of alchemists. He had learned that everyone had some alchemical power, if not a lot. He was not impressed, but he saw no harm in listening to his fellow prisoner.
“Yep. That’s why I’m here, in fact.â€
“Really?†Now he was slightly intrigued. The Emperor didn’t usually put people in prison simply for having alchemical power. Old Sanguinus IV, in fact, had been a notoriously powerful alchemist.
“Yep. I was . . . well, let’s say I wasn’t the most law-abidin’ of citizens. I worked for a man, an’ he wasn’t too law-abidin’ either. Now I had no idea I was an alchemist up until one day when I accidentally turned some little trinket into pure gold. This was a mighty shock to me, and I never woulda told anyone, but this man I was working for, he saw. He told me to do it again, and when I couldn’t, he got pretty mad. An’ I thought it was over, and I’d best get outa his sight, so I boarded the nearest ship and left the city. And then a few days later, this nasty big boat came and they talked to the captain and said I was wanted for smugglin’, and the captain he turned me over – Lord knows what they payed him for it – and here I am, and I’ve been here for goodness knows how long. And there ya have it.â€
“I see.†Captain Pye frowned in concentration. A plan was beginning to hatch at the back of his mind.
“What’r you thinkin’ of?†Jack said suddenly, looking suspicious.
“Out of curiosity,†Captain Pye said, ignoring the question. “Do the guards know what each man was put in jail for?â€
“Of course,†Jack said solemnly. “That way dey know how well ter guard us.â€
“Perfect,†Captain Pye said, rubbing his chin. “What if you were to tell that guard right there that if he let us out you would turn the bars of this cell into gold for him? Do you think he’d believe you?â€
“Maybe,†said Jack doubtfully. “But he’s probably trained to look out for stuff like that.â€
“But it can’t hurt to try,†said Octavio.
“All right,†Jack said slowly as though agreeing to a death sentence. “But you have to do all the talking.â€
“Hey, guard!†Pye said, motioning with one chained arm. “C’mere.â€
The guard warily took a few steps towards them, and then a few more when Pye continued to beckon furiously.
“What?†he said roughly. “Did someone die?â€
Pye smiled. “No, no. But we have a proposal to make.â€Ren woke from another of Tam’s nightmares. He lay with his eyes closed, feeling the fear drop away to be replaced with anger. Always anger. Why couldn’t Tam’s dreams stay in Tam’s head? Why couldn’t he just help the Unknowables like they wanted? It wasn’t fair.
He sat up and swung his feet out of the hammock, sticking them into his worn sandals. The forecastle was stuffy and filled with the snoring of the crew. Maybe he would go talk to the watchman.
The air on deck was comfortably warm, and the moon and stars were obscured by the heavy, humid clouds. Ren started towards the watchman, but then changed his mind and headed in the other direction instead. He wasn’t in the mood for conversation.
He leaned on the railing and stared out into the blackness. He whispered a word and small flame sprang up in hand. This was a trick he had mastered over the past week, and he felt slightly guilty whenever he tried it. He could just imagine Captain Pye’s disapproval, telling him of the wounds the fire could inflict, or Niria’s cold glare at the boy whose uncanny powers had nearly killed her captain and who had driven her friend to insanity.
He sighed miserably and extinguished the flame, but then it flickered back to life, and he found himself staring into the eyes of a large black-and-white bird. A stormy petrel.
He jerked back, and suddenly the railing was aflame. He realized what he had done and the fire went out. He prayed to the Unknowables that the watchman had not seen the light.
And the bird was no longer a bird, now it was a tall figure clad in dark blue and smelling of seawater.
The figure moved in front of Ren, blocking the rest of the ship from Ren’s sight. The cloak swirled across the deck, reminding Ren of wisps of smoke. The visitor leaned in and let out a gurgling whisper. “Greetings fire bringer.†it said. “I have brought hope to your totally hopeless existence.â€
Ren’s eyebrows raised and he crossed his arms. “Somehow, I seriously doubt it.†he said.
The figure ignored this comment and continued. “The great Mordran has a proposition for you. All charges, including any on your family or any other close relation, will be lifted from your name if you agree to all terms laid down by the empire’s most trusted official, the great Mordran.â€
Ren’s eyes grew wide with astonishment. They were certainly offering a lot! All he would have to do was agree, and afterward, he and all of his friends and family could have a relatively normal life. But at what cost?
[Ren has no family.]
Ren’s thoughts were interrupted by a shout from the opposite side of the ship. The guard must have seen his fire after all!
The cloaked figure turned toward Ren once more. “I will be waiting.†it hissed, and turned once more into a raven. It disappeared just as the watchman arrived. The man ran up to Ren, panting. “I, I saw fire on the deck!†he gasped. “What, what happened?â€
Ren smiled reasurringly. “It’s OK sir. I have it under control.â€
The guard stared at Ren curiously. “Well, †he relented, “if you’re sure…..â€
Ren nodded enthusiastically and the man shrugged. “OK then. I’ll guess I’ll get back to my post.†With that, the guard left the area.
Ren let out a sigh of releif and turned back toward the ocean. He craned his neck but could see no sign of his visiter. Ren shook his head. He could not possibly agree to Mordran’s wishes. If he did, the consequences would haunt him for the rest of his life.
Ren paced along the deck, his eyes closed, trying to block out the signs that another of Tam’s nightmares would soon be sent his way.As Ren tried to avoid the darkening presence in his mind that was Tam and Tam’s nightmares, nobody else was having a good time either. On the deck of a dark ship, two gleaming eyes broke the darkness. Suddenly something broke the silence – well, not really. The sleek white figure burst into the moonlight, and looked at the stars. She knew something was about to happen.
After a moment or so, she was proved right. A thought tickled her mind, and she enveloped it, letting it in. “What is it?†she breathed with her mind. “Who is this?
“Alexis,†the voice said, with a hint of desperation. “Marmalade, we need to help Ren and Tam.â€
“Why?†Marmalade said, bowing her head slightly. “My master is Captain Pye. He needs help more than the human children.â€
“Marmalade, everyone knows that two Pukises are better than one,â€
“True, but what about your children?â€
There was a long pause, before Alexis continued, her voice cracked with sorrow.
“They’ve been taken,†she whispered. “By the Empire. I’ve got to find them too, but my gut tells me I will find them where I find Ren. Please help me, Marmalade.â€
[Why does the Empire want little Pukises? It make more sense for them to have been taken by trappers. Plus Alexis was captured! ???]
Marmalade’s thin body slipped back into the many shadows on the deck. “I will think about it,†she said, her voice travelling over miles and miles to echo hollowy in Alexis’s head. “I will think.â€Dark shadows lingered on the floor of the ship. No movement stirred the night; only the calm motion of the ocean waves could be heard in the stillness. Ren sat motionless, his eyes fixed on a distant point, his breathing slow and deliberate, the back of his neck coated with sweat.
A breeze brushed past the boy and the shadows flickered. Ren flinched uncomfortably and twitched his fingers one at a time, as if stretching out any stiff joints. Out of the shadows stepped a menacing figure, dressed in a flowing, black cloak.
“I see you have been waiting for me.†the figure hissed. “Have you made you decision?â€
Ren shifted in his seat, “I have made a descision, yes.â€
The cloaked figure moved forward eagerly. “I trust it is the correct one.†it gurgled.
Ren nodded slowly. “I believe it is.†he assured.
With a shout, the room was flooded with light. Crew members flooded into the room from all directions, surrounding the boy and the wavespirit.
“How dare you defy the might of the empire!†the wavespirit screeched. “You will pay dearly with your lives!â€
With a roar, the figure shriveled the disappeared through the floor.
A great cry arose among the men. “Search the ship!†a gruff voice yelled. “It can’t have gone far!â€Darkness. Darkness. Can’t escape. Must escape!
Pleading voices echoed in Tam’s head. “Help us Tam!†“Set us free Tam!â€
“Nooooo!†Tam screamed. With a shriek, he fell. And fell. And……….
Tam awoke with a start in the darkened dungeon. He warily wiped the tears and sweat off his face. Yet another night with the same horrifying dream. Or, at least, he thought it had been a night. It was hard to tell anymore the difference between night and day in the darkness of the ship’s (hold?).
The shadows twisted in the room and Tam briefly saw movement in the corer of his eye. Before he could turn around, a hand grabbed him from behind.
“Tam,†a voice murmured behind him. “I found you just in time. The empire has come back for you. I’ll take you out of this situation in a minimum amount of time.â€
Tam stared curiously as the darkened figure hastily unbound him. This was all happening so fast! Tam weighed his options. He could stay with the ship and most likely sit in a dungeon until pirates killed him, or he could go back to the empire, where he might have a chance at escaping before anything too terrible occurred. The wavespirit stood up, headed toward the entrance, and impatiently waited for Tam.
†Now boy!†it ordered gruffly.
Tam hesitantly stood as well and joined the wavespirit. He would set his chances with the empire.
The wave spirit took Tam by the hand, as the boy began to hear voices and pounding footsteps above his head. “What’s happening?†he asked, sounding small and frightened even to himself. “How are we going to get off of here?â€
The wave spirit said something in a gurgly whisper, and Tam felt the clasps around his ankles melt away, and then he found there was light from a phlogiston lamp shining in his eyes, and he blinked once, twice. He was staring into someone’s familiar eyes. And it wasn’t someone he wanted to ever see again.
“Well,†said Tera. “Look who it is.â€
[At first it isn’t clear that a wave spirit has come for him, and then it’s even less clear that he’s gone somewhere. This scene needs clarification.
]Alexis opened her blue eyelids one by one, and stretched out her long, furry body in common cat-like fashion. She looked around her place of rest – an island, far from any known human civilizations, that she had settled on to rest from her fruitless search for her young, and Ren as well.
Suddenly she heard a faint noise in her head. At first she stiffened, but then she relaxed as she recognized Marmalade.
“I have decided,†Marmalade said, her voice hard with resolve.
“What?†Alexis whispered, suddenly feeling faint with worry.
Marmalade paused for a long while, causing Alexis to bat at her tail to keep herself from jumping into the sea in anxious despair.
“I will help you.â€
“Really?†Alexis said, breathing a sigh of relief. “When? How?â€
“Meet me on Lithuslov in two days time. Even Pukis thought communications are no longer safe from the Empire. We must talk face to face.â€
“Two days? I am much further than two days journey from Lithuslov, even if I don’t stop to eat or rest at all.â€
“You’ll find a way, Alexis, or else Ren and your young will not be receiving assistance from me.â€
Alexis was quiet for a moment as she weighed the pros and cons.
“Marmalade,†she finally said. “We have not always been the best of friends, but I know noone else to turn to. I will come, and even if I am too late, I hope I will find someone who can help me. Thank you.â€
“It’s the least I can do.â€The sun shone brightly, glittering on the brilliant blue sea. It was hard to believe that anything could be wrong on such a day. The sky overhead was cloudless, and a stiff breeze played buffeted the blue Pukis. Her wing were sore, her scales salty from the spray, but she was close to Lithuslov. Oh! So close! Although her two days had ended the night before, she flew on now simply because she must reach land.
And reach land she did, three hours later, and collapsed on the warm rocks and sand of a sheltered cove, too tired to shape-change, too tired to move, too tired to think. And she slept.
Her sleep was broken by a voice in her head, a clear one. It said, Wake up, Alexis.
Her eyes snapped open, she leaped up, bristling.
It was Marmalade. She sat on her haunches on a large rock, gold and cream fur illuminated by the red and glowing sunset.
“You’re still here.†Remembering what the other Pukis had said of Pukis communications being no longer private, Alexis did that one thing Pukises never did. She spoke aloud.
To any human, it would have been only a hissing and crackling mew, but to a Pukis, it was as distinct as a thought.
“What next?†she whispered, her voice unused to the action.
Marmalade snapped her head back from where she was grooming her paw and stared at Alexis. “You spoke?†she said, narrowing her eyes suspiciously.
“If it’s the only safe way to communicate, why not? This will keep humans who would harm us from finding out our plans.â€
“But Alexis,†Marmalade said, her voice thick with worry. “Humans aren’t the least of our problems. I am more worried about those other Pukis who would do thing to avoid being captured and made into a coat.â€
“Wonderful. Absolutely wonderful.â€
Alexis peered nervously around the clearing. Things really had to be bad if Pukis were beginning to turn each other in to save their own skins, literally.
“So, what is our plan?†Alexis gurgled.
Marmalade jumped down from her perch and leaned close into Alexis, whispering…
“The fire conjurer and his friends are headed toward the empire ship called the Blood Storm, where the great orb is being held, on a pirate ship. The Blood Storm is the 200-gun flagship of the Sanguiz Empire. Because of the ship’s high security, it is the perfect place for the Orb or Centaur. I do not know what Ren and others plan to do with the Orb, but what I do know is that they have promised the pirates treasure and when those brutes find that there is none, there will be trouble.â€
Alexis stiffened. “What does Ren plan to do with the Orb?â€
Marmalade hesitated. †I don’t think he’s sure what to do himself. Either way, with each passing moment, he gets closer and closer to Mordran and deeper into trouble.â€
Alexis leaped up from her spot. “Ren’s plan can not fail! It’s importance is too great! Come, we must leave immediately!â€
Leave immediately? said an unfamiliar voice in the heads of Marmalade and Alexis. I think not.
They whirled around, fur bristling. A red-gold Pukis hovered above them, dragon-formed, his beautiful, delicate face inscrutable. We don’t have much of a choice, he said. The trade is growing. We betray our kin, or we die.
I would rather die! mind-shrieked Marmalade.
Would you?
Yes!
You are a pet, he said scornfully.
Marmalade leaped, switching forms mid-flight, beating her glittering wings angrily, golden claws extended. The red Pukis dodged.
Marmalade! called Alexis. Stop! Think it through! Ren!
Marmalade did not heed her. Alexis flew at her, knocking her out of the air as she lunged again at the stranger. Leave him be! the blue Pukis scolded. Then, to the male, Please, don’t betray us. We’ve got to go. We’ve got to.
Don’t we all! But we can’t, can we?
Please! No one has to know!
They would know. His eyes were no longer on Alexis or the simmering Marmalade beside her, but on someone behind them. The two Pukises turned as one, to see a grizzled man in a leather tunic tensed, net in hand, ready to seize them. Marmalade gave a furious hiss, and flew at his head, a miniature stream of flame directed at his helmeted scalp. A split second later, Alexis joined her. The red Pukis hovered, looking on as the two females attacked his master. The from nowhere, he joined them, diving at the man’s unprotected eyes.
The Pukis furrier was outnumbered. His helmet was growing uncomfortably warm, and no longer seemed as safe as it had been a moment ago. He fled into the woods, and Alexis coasted down onto a rock, followed by Marmalade and the red Pukis.
There are options, you see, she remarked to him, switching to cat-form and beginning to clean herself.
I suppose.
They said nothing for another hour or so, resting, washing. Marmalade caught a small rodent and roasted it, then gobbled it up in two bites. Alexis did the same. The red Pukis watched them.
We should go, said Alexis. I hope it is not already too late.
Too late for what?
We have a task.
A task.
Yes.
What does it entail?
If only we knew!
Well… A moment of hesitation. If ever you need me, send word.
Alexis cocked her head. It was possible to communicate over great distances, but it was an unreliable method of speaking, and rarely used. Who shall we send for?
It was a Pukis name, long and impossible for human letters and words to replicate. Alexis nodded. Marmalade stood and stretched.
Well? said the cream-colored Pukis. Shall we go?
They launched themselves into the air and began to fly.
[I really like this scene, but it’s a little unnecessary. Maybe we could just cut out the bit about sending for the red Pukis, or maybe we can actually have him show up with a flock of Pukises during the battle (or does that already happen? I can’t remember).]“You can do that?†the guard asked.
“Of course I can.†Jack assured. “Damned power’s why I’m hear ain’t it?â€
The guard nodded slowly, his eyes gleaming with a hint of greed. He turned his back to Jack and scouted out the area. Yes, the timing could not have been more perfect. The guards shift was not scheduled to end for several more hours and no other guard was in the premises.
“It’s a deal if you can prove it.†the guard said. Without any hesitation, the man bent over and unlocked Jacks cell. As Jack scrambled out the door, the guard handed him his iron staff.
“Here.†the guard said. “Turn my staff to gold. If you can do it, then you’ve got yourself a deal.â€
“Sounds good to me.†Jack said. With an experienced twirl, Jack took the staff and clunked it onto the guards head. The man fell like a stone.
“That was easier then I thought it’d be.†Jack commented. He bent down and took the guards keys out of his pocket. With a flourish, he unlocked Octivio’s door.
“Hmmmmm.†Jack contemplated. “It seems a shame to keep everyone else cooped up.†A mischievous twinkle came into his eyes. He glanced at Octivio with a crooked grin. “What do you say? Jailbreak?â€
A few short minutes later, a little group gathered around Octavio and Jack. There were only about ten of them, as the Blood Storm tended to transfer its prisoners off to other ships promptly, for fear of just such an attack as this (â€It’d serve ‘em better to hire some smarter guards,†said Jack with a wink.), but there were enough.
“What’s the plan?†asked one, a bony fellow with a crooked nose.
“It’s very simple,†said Octavio. “We go out, and we fight our wy to the lifeboats. Chances are we won’t make it, but it’s better than sitting here in the dark.â€
“Yessir!†said a prisoner.
Octavio turned to Jack. “What do we have by way of weapons?â€
“This staff, his pistol, his knife, and his sword. That’s all.†It was a dismal display. Octavio wished he had his own pistol here, but of course he did not. “Four weapons among…†a swift count of heads “…eleven people. That won’t do.â€
“We could bash ‘em with the lantern,†suggested Jack.
“Five weapons. That leaves six without.†Octavio was beginning to doubt the soundness of his plan. Not that it had ever been very sound in the first place.
“Who needs weapons!†someone cried, and it was echoed among the newly freed prisoners.
“We’ll get ‘em off the soldiers!†said another.
Octavio hesitated. He hated to leave any army he was in charge of without proper weapons, but what choice did he have? “Here,†he said, handing out the staff, pistol, knife and sword and giving the lantern to Jack.
Jack smiled. “So. Shall we go?â€
“Why not?†The ascended the ladder one by one, first Jack, holding the lantern, then Octavio, then the stream of ex-prisoners, out into the light.
No one was nearby, and consequently they had a head start of a few few seconds. But they were unaccustomed to the light, and that head start was lost blinking in the sun. And then the crew of the Blood Storm descended upon them.When that morning had dawned, red and fiery, there had still been no sign of Tam. And now, in the late afternoon, Ren lay asleep in his hammock, worn out from trying to make contact with the other boy. He didn’t know why he bothered. He should be glad that he no longer had to deal with Tam. But he no longer trusted the older boy. He was weak-minded and traitorous, afraid of both sides of this battle. Who knew what damage he would wreak? Ren closed his eyes. Never had he wanted the Sea Roc like this, with her steady, trustworthy captain, the cheerful and colorful alcooktor, and the sailors whose company he had grown to enjoy. To think, only a few months ago, he had lived a comfortable, safe life with his uncle. From there, he had been plunged into the strange world of pirates and disturbing powers, and as soon as he had begun to get used to that, everything had changed again. And again. And again. “Sphaere, what I wouldn’t give for a normal life again,†he groaned.
A shout from the deck. Ren leaped to his feet, and bolted out into the light. “What’s going on?†he asked Arn, as the latter headed toward where Niria and the Wavebreaker’s other stormmaster had gathered.
“They’ve sighted the Blood Storm!†said Arn.
In less than an hour, they were near enough to the Blood Storm that Ren could make out individual figures on the deck. He squinted. “They’re fighting,†he said.
“What?†Captain Sharpnose had come up behind him, carrying a telescope. Inwardly Ren cringed. He could never get used to the man, with his warlike appearance and smell of alchemical powder.
“There’s a fight, sir. On the deck.â€
“A fight?†Captain Sharpnose said, drawing in a quick breath. “Who?â€
“I dunno, why don’t you look yourself?†Ren said sharply. “You’re the one with the telescope.â€
With a grunt of surprise, Sharpnose drew out his telescope and peered over at the Bloodstorm. “Indeed.†he said slowly. He leaned over the deck rail intently, as if he were surveying the scene. With a sharp intake of breathe, Sharpnose suddenly stood back and roared the most blood-curdling battle cry Ren had ever heard in his life. Ren fell back, startled, as the deck immediately filled up with a mixed array of pirate crew members, all armed to the teeth.
“Broadside her mates!†Sharpnose declared.
The crew cheered and scrambled about the ship in a furious swarm. Sharpnose turned and helped Ren back to his feet. Chuckling, he said,â€Yah’d best get yer sea legs lad. Today we’ll be receivin gold and glory! Gold and glory lad!†still chuckling, the pirate captain lumbered away.
Ren chewed his lip nervously and looked over at the Bloodstorm, which was coming closer and closer every minute. Was it really going to be this easy? Wasn’t this supposed to the greatest battle ship ever since………..
*BOOM* The foundations of the deck under Ren’s feet shuddered, forcing Ren to his knees. Of course, nothing was ever easy.
Roars throughout the ship were evidense enough that the empire’s cannons had done their job. Responding shots resounded from the interior of the Wavebreaker.
“Ren!†came a cry from behind him. “What’s happening?!†Niria ran toward him and ducked down beside him.
“I’m not exactly sure.†Ren replied. “All I know is that we’re going to board he Bloodstorm but someone’s already on the deck, fighting.â€
Niria nodded, understandingly as Arn joined them. “So, are we going to destroy the Orb?†Arn asked. “That’s the plan, right?â€
Ren hesitated for a moment. “I’m not sure about that.†Ren said. “I think we need to use it; we need to release the Unknowables.â€
Arn raised is eyebrows. “Is this about Tam’s dream again? You can’t be serious! How could we possibly beleive anything from that traitor?!â€
Ren opened his mouth too protest but was shocked into silence when Niria said, “Ren’s right. Captain Pye thought the Orb was important enough to get a valuable copy of it at his own risk. There must have been something he wanted us to do with it.â€
Niria turned forcefully toward Ren. “Ren, †she said. “I know I haven’t always agreed with you on everything you’ve done, but I’m with you on this. To the very end.â€
Ren smiled gratefully at her and glanced at Arn, who was nodding uncertainly. “OK.†Arn said. “I’ll stick with you guys.â€
Another attack rocked the ship, sending waves onto the deck.
Arn leaped to his feet, “but we’re not going to get anywhere unless we reach the Bloodstorm!â€
Another cannon, this time closer, shook the Wavebreaker with tremendous force. Ren, Niria, and Arn leaped up to see the Bloodstorm dangerously close. A battle was certainly waging on the deck, if not a strange one. A small group of thin, desperate men were fighting against a whole army of empirial soldiers with an odd assortment of swords, muskets, and …….. was that a lanturn?
The 3 jumped back, startled, as several pirates ran up to the deck rail, screaming manically. Without any hesitation, the men started to board the Bloodstorm.
“Come on!†Arn yelled. “This is our chance!â€
Ren began to follow but was stopped by Niria. “Ren.†she said forcefully. “You must promise me. We will return for the bartender’s daughter when this is over.â€
Ren hesitated.
“Promise me!†Niria screeched, digging her nails into Ren’s arm.
“We will return, Niria.†Ren agreed reluctantly. “I promise.â€
Niria nodded. “Good. I’ll hold you to it.†With that, she followed Arn across the water to the deck of the Bloodstorm.
With a deep breathe, Ren followed suit.
The deck of the Blood Storm was chaotic even before a horde of well-armed pirates had swarmed over the side, and Ren found that he was losing his sense of direction. Niria stayed with him only long enough to wish him luck – rather loudly over the fray – and then she was gone, long hair flying, and Ren thought he heard her shout something that sounded like, “That’s for murdering the Captain!â€. Arn gave him a nod, a grin, and a wink, and then with a whoop, he plunged into the melèe.
Ren wanted to get out of this mess – and quick, before someone stabbed him. Gripping his knife, he stumbled towards the stern of the ship. The Blood Storm’s name was very fitting, he reflected, and then a sharp piece of metal snapped by his face. He felt blood trickle onto his cheek, but there was no pain. Yet. He ran.
And then he was through a door and the noise of the battle dimmed slightly. In front of him was a narrow, short corridor, ending in a door. On either side of the corridor was another door. He opened the one on his left, trying to think where the Orb would be kept. It revealed a spacious room with a four-poster bed and a definite feminine touch. He wrinkled his nose. What was this, the Captain’s wife’s room? He closed the door again and tried the one on his left. This looked more promising. He stepped forward into the Captain’s room.
[I think most of the ship part of this is wrong. The Blood Storm is huge – 200 guns – and I think it would be harder to board than that. Plus the cabins. Of course, the Blood Storm is larger and can fit more cabins, but spacious? I think not.]
Ren gasped in horror at the scene that greeted him.
