MuseBlog

A thread for polls and questions, by request of Krissy also known as Kricket.
Got questions? Got answers?
Here’s the place to post at least some of them.

First step is to pick Muses. So far the following roles have been filled:
Kokopelli (Ebeth)
Mimi (mutant_hairy_thing)
Urania (MontgomeryGurl)
Aeiou (Phoenix)
Bo (Phoenix Elassë-Adæl)
Chad (Phoebe)
Crraw (Krissy also known as Kricket)
Pwt (Sheep lilbro777)
Feather (KitKat)

Non-Muses who have appeared so far:
Devil (Kokopelli’s puppy; a non-speaking but very active role) (Sheep)
Tenrecs (Lizzie)
Hot-pink bunnies (Neo)
Oog the cave person (Lorelei)
Professor Cosmo Mastiff (random rohan freak)
Blind cave fish (Rabid Pansy)
Star-nosed mole (ChinTsu)

Also possible:
Various editors, cartoonists, and celebrity guests

A forum for practicing archaic English, foreign languages, and other off-the-beaten-track forms of communication.

(Coy woodnesse means “quiet madness” in Middle English, the version of our language spoken about 600 years ago.)

Useful resources (additions welcome!):
“Chaucer’s Middle English” site at the University of California, Santa Barbara
Librarius has another Middle English glossary and a load of information about Chaucer and the Canterbury Tales

Your wish is our command.

In Robert’s latest attempt to mingle Muses and magic, Feather takes a hike with Fleur Delacour. Read more »

People seem to want to talk about them, so here goes.

Check out the list on the new Hints Page.

We’re not sure whether they all work. For the ones without symbols, try putting the emoticon’s name between colons, :like_this:

Have fun!

It had to happen sooner or later. A pink-bunny-free zone.

Some MuseBloggers have complained that it’s getting hard to keep up with the flow of messages here. That’s particularly true for those who aren’t on line every day. So as an experiment, we’re devoting this area to longer messages–say, a good, solid paragraph and up. Anything shorter will be sent to the FMP. (No blocks of hundreds of smiley faces, please!) The idea is to create a space similar to Muse Mail or the pre-blog message area on the dear old Gaboomba. Here goes…

A chance to talk about them behind their backs.

A thread for talking about the magazine itself–what a radical concept!

A place to write about music, at Lizzie’s suggestion.

We think it’s supposed to work like this:

(1) PhoenixMontgomeryGurl posts the first chapter of a long story.
(2) Somebody else writes Chapter 2.
(3) Somebody else writes Chapter 3.
(4) Etc.

All right, MuseBloggers, it’s all yours.

We’re not sure which century he was born in, but October 13 is the day. Felicitations and joy, moste worthie master.

On Wednesday, October 12, another 13-year-old bites the dust. She calls herself “The Lurker” now, but she’ll always be Ebeth to us. (She’s a poster, not a lurker, anyway.) Carpe diem!

By request of Her Former Majesty, MontgomeryMongtomeryGurl.

The estimable Museblog Controller has pointed out that a plethora of Queens are making appearances on the blog. He ‘s asked me to explain, from my wealth of knowledge of heraldry and matters Royal (ha!), the correct procedure for setting oneself up as a monarch, and the correct form of address by one who hasn’t to one who has.

Right then. Firstly, you need to own a country. Sorry, but that’s pretty obligatory for a monarch. And it can’t be some poxy little rock in the middle of nowhere, either. The practical minimum is something the size of Tonga. I know it doesn’t look that big on the map, but it’s a big map.

Next, you have to get most of your subjects to agree that you own it. There’s always going to be a rebel element, so you’ll need a gang of thugs (sorry, a glorious army) to stop the rebels getting inconvenient. You also need to control religion. That has a habit of getting out of hand.

That’s about it, really. If everyone else reckons you’re Queen (or King), that’s what you are. Now they just need to show a bit of respect and address you correctly.

If they write to you, they should address you as “Your Majesty” throughout the correspondence, and finish with ‘I have the honour to be, Madam, Your Majesty’s humble and obedient servant’. It’s a bit of a mouthful in conversation, so they’ll only have to call you “Your Majesty” the first time they address you. Then, until you throw them out because you’re bored, they can revert to the suitably obsequious “Ma’am” or “Sir”.

Should you have a spouse or immediate progeny, the same rules apply, except that they get called “Your Royal Highness”.

“Your Grace” is reserved for high members of your Church hierarchy. Unless you revert to the early Tudor form, where the monarch was addressed as “Your grace” as head of the Church.

You need to give your most sycophantic cronies some juicy titles to play with. The order of poshness is as follows :

Duke/Duchess, Marquis/Marquess, Earl/Countess, Viscount, Baron, Baronet. Dukes and Duchesses are called “Your Grace” (confusingly). Everyone else is “My Lord” or “My Lady”, which is even more confusing, because there are also Lords of the Manor. This is the only title you can actually buy.

I hope that clarifies the situation. I very much doubt whether it does.

On Friday, October 7, she turns 13 — a very fashionable age.

Another month, another meandering one-size-fits-all thread. Lurkers, step into the light! But remember The Rules.

As promised on page 6 in the October 2005 Muse Mail section, here are sound files of the B. family’s unforgettable Dumpster Dive song in AIFF and MP3 formats. Now we know how Musers’ parents afford those pricey subscriptions. All together now:

Oh, Dumpster dive, Dumpster dive,
Don’t mind if it’s been used.
We buffed and shined and mended tight
And wiped off all the poo!

(The Mac-friendly AIFF version is 25.5 megabytes in size–probably too big for dialup modems. The MP3 version is a more manageable 2.8 megabytes.)

She Who Must Not Be Named reports that only 1/10 the usual number of letters have arrived this month. So if you want your name (well, first name and last initial) to be immortalized in print, now’s a good time to try for it. You listening, Pheebs?

We’re curious.

So many ways to procrastinate, so little time.
How do you procrastinate? How do you not procrastinate?
Per ebeth’s request, a thread on procrastination.

By special request of Queen Julietaini the Flamablamablous of Kiador

October 2005 (volume 9, number 8 )

In keeping with age-old Muse tradition, the editors have filled this issue with creepy stuff.

COVER: How to Read a Tombstone

FIRST PAGE: Wonder Drug

KOKOPELLI & COMPANY: Trick and/or treat.

ARTICLES AND COLUMNS:
Sweet Elixir of Death, by Paul Collins
The Case of the Four-Armed Corpse, by Stephanie Pain
Sent to the Tower, by Paul Baker
How to Read a Tombstone, by Douglas Keister

Q & A, by Robert Coontz and Rosanne Spector: How do birds chirp?
Math Page, by Ivars Peterson: Sudoku Mania

LAST PAGE: Designed by the Desert? [Egyptian pyramids and Sphinx]