Tam was kneeling on the floor, head bowed over a glowing sphere. His hands hovered a mere centimeter over the surface, and he was moaning slightly. Rake Vashkar stood over him, a long knife poised. A girl whom Ren had never seen stood by, hands folded, face impassive.
“Please,†whispered Tam, his voice hoarse. “Please, stop. I don’t know how it works.â€
“Kill them!†hissed Vashkar. “Kill the pirates.â€
“I don’t know how!†cried Tam.
“You will not remove your hands from the Orb until every last pirate has died,†said Vashkar coldly.
Tam whimpered. His hands shook. Ren could see the life ebbing from him. He stood there, just inside the door, silent, unnoticed, unsure. He felt half-inclined to leave Tam there, but other feelings got in the way. So many people had died because of him already…Tam need not join their number. And what if he succeeded in killing the pirates? That did it.
“Stop it,†he said loudly.
Vashkar turned. “Why look who it is! The other one! How perfect. Now when this one dies -†he prodded Tam with his toe “- you can replace him.â€
“No way,†said Ren, wishing desperately that he had any weapon but the tiny knife.
“I think you’ll find you’ll change your mind.â€
Ren’s mind whirled. He had to buy time. There was an alchemical pistol on the Captain’s desk, but how did he get there? “When we both die, there won’t be anyone left,†he said, beginning to edge towards the desk.
“One of you will succeed.†Vashkar lunged for the pistol himself. Ren jumped back as the room filled with the acrid scent of alchemical powder. The shot had hit the floor where Ren’s foot had been only a moment before. Of course. Vashkar wouldn’t kill him. Not this way.
If anything, that scared him more.
He looked across the room. The girl was pulling Tam away from the Orb. “Keep going,†she mouthed silently. “Distract him.â€Run! Run! They were around him! All around him! They reached for him, howled in his ears, lashed out at him.
“He’s here!â€
“He’s come!â€
“Free us!â€
“Free us!â€
The cries, persistent, screeched relentlessly in Tam’s ears. He had to escape! He had to run!
But wait…….his eyes clouded over and he saw a blade dangerously close to his neck. “Please, I…..†Tam protested, his vision blurred again and………
“Free us boy!â€
“Free us!â€
Sweat rolled off Tam’s cheeks as he screamed in anguish. At least, he thought he had screamed. It sounded different here, almost as if the air was made of a thicker substance and would not allow sound waves to travel correctly.
Suddenly, a new voice penetrated the terror. “You fools!†it said. “The boy is missing key. He can do nothing. Nothing!â€
A roar of anguish defined is ears and Tam collapsed, rolling into a pathetic heap.
“Why is he here?!†the voices bellowed. “Who has sent him?! Surely not…….â€
“No.â€screeched one. “There is no other presense with him.†Tam shuddered. He felt strange. Unattached to anything he had ever known. He raised his head weakly and a whimper escaped his lips. Strange. The world seemed quiet now. He strained his ears and heard hushed tones in the distance.
“He’s almost gone.†“Why is he here?†“Perhaps he displeased the master?†“No, the master could not finalize his plan without this boy, though he may be a fool.†“We will never be free without him either.†“What can we do?†“Nothing.â€
A growl interrupted the speech. “I have always known. I have felt it, though faint. There is another……â€
Tam shuddered. The voices were gone. What……..
He felt hands grabbing him forcefully and had a sensation of being dragged across the floor.He opened his eyes and saw an intense pair of brown eyes glaring down at him. With a moan, Tam blacked out.
[That’s confusing.]Niria caught sight a familiar figure through the battle, and her eyes misted up, as she remembered her Captain. She yelled something at the soldier she was battling, although she didn’t know what it was. And then that familiar figure was by her side. “Niria!†he said. “What on earth are you doing here?â€
Niria’s sword almost fell from her grasp. “Captain?†she asked faintly.
“The very same. Tell me, how is Ren?â€
“I don’t know, sir. He’s getting the Orb now. I can only hope…â€
The Captain nodded.
“What are you doing here, sir? We thought you had died.â€
“I might have, if it hadn’t been for the exceptionally good people I found in my prison. I wonder how they are now.â€
More and more people fell. Arn appeared, speckled in blood but seemingly intact. He did not appear to notice Niria or Octavio.
“So…†said Pye. “How many survived?â€
“I don’t know, sir. The ship was gone when we returned to the harbor.â€
“The ship! The Sea Roc!â€
“She is gone, sir.â€
Captain Pye’s face twisted into an undefinable expression. “Only to be expected,†he muttered.
“I’m sorry,â€
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 19th, 2008 @ 14:4965)
1. Oh yes! I definately love that part! 2. Yes! It is! It’s in the dictionary! Although, it is considered slang…..
3. Well, he wouldn’t just leave Arn lying there would he? Right?
4. I don’t think the cook’s unnecessary. I mean, it’s a good to have him in relation to the bartender’s daughter. And, I don’t know, I just always liked that scene. It just seemed like a relief from all of the action.
5. Hmmmmmmm. That’s true, although, we don’t know what happened to Alexis. We didn’t exactly say that she was captured. Although, if she hadn’t been captured, why wouldn’t she have gone back for Ren? Gurgle. What in he world could she have been up to?
6. Oh yeah! That part really needs clarification! I mean, one moment he’s on the Wavebreaker and the next he’s with Tera.
Kind of unnatural…..7. Yeah, I think we had planned to have an army of Pukis’ come to the battle, but we forgot about it in the heat of the action.
8. Well, actually, the room might actually be spacious. Some of the more advanced ships would be led by more wealthy captains and they could probubly afford to have larger cabins, especially since the ship itself was larger.
9. Yeah, it is a little confusing. But, I like the main gist of it.
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Alice
in July 19th, 2008 @ 15:0766-
2. What, the brig? A brig is a ship, Kiwi… -looks up- Ah, yes. A ship’s prison. You win.
3. I think he’d make Niria and Ren take Arn back.
4. OK. We’ll keep it.
5. She was captured, but escaped. However, using her magic against the wave spirit weakened her, and even when she recovered, she couldn’t find Ren because Tam’s nightmares were getting in the way. Eventually she realized she had to contact Marmalade, but Marmalade was looking for Cpt Pye and didn’t want to help, but eventually gave in. Or is that too confusing?
6. It’ll be easy to fix, though.
7. We should add it in! And then they can help the Wavebreaker’s crew win the battle (because honestly–a small ship against a huge ship. They aren’t going to win without help.)
8. Yeah, maybe. I dunno. I’m going to make little maps of all the ships that figure into it.
9. Yeah, but I’m not sure which voices are the Unknowables and which aren’t.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 19th, 2008 @ 19:0167)
5. Hmmmmmm. Well, I guess we should add that in the story because that isn’t mentioned at all in the story so far and readers will get confused.Wow. We went through the story really fast!
I guess we’ll have to actually start changing it now. Gurgle.
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Alice
in July 19th, 2008 @ 19:2268-
5. Oh, I just made it up.
Well, I didn’t comment on everything, because sometimes I wasn’t in the mood, or didn’t have the right words to explain how I felt about a certain piece, or just wanted to finish the commentary. So expect me to change much more than I listed.
First, let’s just add out scenes and rewrite and stuff, and then we can do it all over again.
There’s nothing like leaving a story alone for weeks to point out all the flaws.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 20th, 2008 @ 16:4469) Yeah, I thought that we had missed a few spots, like that terribly confusing scene with Letor and Scrimage. That scene has serious issues.
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Alice
in July 20th, 2008 @ 21:2970- I suggested that we just delete it entirely.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 21st, 2008 @ 09:44What would we replace it with? I mean, that scene was why the bartender helped them to get onto the Wavebreaker and why they have the bartender’s daughter along for the ride. I suppose it wouldn’t be that difficult to think of some other reason why the bartender spy in in trouble with the empire……….
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Alice
in July 22nd, 2008 @ 00:1272- Not at all. Simply for letting them see the tattoo, he might be in trouble.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 22nd, 2008 @ 13:17OMG!
I never thought of that! That’s an AWESOME idea! Gosh, if only we had done that before! That would have cleared up so much!
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The Bookworm & Lurline (410 piepoints and two B-Day Points and 42 KAG Points!)
in July 22nd, 2008 @ 21:09I really will read it soon…
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 24th, 2008 @ 07:23OK! Tis time to start! No more delay! *is determined*
Alright! So, were we going to have Ren get knocked out in order to keep the story flowing correctly?
Ren dimly noticed a man in blue and white clothing raising a hand, and a strong breeze blowing across the waterfront. A weatherweaver, he thought, but he wasn’t surprised. His head was reeling from hearing the name of Octavio Pye. Octavio Pye! The dreaded Captain Krakeneater of the pirate ship Sea Roc!!! He had been such a fool! He’d jumped out of the pot, only to land in the frying pan! Without a backward glance, Ren turned and sprinted away from the docks. He didn’t know where his path led, he just knew he had to get as far away from those blooodthirsty pirates as he could.
“Vushtek!” yelled a voice behind him.
With a gasp, Ren quickened his pace. They had noticed his escape! With any luck, this Vushtek was as slow as he was plump! In the distance, Ren spotted a turn in the street. Yes! If he could make that turn, then he could easily slip away from his pursuers! With an extra burst energy, Ren pushed himself forward. He let himself steal a smile of triumph as he rounded the bend and……. collided with a rather large man.
“Thought ye could escape that easily?” grunted a familiar voice.
Eyes wide with astonishment, Ren stared up into the eyes of the alchemist.
“So sorry.” the man said and slammed his fist into Ren’s head. Ren crumpled and fell to the ground, senseless.How is that? Or were we not going to knock him out? I don’t remember.
I thought about just letting him faint when he heard mention of Captain Pye, but that’s kind of cliche, right? Oh, and I think the “berth” think in the next paragraph is correct. Since a berth can refer to a fixed bed or bunk on a ship. And if that were correct, then the “door” would be right because Ren would have to be in a room to be on a berth, probubly the doctor’s room.
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Alice
in July 24th, 2008 @ 15:5476- Um. I was thinking let’s not knock him out at all.
And it would be a hammock… but we can keep the door.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 24th, 2008 @ 21:0777) Awwwwww. Really?
OK. Oh well. I guess I’ve had plenty other opportunities to knock out characters……..
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 26th, 2008 @ 19:46So, if we’re no gong to knock him out, then what are we going to do about that section? Are we just not going to bother having him wake up at all and just have him go ahead and talk with the captain about becoming a powder monkey?
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Alice
in July 27th, 2008 @ 00:4179- That’s what I was thinking.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 27th, 2008 @ 05:42Oh. OK. Sorry.
I had a slow moment.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 27th, 2008 @ 12:23Alas. So that brings us directly to the evil scene.
Gurgle. So, i guess we were going to rewrite that whole thing. Right?
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Alice
in July 27th, 2008 @ 13:3082- Right. I’m doing that right now.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 27th, 2008 @ 15:45Oh. OK!
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85
Alice
in July 27th, 2008 @ 18:03Ren dimly noticed a man in blue and white clothing raising a hand, and a strong breeze blowing across the waterfront. A weatherweaver, he thought, but he wasn’t surprised. His head was reeling from hearing the name of Octavio Pye. Octavio Pye! The dreaded Captain Krakeneater of the pirate ship Sea Roc!!!
There was a ladder built into the shide of the ship, and a dazed Ren was passed up this and onto the deck. The alchemist–Vushtek–scrambled up behind him.
Octavio Pye cast only a glance over Ren, but the look in his eyes as he did so, was, if not quite sympathetic, not unkind either. “Arn!†he called, and a burly young man about Ren’s age looked up from his task.
“Yes, sir?â€
“This is a new powder monkey. Show him to his quarters, and explain his duties.â€
“Aye aye, Captain.†Arn gave Ren a friendly nod. “Follow me,†he said.
By this time Ren had regained his wits, and followed Arn through a hatch and down a ladder.
“Quarters are pretty cramped already, and we’ve only got two powder monkeys, not including you, and one cabin boy, which is me,†said Arn. “I dunno how we’ll fit another, but I guess you’re pretty small, and we could always kick Tam out.â€
Ren found himself nodding in agreement, and then realized what Arn had said. “Who’s Tam? And why kick him out?â€
Arn made a face. “You’ll find out soon enough. Now, your duties…â€I know it’s considerably shortened and everything, but it’s also much better, don’t you think? Before we do the treasure room scene, I think we should put in a battle with the Navy and some shipboard life (you know, conversations among the younger members of the crew, etc.). Do you agree?
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Alice
in July 27th, 2008 @ 18:23You know what? Let’s make Arn a powder monkey too. They can sort of do the same thing cabin boys would do, except plus the powder monkey stuff. So it would be:
“…we’ve already got three powder monkeys, not including you,” said Arn.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 27th, 2008 @ 19:54Wow! This is so much better then it was when we was talking with Captain Pye! Plus, we get to know Arn better! AWESOME!
I love it! Hoo hoo! Goody! I like battles! But who is the third powder monkey?
Are we going to include some sections of Ren not exactly wanting to stay on the ship? We had that on the parts before. And, I mean, it makes sense because he didn’t exactly have a choice on whether he wanted to work on the ship or not.
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Alice
in July 27th, 2008 @ 20:1187-
1) I’m glad you like it.
2) You’ll see. We don’t need another character but I think we should put a few of them in there so not all of our characters get to go cavorting about getting killed/having adventures.
3) That’s what I’m doing right now.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 28th, 2008 @ 06:3888) Oh. OK then……..
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Alice
in July 28th, 2008 @ 11:19Here’s more!
Arn had just finished explaining Ren’s duties, which were more numerous than the latter had ever imagined, when a bell rang. Arn jumped up.
“Dinner,†he said. “Follow me.â€They collected their food and sat down at a rough wooden table, which Ren noted was nailed to the floor. Two boys were already sitting there, one, a small dark-haired child who could not have been over eleven, if that, and the other a tall, awkward, fair-haired youth with a miserable expression.
“Ren, this is Sev–†indicating the younger boy “–and this is Tam. Sev, Tam, this is Ren, the new powder monkey.â€
Sev looked up at Ren and grinned. “Nice to meet you,†he said.
“Likewise,†replied Ren politely.
Tam muttered something that may have been a greeting. Sev and Arn exchanged glances. Sev said something that sounded rather like “candles.†Arn seemed to understand, but Ren did not understand in the slightest.
“Candles?†he said with great confusion. Arn and Sev both nodded vigorously.
“Going out,†said Arn. “Never mind.â€
“Have you met Marmalade yet?†asked Sev, skilfully changing the subject.
“No,†said Ren, “who’s Marmalade?â€
“She’s the Captain’s Pukis,†Sev said.
Ren’s eyes widened. “A Pukis? Really?†Pukises were extremely rare, shapeshifting dragon-cats from the Free Isle of Lithuslov. Their fur was extremely rare and valuable, and though Ren had never seen one, it was rumored that the emperor had a score of them in golden cages.
“Really,†said Arn.
“She sinks ships,†added Sev. “Very useful in battle, you know.â€
This brought Ren back with a jolt. He was on a pirate ship. Pirates killed people, stole…they were worse than the Empire, and, as a boy who had grown up with Perlan Ethor, Ren had no very high regard for the Empire. He groaned, wishing he was back in Hermetopolis. Not that Hermetopolis was safe anymore, after they killed Perlan… He was suddenly awash in misery.
“What’s the matter?†asked Sev. “Homesick?â€We’re going to have to severely edit some stuff. Like the treasure room. I was thinking we could just RRRite up to the end of the battle scene, and then work on the treasure room scene. It could be several days that pass, just a few conversations, a battle (very important), some appearances of Pye…
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 28th, 2008 @ 20:50So, is this where Ren objects to being on the ship or something? I feel kind of weird writing because I don’t know what you’re thinking……..
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92
☸ Alice ☸
in July 28th, 2008 @ 23:2791- Yup.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 29th, 2008 @ 06:57OK! Now I shall write!
Oh, wait, have they even left the harbor yet?
—————————————
Ren shook his head stubbornly and stood up. “Wait just a moment! You people can’t just bring me onto your ship and force me into working on it! I refuse!”
Sev’s eyes grew large. He stood up, trying to quiet Ren. “Now, now.” he said “Don’t be so hasty….”
“HASTY?!” Ren shrieked. “I have my own home you know! My own life! You expect me to just drop that and join a group of murdering , thieving…….”
“Funny.” Arn interrupted.” I thought you were on the run from the empire.”
All thought of argument drained out of Ren and he returned heavily to his seat, the weight of his situation crashing down on him. Arn was right. Ren couldn’t return to his previous life. The death of his uncle had changed everything. He had no other place to go.
“Don’t worry!” Sev encouraged, obviously relieved that Ren had stopped shouting. “You’ll get used to it! It’s actually a rather good life!”
Sev babbled on and on. Ren eventually learned to drown the younger boy’s voice out to the point that it was simply background noise, like that of a fly buzzing in his ear. He glanced curiously at the boy Arn had called Tam. Tam was clearly antisocial. He had barely said anything the whole time that Ren had been there. Currently, he was staring at a nearby candle, as if there was something fascinating in the depths of it’s flame.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in July 30th, 2008 @ 06:30Looking at the boy, Ren could see why the others were not friendly with Tam. He never joined into their conversation and he held himself in an odd manner, as if he had a much higher status then that of a powdermonkey.
———————————-
Arg. I think Ren should try to talk to Tam, but I can’t think of anything to say right now.
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Alice
in August 2nd, 2008 @ 13:57No…This thread shall not die…
Has anyone noticed that Kiwi and I are the only steady posters on this thread? Even Meow has abandoned us… -reproachful stare-
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 2nd, 2008 @ 14:09Sorry.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 3rd, 2008 @ 06:19wow! You guys were up really late last night!
96) Tis OK.
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Alice
in August 3rd, 2008 @ 11:4397- That’s PM. It was only 11:57 AM for me and I think 5:09 (?) for TMFA.
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 3rd, 2008 @ 11:522:09. I’m MB time.
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Alice
in August 3rd, 2008 @ 13:5299- Really? I was under the impression that you lived in Connecticut.
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 3rd, 2008 @ 14:26100- I’ve lived in Iowa for the last year (Moved 7/29/08)
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102
The Man For Aeiou
in August 3rd, 2008 @ 14:34I mean 7/29/07
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 3rd, 2008 @ 14:34Oh! My bad! I didn’t see the pm!
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 4th, 2008 @ 06:32So………… erm………..yeah……….
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Alice
in August 4th, 2008 @ 18:39104- Yeah. Erm.
So…
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 4th, 2008 @ 19:14105) Wowsers! You said exactly what I said, except it was backwards!
Yah. I think Ren was going to try and talk to Tam…….
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Alice
in August 4th, 2008 @ 19:25106- Wow, I guess I did. It was only half-intentional.
He was, wasn’t he.
We could have spinach sauce.
-wanders off-
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 4th, 2008 @ 19:57Spinach sauce? Ummmmmmmmmmm…….
I do like cheese and spinach dip…… If that’s what you mean……..
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Alice
in August 4th, 2008 @ 20:01108- Spinach sauce can be quite good. It’s rather like pesto (particularly if you put basil in as well
). But we’re going out to Thai food instead.
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 4th, 2008 @ 23:10Yummy.
I like Spinch and mushrooms.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 5th, 2008 @ 05:57Ooooooooooooooooo. I don’t like mushrooms………. BUt the sauce sound delicious!
I think we are all very off topic though……..
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 5th, 2008 @ 18:46Oh No! I just thought, Alice is leaving for 2 WEEKS!
We’re all going to have to work very hard for this thread not to die! *is determined*
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Alice
in August 5th, 2008 @ 18:59112- Don’t worry. It’ll live. Because you know that the first thing I do when I get back is rush onto the computer and post on this thread. Indeed, I would be much obliged if you didn’t write too much while I was gone, because then there’ll be a lot to catch up on.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 6th, 2008 @ 08:02Oh. OK. Arg! She won’t be here to respond! Maybe we could write a little? If we can figure out how Ren should approach Tam? Any ideas? Maybe a little writing to start people off?
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115
Alice
in August 6th, 2008 @ 12:53114- ???
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 6th, 2008 @ 14:52You’re hear?!
Really? I thought you were leaving today! But you apparently aren’t! Tis a good thing!
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117
Alice
in August 6th, 2008 @ 16:52116- I shan’t leave till tomorrow morning. Early. As in, too early to be fully awake.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 7th, 2008 @ 08:17Oh. Bye then!
Hope you have a good trip! So, everyone who I just know is frequenting this thread, what now? I would really like to do something! Although, I don’t think we’ll have to worry about doing too much writing before Alice comes back. It’s always been a little slow here. What does everyone else think?
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119
The Man For Aeiou
in August 7th, 2008 @ 09:28I don’t know.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 8th, 2008 @ 07:50OK. I don’t know either.
Arg. *have reached a road block*
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 8th, 2008 @ 13:20You mean Writers (Or, in this case, Editor’s) Block.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 8th, 2008 @ 18:29Hmmmmmmm. Interesting point. They are both blocks though, except they have different meanings. Fascinating. The word “block” has a TON of different meanings!
*looks up in dictionary*
Awesome! mine has 13 different meanings!
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 8th, 2008 @ 18:44122- 12 in mine.
This is so off topic.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 8th, 2008 @ 19:07I know, right?
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 10th, 2008 @ 07:18OK. Well, I guess we really should get back on track. Alas, I have once more forgotten where we were. *looks back over posts* Ah! Yes! Ren was about to approach Tam. Erm…… well………I guess…….Arg. I can see why we went off topic.
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 10th, 2008 @ 11:05125- we’ve been of topic since post 107.
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127
Mogget's Little Sister (AKA Kyra [Pronounced KIR-rah])
in August 10th, 2008 @ 12:50*reappears*
Sorry! I’ve appeared to have given up on The Sea Roc! I’ll see what I can do to punish myself!.
*looks around on desk, sees leftover smoke balls from the 4th of July*
Yes! I shall light these on fire and smoke myself out of the house! *thinks* Wait, I’m not in my house! I’ll smoke my relatives out, too! *thinks of some other punishment* *ends up banging head against wall*
I shall see you soon, probably when I return home! I have a kitten on my lap! I love kittens!
*disappears*((That whole tirade’s gonna be on the “recent posts” thing!))
[The Recent Comments Gnome gnoticed and added a strategic period. –Admin.]
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 10th, 2008 @ 13:55Yay! You’re back! Perhaps you can help bring us out of the pit of randomness!
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Mogget's Little Sister (AKA Kyra [Pronounced KIR-rah])
in August 10th, 2008 @ 22:43127- Awwww.
128- Sorry, I’m of no help. I’m not at my home computer and thus I do not have my Microsoft Word copy of “The Sea Roc”. Again, sorry.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 12th, 2008 @ 09:20Aw.
But you can help us write? Right?
I shall write eventually, if no one else does.
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131
The Man For Aeiou
in August 12th, 2008 @ 15:05130-O.k.!
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 15th, 2008 @ 18:38Gurgle! OK. I guess I must…..
—————————————————–
Determined, Ren leaned toward the boy. “Hello. My name is Ren.” he said hesitantly.
“Yeah. I know.” Tam replied briskly, never taking his eyes off of the candle’s flame.
—————————————————-
Arg. This is hard. I really have no idea what to write.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 18th, 2008 @ 08:28Gurgle. Well, Alice should be coming back in a few days…… so…… that should be good……. I think everyone else is lurking……..
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 19th, 2008 @ 18:38You mean me?
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 20th, 2008 @ 06:37Yes, I think so. Unless there is anyone else lurking you hasn’t spoken up yet. Secretly, I hope above all hopes that there are approximately 15 people reading this thread and wondering if they should post but are just too shy. Whoever you are, PLEASE POST HERE!
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 20th, 2008 @ 21:21What is it will us a ships? we only keep these types of threads alive!
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137
kiwimuncher
in August 21st, 2008 @ 09:24136) What?
Sorry. But……… I don’t understand…..
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Alice
in August 21st, 2008 @ 11:27MLS, I know where you live.
No, seriously!
Well, not the street or house or anything, but the town.MWAHAHAHA!
But I don’t have anything to say right now. I’ll catch up later.
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kiwimuncher
in August 21st, 2008 @ 13:58Celebration! Alice is BACK!
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 21st, 2008 @ 14:53137- Ships log and this one.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 21st, 2008 @ 18:04136) No, I mean, your first sentence. I don’t understand it. But I think I know what you’re trying to say….. so……..
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 21st, 2008 @ 18:26141- forgot the nd in and.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points)
in August 22nd, 2008 @ 05:16142) Oh! OK! I get it!
THanks!
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144
Alice
in August 23rd, 2008 @ 13:50Please note:
Neither Ren nor Tam have any idea of their powers.
Tam is not yet fully unhinged. Or even half-unhinged. He may be a little strange and angsty, because he is Tam, after all, but he’s not crazy. Even while considering this, bear in mind that he’s had a Mysterious Past in which he was Not Happy.
And here I run into a wall that I hadn’t noticed earlier. (See how useful rewriting is?) If Tam was tormented by the Unknowables (did we decide on this?), then how could he not know of his power? Maybe he tried to block them or didn’t understand them or something. Whatever.132- I don’t think it’s very like Tam to “reply briskly.” Can I sort of rewrite that?
Determined, Ren leaned toward the boy. “Hello. My name is Ren.†he said hesitantly.
“Yeah. I know,†Tam replied, never taking his eyes off of the candle’s flame. Ren’s eyes followed his.
“What? It’s just a candle.”
Tam shrugged. “I like candles,” he said softly. The light flickered on his pale countenance.
Ren turned back to Sev and Arn, who looked at him gravely. “Is he all right?” Ren asked in a whisper.
“He’s not simple, if that’s what you mean,” Arn whispered back. “But he’s had an awfully hard life.”
‘How so?” Ren was intrigued.
“Won’t tell. He talks in his sleep, a bit, but we haven’t really heard anything beyond some mumblings about wanting to be left alone.”
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in August 23rd, 2008 @ 19:57144) Awesome!
Sev nodded in agreement to Arn’s words. “Yeah.” he said. “I tell you, Tam’s got a screw loose.”
Looking at Tam, still intent on staring at the candle’s flame, Ren could only agree. However, there was something about Tam, Ren didn’t know what, that made Ren like the boy. With this last conclusion, Ren left with the other boys to his new sleeping quarters.
—————————————
What time of day is it at this point in the story? If it’s not evening, we don’t have to have Ren leave for the forecastle. I just didn’t have any more ideas for ending that particular scene easily……
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146
Alice
in August 23rd, 2008 @ 20:12I don’t think it’s evening yet, so maybe…
Looking at Tam, still intent on staring at the candle’s flame, Ren could only agree. However, there was something about Tam, Ren didn’t know what, that made Ren like the boy. But Sev and Arn had moved on to other topics and Ren let himself be drawn back into the conversation until the meal had ended.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in August 24th, 2008 @ 08:12146) Thanks! That’s much better!
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peary moppins
in August 26th, 2008 @ 10:09Wow, you two are a good writers.
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149
Alice
in August 26th, 2008 @ 10:27148- Thanks.
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peary moppins
in August 26th, 2008 @ 10:37149) Is there a thread with the whole story posted on? I’ll go see…..
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151
Alice
in August 26th, 2008 @ 11:11150- Um. Yes. Sort of. Um… OK. (As you can see, I’m never sure how to start my explanation.)
Go to comment 25. Read everything until comment 28. That is the whole story. Then go to comment 43 and read until comment 65. You will get the general gist of where we want this story to go (I think) in the rewrite. You’ll see a lot of notes and a lot of them will confuse you, but you’ll probably learn quite a bit too.
Then go to comment 85 and read all the story bits. You don’t need to bother with the conversations about whether TMFA is on Eastern time and stuff.
I’m terribly sorry about the confusion, but there really isn’t any way around it.
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 26th, 2008 @ 17:35151- But that was a fun conversation.
Were are we in the story? I’m lost.
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Alice
in August 26th, 2008 @ 19:15152- Of course you’re lost. I can’t blame you. I get lost if I think about this thread too much.
Anyway, I will try to help you temporarily overcome your lost-ness (can’t promise anything more than that, sorry). Remember the bit in the very beginning where Ren learns that he’s been captured by Octavio Pye? Well, after that there are several dreadful pages which make me want to get swallowed up by a black hole (oddly enough, the majority of the story makes me feel that way…oh dear). We’re rewriting them.
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Alice
in August 26th, 2008 @ 19:26I’m not sure what to do next. The treasure room scene is after this, but I don’t know how to save that one. It’s vitally important, but at the same time impossible to fix without practically deleting it.
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 26th, 2008 @ 19:33153- O.K. Got it.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in August 26th, 2008 @ 20:31I thought we were going to add in some battles and like, you know, Ren doing powder monkey things. And then have him figure out his speacialness by himself. Of course, I don’t really know what to do with the treasure room scene either. Perhaps I’m just trying to prolong the inevitable.
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Alice
in August 26th, 2008 @ 21:45156- You’re right on the first point, but I’m pretty dreadful at battle scenes and none of the sea-battles I’ve seen in movies really involved cannon* at all. I think that the powder monkeys would just run back and forth from the powder barrels to the cannon* and give the people in charge of firing the cannon the powder, and repeat as necessary. But I’m not positive. Do the powder monkeys load the powder themselves, or give it to a superior to load? Do any of ye faithful writers know? Do any of ye Admired GAPAs know? Fiddler would know, but she’s computerless.
*Cannon is the plural of cannon, right?
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Alice
in August 26th, 2008 @ 22:13Oh, I forgot to mention, I don’t think Ren finds out his magicalness on his own. I rather like the thought of Octavio Pye having a private talk with him, in which he tells him of his power, and maybe even shows him the Orb of Centaur*, but maybe not. Which gave me a wonderful idea. Who needs the treasure room scene? We can have a lovely battle, in which we demonstrate Marmalade’s Pukis-ness and the Krakeneater’s charismatic pirate-ness. From there, we have two options:
1) Slow option. Return to more ship-life, continue developing characters.
2) Fast-paced option. Immediately go on to execute the PLAN.The PLAN:
Sometime during the course of a battle, or after a battle, or something, Ren has a very odd experience with fire. This shouldn’t be hard, considering his job. The Captain has a nice, private chat with him about his power, may or may not tell him about the Orb of Centaur. This covers some of the treasure-room scene. There are two options as to how we will deal with informing our audience of the Captain’s political plans:
1) A fellow crew-member tells it to Ren.
2) We show Octavio Pye discussing it with his first mate. This has the advantage of also dealing with the Orb.
3) (Yes, I lied.) Ren and Arn and/or Sev (or neither) overhear the Captain. If we used this option, we could also have this be the way that Ren finds out about his powers, but I don’t like it as much because a) Captain Pye is a good and beloved captain, and also just a bit formidable, so I don’t really think the boys would attempt to listen at his keyhole, and he wouldn’t discuss it on deck or something, and b) I feel that we need to have some interaction with Octavio. He’s the best character, I think, or he has the potential to be the best character, with a sense of humor and an aura of having everything under control**, sort of a wise mentor figure.
What we pick depends almost entirely on how many characters we want. TMFA said we had too many. I sort of agree. We’ve got an omnipotent narrator here, and we’ve gone overboard on the omnipotence. Maybe if we refrained from showing anyone’s POV but, say, Ren’s, Tam’s, Octavio’s, and Alexis’s, then we’d be OK? TMFA? What do you think?*Why Centaur? This is fire we’re talking about, and centaurs strike me as decidedly more of the earth power.
**But he needs weaknesses. What are his weaknesses?
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peary moppins
in August 27th, 2008 @ 09:54151) Errmm…..thanks.
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Alice
in August 27th, 2008 @ 10:52159- Sorry.
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peary moppins
in August 27th, 2008 @ 12:24160) No, it’s ok. I don’t think I could have explained it.
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Alice
in August 27th, 2008 @ 13:06161- In some RRRs/RPWs we made everyone read all the previous threads. Maybe it isn’t surprising that they died.
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The Man For Aeiou
in August 27th, 2008 @ 21:56162- maybe.
158- Good plan! I’d say 2.
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kiwimuncher
in August 28th, 2008 @ 06:40158) Arg. Well, I would liek to say 2 as well. The only problem is that Ren HAS to know something of the Orb because that’s why they later convinced the pirates of the Wavebreaker to take them to the Bloodstorm in order to steal the real Orb. I’m not saying that Ren must know EVERYTHING about the Orb. I mean, he could just simply know that it was important enough for Captain Pye that it was kept hidden and that the actual thing was on the Bloodstorm. And perhaps he feels drawn to it or something. Perhaps mention of it slips into the conversation when they’re talking about Ren’s powers and Octivio gets mad at Ren for asking about it or something like that. (actually, that might be a good way to end the scene. maybe) I don’t really know……
ARg. I don’t know. I don’t think we really have too many characters. bUt, if you guys want to change it, I’m good.
Hmmmmmmm. you’re right. Centaurs are more earthy. But the name still has a ring to it……
Weaknesses? Well, he showed a little weakness in the jail cell on the Bloodstorm…… I don’t really know though…….
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 1st, 2008 @ 08:17Yeah. So…………..
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Alice
in September 1st, 2008 @ 09:57164- Oh, yes, of course he has to learn about it at some point.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 1st, 2008 @ 16:08So…………. I guess we might want to have a sea battle soon.
Since everyone seems clueless powder monkey wise, I have done a little research!
1. powder monkeys were boys who fetched gunpowder from a ships magazine for a gun crew. Boys were used because they weren’t strong enough to lift the heavy cannons.
2. A powder monkey had to be fast on his feet (yay we got that right! ) to run across the ship and back in so short a time to be efficient.
3. Twas a dangerous business. Often, boys were killed by the cartridges they were carrying. (stray spark ignites, Kaboom)
4.The wage was much like that of a young factory worker of farmhand, about 7 pounds a year.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 6th, 2008 @ 08:23Hello? *pouts* fine.
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Alice
in September 6th, 2008 @ 11:18168- I haven’t been posting much at all, what with SCHOOL and all that. It’s the weekend now but I still have homework, not to mention housesitting. So yeah. Sorry.
167- That’s splendid. I think a lot of our boys are too old to be powder monkeys, but whatever.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 7th, 2008 @ 20:07169) Yeah. I know what you mean. Bleh.
Really? how old are they? I thought they were most likely around 14- 15 – 16. Around there. That’s not too old is it? How many normal teens around that age do you know that could pick up a heavy cannon to load and fire? I stress normal.
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Alice
in September 7th, 2008 @ 20:36170-
Ren is 14
Tam is 16
Arn is 14/15
Sev is 10/11Powder monkeys were really young. Sev is about the right age, but the others are a little old. The powder monkeys didn’t fire a cannon, they just ran back and forth with the powder. But hey, maybe in Sphaere they start older.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 8th, 2008 @ 20:26Yeah. And maybe they’re kind of scrawny, at least Tam is anyway.
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Alice
in September 8th, 2008 @ 21:23172- I don’t think Tam is scrawny, so much as sort of gangly and awkward. Ren is small, though. Arn is neither awkward not small.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 10th, 2008 @ 20:11Well, that kind of fits for them right? Except for Arn……. but he’s younger then Ren and Tam, so that works out.
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Alice
in September 10th, 2008 @ 22:23174- Not younger than Ren.
But whatever.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 11th, 2008 @ 19:32Oops.
Sorry. Forgot. So, I guess we’d better continue writing!
I think we’ve successfully been putting it off lately!
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 14th, 2008 @ 19:12OK. So, the last time we wrote was post 145. There, they had just finished their meal and……. what? Do we want to continue to a part after Ren’s first meal or do we want to skip ahead in time? I suppose that Ren must go through some training or something. I also read somewhere that while not in battle, powder monkeys typically did other menial jobs around a ship to get money for food and a cot. So…….. yeah…….. I really couldn’t find all that much.
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Alice
in September 14th, 2008 @ 20:37177- Ah! I thought they must do other stuff. These kids are sort of like cabin boy/powder monkey crossovers.
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kiwimuncher
in September 15th, 2008 @ 14:34178) Yes, i was thinking the same thing. But powder monkeys are so much cooler then cabin boys.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 20th, 2008 @ 08:50OK, so, we were doing really good and then we stopped writing for some reason, so……. yeah…….
By the way, where is TMFA?
He hasn’t been around this thread for a while now. So, OK, I guess Ren is going to start his training now. Perhaps we could kind of skip over that part by saying, “Sometime in the near future” or something like that. And then we could include another happy crew scene that then…… *rubs hands together* A battle scene?
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The Man For Aeiou
in September 20th, 2008 @ 16:52I couldn’t thinl off any thing to say.
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kiwimuncher
in September 22nd, 2008 @ 06:59181) Oh, that’s OK, I was just making shure you were still here.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 27th, 2008 @ 09:03I was thinking about what Alice said in post 158. I like the idea that something happens during the battle that is abnormal with Ren and fire. I can’t decide whether I’m for immediately executing Alice’s PLAN or for returning to normal ship life for a while.
I mean, we don’t want it to go TOO fast. But I don’t know, it doesn’t make sense to me that if Captain Pye had an idea about who Ren was after the battle, why he wouldn’t do SOMETHING about it. Maybe he wasn’t exactly sure of something and he wanted to make sure before he approached Ren? Maybe. I don’t know. What do yall think?
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in September 27th, 2008 @ 09:05Sorry, but I was thinking again….. about something I said.
Why should Captain Pye approach Ren? He didn’t approach Tam.
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Alice
in September 27th, 2008 @ 14:44184- True. But…what if Ren approached him?
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kiwimuncher
in September 29th, 2008 @ 15:16185) *gasp* Revelation!
Now THAT’S an idea!
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in October 4th, 2008 @ 09:09OK, so now we have a battle and during the battle something weird occurs with Ren and fire. Then, Ren decides that Captain Pye knows something……. somehow….. and Ren asks him about it.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in October 18th, 2008 @ 20:48Wowsers. I haven’t been on here in a while. Gosh a golly, it’s gotten slow. I really should be getting to bed though…… *looks at clock guiltily* Well, I am alive, just to let yall know.
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The Man For Aeiou
in October 22nd, 2008 @ 19:19I’m here too. *Yawns*
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Alice
in October 22nd, 2008 @ 20:14I’m here as well.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in October 28th, 2008 @ 09:10No school today! So now I can do something productive here!
OK! So, pretty much, we’re waiting for a battle scene! *rubs hands together* (What? It’s cold *shiver*) And no one wants to write it. I shall now attempt to MAKE my self write it! *is determined*
I don’t really know if we want to continue from where we left off, the boys finishing their meal, but I’ll go ahead and do a time jump to a battle cause I don’t know of anything else to do right now…. But if you guys could think of anything………… yeah. OK.
A silent moon shimmered on the horizon. Ren strained his ears, listening for any sound other then the creaking hull of the Searoc and the lapping of the waves against her sides. He dared not even to breathe as he glanced around at his companions. To his left was Arn, a serious frown upon his face, and to his right was Seth, who, for once, had given his voice a rest. Ren glanced over his shoulder at Tam, who, of all the boys, appeared the most relaxed. For some reason that Ren could not decipher, Tam had always been most at home in the storeroom, amongst the flameable weapons. In answer to Ren’s gaze, Tam produced a calm smile, which Ren reflected rather timidly.
After all of the times that Ren had participated in these escapades, he had never fully gotten used to them. The suspense tried on his nerves, leaving him constantly on edge.Well, I guess that’s not much of a start. but, it’s something. And I was trying to make it sound like Tam and Ren had become kind of friends. What do you guys think. I would write more but…… I should most likely get sme homework done. *sigh*
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in October 28th, 2008 @ 19:22OK! I’m back!
Suddenly, the air whistled around them. All four boys jumped up in anticipation as the first contact was made. Screams rent the air as the Searoc shuddered violently and reeled as if it had been struck. Not even pausing for an instant Ren picked up several cannon-balls and ran out of the storage room. Around him, the deck of the Searoc was plagued with the chaos of battle. Ren blotted out the roar of the scene before him and focused solely on his mission, to get to the cannons. Time slowed as he ran across the deck. Adrenaline pumped through his veins as he neared the cannon line. Wordlessly, he handed the cannon-balls to the nearest men and raced back to the store rooms.
How’s that so far? Is that kind of correct?
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Alice
in October 28th, 2008 @ 20:51Kiwi- Actually, it’s Sev, not Seth. But close.
191- Excellent.
192- Close. But Ren would carry powder, not cannon balls.
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kiwimuncher
in October 29th, 2008 @ 06:47Oh. OK.
Thanks!
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kiwimuncher
in October 31st, 2008 @ 14:56Happy Halloween everybody!
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kiwimuncher
in November 14th, 2008 @ 14:59Hello…… I really have been checking this, I just haven’t had time to respond……..
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in November 14th, 2008 @ 23:17Hey, how are all my Sea Roc buds?
Sorry I quit. Fantasy isn’t my thing anymore, you know?
Yeah, so, sorry again. Say hi to Ren and Tam for me!
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kiwimuncher
in November 19th, 2008 @ 15:22197) Hi!
I am doing quite well. So, I guess………. OK. Yeah…… *feels awkward*
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Alice
in November 19th, 2008 @ 23:5097- Oh. OK.
Writing isn’t really my thing anymore, fantasy or otherwise, but I’m not about to abandon it now. Well, not officially, anyway. I have sort of abandoned it at this point, haven’t I? The very real and very lame excuse I will now give is this:
I have been very busy with a play and school and stuff but now my schedule’s back to normal, at east until the winter play, so maybe I’ll be back.
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The Man For Aeiou
in November 24th, 2008 @ 16:21hi.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in November 24th, 2008 @ 19:56199) No, I understand. I’ve been the same way. Especially this week.
Now that I’ve turned in that GIGORMOUS project in Env. Science, it’s like a pack of elephants has been lifted from off my back. (ooo….. that was a pretty cool comparison wasn’t it? *wiggle eyebrows*) So, now I’m BACK! Until school starts agian…… Although, technnicallly, I still have school tomorrow. So I’m celebrating early…… Anyways……… You don’t like writing anymore? But you’re so good at it! *is stricken*200) Hiya!
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in November 24th, 2008 @ 19:57Whoah. That razz smilie was not supposed to come up.
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kiwimuncher (2 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in November 26th, 2008 @ 12:54YAY! HOLIDAY!
I will write sometime on this break….. sometime……… yeah. Does anyone have any main ideas for how Ren’s incident with fire is going to occur? (I thought that just a stay spark or something will ignite some of Ren’s powder as he’s carrying it and…… then I’ve got nothin after that. What do you guys think?) Or are we going to wait more before we get to into it?
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in November 28th, 2008 @ 19:01Typing fingers are ready! Any ideas?
I guess I’ll just type something and you guys can tell me what you think. (I guess I should for you guys to respond, *is guilty* but I’m in the mood and……. yeah) Unless we want to draw out the beginning more. In which we might need a group input. I really don’t care on this issue.
——————————————————–As Ren reached the storage room door, the Searoc lurched wildly. With a cry, Ren lost his footing and slammed into the oncoming wall. Smoke clogged his vision and Ren looked up, wincing, to see flames devouring the elegant hull of an emperial trading ship.
“Need some help?” offered a voice beside him.
Ren glanced toward the voice and smiled when he saw Tam, who was extending his hand to him. Ren smiled gratefully and took Tam’s hand. In that instant, Tam disappeared into the smokey haze, but not before Ren saw the manic flickering of the fire in his eyes. Without another thought, Ren followed after him.
The need for gun powder was limitless. Ren quickly developed a film of sweat over his skin from his endless marathon. However, his endeavers were paying off. Slowly, yet surely, the merchant ship was falling into their hands.
Ren could see the cannon line in the distance. With an extra burst of speed, Ren sped across the ship, a heap of gun powder held securely in his hands. It was only out of the corner of his eye that he glimpsed a stray spark creep toward him. He barely had a second to react before the spark reached his precious cargo.
Ren screamed as the his powder ignited. A shockwave resonated off of the mass, sending Ren flying for several yards. For a moment, Ren lay on his back on the ships rolling floor. I should be dead. he thought. He cracked his eyes open nervously and immediately gasped. His hands contained a bright, flaming bundle. Ren’s mind reeled. My hands are on fire. But I feel nothing. I should be DEAD! All thoughts fled from his mind and Ren fell into a dead faint.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in November 30th, 2008 @ 13:19what do you guys think? Was that OK?!
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Alice Returns!
in December 1st, 2008 @ 22:58Oh, oh, I must fix the sailing things in this novel… Anyway.
204- -wince- -shudder- (No offense, it’s just that I’ve been reading Patrick O’Brian and have a vague notion of how ships work.) The only really important problem in that piece is that if the powder ignited the ship with go up—BANG CRASH KABOOM and there are just some smoking spars in the water.
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kiwimuncher
in December 3rd, 2008 @ 06:51hmmmmmmmmmmm. OH well. Twas just an idea. Although, perhaps it was ren’s firey-ness that stopped the explosion?
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in December 21st, 2008 @ 19:38Merry Christmas everyone!
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in December 21st, 2008 @ 19:59So I was wondering what you thought we should do about that scene Alice.
Or what you think we should change…..
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Alice
in December 21st, 2008 @ 22:36Hello! I’m going to learn Elvish! -excited-
Anyway, to get down to business… -rereads scene- Ohhh, I get it now! It’s just the gunpowder he’s holding that explodes, not the entire supply. But still. The charges are in linen bags, not loose. But it’ll work. We can fix the little problems later. Let’s just leave it be for now.He came to, minutes or perhaps hours later, laying on the gun deck in a pool of blood. He jumped to his feet, horrified, and ran his hands over his body before he realized that the blood was not his own. Around him, sailors were dragging the dead and wounded away. The battle was over. And here was Arn, hurrying over with Sev in his wake, and there was Tam, standing aloof as usual, staring vacantly into the air. Ren knew that if he had been closer he could have seen the flames dancing in Tam’s eyes, even when there was no fire to be reflected.
“Ren, Ren!” shrilled Sev. “What happened?”
Arn’s expression was graver, his face pale underneath the soot . “Tam says your charge exploded,” he said.
“It did,” said Ren. ‘Or…I thought it did.”
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in December 22nd, 2008 @ 08:12“It’s amazing you’re still alive!” Sev exclaimed in awe.
Ren nodded slowly, his memory returning to him in confuddled flashes. Could his mind possibly be playing tricks on him?
Arn gasped, snapping Ren out of his abstraction. “Your hands!” Arn cried in alarm. Ren glanced absentmindedly at his palms and exhaled in shock. Through the thick layer of soot that covered his hands, bloody gashes could be seen on his skin.
“We have to get you to the infirmary immediately!” Arn declared. “If it gets infected…..”
Ren nodded agreeably and allowed himself to be led away by his friend. Glancing over his shoulder, he met the gaze of Tam, who was watching him with an unnerving gaze. Something told Ren that he had a lot of explaining to do once he escaped from the ship’s doctor.
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Alice
in December 22nd, 2008 @ 12:48211- -blinkblink- You, my friend, have read too much Harry Potter and not enough Patrick O’Brian. Your assignment: read Master and Commander. If that fails, at least watch the movie.
The “infirmary” of which you speak, would, firstly, not be called an infirmary. I don’t actually know what it would be called. Sick berth? No, that’s where you go once you’re all bandaged up… Stephen Maturin did all that stuff in the cockpit, so we’ll just go with that.
Secondly, a few cuts on a boy’s hands would in no way take precedence over the missing arms and legs and fatal wounds that the doctor would have to deal with. That’s not to say Ren wouldn’t go, but he’d be there for hours.Oh, who cares?
~~~
Hours later, Ren emerged from the cockpit, very much shaken, with bandages wrapped around his palms.
~~~
Just thought of something. The characters always have to be doing something. On a ship, no one just sits around. And no, they can’t just scrub the deck constantly.The starlings are making something of a Raven-in-Flight image on the snow. It’s very exciting.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in December 23rd, 2008 @ 08:39212) My bad.
I really know nothing about ships. I think it would be better if I just researched ship life. I think I actually tried to read that book one time and I couldn’t get into it. *wince* By the time I’d gotten half way through it, the pages had begun to swirl together. Maybe I should have stuck with it. I usually do, but I was tempted by other books and…… yeah…… *is guilty*
I wish I had snow here. Our daffodils are starting to come up and the bluebirds and robins have come back. So, I guess there’s not much of a chance we’ll get any.
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Alice Uskglass, the Starling Queen
in December 23rd, 2008 @ 12:45213- I know. It’s actually really kind of hard to read. I found the first sentence in the “Sticks and Stones” section of the Bulwer-Lytton fiction contest site, with a word count of 152. But I like a challenge, to the extent that I actually read the sequel and would have gone further if I’d been able to find the third.
Daffodils and robins? In DECEMBER??? It’s hardly wi8nter yet, much less SPRING??
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in December 23rd, 2008 @ 12:53My research has been successful!
And I’ve figured out that our characters don’t ALWAYS have to be doing work. A ship will have about 2 watches, so, when it’s not their watch, they can sit back and relax.
I found a really good site, and I don’t know if the GAPA’s will let me show you it……. but….. I’ll try anyways…..
It’s http://www.beyondthemap.ca[OK to the link! — Rosanne]
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in December 23rd, 2008 @ 13:06Yay!
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in December 23rd, 2008 @ 13:13214) Oh!
Oops! I didn’t see your post…….I know. It’s ridiculous how springy it is here. It’s NEVER like this.
In fact, I just noticed several early blooming bushes going into flower. They usually don’t open until late March. SCARINESS!
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Alice
in December 24th, 2008 @ 00:20215- Good point. I’d forgotten about that.
Detail on Watches to Improve our Nautical Writings:
Noon-4 PM: Afternoon watch
4 PM-6 PM: First dog watch
6 PM-8 PM: Second dog watch
8 PM-Midnight: First watch
Midnight-4 AM: Middle watch/Midwatch
4 AM-8 AM: Morning watch
8 AM-Noon: Forenoon watchBells:
The bell is rung every half hour, for example, 12:00 is one bell, 2:30 two bells, 1:00 three bells, and so on. After eight bells the watch changes and it starts over.I recently got a book called The Way of a Ship, which has a deck and sail plan of a late nineteenth century commercial square rigger, which is obviously different from our dear Sea Roc, but similar enough. It’s very useful.
Should we map out who’s on what watch so we can be somewhat reasonable about whether or not people are working when others are free?
On second thought, let’s assume that the Sea Roc actually has six or seven powder monkeys, but the others are on a different watch or something. Because if these kids aren’t on the same watch, they wouldn’t eat together or anything and would never get to talk to each other.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in December 24th, 2008 @ 12:21That sounds good to me!
Would we really need to know who’s on what watch? I mean, we don’t really talk about any of the specific crew members except for the boys, Captain Pye, and the wind workers. So…….. The boys are all on the same watches, Captain Pye is kind of….. well, the Captain, and the wind-workers shouldn’t be a problem with working around. They would most likely switch back and forth since there are 2 of them. Right?
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in January 1st, 2009 @ 10:51Hmmmmmmmm. I guess we should try to write more. Maybe later……
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in January 9th, 2009 @ 19:05Oh gosh. I guess I never came back. *sigh* Too bad it’s exam time. YOu know, after exams there are lots of days in which I have no school. *wiggles eyebrows*
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in January 14th, 2009 @ 09:39w00t! No school! Now it’s the time for some analyzing of text!
So, where were we? Ren coming out of the……. what is the medical area called?……… with bandages on his hands……..
————————————————————–
He felt a pang of emptiness and vaguely recalled that he had not eaten since before the raid. Suddenly ravenous, Ren jogged toward the ship’s kitchen. He was stopped, however, by the ringing of the bell for the next watch. Ren turned reluctantly. His stomache would just have to wait.
Ren ran down to the main deck and joined the rest of his watch as they went about their various duties. He spotted Tam grab some sponges to scrub the decks and Ren bent to join him. He knew that Tam would want to know of everything that had transpired during the battle.
“Ren! Come on up here!” came a friendly voice. Arn motioned for Ren to climb the ropes and join him. Ren met eyes with Tam, promising in one look that he would explain later and scrambled up toward Arn. The older boy smiled warmly as Ren approached and motioned to a set of ropes that needed tightening.
“I’m really glad that you weren’t too badly hurt during the battle, Ren.” Arn said absently, while tying a complicated looking knot. “Sev makes me nervous sometimes when we’re up here. He’s just so inexperienced. And Tam just creeps me out.”
Both boys moved farther up the mast, tightening and loosening the ropes when it was needed. “So, how was the raid?” Ren asked curiously.
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Alice
in January 17th, 2009 @ 16:53222-
a) You couldn’t just go to the kitchen and get food. You have to wait for mealtimes.
b) Don’t call it a raid. That’s on land. I think it would just be called a battle. Or do you mean like when they boarded the other ship and stuff? Being pirates and all.
c) Not sponges. Holystones. I don’t know if they’re actually stones, though.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in January 18th, 2009 @ 12:48223)
a) Are you sure? He couldn’t just go in there and get his rations?
b) Yeah, I mean when they boarded the enemy ship. What is that called? I’m not sure…….
c) Holystones? AWESOME!
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Alice
in January 18th, 2009 @ 19:09224-
a) Positive.
b) Er…boarding? Or something? You could say “boarding party”, I guess.
c) And in The Stolen Lake, there’s a guy named Mr. Holystone, only… [spoilers]
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in January 19th, 2009 @ 09:57225) c-Only…. you don’t scrub the deck with him?
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Alice
in January 19th, 2009 @ 17:55226- No, only…
STOLEN LAKE SPOILER WARNING.
He’s actually King Arthur.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in January 20th, 2009 @ 06:54227) Oh. OK. I don’t know what book that is anyways………. So that’ OK.
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in January 22nd, 2009 @ 00:26Crud. I need to get back into this. Fortunately, I have a day off of school on Friday… soooo… I’ll try to change my extremely outdated copy and keep it in ship shape (get it? Pun… ha ha ha.)
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kiwimuncher
in January 22nd, 2009 @ 12:26229) heh heh.
Hiya! How’re you?
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Alice
in January 25th, 2009 @ 14:23Kiwi- I’m going to sort of rewrite your last post. I don’t think they’d be working on lines like that…but they could be patching a sail.
He felt a pang of emptiness and vaguely recalled that he had not eaten since before the raid. Suddenly ravenous, Ren jogged toward the ship’s kitchen. He was stopped, however, by the ringing of the bell for the next watch. Ren turned reluctantly. His stomache would just have to wait.
Ren ran down to the main deck and joined the rest of his watch as they went about their various duties. He spotted Tam grab some sponges to scrub the decks and Ren bent to join him. He knew that Tam would want to know of everything that had transpired during the battle.
“Ren! Come help over here!†came a friendly voice. Arn and several other crew members were patching a sail. Arn motioned for Ren to come over. Ren met eyes with Tam, promising in one look that he would explain later.
The older boy smiled warmly as Ren approached and handed him a needle.
“I’m really glad that you weren’t too badly hurt during the battle, Ren.†Arn said absently, re-threading his own needle. “Sev makes me nervous sometimes when we’re up here. He’s just so young. And Tam just creeps me out.â€
Ren nodded, piecing together the canvas with clumsy stitches. “So, how was the rest of the battle?†he asked. “I mean, after…y’know.”
“It was great,” said Arn. “And there’s heaps of money–not that we’ll get much of it, but it’s some, at least.”
Ren nodded. They sat in companionable silence for a while.
“Did your charge really explode?” Arn burst out suddenly.
“Yes,” said Ren. “At least, I think so.”
Arn nodded and looked away, out to the horizon. “Tam’s charge exploded once,” he said. “Back when he was pretty new, like you. He wasn’t injured either.”
“I’m injured,” said Ren, not sure what else to say. He was thinking of that mad fire flickering in Tam’s eyes, and the look of pure joy on Tam’s face. He shuddered.
Arn didn’t seem to notice. “You’re not injured much,” he said. “Not half as bad as most people are when a pound of gunpowder blows up in their hands. I’ve seen three powder monkeys die when their charge exploded, and one more who got burned so bad he was blind when his wounds healed. You and Tam are the only two people I’ve ever seen come through that unscathed.”
Ren said nothing, and the rest of the watch passed in silence.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in January 26th, 2009 @ 11:59231) OKey dokey! Me likes!
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in February 2nd, 2009 @ 21:40“Ren…” muttered Arn as they tiptoed along the dark deck. Starlight danced on the surface of the ocean. “This is a bad idea.”
“I have to know,” said Ren firmly. “You have the candle?”
Arn removed his hand from where it was cupped around the flame, and the light sprang up, revealing the boys’ expressions: Arn, grim, Ren, solemn and vaguely frightened.
Ren screwed his eyes shut and extended his hand. “Do it,” he said bravely.
Arn looked from Ren to the candle, and back again. “Ren,” he said. “It was probably just a fluke. I’m not going to set you on fire. I can’t.” He turned to go.
Ren reached out and snatched the candle. It guttered in the draft created by the sudden movement, and then flared up, brighter than ever, as Tam appeared, horror in his pale face.
“Don’t!” he cried hoarsely, and lunged at the candle, clapping his hands over the flame, extinguishing it. He howled in agony, cries quite disproportionate to the injuries inflicted by a tiny candle-flame, and Ren himself felt a tremor of pain and intense fear as Tam collapsed, sobbing, on the deck.
There were shouts from the watch, who had been alerted by Tam’s cries, and then Octavio Pye was there, towering over the sailors, demanding to know what had happened. Ren and Arn exchanged glances. “Well,” Ren started.
“We were going for a walk,” put in Arn.
“I couldn’t sleep,” said Ren, “and I went for a walk and found Arn. so we were walking around and Tam came up and he surprised us, so…” there he ran out of inspiration and foundered. Arn came to his aid.
“And he surprised us, so I dropped my candle, only he caught it before it started a fire, and it burned him.”
Ren nodded vigorously in confirmation. Captain Pye’s eyes narrowed. “Take Eizid to his berth,” he ordered Arn. “You,” he said to Ren, “come with me. And you lot” (this directed at the sailors on watch) “get back to your duties.”
Ren followed the captain reluctantly. Since his first day of capture, months ago, he had never once been directly spoken to by the captain, and he liked it that way. Pirates were just like anyone else, if a bit rougher and coarser and more prone to bloodshed than the majority of Hermitopolans, but Octavio Pye was different. Before Ren had full taken in his situation, he was standing in the cabin of Captain Pye, the Krakeneater. Appropriately enough, there was a half-eaten plate of kraken calamari sitting on the table. the Captain took a seat, but he did not offer one to Ren, and the boy was too frightened to ask for one himself, so he remained standing.
“Ren Splayr,” said Captain Pye. “Tell me the entire story, from the beginning. That’s an order,” he added, when Ren tried to protest.
“Yes, sir,” said Ren timidly. “During the last battle, my charge exploded.”
Octavio raised his eyes. “Did it now,” he said, with interest. “Continue.”
“It exploded. But I wasn’t hurt–not much at least. And Arn said how everyone died when their charge exploded, except me and Tam. And then I remembered one time when I was little and I stuck my hand in the fire, and didn’t hurt, and then Perlan got all serious and I heard him talking to my aunt about it, and I can’t remember what they said, but anyway–” he paused for breath, aware that he was babbling, and nearly apologized, but the Captain was looking interested and serious, so he went on. “Anyway, I thought maybe it had something to do with fire, so I wanted to stick my hand in a fire again, and see what happened.” Here the Captain drew a sharp breath, and Ren stopped again. “Sir?”
“You are far too bright for your own good, boy. But go on.”
“But Arn wouldn’t light my bandages, so I was going to do it, only Tam came up and snuffed the candle. It seemed to hurt him a lot more than it ought,” he added, puzzled.
The Captain had pushed away his calamari, and was pulling maps out and unrolling them. “You said your uncle knows?” he asked.
“Knows what, sir?”
The Captain sighed, and let the map roll back up on itself. “Ren Splayr, there are two people in the world who are like you, and you are one of them. You know of stormmasters and alchemists, of course, who can control the elements.”
“Of course, sir. But I’m not one. Not a very powerful one, anyway.”
“No. You are infinitely more rare. Your talent is not that of water or wind or earth–yours is fire.”
This did not have the impact that Octavio had expected. Ren continued to stand there, looking confused. “But sir,” he said, “there isn’t a fire talent.”
“There is,” said the Captain. “As I said, there are only two people in all of Sphaere who have that power. The Empire knows of only one, and they have heard rumors of a second, which is you, but they certainly don’t spread the knowledge. I too had heard rumors of a second fire powerful, but I didn’t expect it to be you, a stray and an orphan in the streets of Hermetopolis!”
Ren was too confused to mind being called a stray. “You said there were two. Who’s the other one?”
The Captain shook his head. “That is for me to know. Leave now. And don’t tell anyone what I have told you, understand? No one.”
Ren nodded and fled the premises.
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Alice
in February 3rd, 2009 @ 09:11Octavio sighed, staring at the place where the boy had been. Two years ago, he might of thought of this as an extraordinary piece of good luck. Both fire powerfuls here, under his very nose! But he had had too much trouble with the Empire, and the boy Tam exasperated him.
–more later, I have to leave!–
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Alice
in February 3rd, 2009 @ 18:36I had tons of ideas earlier, but they’ve all gone, so I’ll go back to my treasure hunt.
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Alice
in February 5th, 2009 @ 15:58Octavio sighed, staring at the place where the boy had been. Two years ago, he might of thought of this as an extraordinary piece of good luck. Both fire powerfuls here, under his very nose! But he had had too much trouble with the Empire, and the boy Tam exasperated him. Still, it was better he had the boys, troublesome though they may be, than the Empire have either one of them. They would give him a remarkable advantage, provided the Empire didn’t know of them. If the Splayr boy’s uncle had suspected his nephew’s power, if he had told the Empire… but the lad had been running, he had nearly been killed. The Empire couldn’t know; they wouldn’t risk wounding such a valuable asset. Octavio took another deep breath and rolled up the map. They would go to Lithuslov as planned, and the Empire would never follow them there. All was well.
OK, now let’s see. I think we can go back to what’s already been written?
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in February 7th, 2009 @ 15:16Here’s the story so far (rewritten/edited):
The Inner Sea had formed hundreds of years before, when the lowland flats in the
center of Sphaere had been deluged constantly as the Age of Ice ended and the great glaciers melted. Now, the only land surface of Sphaere is the mountains around its shores.
The Sanguiz Empire soon took advantage of the confusion caused by the Deluge to expand its territory from the handful of states it once commanded. As our story opens, all of Sphaere is under its iron grip.
That is, almost all.
Hardy bands of seafarers, disgusted with the decadence and corruption that infects Sphaere, have taken to the Inner Sea and the scattering of lawless isles in its center. They raid the prosperous, Empire-sanctioned merchant ships that cross the Sea and bamboozle the incompetent navy.
One ship in particular is notable among these: The Sea Roc.Ren Splayr dashed down the narrow alley, the loose soles of his sandals flapping on its damp bricks. The whistles of the soldiers weren’t far behind. Ren hoped he could get to the seafront before they caught him and he went the same way as his uncle. Perlan Ethor, Ren’s only remaining family, had taken him in when his mother died and his father disappeared. Now Perlan was gone too, shot by the captain of the guard for writing an article about corruption in the Sanguiz Empire. Funny how a few strokes of ink in the Hermetopolis Gazette could translate into a puff of alchemical smoke, a flying musket ball, and death. Ren was wanted too, simply for knowing Perlan and “possible aiding and abetting propaganda against our glorious Emperor Sanguinus IX.”
Ren’s only hope was to stow away aboard a merchant ship bound for the opposite side of Sphaere, all the way across the Inner Sea.
“Where are you running to, boy?” said a gruff voice, and Ren looked up into the eyes of a man. Probably a sailor of high rank, to judge by his clothes. Maybe even a captain. He wore a very large and ridiculous three-cornered hat. In spite of his present state, Ren wanted to laugh, but there was no time. He dodged the man, and sped off down the alley again.
Octavio Pye watched the boy go. Limber, agile, small for his age of maybe fourteen… he would make a good powder monkey. Why was he in such a hurry?
A bunch of officious-looking people in the uniforms of Imperial soldiers rushed down the alley after the boy. Octavio was experienced at looking as though he had no idea what was going on. The guards didn’t question him.
So the boy is in trouble with the Sanguiz Empire, Octavio mused. I think he won’t refuse a job aboard the Sea Roc.
He turned and took one of the many shortcuts he knew to the harbor.Ren ran on, his heart pounding in his chest, his breath coming ragged. He reached the harbor, and looked wildly from side to side for a place to hide. The soldiers were gaining, and there was nowhere to go.
Nowhere except the stinking black water of the harbor.
One of the soldiers, a lean, athletic one, pulled ahead, raising his musket to his shoulder. Ren leaped into the sea, hearing the bullet whiz over his head.
With a loud sploosh, the water closed over him. He fought to get to the surface, flailing wildly. When he reached it, though, he almost wished he hadn’t. Three soldiers were pointing guns at him, and looked like they intended to use them.
There were three loud cracks, and Ren cringed, expecting to feel the bullets smashing into his chest. But they didn’t. He looked up to see the soldiers clutching their injured hands, their unfired muskets on the ground beside them.
What happened? thought Ren. The soldiers were pushed out of the way as a man with a long beard and a green robe pulled him out of the water with a grip as strong as a lion’s. The man, judging by his appearance was an alchemist, maybe a doctor. “Come on! We must hurry! These soldiers will recover and call for reinforcements very soon.” Ren had no choice but to follow the alchemist through the crowds of people, hoping that wherever he was going, it was somewhere safe.
The alchemist stopped in front of a small three-masted ship moored at an out-of-the-way corner of the dock.
“Vushtek!” came a cry from on board. “You found him!”
“Yes, and I’m being pursued. Let me up, quick!”
A head poked over the rail. It was the man from the alley. “If they catch up to you, they’ll be sorry they messed with the crew of Octavio Pye. Tzil? Niria? I need a wind.”
Ren dimly noticed a man in blue and white clothing raising a hand, and a strong breeze blowing across the waterfront. A weatherweaver, he thought, but he wasn’t surprised. His head was reeling from hearing the name of Octavio Pye. Octavio Pye! The dreaded Captain Krakeneater of the pirate ship Sea Roc!!!
There was a ladder built into the shide of the ship, and a dazed Ren was passed up this and onto the deck. The alchemist–Vushtek–scrambled up behind him.
Octavio Pye cast only a glance over Ren, but the look in his eyes as he did so, was, if not quite sympathetic, not unkind either. “Arn!†he called, and a burly young man about Ren’s age looked up from his task.
“Yes, sir?â€
“This is a new powder monkey. Show him to his quarters, and explain his duties.â€
“Aye aye, Captain.†Arn gave Ren a friendly nod. “Follow me,†he said.
By this time Ren had regained his wits, and followed Arn through a hatch and down a ladder.
“Quarters are pretty cramped already, and we’ve only got three powder monkeys, not including you,†said Arn. “I dunno how we’ll fit another, but I guess you’re pretty small, and we could always kick Tam out.â€
Ren found himself nodding in agreement, and then realized what Arn had said. “Who’s Tam? And why kick him out?â€
Arn made a face. “You’ll find out soon enough. Now, your duties…â€Arn had just finished explaining Ren’s duties, which were more numerous than the latter had ever imagined, when a bell rang. Arn jumped up.
“Dinner,†he said. “Follow me.â€They collected their food and sat down at a rough wooden table, which Ren noted was nailed to the floor. Two boys were already sitting there, one, a small dark-haired child who could not have been over eleven, if that, and the other a tall, awkward, fair-haired youth with a miserable expression.
“Ren, this is Sev–†indicating the younger boy “–and this is Tam. Sev, Tam, this is Ren, the new powder monkey.â€
Sev looked up at Ren and grinned. “Nice to meet you,†he said.
“Likewise,†replied Ren politely.
Tam muttered something that may have been a greeting. Sev and Arn exchanged glances. Sev said something that sounded rather like “candles.†Arn seemed to understand, but Ren did not understand in the slightest.
“Candles?†he said with great confusion. Arn and Sev both nodded vigorously.
“Going out,†said Arn. “Never mind.â€
“Have you met Marmalade yet?†asked Sev, skilfully changing the subject.
“No,†said Ren, “who’s Marmalade?â€
“She’s the Captain’s Pukis,†Sev said.
Ren’s eyes widened. “A Pukis? Really?†Pukises were extremely rare, shapeshifting dragon-cats from the Free Isle of Lithuslov. Their fur was extremely rare and valuable, and though Ren had never seen one, it was rumored that the emperor had a score of them in golden cages.
“Really,†said Arn.
“She sinks ships,†added Sev. “Very useful in battle, you know.â€
This brought Ren back with a jolt. He was on a pirate ship. Pirates killed people, stole…they were worse than the Empire, and, as a boy who had grown up with Perlan Ethor, Ren had no very high regard for the Empire. He groaned, wishing he was back in Hermetopolis. Not that Hermetopolis was safe anymore, after they killed Perlan… He was suddenly awash in misery.
“What’s the matter?†asked Sev. “Homesick?â€
Ren shook his head stubbornly and stood up. “Wait just a moment! You people can’t just bring me onto your ship and force me into working on it! I refuse!â€
Sev’s eyes grew large. He stood up, trying to quiet Ren. “Now, now,†he said. “Don’t be so hasty…â€
“HASTY!†Ren shrieked. “I have my own home you know! My own life! You expect me to just drop that and join a group of murdering, thieving…â€
“Funny,†Arn interrupted.†I thought you were on the run from the empire.â€
All thought of argument drained out of Ren and he returned heavily to his seat, the weight of his situation crashing down on him. Arn was right. Ren couldn’t return to his previous life. The death of his uncle had changed everything. He had no other place to go.
“Don’t worry!†Sev encouraged, obviously relieved that Ren had stopped shouting. “You’ll get used to it! It’s actually a rather good life!â€
Sev babbled on and on. Ren eventually learned to drown the younger boy’s voice out to the point that it was simply background noise, like that of a fly buzzing in his ear. He glanced curiously at the boy Arn had called Tam. Tam was clearly antisocial. He had barely said anything the whole time that Ren had been there. Currently, he was staring at a nearby candle, as if there was something fascinating in the depths of its flame.
Looking at the boy, Ren could see why the others were not friendly with Tam. He never joined into their conversation and he held himself in an odd manner, as if he had a much higher status then that of a powder monkey.
Determined, Ren leaned toward the boy. “Hello. My name is Ren,†he said hesitantly.
“Yeah. I know,†Tam replied, never taking his eyes off of the candle’s flame. Ren’s eyes followed his.
“What? It’s just a candle.â€
Tam shrugged. “I like candles,†he said softly. The light flickered on his pale countenance.
Ren turned back to Sev and Arn, who looked at him gravely. “Is he all right?†Ren asked in a whisper.
“He’s not simple, if that’s what you mean,†Arn whispered back. “But he’s had an awfully hard life.â€
‘How so?†Ren was intrigued.
“Won’t tell. He talks in his sleep, a bit, but we haven’t really heard anything beyond some mumblings about wanting to be left alone.â€
Sev nodded in agreement to Arn’s words. “Yeah,†he said. “I tell you, Tam’s got a screw loose.â€
Looking at Tam, still intent on staring at the candle’s flame, Ren could only agree. However, there was something about Tam, Ren didn’t know what, that made Ren like the boy. But Sev and Arn had moved on to other topics and Ren let himself be drawn back into the conversation until the meal had ended.A silent moon shimmered on the horizon. Ren strained his ears, listening for any sound other then the creaking hull of the Searoc and the lapping of the waves against her sides. He dared not even to breathe as he glanced around at his companions. To his left was Arn, a serious frown upon his face, and to his right was Seth, who, for once, had given his voice a rest. Ren glanced over his shoulder at Tam, who, of all the boys, appeared the most relaxed. For some reason that Ren could not decipher, Tam had always been most at home in the storeroom, amongst the flameable weapons. In answer to Ren’s gaze, Tam produced a calm smile, which Ren reflected rather timidly.
After all of the times that Ren had participated in these escapades, he had never fully gotten used to them. The suspense tried on his nerves, leaving him constantly on edge.
Suddenly, the air whistled around them. All four boys jumped up in anticipation as the first contact was made. Screams rent the air as the Searoc shuddered violently and reeled as if it had been struck. Not even pausing for an instant Ren picked up several cannon-balls and ran out of the storage room. Around him, the deck of the Searoc was plagued with the chaos of battle. Ren blotted out the roar of the scene before him and focused solely on his mission, to get to the cannons. Time slowed as he ran across the deck. Adrenaline pumped through his veins as he neared the cannon line. Wordlessly, he handed the cartridges to the nearest men and raced back to the store rooms.
As Ren reached the storage room door, the Searoc lurched wildly. With a cry, Ren lost his footing and slammed into the oncoming wall. Smoke clogged his vision and Ren looked up, wincing, to see flames devouring the elegant hull of an emperial trading ship.
“Need some help?†offered a voice beside him.
Ren glanced toward the voice and smiled when he saw Tam, who was extending his hand to him. Ren smiled gratefully and took Tam’s hand. In that instant, Tam disappeared into the smokey haze, but not before Ren saw the manic flickering of the fire in his eyes. Without another thought, Ren followed after him.
The need for gun powder was limitless. Ren quickly developed a film of sweat over his skin from his endless marathon. However, his endeavers were paying off. Slowly, yet surely, the merchant ship was falling into their hands.
Ren could see the cannon line in the distance. With an extra burst of speed, Ren sped across the ship, a heap of gun powder held securely in his hands. It was only out of the corner of his eye that he glimpsed a stray spark creep toward him. He barely had a second to react before the spark reached his precious cargo.
Ren screamed as the his powder ignited. A shockwave resonated off of the mass, sending Ren flying for several yards. For a moment, Ren lay on his back on the ships rolling floor. I should be dead. he thought. He cracked his eyes open nervously and immediately gasped. His hands contained a bright, flaming bundle. Ren’s mind reeled. My hands are on fire. But I feel nothing. I should be DEAD! All thoughts fled from his mind and Ren fell into a dead faint.
He came to, minutes or perhaps hours later, laying on the gun deck in a pool of blood. He jumped to his feet, horrified, and ran his hands over his body before he realized that the blood was not his own. Around him, sailors were dragging the dead and wounded away. The battle was over. And here was Arn, hurrying over with Sev in his wake, and there was Tam, standing aloof as usual, staring vacantly into the air. Ren knew that if he had been closer he could have seen the flames dancing in Tam’s eyes, even when there was no fire to be reflected.
“Ren, Ren!†shrilled Sev. “What happened?â€
Arn’s expression was graver, his face pale underneath the soot . “Tam says your charge exploded,†he said.
“It did,†said Ren. ‘Or…I thought it did.â€
“It’s amazing you’re still alive!†Sev exclaimed in awe.
Ren nodded slowly, his memory returning to him in confuddled flashes. Could his mind possibly be playing tricks on him?
Arn gasped, snapping Ren out of his abstraction. “Your hands!†Arn cried in alarm. Ren glanced absentmindedly at his palms and exhaled in shock. Through the thick layer of soot that covered his hands, bloody gashes could be seen on his skin.
“We have to get you to the infirmary immediately!†Arn declared. “If it gets infected…..â€
Ren nodded agreeably and allowed himself to be led away by his friend. Glancing over his shoulder, he met the gaze of Tam, who was watching him with an unnerving gaze. Something told Ren that he had a lot of explaining to do once he escaped from the ship’s doctor.
Hours later, Ren emerged from the cockpit, very much shaken, with bandages wrapped around his palms.
He felt a pang of emptiness and vaguely recalled that he had not eaten since before the raid. Suddenly ravenous, Ren jogged toward the ship’s kitchen. He was stopped, however, by the ringing of the bell for the next watch. Ren turned reluctantly. His stomache would just have to wait.
Ren ran down to the main deck and joined the rest of his watch as they went about their various duties. He spotted Tam grab some sponges to scrub the decks and Ren bent to join him. He knew that Tam would want to know of everything that had transpired during the battle.
“Ren! Come help over here!†came a friendly voice. Arn and several other crew members were patching a sail. Arn motioned for Ren to come over. Ren met eyes with Tam, promising in one look that he would explain later.
The older boy smiled warmly as Ren approached and handed him a needle.
“I’m really glad that you weren’t too badly hurt during the battle, Ren.†Arn said absently, re-threading his own needle. “Sev makes me nervous sometimes when we’re up here. He’s just so young. And Tam just creeps me out.â€
Ren nodded, piecing together the canvas with clumsy stitches. “So, how was the rest of the battle?†he asked. “I mean, after…y’know.â€
“It was great,†said Arn. “And there’s heaps of money–not that we’ll get much of it, but it’s some, at least.â€
Ren nodded. They sat in companionable silence for a while.
“Did your charge really explode?†Arn burst out suddenly.
“Yes,†said Ren. “At least, I think so.â€
Arn nodded and looked away, out to the horizon. “Tam’s charge exploded once,†he said. “Back when he was pretty new, like you. He wasn’t injured either.â€
“I’m injured,†said Ren, not sure what else to say. He was thinking of that mad fire flickering in Tam’s eyes, and the look of pure joy on Tam’s face. He shuddered.
Arn didn’t seem to notice. “You’re not injured much,†he said. “Not half as bad as most people are when a pound of gunpowder blows up in their hands. I’ve seen three powder monkeys die when their charge exploded, and one more who got burned so bad he was blind when his wounds healed. You and Tam are the only two people I’ve ever seen come through that unscathed.â€
Ren said nothing, and the rest of the watch passed in silence.“Ren…†muttered Arn as they tiptoed along the dark deck. Starlight danced on the surface of the ocean. “This is a bad idea.â€
“I have to know,†said Ren firmly. “You have the candle?â€
Arn removed his hand from where it was cupped around the flame, and the light sprang up, revealing the boys’ expressions: Arn, grim, Ren, solemn and vaguely frightened.
Ren screwed his eyes shut and extended his hand. “Do it,†he said bravely.
Arn looked from Ren to the candle, and back again. “Ren,†he said. “It was probably just a fluke. I’m not going to set you on fire. I can’t.†He turned to go.
Ren reached out and snatched the candle. It guttered in the draft created by the sudden movement, and then flared up, brighter than ever, as Tam appeared, horror in his pale face.
“Don’t!†he cried hoarsely, and lunged at the candle, clapping his hands over the flame, extinguishing it. He howled in agony, cries quite disproportionate to the injuries inflicted by a tiny candle-flame, and Ren himself felt a tremor of pain and intense fear as Tam collapsed, sobbing, on the deck.
There were shouts from the watch, who had been alerted by Tam’s cries, and then Octavio Pye was there, towering over the sailors, demanding to know what had happened. Ren and Arn exchanged glances. “Well,†Ren started.
“We were going for a walk,†put in Arn.
“I couldn’t sleep,†said Ren, “and I went for a walk and found Arn. so we were walking around and Tam came up and he surprised us, so…†there he ran out of inspiration and foundered. Arn came to his aid.
“And he surprised us, so I dropped my candle, only he caught it before it started a fire, and it burned him.â€
Ren nodded vigorously in confirmation. Captain Pye’s eyes narrowed. “Take Eizid to his berth,†he ordered Arn. “You,†he said to Ren, “come with me. And you lot†(this directed at the sailors on watch) “get back to your duties.â€
Ren followed the captain reluctantly. Since his first day of capture, months ago, he had never once been directly spoken to by the captain, and he liked it that way. Pirates were just like anyone else, if a bit rougher and coarser and more prone to bloodshed than the majority of Hermitopolans, but Octavio Pye was different. Before Ren had full taken in his situation, he was standing in the cabin of Captain Pye, the Krakeneater. Appropriately enough, there was a half-eaten plate of kraken calamari sitting on the table. the Captain took a seat, but he did not offer one to Ren, and the boy was too frightened to ask for one himself, so he remained standing.
“Ren Splayr,†said Captain Pye. “Tell me the entire story, from the beginning. That’s an order,†he added, when Ren tried to protest.
“Yes, sir,†said Ren timidly. “During the last battle, my charge exploded.â€
Octavio raised his eyes. “Did it now,†he said, with interest. “Continue.â€
“It exploded. But I wasn’t hurt–not much at least. And Arn said how everyone died when their charge exploded, except me and Tam. And then I remembered one time when I was little and I stuck my hand in the fire, and didn’t hurt, and then Perlan got all serious and I heard him talking to my aunt about it, and I can’t remember what they said, but anyway–†he paused for breath, aware that he was babbling, and nearly apologized, but the Captain was looking interested and serious, so he went on. “Anyway, I thought maybe it had something to do with fire, so I wanted to stick my hand in a fire again, and see what happened.†Here the Captain drew a sharp breath, and Ren stopped again. “Sir?â€
“You are far too bright for your own good, boy. But go on.â€
“But Arn wouldn’t light my bandages, so I was going to do it, only Tam came up and snuffed the candle. It seemed to hurt him a lot more than it ought,†he added, puzzled.
The Captain had pushed away his calamari, and was pulling maps out and unrolling them. “You said your uncle knows?†he asked.
“Knows what, sir?â€
The Captain sighed, and let the map roll back up on itself. “Ren Splayr, there are two people in the world who are like you, and you are one of them. You know of stormmasters and alchemists, of course, who can control the elements.â€
“Of course, sir. But I’m not one. Not a very powerful one, anyway.â€
“No. You are infinitely more rare. Your talent is not that of water or wind or earth–yours is fire.â€
This did not have the impact that Octavio had expected. Ren continued to stand there, looking confused. “But sir,†he said, “there isn’t a fire talent.â€
“There is,†said the Captain. “As I said, there are only two people in all of Sphaere who have that power. The Empire knows of only one, and they have heard rumors of a second, which is you, but they certainly don’t spread the knowledge. I too had heard rumors of a second fire powerful, but I didn’t expect it to be you, a stray and an orphan in the streets of Hermetopolis!â€
Ren was too confused to mind being called a stray. “You said there were two. Who’s the other one?â€
The Captain shook his head. “That is for me to know. Leave now. And don’t tell anyone what I have told you, understand? No one.â€
Ren nodded and fled the premises.
Octavio sighed, staring at the place where the boy had been. Two years ago, he might of thought of this as an extraordinary piece of good luck. Both fire powerfuls here, under his very nose! But he had had too much trouble with the Empire, and the boy Tam exasperated him. Still, it was better he had the boys, troublesome though they may be, than the Empire have either one of them. They would give him a remarkable advantage, provided the Empire didn’t know of them. If the Splayr boy’s uncle had suspected his nephew’s power, if he had told the Empire… but the lad had been running, he had nearly been killed. The Empire couldn’t know; they wouldn’t risk wounding such a valuable asset. Octavio took another deep breath and rolled up the map. They would go to Lithuslov as planned, and the Empire would never follow them there. All was well.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in February 7th, 2009 @ 20:21OMG! That was such an awesome idea!
Sorry I haven’t been around much lately. I’ve been really crazy lately with school stuff.
How exactly will this part hook up with what we’ve already written? Or has it already hooked up? *is too lazy to check*
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in February 28th, 2009 @ 20:37Well hello again! I am back after an unfortunate time of major school stuff. And I’m still having major school stuff. I’m just ignoring it right now. *is guilty* But that’s OK, because apparently yall have had the same problem! So no worries!
So….. let me see…… Alice had just written a totally awesome piece of writing and I was wondering if we were going to hook it up to our original writing or if it already was hooking up. Of course, we might not want to hook it up. What do yall want to do? It doesn’t matter to me……..
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in March 4th, 2009 @ 22:15239- I find it rather amusing that you say “yall” as though you were addressing multiple persons, when really the only people who come here are you and me. So yes, I do intend to hook it up, but I haven’t gotten around to doing so yet, and I’m not going to get around to doing it tonight either, because I have to practice my violin before bed.
Anyway, we can hook it up but we’re going to have to edit extremely and do some more rewriting once we’ve done so.
Anyway, like I said. Violin.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in March 7th, 2009 @ 19:39Well, there’s always a hope that someone else is viewing this thread besides us. I’m sure that there are just a ton of people that visit this thread quite often, they’re just too shy to join the discussion! *tries to be optimistic and almost fails, almost*
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in March 9th, 2009 @ 18:28241- No doubt.
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in March 13th, 2009 @ 20:00The days passed with monotonous regularity. Ren avoided Arn, and Tam avoided Ren. Arn watched both Tam and Ren with a dubious aloofness, and Sev remained perfectly oblivious that anything had occurred at all.
It was some days after Ren’s attempted experiment and the subsequent talk with the Captain, that Ren awoke feeling something was wrong. The storm blew out of the south with unbelievable fury and suddenness. Massive towers of cloud piled up in the sky, crowned by lightning.
“Tzil! Niria! I need you on deck!†bellowed the Captain. “We have to quell the storm!â€
Tzil Azuro, the ship’s weatherweaver, rushed up, followed by a young woman of about twenty years. “We’ll do our best, Captain,†said the woman, “but there’s something wrong about these waves…â€
Tzil licked his finger and raised it up. Small strands of lightning seemed to crackle across the tip. “Niria’s right,†he said urgently. “This is a made storm.â€
“Can you quell it?†the captain asked.
“Well… together, Niria and I are a match for any lone stormmaster on the Inner Sea, but this one must have been sent by a confederation of twenty, possibly more. We need to find a safe harbor, and fast.â€
The captain considered for a moment, and then began barking orders. “All sails up, crew! Niria, make sure the waves don’t swamp us. Tzil, keep the wind to a moderate level so the canvas doesn’t burst. We’re going to ride this storm out until we can reach the isle of Lithuslov. We’re not far now.â€
Ren stood still as confusion immediately fell upon the ship, and the crew ran every-which-way, not sure what they were supposed to be doing. He wondered where Lithuslov was. He vaguely remembered learning about the Free Isles in school, but that had been three years ago, and the teacher had hurried over the subject. They were “uninhabited,” that is, inhabited by rebels and pirates–the very sort of people Ren now spent every moment of his life.
Lightning cracked, and Ren started as an idea struck him. He ran up to the captain. “Sir, could I help the stormmasters? You said I had talent, and lightning–â€
Octavio Pye cut him off. “Ask them.”
Ren trotted up to Tzil and Niria, standing with closed eyes in the middle of the hustle and bustle. “Could I help?†he asked, reluctant to disturb them.
Niria opened her eyes. “What?”
“I said, could I help?” repeated Ren. “The Captain says I’ve got power–not this kind of power, fire power but lightning’s sort of fire isn’t it?” he finished hurriedly.
Tzil and Niria exchanged glances, half amused, half frustrated. “So this is the Captain’s new prodigy,” said Niria. “I knew something was up.”
“We haven’t got time for this,” said Tzil, then turning to Ren: “Look, you’re untrained and I don’t know your powers anyway, so maybe you can deal with lightning, maybe you can’t. I appreciate the offer, but we don’t have time right now.” He closed his eyes and went back to muttering spells.
“Sorry,” added Niria, before following suit.
“I understand,” muttered Ren, and picked his way across the tossing, sloping deck.
A colossal wave, driven by the mad wind, mounted ahead. The Sea Roc was lifted up by the wave and flung through the air like a toy. Tzil and Niria rose into the air, wreathed in glittering chains of electricity. Ren managed to grab hold of a bulwark and prevent himself from being swept away. Tam Eizid was not so lucky. The older boy was smashed off the deck by a freezing, gray plume of water. Several seabirds rode its crest, screaming triumphantly.
“Stormy petrels,†Captain Pye muttered. Then he shouted, “Throw Tam a line!†Another wave broke over the deck, making him cough and splutter. He knew the chances of saving Tam were virtually nil, but he had to try.
“It’s no good, Captain,†Tzil said. His voice rang like a bell through the clamor of the storm, even though he didn’t raise his voice. “I recognized those petrels. One of them had a scar above its eye.â€
“How does a petrel get a scar like that??â€
“I put it there. Those aren’t petrels, they’re wave spirits, and they’re in the service of Rake Vashkar, weatherweaver of the Blood Storm.â€
Soon the storm began to clear, leaving with the petrels. Captain Pye went down below, and the crew hurried around, trying to clean up the mess left by the storm. Ren stood on the deck, shocked and sad. He had never even got a chance to meet Tam properly, and now he was dead- or captured by the Sanguiz Empire.
Tzil and Niria were asleep down below, tired out by their efforts to quell the storm. Captain Pye was doing who knows what in his cabin. Ren was all alone.Tam kept his head above water for as long as he could, and eventually the storm quieted. He floated on his back, watching petrels that shouldn’t be there flying above him. Every now and then one would seem to lose shape for a moment, only to resume the form of a petrel a little later. Tam’s head swam, and he realized his limbs were all numb. He wouldn’t survive much longer in this cold.
Then a ship loomed above him. Tam gave a weak yell and attempted to swim out of the way. His frozen legs would hardly obey him. Someone on the ship shouted something, and then down came a rope, whistling through the air from the very high deck of the ship. Tam grabbed it, and was hauled up onto the ship.
“What is it?†asked a voice, accompanied by hurried footsteps.
“Found a boy in the water, sir. ‘E’s half dead.â€
“A boy? Really?†The voice seemed much too interested, and not in a good way. “Where do you imagine he came from?â€
“I don’t know, sir. But he looks like pirate-kind to me.â€
“A pirate! Ah! Bring him to my cabin!â€
“Yes, Mr. Vashkar, sir,†said the seaman, and then Tam lost his senses, and heard no more.Ren leaned over the edge of the ship, watching the waves from the storm get smaller and smaller, only creating small splashes now, and thinking of Tam’s inevitable death. He’d never liked Tam much, but he felt curiously alone now that he was gone. Suddenly there was a shout, and he turned around , almost tangling himself in a net crumpled up by his feet. Someone was standing on the quarterdeck, shouting.
I’ll do more editing later.
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in March 14th, 2009 @ 14:39“What in the name of -†Captain Pye stormed out of his cabin, but was stopped mid-step when he saw what was going on.
The ship’s Pukis, Marmalade, stood on the deck in dragon form, hissing furiously and spitting fire. Across from it lay a motionless stormy petrel.
Tzil, who seemed to have materialized from nowhere, strode over to the creature. He kicked Marmalade to the side, cursing under his breath. Marmalade spat a small ball of fire at him, then turned back into a kitten and ran over to Octavio Pye, who stroked her absentmindedly. “Tzil!!” he cried. “Is that…?”
Tzil examined the bird, noting the red feather on its right wing and the scar over its left eye. “Yes, sir,” he replied. “It’s a wave spirit, all right.”
Octavio nodded. “Bring it to my cabin. Where’s Niria?”
“Here, sir,” announced the girl, seeming, like Tzil, to appear from nowhere.
“Good,” said the captain. He dislodged Marmalade from his shoulder and led the way into his cabin, followed by Niria. Tzil brought up the rear with the petrel-spirit.
Inside the cabin, Pye swept a pile of papers off his desk and motioned that Tzil should deposit the spirit there, which he proceeded to do, none too gently.
“Letor,†whispered Tzil, bending towards the spirit and prodding it with one long finger. “Letor! Wake up, I command you!â€
The petrel-spirit stirred, feebly waved one wing, and opened its eyes. Seeing Tzil, it suddenly made a frantic motion to get away. Papers fluttered to the floor.
“Where are they?†Tzil demanded, seizing Letor around the feathery body and shaking. Letor made a cry of pain.
Tzil shook him again. “Where are they taking the boy?â€
Letor attempted to twist his petrel features into a puzzled look and failed.
“I know they have him,†spat Tzil. “That’s why Vashkar sent the storm. He’s tried it before. Now where are they taking him?â€
Letor spoke for the first time. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.â€
“We’ve done battle before, Letor,†said Tam. “You left me for dead. I’ve no qualms about doing the same to you, only I won’t leave time to finish the job!” He tightened his grip. “You’re very small, bird. And very weak.”
“Fine, fine! I’ll tell you!†gasped Letor. “They are going to Helean City, where Mordran is preparing for the fight of all Sphaere!â€
Octavio Pye swore. “I should have known they’d make a move,” he muttered to himself.
“The boy. Is there anything…different about him?†Tzil continued his interrogation.
“What…boy?”
“The boy they’ve kidnapped! Tam Eizid! Who else?”
Letor remained stubbornly silent. Tam’s hand moved to the long, sharp knife at his side.
“He’s bait,” said Letor quickly. “He’s a favorite of yours, isn’t he, Captain? You won’t just let him die, will you?â€
Niria, Tzil, and Octavio exchanged glances.
“We’ll have to dispose of the bird,” said Pye. “We can’t let him go back to Vashkar.”
“I could kill him, sir,” said Tzil, a wild light in his eyes.
“Tzil,” said the captain warningly.
Niria stepped forward and murmured some words. Letor looked balefully at her. Niria smiled maliciously back.
“He can’t change shape now,” she said. “Or talk, for that matter. At least not until I release him.”
“That’s good,” said Pye. “Tzil, you may put him in that cage.” He indicated a highly ornate golden birdcage hanging from a beam. “Now I can keep an eye on him.”
Tzil obeyed, glaring, and sat down, at the Captain’s request.
“I don’t believe for one instant that story about Tam being bait,” said Niria. “No one can have any cause to believe that that boy is a favorite.”
Octavio Pye shrugged again. “But it works,” he said. “We can’t let him die, and we can’t let the Empire keep him. So he does serve as bait, even if he serves another purpose as well.”
“Do you think they know, then?” said Tzil.
“Of course they know. This isn’t the first time they’ve tried to kidnap him, remember.”
“Well, what can we do?”
“We’ll have to rescue him. But first,” added the Captain, stopping Niria, who was about to make an indignant observation. “First, we’ll refresh at Lithuslov. Our retreat from Hermetopolis was quicker than expected, and we need fresh water and fresh fruit. Lithuslov is only a day’s sail from here, and from there we can head to Helean City to rescue the boy.”
This decision having been made, the stormmasters dispersed, and the captain bent himself to the task if gathering up the papers that had been spilled in the interview.Here’s a thought! In order to minimize characters, maybe Tzil can be first mate, as well as chief stormmaster.
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in March 14th, 2009 @ 17:46Tam woke in a dark room. It was a few minutes before he realized that his hands were tied to the sides of the hard, wooden chair he was sitting on. An alchemical lamp, a crystal globe filled with phlogiston, shone blindingly into his face. As a result, the features of the man sitting across from him were unclear. The voice, however, was anything but. It cut through his throbbing head like a knife.
“Hello, Tam Eizid.â€
“Who are you?†Tam rasped. “How do you know my name?â€
“My faithful spirits have been following the Sea Roc for several weeks. The only reason we haven’t attacked it is that we didn’t want to damage you.â€
Tam blinked and squinted, trying desperately to get a good look at the speaker.
“Tell me, Tam. Are you happy aboard the Sea Roc?â€
The boy hesitated. “No-ooo,” he said at last, “but I’m happier than I was before.”
“I could get you a job aboard the Blood Storm. Any position, even first mate. Wages of up to ten aurums a day, luxurious lodgings- oh, anything you desire.â€
Tam snorted. It sounded like a good deal, but these things always did at first, and he wasn’t sure he trusted this silver-tongued stranger. “What’s the catch?â€
“We want you to do us a favor.â€
“What is that?â€
The man reached into a deep pocket and pulled out a small, golden globe, engraved with images of all the lands of Sphaere. It gleamed in the light from the phlogiston lamp, but also seemed to produce a more subtle light from within.
“We want you to use this in the service of Emperor Sanguinus IX.â€
“Ah…†said Tam. His head hurt, and he couldn’t think clearly. Everyone had told him not to trust the Empire, ever since he could remember. But… “Can I think about it?” he asked.
“Sure, sure… take as much time as you want…just remember the Blood Storm is waiting for you.†And with that the man stood and left the cabin.
Tam rested his head against the wall. It looked brand new, unlike the wood of the Sea Roc, which still held up well, but was starting to show signs of weathering, and always seemed damp. He did not trust the strange man, however intriguing his offer was. Something about his spirit and the Sea Roc…and the emperor.
Two years ago, Tam had stowed away on an exploring ship, heading out of Sphaere. Halfway across the Inner Sea, the Sea Roc had attacked them. Tam, who had remained hidden for weeks, was discovered by the first mate. Given the choice between death and a job aboard the pirate ship, Tam chose the obvious. He was made cabin boy, but was strangely unused to work, and that along with his strange manner had set the crew against him. But the pirates, even Octavio Pye, knew nothing of his past. Tam had managed to mostly forget it himself, too, and that was all that mattered.OK, I’m already seeing problems. This piece, as well as other, later ones, shows that Tam, although troubled, is still relatively sane or at least lucid, which is something we neglected to work into our little addition. Remind me that we’ve got to change that in our next edit.
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in March 14th, 2009 @ 18:09Eh, problems. I’ll change a few of those sentences.
“My faithful spirits have been following the Sea Roc for several weeks. The only reason we haven’t attacked it is that we didn’t want to damage you. You are an extremely valuable young man, Eizid. Do you know of your powers?â€
Tam blinked and squinted, trying desperately to get a good look at the speaker. He did know of his powers, though he had tried to forget.
“Tell me, Tam. Are you happy aboard the Sea Roc?â€â€œWe want you to use this orb in the service of Emperor Sanguinus IX.â€
Tam had been trained, in those two years, never to trust the emperor or any of his minions. Which was why he was reluctant to take the offer. But what would happen if he refused?
“Hello!†An imperious -and female- voice broke through his reverie. “Vashkar! Are you in there?â€
Tam said nothing, but tried to remember if he had ever heard the name Vashkar before.
“Vashkar!†repeated the voice. “I want to go swimming. You must warm up the water for me.†When there was still no reply, the owner of the voice marched into the cabin. “It’s awfully dark in here,†she complained, and another phlogiston lamp flared up.
“Oh!†said the girl. She was about Tam’s age, with brown hair down to her lower back, and her features were ominously familiar. The emperor’s features, but softer and more girlish.
“Who are you?†Tam asked, trying to leap to his feet, before remembering that he was tied to a chair.
“I could ask the same to you,†the girl hissed. “What are you doing in here? It’s PRIVATE. So leave.†She put her hands on her hips and looked much like Marmalade when she was disturbed from her rest.
“I’m in here because I don’t exactly have a choice,” said Tam. “And you?â€
“I’m here to keep all these stupid men in check and to stop them from caring for stowaways,†she snapped. “In other words, you.â€
“I’m not a stowaway!†said Tam hotly. “I’m a powder monkey!â€
“We already have fifteen of them. We don’t need another.â€
“I’m not a powder monkey here. On my ship.â€
“Well then, what are you doing here?â€
“I was washed overboard and this ship picked me up. Now leave me alone.â€
“What’s your ship’s name?†asked the girl.
“Why should I tell you?â€
“Because I am your superior. I am the fourth child of Emperor Sanguinus IX.â€
“Even less reason to tell you!†Tam shot back before he could stop himself. “Now leave me alone, for the last time.â€
“Even less…†mused the fourth child of Emperor Sanguinus IX. She looked at Tam suspiciously. “Who are you, exactly?â€
“Tam Eizid, cabin boy.â€
The imperial girl chewed one her long fingernails. As Tam was wondering how they stayed so long if she bit them, it grew a quarter of an inch. She saw him staring.
“I have alchemical talent.†It was most definitely a boast. It also seemed to get her off the track of wondering who he was. She held out her hand, and Tam took it gingerly. “I’m Tera,†she said.
“Hello, Tera,†said Tam, feeling slightly more confident. That was shattered as she added, “You, of course, will call me Princess.â€
The man who had been interrogating Tam walked in, his expression blank. “I’ve done it, Princess. The water around the ship is warmed up,†he said obsequiously. However, as he executed a slight bow, a sneer of utter contempt flickered across his face.
“Good,†said Tera and left without so much as a thank you.
The man – Vashkar – turned to Tam with a sigh. “And how do you like Her Imperial Highness?â€
Tam shook his head. “I don’t want the orb, and I don’t want this stupid power. This is worse than the Sea Roc. This is as bad as what came before…†A lone tear traced its way down his cheek.
“You are tired,†said Vashkar suavely. “You will no doubt feel differently after a rest. Come, I will lead you to your cabin.†Tam let himself be led like a child to a soft berth, where he immediately fell into a deep and welcome slumber.
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in March 14th, 2009 @ 18:31OK, we definitely need a way of conveying information that needs to be conveyed, without Ren and Octavio getting all chummy. I’m thinking it’s going to be a summons to the captain’s cabin, where Octavio, Tzil, Niria, and Vushtek fill Ren in on essential details:
Tam’s kidnapping
The orb
Various info about the fire power
He needs to know about the first two because he’s in danger, and the second so that he doesn’t misuse his power all over the place. We can stick the whole revolution thing in somewhere, but not in this scene.
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in March 14th, 2009 @ 19:31Ren was summoned to the captain’s cabin several hours after the storm. Tzil, Niria, and Vushtek, the alchooktor, were standing or sitting around, and the entire picture was an extremely imposing one. The captain sat at his carved mahogany desk, flanked my Tzil and Niria, and rolling something small and shiny around in his hands. Papers littered the floor around the desk, and an ornate golden birdcage (inhabited by a sulky-looking stormy petrel) hung from a beam. Vushtek was sitting, looking unusually grave, on a spindly gilt chair that looked as though it could hardly support his weight.
“Sit down, Ren,” said the Captain, and Vushtek indicated a straight-backed wooden chair, which was the only other furniture in the cabin. Ren sat, wordlessly.
Octavio Pye settled his hat firmly on his head and leaned forward. “You remember,” he said, “when I told you that you had fire talent.”
Ren nodded.
“And that there was only one other person that had the same talent.”
He nodded again.
“That person is Tam Eizid.”
“Is? Don’t you mean was?”
“I said is, and I mean is. That storm wasn’t natural. It was sent by Rake Vashkar, the stormmaster of the Blood Storm, the flagship of the Imperial Navy.”
“They’ve done this before,” said Niria. “Sent storms to carry away people that they want. They’ve even tried it with us, but they always failed.”
“Until now,” said Ren.
“Yes, until now,” affirmed the Captain. “The Empire’s been dying to get their hands on Tam Eizid, and now they have him.”
“But you’ve got me, sir,” said Ren. “So you’re even.”
Vushtek snorted. “Not really,” said Octavio. “Because the Empire’s got something else, something we’ve been dying to get our hands on. They have this.” He held up the thing he had been holding: a small golden orb with pictures etched on it.
“This,” he said, “is the Orb of Centaur–more accurately, a replica of the Orb of Centaur. It can be used only by fire powerfuls, and it will double, triple, quadruple, increase to the power of one hundred, I’m not even sure, the power of the user.”
Ren was staggered. “Oh,” was the most he could manage.
“Yes, oh.”More later.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in March 14th, 2009 @ 21:07OMG! You’ve done so much! Thanks Alice!
244) Who was the first mate anyway?
Did we ever really get into detail about him? I think that’s an awesome idea! 245) I’ve noticed that too, but all of the times where he’s really crazy occur after he get’s under the influence of Mordran (i think that’s his name isn’t it?). Before that, he’s just mostly a coward. But we knew that anyway, so……
246) I just thought of this. Vashkar says that he’s warmed her water, but he wasn’t there when she told him to do it.
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Alice just typed her full name...whoa that was close
in March 14th, 2009 @ 22:01249-
1. We didn’t really have one, but I felt like if there was one, he should be present at these various important gatherings that are mainly composed of Octavio, Vushtek, and the stormmasters. (Note: During the interrogation of Letor, Niria is only there because wave spirits are water beings, and Niria is a waveworker. Maybe we should mention that, to account for Vushtek not being there.) I thought about making Vushtek the first mate, but then figured that he’s quite enough to do as it was.
2. Exactly. So I feel like maybe I went a little overboard (ha ha so did Tam oh god awful puns) on the whole “ooh, Tam’s crazy!” stuff because it’s kind of fun to make him crazy, y’know? So I’ll need to rewrite that.
3. Ye-ees… I’d noticed that too. I sort of assumed that either a) he had Magical Powers (which he does!), b) someone told him, or c) he heard her from wherever he was. You know, Tera isn’t exactly quiet.Continuing:
“Yes, oh. There is a catch, though.”
“What’s the catch?” asked Ren.
“You mean besides the fact that the Empire has it and we don’t?” said Tzil bitterly. Octavio shot him a warning glance.
“Besides that,” Ren acknowledged.
“The Orb of Centaur is an extremely dangerous object, Ren,” said the Captain, gravely. “If we possessed it, we would never ask that you use it at intervals of less than a week, and only then for a few minutes at a time. Great things can be done with the orb, but it drains the strength of the user.”More later, the computer’s freaking out and I think it might blow up!
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in March 14th, 2009 @ 22:35“Tam won’t last,” said Niria flatly. “Mordran will push him and push him until he dies from sheer exhaustion, and then they’ll come looking for you, Ren.”
“But they don’t know about my powers!” said Ren, fighting against fear.
“They’ll know. Tam will tell them, if they don’t already suspect.”
Terror welled up inside Ren. He gave a little moan and dropped his head onto his hands.
“That’s why we brought you here,” said Captain Pye. “To warn you of the danger. You must be extremely careful. Don’t go out of sight of one us–myself, Tzil, Vushtek, or Niria. Don’t draw attention to your powers.”
Ren gave a shaky laugh. “Well, there’s one thing I can’t do. The only remarkable thing fire ever did around me was not kill me.”
“That’s enough,” said Pye grimly.
Vushtek held up a hand. “I’d like as much as any of you to think we’re safe for a couple of weeks until Tam Eizid is dead–”
“We’re not safe. What do you think Mordran is going to do first off when he has the Tam and the Orb together? Kill us.”
“Ahh,” said Vushtek. “That was my point.”
“Which is why we’re going to rescue Tam, as soon as we’ve got fresh water. And, if it’s possible, I think we should take the Orb as well.”
This was acknowledged to be good sense, and it was arranged that Ren should spend the night in the sick berth, under the watchful eye of Vushtek, the alchooktor.
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in March 15th, 2009 @ 13:28My wung buttons, this is hard! The entire Lithuslov bit is just wretched! Actually, it’s no more wretched than some other bits, only the other bits didn’t work at all, so I just rewrote them. I haven’t done much with this scene really, just added or removed a few words here and there, but I think we’re going to have to go through and rewrite the entire thing later. I feel a little bit guilty about rewriting so much, especially since a lot of the original writers aren’t here to help, so I feel like I’m replacing their stuff with my own. Agh. Kiwi, you should help me. I’ll pester POSOC and Meow to come help. POSOC won’t come, obviously, but it won’t be for lack of pestering!
ETA: Actually I didn’t pester POSOC. I’ve written to him at least twice already and got the same reply, so there’s no point in asking him again. But I wrote Pan, as well as Meow, so maybe at least one of them will show up.
Notes:
1. We’re keeping the fire words, because Kiwi likes them, however, I think that we need to give every spell a pair of fire words, to make it fairly consistent.
2. I forgot.
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kiwimuncher
in March 15th, 2009 @ 13:39Absolutely spiffy idea!
That just awesomely fixed most of our awkward beginning problems!
This is most likely the wrong time to ask this, but what exactly is an alchooktor?
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Alice
in March 15th, 2009 @ 13:54253-
Alchemist
Cook
Doctor
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Alice
in March 15th, 2009 @ 13:57The next morning they sailed into Pukislyn, the biggest Free Port inside or outside of Sphaere. The Sea Roc dropped anchor in the harbor and most of the crew rowed to the quay. It had been decided that Ren would be safe enough on shore as long as he stayed close to Niria, Vushtek, or Octavio, and so he joined the people in the longboats, eager to set his feet on dry land and to get his first taste of the land beyond Hermetopolis. Tzil stayed behind with the watch to make sure Letor didn’t escape.
“It started out as a Pukis-pelt trading post,” Vushtek told Ren as they rowed in to the city, “but now that Pukises are in high demand as watchdogs and pets, people prefer to have a live Pukis than a dead one.”
The city was twice as busy as Hermetopolis, though half the size, and nearly everyone was accompanied by a Pukis. Those that weren’t were wearing beautiful coats ranging in color from ivory touched with gold to a deep, fiery red, and given Vushtek’s earlier comment, it didn’t take a genius to deduce why these people didn’t have Pukises riding on their shoulders.
Marmalade dove and leapt through the crowd, touching noses with every other Pukis she met. In her excitement she couldn’t quite decide which form to stay in, so she was switching from dragon to kitten and back again every instant.
Ren laughed, because in watching the small creature twirl and dance he could, for a moment, forget about the grave danger he was in.
Unfortunately, the feeling didn’t last long.
While Ren laughed at Marmalade, he felt a weight settle on his shoulder. His mirth ceased abruptly. He looked up. A gold-orange Pukis sat there, in dragon form. A slight pressure against his legs made him look down, to see a trio of Pukises in cat form, two ivory and one flame-blue, rubbing against his ankles. “Oh, no,†he heard Captain Pye say, but the arrival of another of the creatures on his other shoulder, and one on his head, made it rather difficult to pay any attention to the world around him.
When every available place on Ren had been filled, the fire beings had to settle for trotting as close to him as possible, or flying around him. He couldn’t move a muscle. There was a brief scuffle on his head as Marmalade claimed her rightful throne. He knew the whole crowd was staring, though he couldn’t see past the sea of Pukises.
He could hear Captain Pye muttering curses, and Niria trying to disturb the Pukises with her water magic, and hostile mutterings from the crowd, and then a child shrieking, “Nina, Nina!†and his left shoulder became a little lighter for a moment, as the child pried a Pukis off it. But not for long. The Pukis, Nina, dug her claws deep into his shoulder, and he yelped in pain. “Go on, Nina!†he cried, but not really aloud, only in his head. With a purr that sounded almost like speech, the Pukis released her claws and let herself be cuddled by the little girl, who was staring at Ren as though he was some sort of–Pukis-napper.
But now Ren knew how to get them to leave him alone. He thought hard at them to leave, and one by one, they flew off, until Ren was left with the flame-blue one on one shoulder and Marmalade on the other.
Marmalade fluttered over to Captain Pye after a few minutes, leaving only the flame-blue one on his left shoulder. It refused to leave.
Come on! he silently pleaded, but the Pukis would not leave. Ren caught sight of a portly man with a Pukis-pelt scarf making his way towards them. He was holding an empty cage of what looked like solid water, made by a waveworker. The Pukis seemed to notice the man too, because it dug its claws deeper into Ren’s flesh.
Ah, so that’s how it is, Ren thought at the Pukis. Don’t worry; I’ll get you out of here.
The man with the Pukis-pelt scarf came towards Ren, who was watching him intently. Captain Pye seemed to be watching Ren, wondering what his next action was.
“Come here, Pooky, Pooky,†cooed the trapper. “Here girl.â€
The Pukis hissed and turned into its cat form.
The trapper looked at Ren. “Here, little boy. Bring her to me! She’s mine ya know!†the trapper said.
“No!†Ren yelled. His body was hot and tense. He was trembling with anger, and another, more overpowering sense of fear that he was almost positive was coming from the Pukis. Ren took off running. He heard the shouts of the trapper, Niria, and Captain Pye behind him, but he would not stop. He ran past people of every race and every size. Many of them passed him without noticing. He looked over his shoulder and saw the man running after him. The trapper was getting closer and closer. Ren could barely run anymore. He was about to collapse. The Pukis’ claws were digging hard into his shoulder. One thought came to his mind: flamulo podias–and he realized he had spoken aloud. Ren had no idea where that thought came from, or what it meant, but he suddenly stopped running. He turned around and the man was looking at his feet. They were on fire, but Ren felt no pain.
Ren watched the fire fearfully as it licked his ankles. The Pukis hissed alternately at the flames and the trapper, who was staring frozen at Ren’s feet. The little conflagration was gaining power, and now it was halfway up his calves. And now it hurt. Time seemed not to exist as he watched his lower body be consumed in fire.
Then the Pukis on his shoulder sprang into action. She scrambled down his shirt and puckered her lips, switching to dragon form as she did so. With a loud slurp, she inhaled the fire, ballooning out her cheeks. The trapper sprang away, but he wasn’t fast enough. With a loud sound like an alchemical explosion mixed with a massive belch, the Pukis spat a huge ball of bluish flame at her former master. The fat man’s white ponytail suddenly exploded into cinders, and he was left with a meager crop of thinning brown hair and several sooty marks on his face.
The Pukis shifted back into kitten form. Ren walked away with what he hoped was a jaunty, confident step, the soles of his feet screaming in pain as they touched his rough sandals.
As soon as he deemed the man far enough away, he sat down, pulled off his shoes, and examined his feet. They were badly blistered, but he might be able to make it back to the quay…if he could find it.
He sat down on the cold cobblestones and put his head in his hands. He had done everything he had been warned not to do. Don’t go out of sight, don’t draw attention to your powers… And now he was lost and alone, easy pickings for the Empire. A tear trickled down his face, and then more and more, hot and salty and stinging.
Suddenly a foreign thought touched his mind. He shrieked, leaping up and raising his fists in helpless self-defense, then wincing as his burned feet and ankles protested. The thought hit him again, and he drew a wary breath. Another small thought called out to him. “Who are you?†he snarled. He had heard of mind touching, of course–everyone had–but he had never expected it could be real. Now that it was, keeping his secret hidden would be more difficult than he had ever expected.
However, the next thought felt not harsh and threatening, like he expected, but almost gentle. But really, who would want to be gentle if they could read minds?
A sound like a crackling flame seared through his head and the soles of his feet began to throb worse than before. “Aaaaaargh!†he yelled. In a second, the feeling passed, but when he opened his eyes there sat the Pukis he had saved, the blue one with the shiny orange eyes, perched comfortably on his knees.
“Felt that, did you?†the voice purred, and finally Ren understood who the mysterious mind reader was.
“There is a water spirit in the vicinity,†the Pukis continued. “His essence chills me. I believe my old master is speaking with him. Over there!â€
The last thought switched from a gentle purr to a harsh yowl. Ren swiveled around just in time to overhear some of the conversation.
“…definitely had fire talent. Did you see how the Pukises were drawn to him?â€
“I did. Vashkar will be pleased. Mordran may even see fit to reward you.â€
The latter speaker was a mysterious figure in a blue cloak. Just as Ren tried to get closer, the figure exploded in a blast of freezing spray. A stormy petrel rose from the churning water and flew off to the East.
Ren felt as though his stomach was filled with sour milk. “They know,†he whispered.
“We have to get back to the Captain,-um- what should I call you?†said Ren.
“No need to be so loud,†thought the Pukis. “Call me…†Here it thought something unpronounceable.
“What!†Ren ejaculated, accidentally out loud. “Sorry,†he thought more quietly, “but I can’t possibly say that. Can I call you Alexis?â€
“I suppose,†the Pukis thought back. “Now, we must get you back to your Captain.â€
I know, thought Ren, but how? A thought came to his mind from the Pukis. “Use your power. Back there, when you scared away my owner, you used some. Try it now.â€
“But how?†Ren asked again.
“You mustn’t focus on using your powers yet. If you do that when you have no control, they will not work. Just let them come to you.†So Ren sat there at the bench, trying to forget the pain in his legs and watching the ships go by.
After about an hour, he stood up, winced, sat down again, and glared at the Pukis. “This isn’t working!†he exclaimed.
“Be patient,†said the Pukis. “Later, you will learn how to use your powers in the here and now, but this is not the right time.â€
So Ren sulked for about another half hour, but finally something came to his mind. Flamulo helioso, were the words, and he dutifully repeated them. As if it were a reflex, Ren closed his eyes, and spread out his arms. He had no control over this, and when he tried to put his arms down, they sprung up again. He felt some heat on his arms, and when he finally opened his eyes, his arms were on fire. The Pukis was flying next to him. Ren looked down: they were a good 50 feet above the island. Ren saw the harbor, and the distant figure of the Sea Roc bobbing up and down on the slight waves and then glanced over at the Pukis, who was flying with him. “Quick! Go before the fire begins to burn you!â€
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kiwimuncher
in March 15th, 2009 @ 14:22OK, so I’m going to try this…..
The next morning they sailed into Pukislyn, the biggest Free Port inside or outside of Sphaere. The Sea Roc dropped anchor in the harbor and most of the crew rowed to the quay. Ren, Niria, and Captain Pye were among the people in the longboats. Tzil stayed behind with the watch to make sure Letor didn’t escape.
What exactly happens to Letor? We run into him later and he supposedly has escaped. But when does that happen? I don’t think we ever got into that at all. Or did we and I forgot?
The city was twice as busy as Hermetopolis, and nearly everyone was accompanied by a Pukis. Those that weren’t were wearing beautiful coats ranging in color from ivory touched with gold to a deep, fiery red, and it didn’t take a genius to deduce why these people didn’t have Pukises riding on their shoulders. Obviously the Pukis fur trade was not as diminished as Captain Pye would like to think.
Marmalade dove and leapt through the crowd, touching noses with every other Pukis she met. In her excitement she couldn’t quite decide which form to stay in, so she was switching from dragon to kitten and back again every instant.
So, if this is a center of the Pukis fur trade, then why on earth are there tons of Pukis’ here? I mean, you’d think the Pukis’ would have misgiving of staying in this city.
Ren laughed, because in watching the small creature twirl and dance he could, for a moment, forget about his often-annoying power.
Unfortunately, the feeling didn’t last long.
While Ren laughed at Marmalade, he felt a weight settle on his shoulder. His mirth ceased abruptly. He looked up. A gold-orange Pukis sat there, in dragon form. A slight pressure against his legs made him look down, to see a trio of Pukises in cat form, two ivory and one flame-blue, rubbing against his ankles. “Oh, no,†he heard Captain Pye say, but the arrival of another of the creatures on his other shoulder, and one on his head, made it rather difficult to pay any attention to the world around him.
When every available place on Ren had been filled, the fire beings had to settle for trotting as close to him as possible, or flying around him. He couldn’t move a muscle. There was a brief scuffle on his head as Marmalade claimed her rightful throne. He knew the whole crowd was staring, though he couldn’t see past the sea of kittens and dragons.
Aw. I always thought that this part was so cute.
He could hear Captain Pye muttering curses, and Niria trying to disturb the Pukises with her water magic, and hostile mutterings from the crowd, and then a child shrieking, “Nina, Nina!†and his left shoulder became a little lighter for a moment, as the child pried a Pukis off it. But not for long. The Pukis, Nina, dug her claws deep into his shoulder, and he yelped in pain. “Go on, Nina!†he cried, but not really aloud, only in his head. How does Ren know to do that? I mean, my first reaction would be to try and shake them off or tell them to leave out loud. With a purr that sounded almost like speech, the Pukis released her claws and let herself be cuddled by the little girl, who was staring at Ren as though he was some sort of- Pukis-napper.
But now Ren knew how to get them to leave him alone. He thought hard at them to leave, and one by one, they flew off, until Ren was left with the flame-blue one on one shoulder and Marmalade on the other.
Marmalade fluttered over to Captain Pye after a few minutes, leaving only the flame-blue one on his left shoulder. It refused to leave.
Come on! he silently pleaded, but the Pukis would not leave. Ren caught sight of a portly man with a Pukis-pelt scarf making his way towards them. He was holding an empty cage of what looked like solid water, made by a waveworker. The Pukis seemed to notice the man too, because it dug its claws deeper into Ren’s flesh.
Ah, so that’s how it is, Ren thought at the Pukis. Don’t worry; I’ll get you out of here.
The man with the Pukis-pelt scarf came towards Ren, who was watching him intently. Captain Pye seemed to be watching Ren, wondering what his next action was.
“Come here, Pooky, Pooky,†cooed the trapper. “Here girl.â€
The Pukis hissed and turned into its cat form.
The trapper looked at Ren. “Here, little boy. Bring her to me! She’s mine ya know!†the trapper said.
“No!†Ren yelled. His body was hot and tense. He was trembling with anger, and another, more overpowering sense of fear that he was almost positive was coming from the Pukis. Ren took off running. Isn’t running away extremely stupid, especially when they just told him not to get out of sight? He heard the shouts of the trapper, Niria, and Captain Pye behind him, but he would not stop. He ran past people of every race and every size. Many of them passed him without noticing. He looked over his shoulder and saw the man running after him. The trapper was getting closer and closer. Ren could barely run anymore. He was about to collapse. The Pukis’ claws were digging hard into his shoulder. One thought came to his mind: flamulo podias. Ren had no idea where that thought came from, or what it meant, but he suddenly stopped running. He turned around and the man was looking at his feet. They were on fire, but Ren felt no pain.
Ren watched the fire fearfully as it licked his ankles. The Pukis hissed alternately at the flames and the trapper, who was staring frozen at Ren’s feet. Ren recalled the captain’s words: “Those with fire power seem to be more susceptible than others.†The little conflagration was gaining power, and now it was halfway up his calves. And now it hurt. Time seemed not to exist as he watched his lower body be consumed in fire.
Then the Pukis on his shoulder sprang into action. She scrambled down his shirt and puckered her lips, switching to dragon form as she did so. With a loud slurp, she inhaled the fire, ballooning out her cheeks. The trapper sprang away, but he wasn’t fast enough. With a loud sound like an alchemical explosion mixed with a massive belch, the Pukis spat a huge ball of bluish flame at her former master. The fat man’s fancy, white wig exploded into cinders, and he was left with a meager crop of thinning brown hair and several sooty marks on his face. Ummmmmm. What was the point of the feet bursting into flame? I don’t understand.
The Pukis shifted back into kitten form. Ren walked away with what he hoped was a jaunty, confident step, the soles of his feet screaming in pain as they touched his rough sandals. Walk away? I would be running like crazy.
As soon as he deemed the man far enough away, he sat down, pulled off his shoes, and examined his feet. They were badly blistered, but he might be able to make it back to the quay…if he could find it.So, I’m not at all sure about the part with him running from the Pukis vender like that and the weird little feet into flame thing. What do you think?
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kiwimuncher
in March 15th, 2009 @ 14:26254) Revelation! That’s an awesome play on words there!
Oops! You already did that part.
My bad.
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Alice
in March 15th, 2009 @ 14:57257- I did do that part, but you brought up some excellent points, so I’ve no objection to reworking this scene.
1. Letor get blown WAY out of proportion. I think we may have decided, or at least discussed, the possibility of just changed all the later references to Letor into random wave spirits, to minimize major characters (that was one of the problems with the story that TMFA pointed out).
2. Lithuslov is where the Pukises live. Mostly they stay away from the city, but people capture them live now, to use as pets.
3. It is, rather.
4. I don’t know…I generally think things before I say them, personally, so maybe he thought it and then she left. But given his reaction later to Alexis’s ability to mind touch, maybe we should change that bit. What say you?
5. Well of course it is, but no one ever said Ren was smart. Not to mention the fact that there’s a huge crowd staring at him, there’s an angry fur trapper approaching, and he’s a little bit panicked. Can we change it? I don’t really like the results of his running away, but I don’t think there’s anything to be done about it.
6. Nor do I, my dear Kiwi, nor do I. I was horribly confused when this part was first written. Let’s see what Donaldo said about it…
191. Alice | April 22nd, 2007 at 11:29 am
Can we please have a new thread? This is ridiculous. DtK,SMaNotSP(anttIR), who’s feet were on fire? Ren’s, or the Pukis-trapper’s?192. Donaldo the supercoolio awesome nerd | April 22nd, 2007 at 6:00 pm
Ren was. Sorry, I didn’t make that clear enough. And you are right-We need a new thread. No one is here anymore.193. Alice | April 22nd, 2007 at 6:10 pm
Um, why did Ren set his own feet on fire. That doesn’t make sense. But anyways.194. Alice | April 23rd, 2007 at 4:59 pm
Darn it! Hello?195. Donaldo the supercoolio awesome nerd | April 23rd, 2007 at 7:06 pm
Alice-I don’t know. I thought it would be an example of his powers. I left it up to someone else to figure out how it helped him. WE NEED A NEW THREAD! NO ONE POSTS HERE ANYMORE! I mean, even Prarilius Canix left!196. Alice | April 23rd, 2007 at 7:19 pm
Maybe it didn’t help him. Maybe it was meant to set the Pukis trapper’s feet on fire, but Ren, being new to this, botched it. I promised the GAPAs I wouldn’t nag about a new thread when they made Books in Progress, Part 2, so I can’t help except indirectly.
So you see, not even Donaldo knew.
7. Ah, yes, but would you be running away if the bottoms of your feet were inflicted with second-degree burns? I wouldn’t.
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Alice
in March 15th, 2009 @ 15:05Ren flapped his arms, laughing, and dove towards the ship like a falcon, landing with a thump on the deck and gasping at the pain of the impact on his tender legs. The fire on his arms sputtered and spat and then went out.
Tzil, who was standing on the quarterdeck, looking out across the harbor, turned at the sound. His eyes widened when he saw the Pukis, but he recollected himself and beckoned to a man–his face seemed familiar, but Ren couldn’t think of the corresponding name. “Go find the Captain and tell him we’ve found the boy,” Tzil commanded, and the man nodded and started off. “Tell him to bring the alchooktor!” Tzil added. The man touched his hat, climbed over the side and into a waiting boat, and was gone.
“Well,” said Tzil. “You’ve made a pretty mess of things. Half the Pukises in the city flying off without rhyme nor reason to go sit on your head–mysterious rumors of flaming boys–every crew member who can be trusted not to blab out looking for you, and wave spirits around every corner–I always knew trouble would come of this.”
Ren gaped. He knew he’d made a spectacle–though he hadn’t meant to–but he’d never expected it would grow so huge so fast.
“What in Sphaere have you done, boy?†Octavio Pye came tearing over the side of the ship, seized Ren by the shoulder, and dragged him unceremoniously into the cabin, where he pushed him onto a chair and then proceeded to fly into a towering rage, while Tzil looked on from the doorway and Vushtek waited calmly for the Captain to finish. Ren nodded at the appropriate times and looked dutifully ashamed, but he couldn’t concentrate. His thoughts kept drifting off to join Alexis’s, and every time, she would prod him back into focusing on the Captain. Even so, he hardly heard a single word from Octavio Pye until the berating ceased abruptly.
“What?†asked Ren, startled out of his reverie.
“Your legs!†said Octavio Pye, aghast.
“What? Oh.†Ren looked down at his legs. His pants were burnt up to the knee, and what of his legs was visible was an angry red color. “It doesn’t hurt that much,†he lied.
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Alice
in March 15th, 2009 @ 16:15Oh, my dear Sea Roc…how you have changed…
It’s funny how different threads feel different to me, although they all look the same. Like this one, which hardly looks different from the first one, feels different. The first one feels all eager and promising and kind of rainy, with snowdrops, while this one feels…I don’t know. Different.
Do you realize this RRR has been up for over two years?
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Alice
in March 15th, 2009 @ 18:56…And this particular thread has been up for 8 months of that. Maybe it’s time for a new one soon…
Note: Earlier we mentioned “the ship’s doctor.” We should note that that’s Vushtek.
“Vushtek,” said the Captain despairingly. “Deal with him. Tzil, we’ll sail at sunset.”
Ren obediently followed Vushtek to the sick berth, where he had spent the previous night, and allowed the achooktor to smear ointment on the blisters and bandage them. He watched docilely as Vushtek banged and cursed in his search for bandages. “Bandages for burns,” he told Ren as he wound slightly salty cloths around the boy’s legs, “should be clean and dry. Unfortunately, when you live on a ship, nothing is clean and dry, not even the bandages. I see you’ve picked up a friend,” he added, nodding at Alexis, who had been perched on Ren’s shoulder for the past half an hour.
“Oh, yes,” said Ren. “Her name’s Alexis.”
Vushtek raised one dark bushy eyebrow but said nothing until he had finished tying the bandage. “You’d best lie down for now,” he said. “It’s no good walking on those feet, not for a while yet.
Ren allowed Vushtek to help him into a hammock, and Alexis curled around his neck in cat form, purring faint, smoky purrs. Ren smiled, feeling small and childish and taken-care-of. It was a sensation he hadn’t felt in years, certainly not since his uncle had died. He fell asleep thinking of home.
“Wake up, boy!†the voice of Octavio Pye said, searing through Ren’s dreams. The powder monkey sat up with a start, and the hammock rocked wildly.
“Now,” said the Krakeneater, looking particularly fierce. “I want you to tell me exactly what happened to you. Don’t leave anything out. And I’m especially interested in learning how you came upon THIS.†With his last word he yanked the furry figure of Alexis from behind his back and waved her in front of Ren’s face. “Do you want Marmalade to be so jealous that she burns our entire ship into the sea?â€
“Marmalade wouldn’t do that!†Ren was shocked.
“She most certainly would,†said Captain Pye grimly. “She’s had a hand in sinking most of the ships we ever pirated, and she could certainly sink this one.â€
Alexis sank her teeth into Captain Pye’s hand and jumped onto Ren’s lap, hissing.
“Alright,†said Ren slowly. “I’ll tell you the whole story.†And so he did, starting with the Pukis trapper, and ending with the fact that he could speak to Alexis.
“That’s very well and good, Ren,†said Octavio, “but if you’re going to use your powers, you need to use them with good judgment. According to all the old literature, a fire powerful carries more magic than an alchemist or a stormmaster could hold, and if it’s misused you could virtually destroy Sphaere, or the Inner Sea at the very least.â€
Ren stared, incredulous. Suddenly his head snapped back with a jerk. Alexis looked into his eyes innocently.
“Sheesh, get a grip on yourself,†she thought calmly, only half joking. “You need to stop acting so surprised every 3 seconds when you learn about yet another of your powers. Considering how many more there are to come…â€
“What!?†Ren said, shocked. “I have more?â€
“What?” The captain looked bemused.
“Nothing.â€
“Are you sure? You’re talking to yourself.â€
“I’m talking to Alexis,†said Ren.
“Ah. About Alexis. We’re going to have to work something out with her and Marmalade. I understand that she’ll have to stay on the ship, but I’d rather that we continue to have a ship to stay on.â€
“Perhaps we could talk it out,” suggested Alexis.
“Maybe they could, um, talk to each other about it,” repeated Ren. The captain looked faintly disbelieving. Ren shrugged helplessly. “It was her idea.”
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Purple Panda
in March 16th, 2009 @ 19:17Hey, guess what! I showed up! -surprise-
I’m not very good at the whole editing-on-MB thing, although I really love editing. So…how are we doing this?
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in March 16th, 2009 @ 19:30Hello. …
258 re 256- Point 6: I have a little imput on this. I always thought that the feet being set on fire was supposed to make him run faster. I think it makes perfect sense that he would be surprised and not do anything and then get burned.
Actually, I have no idea what comes after that because I haven’t read it in so long so maybe that was what was origionally intended.
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Alice
in March 16th, 2009 @ 19:42Yay! You’re here! Be right back, I have to look up fruit compote.
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Alice
in March 16th, 2009 @ 19:52262- Well, basically, I’ve been editing/rewriting as seems proper. Kiwi and I discussed a lot of stuff earlier, so that’s mostly what I’ve been dealing with. I’ve been taking out a lot of the direct, chummy conversations between Ren and Pye, and adding in a lot more of Tzil, Niria, and Vushtek. Basically, take a piece of writing, either from what I’ve already edited or directly after (obviously this won’t work if we’re all editing at the same time, but we can cross that bridge when we come to it), and add/delete/rewrite as you see fit. If you like you can talk with us about it, like:
“What should I do about this piece? I want to do [X], but is this conversation absolutely essential?”
But you really don’t have to. If anyone has objections, they can voice them.
263-
That makes sense!
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Purple Panda
in March 16th, 2009 @ 21:44Hmm. Do you have the document on your computer? If so, will you send it to me? I’ll have my dad print it out at work, then I can write all over it and then talk about them here. It’s always easier for me to think with a pen in my hand and the actual document in front of me.
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Alice
in March 16th, 2009 @ 22:05266- Ah. The document. All right, I’ll sent it to you, only not right now, because I’m cold and I need to make dinner and work on that poster.
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POSOC & Smoleeon
in March 18th, 2009 @ 09:19OK, in summary, Alice’s constant cajolery and occasional threats have finally convinced me to return. What can I do?
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Alice
in March 18th, 2009 @ 17:45268- I’ll send you the document too. Look through it, make notes, rewrite bits that you feel need to be rewritten…that sort of thing. Change a few words if that’s all that’s needed, rewrite or cut entire scenes if you think that that is what will make the story better. Don’t try to rewrite half the thing before posting it–one scene at a time is fine, preferable even.
Remember: You don’t have to consult us on every point. Go ahead and rewrite a whole chapter if you feel like it. If anyone objects to anything that has been changed, say so and a compromise can be reached.
I’ll go send Pan and POSOC the document now.
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POSOC & Smoleeon
in March 18th, 2009 @ 18:48269- First, I need to know the tone that we’re going for. More realism on the shipboard scenes, of course. No Jarbun magic, great. Any other specifics?
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Alice
in March 18th, 2009 @ 19:00270- We’re working on making the officers a little more distant. I think that’s all we can do. I would like to make the magic a little less of a big deal, but since the entire thing has been based around Ren’s Amazing Magical Powers since very near the beginning, I’m not sure how.
I’m not sure what we decided as far as the Unknowables go, maybe if we can find a different Mysterious Past for Tam, we can take them out. If not, we can develop them heavily in the next book.
-has ideas- Let’s keep the Unknowables, actually, just get rid of Jarbun magic.
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Purple Panda
in March 18th, 2009 @ 19:17I got it!
I’m going to have my dad print it out at work (single-spaced it’s 88 pages, which is way more than our printer at home can handle). Then, I’ll start chipping away at it.
Would you like me to post changes here, or email you the revised document, or mail you the document with all of the writing on it, or something else?
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POSOC & Smoleeon
in March 18th, 2009 @ 19:58First thing I noticed was a ton of awkward exposition in the beginning. I’ll have to work on that.
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Alice
in March 19th, 2009 @ 00:23272- Post changes here. And if you can do it in installments that’s better because if you don’t a lot of it will be obsolete by the time you post it.
273- How so?
Bed time! G’night all.
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Rosanne Spector (Administrator)
in March 19th, 2009 @ 01:10G’night, Alice and the rest of the blog. Time to go to sleep here too.
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Cat's Meow
in March 19th, 2009 @ 19:13Goodness, this is a long thread.
Alice, can you e-mail it to me, too? I should probably re-read it before making any changes.
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Alice
in March 19th, 2009 @ 19:41276- Mmkay.
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kiwimuncher
in March 20th, 2009 @ 15:06People!
Awesome! 260) Wowsers! That’s a long time!
263) That’s a wonderful idea!
Maybe we should include that in there or something? Maybe here? “Felt that, did you?†the voice purred, and finally Ren understood who the mysterious mind reader was.
“I do believe, that when your feet caught on fire, you were meant to run faster. Not stand there as if you were petrified,” the voice continued with a rumbling chuckle.
“How….” Ren protested.
“There is a water spirit in the vicinity,†the Pukis interrupted. “His essence chills me. I believe my old master is speaking with him. Over there!â€
The last thought switched from a gentle purr to a harsh yowl. Ren swiveled around just in time to overhear some of the conversation.
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Alice
in March 20th, 2009 @ 19:34278- That’s good.
I would do more rewriting, but at this particular moment I would rather not; I’m a little daunted by the whole fire-scrying thing.
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Purple Panda
in March 22nd, 2009 @ 12:39[A lot of this stuff is really minor and mainly my tendency to nit-pick before actually making large changes to the story, but I’m going to post them anyway.]
1.) Chapter One– Captain Pye says, “So the boy is in trouble with the Sanguiz Empire, Octavio mused. I think he won’t refuse a job aboard the Sea Roc.” I think it makes more sense to say “I don’t think he will refuse a job aboard the Sea Roc,” because the previous construction sounded a bit awkward.
2.) Chapter One– “There were three loud cracks, and Ren cringed, expecting to feel the bullets smashing into his chest. But they didn’t.” –> But he (not they) didn’t. [He didn’t feel the bullets smashing into his chest is more prominent than the bullets themselves.]
…that’s all I’m going to type up for now…I think I’m just going to read through the whole thing before making any large changes.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in March 30th, 2009 @ 19:09Captain Pye stood up and walked out of the cabin, going to find Marmalade. Alexis followed, and Ren was alone. Or so he thought. He flopped back on the hammock, and once again his thoughts turned to Tam Eizid, that unknown personality. How he wanted to share his wonder with someone! So much new power, and only one other person could have any idea what it was like.
He heard a rush of wind, and a very small, bright fire appeared a few feet away, hovering less than half an inch above the floor. “Did I start it?†he asked himself. Perhaps this was the beginning of the end. Maybe he had misused his power already, and Sphaere was doomed. Why would he think that Sphaere is doomed because he thinks he’s going to die? Is he really that full of himself?
The fire grew bigger and bigger, and Ren, with a nightmare passivity, watched it grow larger, closer, brighter. Soon it would reach his hammock, and then him and – Ren couldn’t think about that. He closed his eyes tightly. Nothing happened, but an odd sensation came over him. He tried to cry out and failed. He opened his eyes to see images moving around him and heard voices. The images cleared away, and he was standing on a gray ship. No one took notice of him except for a boy swabbing the decks next to him. “I know you,†the boy muttered to himself. “Who…Ren?†Of course he knows him! I think we need too change this. Very much so. Perhaps to… “No one took notice of him except for a boy swabbing the decks next to him, who stared up in awe. “Ren!” he exclaimed in a voice that verged between shock and relief.”
Ren suddenly knew who the boy was. “Tam,†he breathed. How about…. “Ren suddenly recognized who the boy was. “Tam!” he cried in delight. “I thought you were dead!” (Or at least, I think he thought that Tam was. Or am I wrong?)
Captain Pye found Ren lying on the floor next to his hammock. He was asleep or in a trance, and appeared to be holding a conversation with a voice unheard. Why in the world would captain Pie find him? Doesn’t he have something better to do then go down to the alchooktor’s quarters? Wouldn’t it be more likely that Vushtek would find him?
Rake Vashkar looked at Tam. He was kneeling on the deck, a holystone in his hand and a bucket by his side. But he wasn’t scrubbing the deck. He was talking. OK, while I’m thinking about it, why is Tam scrubbing the deck? He’s a prisoner isn’t he? Wouldn’t it make more sense to have him chained up in a dark room or something? Or maybe I’m just confused.
“Where is this?†asked Ren.
“The Blood Storm,†replied Tam. “Well, not really. I’m not sure where we are. I was on the Blood Storm, a minute ago.â€
“Did you set something on fire?â€
“Me? No. Why?â€
Ren took a breath. “Did you know you have fire power, Tam?â€
“How do you know about that?â€
“Because I do too. I set my legs on fire. See?†He gestured to his blistered calves.
“Ouch,†said Tam sympathetically.
Ren frowned. Something had occurred to him. “You do know about your talent. Captain said you didn’t.â€
“The Blood Storm’s weatherweaver told me about it. He wants me to use some orb. He’s paying me an awful lot.â€
“Oh, no,†moaned Ren. But then the grayness that surrounded him and Tam closed in, bringing with it all the previous images. He cried out, and woke.
As the gray mist faded and Tam came to himself, he found he was still sitting on the deck. His first thought was, what in Sphaere just happened?
His next thought was, I’m scrubbing the deck. What about all those fancy positions I was promised? But of course, he would only get a good position if he promise to work that orb. It was tempting, that was for sure.
Very tempting, in fact. Tam looked down at the holystone in his hand, and the vast expanse of deck that he was supposed to scrub. If he just accepted the offer, he would never have to do this again.
At any rate, what had the Empire ever done to harm him? Just because the pirates hated Sanguinus IX didn’t mean he had to. And what the Emperor did couldn’t be any worse than what the pirates did. Could it? Didn’t the empire do something terrible to him? Or something like that? I mean, he has this painful past that no one knows about that he wants to forget and….. I suppose that doesn’t HAVE to have anything to do with the empire. So, never mind. But I am curious. What is his past? What did yall have in mind for that?
Never scrub the deck again… Any position, even first mate… Wages of up to ten aurums a day…
His mind was made up. Tam stood up purposefully and walked across the deck towards Rake Vashkar, who was talking angrily to a sunburned sailor. Tam summoned up his courage.
“I will use the Orb,†he said. Hmmmmm. I don’t know about this part. What do you guys think?
Captain Pye’s face blurred into focus slowly, like water clearing after mud has been stirred up. “What happened, boy?†cried the Captain. <Most likely wouldn’t be Pye here. Vushtek would call him in.
“They know!†Ren said urgently. “They’ve told him!â€
“Told who? Who told him? Told him what?â€
Ren sat up. “Vashkar told Tam, that he has fire powers. That means they know about it, which means that Tam isn’t safe no matter what he does.â€
The Captain swore. “At least they don’t know about you.â€
“Well, actually… â€
“WHAT, boy? Speak up.â€
“That Pukis trapper told a disguised wave spirit that I had fire talent. The spirit mentioned Vashkar and Mordran.†And this is coming up now why? Wouldn’t this have been spilled earlier?
Pye cursed. Fumbling through his pockets, he pulled out an object that looked like a dried kraken tentacle. WHoah. Gnawing convulsively on it, Captain Pye paced the deck, muttering “Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.†That doesn’t sound very Captainy, though I guess everyone can be overstressed. He needs one of those stress squeezy things.
Ren said nothing. He could see that it was a much larger dilemma than he could comprehend.
“Why is this such a problem, sir?†Ren asked. “I mean, they won’t need me until Tam can’t…†he realized what he was saying and broke off, guiltily. “And I’m sure we’ll have rescued Tam before he can really do any harm,†he amended hastily.
“Well…†the Captain hesitated. “There are two things they might do. They may try to capture you now so that when Tam dies, you can take over immediately, or they may combine your powers and gamble on not needing you after you have done your work.â€
“Combine our powers?â€
“Yes. Your powers merged, and with the globe, will make you two more powerful than anyone in Sphaere, except for the Unknowables.â€
The Unknowables? Ren thought. What are those? Ren wanted to ask, but knew it was not the right time. Perhaps, later he would.
The captain and Ren were quiet for a long time, but Ren finally perked up. He said, in his most confident voice, “We must get Tam back, and we will.†Oh really? Ren’s getting a big head here. And where is everyone else? We should add them in the coversation. I mean, they’re kind of Pye’s advisors. Sort of. Ren is listening in the background. he’s a powder-monkey for goodness sake!
The Captain sighed. “I admire your confidence, Ren, but it may be too late.â€
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Alice
in March 30th, 2009 @ 22:52281-
1. Oh no! He’s not that conceited. I’m not sure if we edited this bit out, but there was a bit where either Alexis or Octavio tells him that he’s powerful enough to destroy Sphaere if he uses his power without knowing what he’s doing. So naturally he gets a little paranoid. Maybe we should add some paranoia? Unless we edited the explainy bit out, in which case we either have to put it back in or take out the paranoia.
2+3. Yeah, they know each other, but in the original draft they’d only known OF each other (they never really met) for like a day. Also, I’m not sure if Ren thought Tam was dead. I don’t think so. Let’s use your changes. Though I dunno, I kinda want to do drastic things to the whole fire-scrying notion since it’s sort of not very well planned out.
4. Yes, let’s have it be Vushtek. That’s much better.
5. Tam’s a prisoner, right, but he wouldn’t be in chains and stuff, because they’re pretending he’s not a prisoner to make him cooperate. He’s like a posh, oblivious prisoner. So they deck-scrubbing still doesn’t work. Let’s change it?
6. Heh heh. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. So you want to know Tam’s mysterious past, eh? Well now. -stalls-
OK, here’s the meat of it. We (mostly myself) created a Mysterious Past for Tam, without actually deciding what it was. This is remarkable easy to do. Make him haunted and cowardly, make various references to a miserable life, give him nightmares and have him talk in his sleep, etc. You know how it works. (I’m not doing very well at getting to the point, am I? I’ll try harder.) After we’d done this, we realized we needed to give him an actual past and so we decided that the Unknowables had been pestering Tam for his entire young life, trying to get him to use his powers in their defense. Of course this means he must know about his powers, which is contradictory with some other stuff, but I think I corrected that. What we really need to decide is: Do we want the Unknowables or not? Because we can make a different Mysterious Past if we want. I had some ideas about the Unknowables, but they aren’t particularly good ones. Well, actually, they’re OK. I was thinking a scene for a later book when they like get to some Unknowable temple or some scene with a whole pantheon of Unknowable gods. Could be fun.
Shall we take a poll? I’ll email it to Meow and POSOC and Pan and you can answer it here. (Poll is attached to bottom of notes.)
7. Maybe the decision should take longer. More agonizing, more tossing and turning, finally he tries to leave to inform someone of his decision, realizes he can’t because there’s a spell on the door, realizes he’s a prisoner, is scared out of his wits, decides the only way to stay alive is to cooperate. Or maybe without the realizing he’s a prisoner bit. But he has to decide that in the end.
8. Good point. But it hasn’t been that long, Just a few hours.
9. OK, perhaps pacing the deck is a bit over-the-top. But I kinda like it. It shows that he’s not completely fearless and untouchable.
10. Aye. I concur. Ren is important, but they sort of treat him like an extremely valuable and troublesome object, or a boy, not as an equal.POLL:
Should we keep the Unknowables?
a) Yes, or course.
b) No way!
c) Let’s keep ’em, but edit them to bits first! FUN!I pick c.
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Alice
in March 30th, 2009 @ 23:06Note: if you don’t want to see the long process on my indecision plus a Daughters-related tangent, scroll down the screen until you see the bold letters. These indicate my final choice.
On second thought, I’m changing that to B. No, C. No, B. No…
Argh. I can’t decide. The problem of finding another Mysterious Past looms (however much I try to make it sound like no big thing–ah, whoops. “It’s no big thing. I got the three hundred bucks. I’ve got friends. Good friends. Just ’cause one guy comes into your life and ends up making trouble… Just ’cause one lousy guy comes in and splits when–hey, easy come, easy go.” Is it bad that I can still recite other people’s monologues fairly accurately five months after the show is over? I might be able to do mine completely, still.) Anyway, it looms large, but the Unknowables have bugged me to no end ever since they came into being.I pick B.
Now I’m going to go write my essay. Bye.
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kiwimuncher
in April 2nd, 2009 @ 14:57282) C. Because I liek the idea that somehow, the Unknowables have been trapped and they need someone to use the Orb to free them. And I also like the idea that Mordran can’t totally be in control of the world unless the Unknowables are destroyed intirely, not just banished, but he needs someone to use the Orb to do that to. And I just like it.
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Alice
in April 2nd, 2009 @ 16:54.OK, here are the results:
Meow: B or C
Kiwi: C
Pan: B, but C might work too.
POSOC: B
Alice: BIt’s not really even (clearly B wins), but this is an RRR, so we have to agree on this kind of stuff. If we ignore the votes of the people who are NEVER HERE*, then we have a B and a C. Is there a way we can strike a compromise, or not?
*POSOC isn’t coming back, I can betcha anything. He says he’s “too out of the loop.” I wheedled and coaxed and laid out all of my arguments, some of which are fairly foolproof, but he ignored them. Pan and Meow offered no excuses or definite answers, but from the pattern I’ve seen, they won’t come back either. So I guess it’s just you and me, Kiwi.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in April 2nd, 2009 @ 18:06It sounded like they were into it before. *is optimistic* We probubly shouldn’t ignore their votes. Of course, that means we should get rid of the unknowables. Alas.
What will we do with the parts of the story that are structured around them? Like Tam going crazy? That’s a big one. And the little thing at the end that I liked. (Of course, I guess I am biased, since I wrote it. Come to think of it, I wrote Tam going crazy too. *is guilty*) and I guess the part that I said in post 284.
I suppose that another reason why I liked the Unknowables was that it gave the story the potential to be not just another “dude saves the world from power hungry evil guy that wants to rule the universe.” You know?
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in April 2nd, 2009 @ 18:53I liked the Unknowables. Like Kiwi said, they make it a not-so-mainstream story. I say C. They do need a little more structure.
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Alice
in April 2nd, 2009 @ 19:05286- Oh, I like Tam’s madness and stuff. I just think we can make a better reason. But anyway, I think the compromise is C, so C it is.
287- Oh, yes, a not-so-mainstream story. -laughs hollowly- It was as a not-so-mainstream story. Once. For the first ten posts. But then…I dunno. It’s not piratical anymore, it’s just fantasy.
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in April 3rd, 2009 @ 18:47288- That’s why I said not-so… It still is typical.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in April 5th, 2009 @ 20:16True. *wants to lighten the mood somehow* *can’t think how*
So. I guess……erm…… *sigh* I’ve been attacked by a bit of awkwardness.
Did everyone have a nice palm sunday? I love palm sunday. At my church, everybody gets together, waves palm branches, eats a HUGE dinner together with the most tasty desserts ever, and then the little kids have an easter egg hunt. *happy off topic thoughts*
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in April 5th, 2009 @ 22:47290- I had a nice palm sunday. But at my church, we didn’t really do anything. We just had some palm fronds for people to piddle with during the service.
Ummm, and the easter egg hunt is next saturday.
I love easter egg hunts. I wish my parents still did them for me!Oh, funny thing, in drivers’ ed, on the powerpoint, it said “parish” instead of “perish”. I didn’t point it out, though, because the teacher was in the middle of trying to scare us with statistics.
I wish I could have an edited copy of this instead of having to work a lot to edit mine. But that won’t happen until I Kokon with Alice. Which might happen. Maybe.
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kiwimuncher
in April 6th, 2009 @ 06:54Yeah. Easter egg hunts are fun!
I think my parents would approve of a Kokon for me. They’d be paranoid of internet stalkers. And it would most likely be expensive to find somewhere where I could meet you, seeing as y’all probubly don’t live near me. Alas.
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kiwimuncher
in April 6th, 2009 @ 06:55Oops. I meant would not approve.
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Alice
in April 6th, 2009 @ 16:12I don’t celebrate Palm Sunday. I’m feeling curiously sour at the moment, so I’ll be leaving soon to go revel in the beauty of the day.
292- Kokons aren’t really dangerous if you don’t go alone. I mean, an internet stalker isn’t going to kidnap you with your parents standing right there.
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Enceladus(Faglan)(10 Academy wung points)
in April 20th, 2009 @ 05:19Can we get back to the story? Also, could someone post a plot synopsis? I’m confuzzled. *is confused and doesn’t want to read 2000 loooooong installments*
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Alice
in April 20th, 2009 @ 09:30We finished the story. If you want to help edit, which is what we’re doing, then you have to read the entire story. When we write the sequel, you can help, naturally, but I think we’d all prefer it if you just read the story. The whole thing is posted somewhere on this thread. I’ll locate it for you when I get back from school, if you want.
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Enceladus(Faglan)(10 wung points)(and would like some spdzk points, whatever they are)(and likes putting parenthese after his name)
in April 20th, 2009 @ 09:39I’m not at school! Whee! Spring break! could you post it here, perhaps?
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Alice
in April 20th, 2009 @ 17:41It is here. -waves hand- Somewhere on here. I’m just not sure what comment number.
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in April 20th, 2009 @ 17:52Posts 25-28. You should see it if you’re scrolling all the way down. It’s a big block of text. Thanks, Alice!
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Armada
in April 20th, 2009 @ 18:04292- What state do you live in? (And please don’t say ‘eternal confusion’ or something like that.) As Alice said, they’re not really dangerous if your parents are right there.
So, I’m here. I’ll reread the whole thing at some point, but not now… my eyes are too tired.
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kiwimuncher
in April 24th, 2009 @ 14:52I live in good old NC.
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Alice
in April 20th, 2009 @ 22:16296.2- You’re welcome. What for?
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in April 21st, 2009 @ 23:11For posting the whole thing! I guess I was a little unspecific.
Hi Armada!
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Armada
in April 24th, 2009 @ 15:02297.1- Oh. Cool.
298.1- Hi Kyra!
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in April 25th, 2009 @ 21:16Cool? I wish. It’s freakishly HOT! *fans self* gurgle. *drinks water like a packhorse*
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in April 25th, 2009 @ 21:21OK! We need to get back on track! Where were we? *looks back over thread*
Oh! Yeah! Tam had just said he’d use the Orb and we did all the fire talking mess. I was wondering, why would Tam say yes? I mean, we know he dislikes the empire for some reason and he’s never striked me as being selfish, maybe a coward, but not necessarily selfish.
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Alice
in April 26th, 2009 @ 20:33300- Hm. I dunno, I think Tam’s pretty selfish. Also, he doesn’t know what they’ll do to him if he says no, so he might be partially driven by cowardice. But anyway, he has no real reason to hate the Empire, except for the Unknowables who told him the Empire was awful (and he hates the Unknowables) and the pirates (he also hates the pirates). The Empire is offering him more luxury than he’s ever known, and except for Tera, they don’t seem half bad. Even Tera’s no worse than the pirates and the Unknowables.
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kiwimuncher
in April 27th, 2009 @ 15:48True, I suppose so. Why does he hate the pirates?
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Alice
in April 27th, 2009 @ 18:59302- Tam never meant to fall in with pirates. He stowed away on a merchant ship in a desperate attempt to escape the Unknowables and possibly an abusive or neglectful family (I always imagined he was sort of ignored and picked on by his family, but that’s just me), but the pirates captured the ship and Tam was given the option of working or dying. (This is the fate we had originally planned for Ren, but I sort of jumped the gun way back in the beginning and introduced Octavio Pye in the second or third post…) So he chose to work, but he doesn’t like to work, and he sees the pirates as having thwarted him in his attempt to escape the Unknowables, because he was trying to get as far from Sphaere as possible in the hopes that they wouldn’t be able to find him, and the pirates stopped him before he could get away. Besides, the pirates were never very nice to Tam. He was strange and moody and cowardly, and they always picked on him. He was the outcast of the ship.
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Donaldo the Supercoolio Awesome Nerd
in April 29th, 2009 @ 21:05Well hello all. I miss you guys so much! I just am too busy now! Just wanted to say hi… I hope the editing is going well.
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Alice
in April 29th, 2009 @ 23:54304- Do mine eyes deceive me? Could such a thing be? Has Donaldo the SAN returned? Oh heavens above, what a fortuitous happenstance! Come help us edit, and never mind being busy. We’re all busy, but that doesn’t stop us. If you leave again, I will personally duel you when we next meet!
Somehow I don’t feel I’m a very persuasive person.
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Donaldo the Supercoolio Awesome Nerd
in April 30th, 2009 @ 00:07I’ll try, but it will take a while. First, I need to read the whole thing, but in English we are reading about 1 book every 2 weeks so it will take a while to get to. Plus, I have track afterschool every day, and Boy Scouts and church…
But at the same time, a duel from Alice? *shudders*
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Alice
in April 30th, 2009 @ 08:31306- Yay!
-puts away sword-
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Armada
in April 30th, 2009 @ 11:41Donaldo! I haven’t seen you ever! (And that’s true– I don’t think we’ve ever met before) Hi!
Sorry I disappeared for a while there. I still need to reread the whole story, and I haven’t found time lately….
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kiwimuncher
in May 1st, 2009 @ 20:13303) I suppose you’re right. OK. Now I’m mad at Tam. *goes away for a moment to be mad about how Tam’s only friend was Ren and he betrayed him because he’s a cowardly stupid idiot person who…..ARG! *Gurglefiretruckpinacoladaschoolbusgrasshopperfrogtreeyodleromelette*
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Alice
in May 1st, 2009 @ 20:38309- I know, isn’t he hateful and pathetic? I hate Tam, yet at the same time he’s one of my favorite characters, just because he has such an obvious character. It’s really fun to write about Tam, because he’s cowardly and selfish and you always know how he’ll react to situations. I like putting him in uncomfortable predicaments, because he changes sides so much and is just so miserable.
Does this strike anyone else as vaguely sadistic? I’m a little ashamed. I love torturing my characters.
Anyway, we’ve got a ton of static characters, and I think we kind of need to deal with that. The only characters I can think of that actually change are Tam and Niria, the former by becoming steadily less sane/tolerable and the latter…just because. Arn is static; Vushtek is static; Tzil is fairly static, though he does go kind of crazy right before he dies, but I think that was just a fit of rage that was always lurking beneath the surface; Octavio’s pretty static, though who knows how this will change in the rewrite; Alexis is static; Tera’s static; and above all, Ren is static.
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kiwimuncher
in May 1st, 2009 @ 21:34Static? What do you mean by static?
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Alice
in May 1st, 2009 @ 21:35311- Doesn’t change.
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kiwimuncher
in May 1st, 2009 @ 21:37One they necessarily have to change?
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Alice
in May 1st, 2009 @ 21:54313- Well, it’s more interesting when characters change.
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Donaldo the supercoolio awesome nerd
in May 1st, 2009 @ 22:35Since I haven’t read the whole thing, the question I would ask is:
How important are the characters? If they are meant to be character foils or are just minors, I don’t think they have to. If they are more important- sidekicks, etc- they could.
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Alice
in May 2nd, 2009 @ 00:21315- Oh, yes, some of them don’t have to change at all. Vushtek dies, so I think he can remain static. Tera’s pretty minor in this book; she may change a bit in later volumes. I’d like Ren, Octavio, and Alexis to not be dynamic, though.
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Alice
in May 2nd, 2009 @ 11:42Ah, oops, that “not” shouldn’t be there.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in May 2nd, 2009 @ 11:36Well, Ren changes a little. And so does Pye, since he’s sort of captured and stuck in a dungeon and sort of has a depressed moment there. Alexis….. I think we need to include more of Alexis. It’s like, she suddenly comes into the picture and then disappears for a long while. Then she returns and….. disappears again. And again. And then doesn’t show up till the end.
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Donaldo the supercoolio awesome nerd
in May 2nd, 2009 @ 12:29317- Yea. Alexis is a cool character.
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Armada
in May 3rd, 2009 @ 19:08Well…. hm. It would be nice to have the characters be a little more in depth, but as Donaldo pointed out, it might be unnecessary with the minor characters. What we could use more of is people not staying in the same role (magician, annoying minor character, person who always shows up in the nick of time in dangerous situations) and more…I dunno, betrayals! Changing sides! Yeah!
((Don’t worry, Alice. I can be sadistic too. ))Re:Alexis–She always seemed a bit annoying to me. She kept showing up when someone needed rescuing, then disappearing again, then reappearing miraculously again, ect. Also, Alexis seems a rather…out of place name in this fantasy universe where everyone else has weird names.
Tera–I like Tera. We need more Tera in later books. Tera is a good pairing with Tam–they provide contrast with each other.
Anyway. That’s all the observations I have for now. Goodbye! *poof*
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Alice
in May 3rd, 2009 @ 19:24319- More betrayals?
I don’t think betrayals is the right word for what you’re describing. But I know what you mean. I just don’t know how to put it into action.Re: Alexis: I like Alexis. More than I did in the beginning, anyway. But she does have a tendency to arrive just in time to save the day, which is kind of annoying, though considerably better than the ubiquitous shelves in Terraformed (you can always find a shelf with exactly what you need). The question is: how to fix that? It’s kind of ingrained in the story.
Re: Alexis’s name: I know it’s not a fantasy name, but I sort of thought the x in there made it weird enough. Octavio’s a real name, too, and in the beginning Ren had a dad who was a formidable pirate named Ryan, and Arn’s first name was Arnold.
!!! I just made a typo that gave me an idea. What if we spelled Alexis with an E? Like, Elexis. Is that better?Re: Tera: Tera’s good. She’s another one of those absolutely hateful characters that are so fun to write because you always know exactly how they’ll respond to any situation.
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Alice
in May 3rd, 2009 @ 19:33Wait…betrayals is the right word. Sorry.
But we definitely don’t need more betrayals. Don’t you think Tam provides enough betrayal for one book?
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kiwimuncher
in May 4th, 2009 @ 06:50Yeah. I think so. I like Elexis though. Totally awesome name!
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Armada
in May 3rd, 2009 @ 19:58320-Yeah, I guess the occasional non-made-up name is fine, if it’s not common. Maybe Alexis could just be around more, so she was already there when whatever stuff that required her to be there happened, and it would seem less miraculous? The shelves in Terraformed (that’s a word, according to my considerably flawed spell checker) don’t sound too bad, actually. If they’re magic or something, then that’s what they do, so it does what it’s supposed to do, that is, always have whatever’s needed, which sounds fine by me.
320.1- I…guess. We just need a few more mini-plot twists, I think.
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Alice
in May 3rd, 2009 @ 20:12321- No, no, Terraformed doesn’t have any magic. The shelves are just there because we could never think of a better solution.
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kiwimuncher
in May 4th, 2009 @ 06:52Really? I never went on that thread. *is amused*
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Armada
in May 4th, 2009 @ 13:45322-Oh, that’s right, it’s sci-fi, right? But, as someone said somewhere, science and magic become indistinguishable when the former is advanced enough…. I really want to read Terraformed. I’ve skimmed the editing thread a few times, and it looks like a really great story… Anyway.
*cannot think of anything else to say*
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in May 9th, 2009 @ 16:10Well, we’ve gotten off topic again!
We were talking about the communication between Tam and Ren in the fire.
How exactly does that work? I don’t recall it being greatly described in the text.
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Alice
in May 9th, 2009 @ 18:03I really dislike the fire scrying. It’s contradictory and annoying. But is there any way we can fix it now?
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in May 17th, 2009 @ 10:38Unless we can find another way for them to communicate. Maybe we could change it so that Tam is the only one who can fire scry, since he’s more powerful then Ren and he does it on purpose. Maybe by wishing he could talk to Ren, I mean, they are friends sort of, and then having a word come into his head or something like it did for Ren before and…. yeah. That may make more since.
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Alice
in May 17th, 2009 @ 14:11326- Wait…Tam’s more powerful? Oh yeah… and Ren can use his powers for longer. OK.
That sounds good.
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Cello-Playing Mathematician (AKA Kyra)
in May 24th, 2009 @ 16:04I thought it was the other way around (Ren’s more powerful but Tam can use powers for longer), but it could be that way (The way you describe it) to make it less of a typical story.
I’m really not sure; I’m going off of what I read more than a year ago.
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Alice
in May 24th, 2009 @ 20:01Oh… I think you might be right.
(Tony: “That’s one thing I know!”
Ernest: “Ridiculous. Plays be about life, like life, for life, or against it.”
Winifred: “The best ones are against it.”
Ernest: “But they can’t be life.”
Tony: “That’s what he said.”
Lora: “Yes, those were his very words.”
Winifred: “Well, Ernest, for once you’re wrong. This is an unexpected pleasure.”
Ernest: “I’m not wrong. I knew that’s what he said. I was just checking to see if you remembered!”
Winifred: “We did.”I could go on and on until the end of the play, but I think I won’t.)
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in May 17th, 2009 @ 15:17rEally? awesome.
Captain Pye stood up and walked out of the cabin, going to find Marmalade. Alexis followed, and Ren was alone. Or so he thought.
Several miles away, Tam moodily scrubbed the long deck of the Bloodstorm. Confusion and indecision swept through him. Using the Orb didn’t seem so bad, and it didn’t sound nearly as life-threatening as working for the pirates. However, he mistrusted the empire and was reluctant to sign his life over to anything, no matter how god the cause. Tam reflected over this situation and his thought inadvertantly moved to Ren. For some reason Tam couldn’t understand, he felt connected to his old companion. Ren had certainly been the only person who had ever regarded him with any sort of friendliness.
After staring at the boards around his feet for a moment, a word entered Tam’s subconcious and he uttered it aloud, much to his surprise, “ Flamela Parleonous .”Ren flopped on the hammock, and once again his thoughts turned to Tam Eizid,………
How’s that? I know I have to work with the other incident too, but I’m gonna have to leave soon, so I won’t start it just yet.
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Alice
in May 17th, 2009 @ 15:47Mm. I dunno. I thought we were going to cut the whole Tam-scrubbing-the-deck thing and set it elsewhere. It doesn’t make sense.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in May 24th, 2009 @ 13:43Really? Arg. What were we gonna do instead?
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in May 30th, 2009 @ 06:21School’s almost out!
Aren’t y’all overjoyed?
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Alice
in May 30th, 2009 @ 12:40331- Overjoyed? Not quite.
On the one hand, I’m so sick of school I could cry.
On the other, I have to finish a math unit by the eighth–that’s eight quizzes. I’m sure I’ll manage, but every day closer to the end of the school year is one less day in which to do my math homework.
On the other hand, the kayaking symposium is coming up and my dad’s making me a kayak specially!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!! I can learn to roll in my own boat! I’m so excited! And I’ll drink inordinate amounts of hot chocolate and play Preposterous Propulsion and freeze every night and sit in the big tree whenever I’m not kayaking and hang out with M— and the D—s and N–M—! And learn to roll! And kayak! And play kayak games! And get really wet! And cut myself on the oysters! And take a paddle-making class! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (As you can see, I’m very excited.)
On the other hand, as soon as I get back from kayaking, I have to go to Summer Academy, not that I need it, but I get money for it and we go to Ashland, which is the main reason I haven’t yet begged my mother to let me not go.
On the first hand (the good one), Meow’s coming to visit in July and I might be a dresser for Bullshot Crummond. And the sooner school gets out, the sooner school gets back in, which means the sooner we do Midsummer Night’s Dream and Black Comedy, which would be splendid if we didn’t have to put up with school on the side. Also, I’m going to be All Alone, since the seniors are graduating and L—‘s going on exchange, so who am I going to eat lunch with?But anyway, yes, I’m excited.
I think I was going to say something about The Sea Roc (what a novel idea!) but I forgot what it was sometime around the freaking out about kayaking.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in May 31st, 2009 @ 15:42The kyacking sounds awesome! It sounds like you’re summer’s gonna be jam packed. I’m sure it’ll be freakishly awesome!
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kiwimuncher
in June 2nd, 2009 @ 14:45Oh, back to subject! What ae we doing instead of having Tam scrub the deck?
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in June 5th, 2009 @ 16:33Dum dee doo! School is OUT!
What about yall?
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Alice
in June 5th, 2009 @ 17:51335- Monday.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in June 9th, 2009 @ 15:44OK. So, we need to get focused! Who’s with me?
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Alice
in June 9th, 2009 @ 16:49I’m here. I’m always here. Focus isn’t my strong point though.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in June 11th, 2009 @ 13:22Hee.
It’s not mine either.
You said that we weren’t going to have Tam scrubbing the deck anymore. So….. he’s going to be chained up somewhere? I guess? Or… did you have something else in mind?
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Alice
in June 11th, 2009 @ 15:15339- No, they’re still treating him as an honored guest, because they want him to think working for the Empire’s just like a big picnic or something, so he’ll agree to work the Orb, and then, well, we all know what happens then. He’s probably in a nice cabin.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in June 11th, 2009 @ 21:03Oh. OK. So Maybe I could change this a bit……. *gets on serious face*
Several miles away, Tam lay moodily on a soft bed. After his talk with Vashkar, he had been led to his new room. It was very nice, much nicer then the cramped hammock he had accomodated on the Searoc . Still, confusion and indecision swept through him. Using the Orb didn’t seem so bad, and it didn’t sound nearly as life-threatening as working for the pirates. Besides, his present situation seemed more agreeable in many overwhelming ways. However, he mistrusted the empire and was reluctant to sign his life over to anything, no matter how good the cause. Tam reflected over this situation and his thoughts inadvertantly moved to Ren. For some reason Tam couldn’t understand, he felt connected to his old companion. Ren had certainly been the only person who had ever regarded him with any sort of friendliness.
After staring at the boards around his feet for a moment, a word entered Tam’s subconcious and he uttered it aloud, much to his surprise, “ Flamela Parleonous .â€Ren flopped on the hammock, and once again his thoughts turned to Tam Eizid,………
Is that better?
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in June 15th, 2009 @ 15:46I will be gone for a month after Wednesday. Just so y’all know.
I lurve vacation!
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Alice
in June 16th, 2009 @ 14:16Look, here’s the thing:
I really strongly dislike fire scrying. If I had my way we would take it out completely. (Of course, if I had my way we might end of rewriting the story like with Terraformed and Etheterre). We don’t have to take it out because I know it’s an integral plot piece, but I feel like we should at least edit it a LOT.That said, what Kiwi just wrote will do very well, for the time being at least.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in June 17th, 2009 @ 06:51OK. Well, bye.
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Alice
in June 17th, 2009 @ 12:09Bye!
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Alice
in June 19th, 2009 @ 14:40Well, I was going to ask for a new thread, but with Kiwimuncher gone for a whole month, there’s not much point. So I shall stay here and think and edit all by myself for a whole month. Egad.
I think the nautical side should actually be easy enough by now. I’ve been reading enough Forester and O’Brian that I think can pull it off after all. When we’ve finished this first edit I’ll go through and clean all the nautical elements up, and then we can have another edit–or two or three–and then maybe we’ll have a halfway decent story.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in July 19th, 2009 @ 12:26I’m back!
A new thread sounds fantastic!
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in July 21st, 2009 @ 13:16*twiddles thumbs* Well… What were we doing before I left? *scrolls up page* Oh yes! We were doing fire scrying! Fantastic! Erm… I guess I’ll connect this…
Captain Pye stood up and walked out of the cabin, going to find Marmalade. Alexis followed, and Ren was alone. Or so he thought.
Several miles away, Tam lay moodily on a soft bed. After his talk with Vashkar, he had been led to his new room. It was very nice, much nicer then the cramped hammock he had accomodated on the Searoc . Still, confusion and indecision swept through him. Using the Orb didn’t seem so bad, and it didn’t sound nearly as life-threatening as working for the pirates. Besides, his present situation seemed more agreeable in many overwhelming ways. However, he mistrusted the empire and was reluctant to sign his life over to anything, no matter how good the cause. Tam reflected over this situation and his thoughts inadvertantly moved to Ren. For some reason Tam couldn’t understand, he felt connected to his old companion. Ren had certainly been the only person who had ever regarded him with any sort of friendliness.
After staring at the boards around his feet for a moment, a word entered Tam’s subconcious and he uttered it aloud, much to his surprise, “ Flamela Parleonous .â€Ren flopped on his hammock, and once again his thoughts turned to Tam Eizid. How he wanted to share his wonder with someone! So much new power, and only one other person could have any idea what it was like.
He heard a rush of wind, and a very small, bright fire appeared a few feet away, hovering less than half an inch above the floor. “Did I start it?†he asked himself. Perhaps this was the beginning of the end. Maybe he had misused his power already, and Sphaere was doomed.
The fire grew bigger and bigger, and Ren, with a nightmare passivity, watched it grow larger, closer, brighter. Soon it would reach his hammock, and then him and – Ren couldn’t think about that. He closed his eyes tightly. Nothing happened, but an odd sensation came over him. He tried to cry out and failed. He opened his eyes to see images moving around him and heard voices. The images cleared away, and he was standing in a nigh empty room. He appeared to be alone except for a boy sitting on a bed next to him. “Tam?!” he exclaimed.Captain Pye found Ren lying on the floor next to his hammock. He was asleep or in a trance, and appeared to be holding a conversation with a voice unheard.
“Where is this?†asked Ren.
“The Blood Storm,†replied Tam. “Well, not really. I’m not sure where we are. I was on the Blood Storm, a minute ago.â€
“Did you set something on fire?â€
“Me? I don’t think so. Why?â€
Ren took a breath. “Did you know you have fire power, Tam?â€
“How do you know about that?â€
“Because I do too. I set my legs on fire. See?†He gestured to his blistered calves.
“Ouch,†said Tam sympathetically.
Ren frowned. Something had occurred to him. “You do know about your talent. Captain said you didn’t.â€
“The Blood Storm’s weatherweaver told me about it. He wants me to use some orb. He’s paying me an awful lot.â€
“Oh, no,†moaned Ren. But then the grayness that surrounded him and Tam closed in, bringing with it all the previous images. He cried out, and woke.
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Alice
in July 21st, 2009 @ 15:29Mm… I don’t know. I don’t like that scene at all. I might rewrite it later, if that’s OK with you.
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in July 22nd, 2009 @ 13:12YEah, that’s oK.
I’m all for it. I don’t particularly like their conversation anyway. It’s kind of flat.
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Alice
in July 26th, 2009 @ 14:38UGGHHHHHHHH. Ughughughugh. -deep breath- This is only the first edit, this is only the first edit, this is only the first edit…
Anyway, I spent a lot of time rereading this thread and I have to go do other stuff now, but I’ll do more than freak out later, and can we p*eeeaaase have a new thread, O Great And Powerful Administrators?
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kiwimuncher (3 B-Day points) (50 Muszey points)
in July 26th, 2009 @ 15:05Yes! It’s high time we did! I mean, we’re WAY over 300! Peas GAPAs? PEAS?!
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